LOST and LOST 2
by edwardsoul
Summary: Lost 1-7 years later Edward comes back. Bella's a tough NYC girl who vows to take down C-Corp. What happens when she learns who owns C-Corp? LOST 2- Simmons is introduced to a female vampire.He's dated many beautiful women,what happens when me meets her?
1. JUGULAR

**Well, it's good to be here again. Hello to anyone I have met around the site! I have missed talking to all of you. So, did you all love Eclipse as much as I did??**

**If you want to know how I came up with this story, read on. If not, go to the next paragraph. Okay, in July, A guy took my on a date to the Michael Buble' concert. Do you know who that is? He sang on American Idol last year. He is sort of a Frank Sinatra, sing old songs, crooner, dark night club kind of singer. He has a great voice. He is 31 and very sexy if I say so myself. During the concert, he sang a song he had written, called "Lost". I listened to the words and I was amazed. I kept thinking, these would be the words Edward would sing to Bella if they were apart for a very long time. For the rest of the concert, a story began weaving its way into my mind. I worked on it during vacations and the beginning of the school year, and have been tweaking it waiting for the Fall, because, well the whole story is set in the Fall and Winter, and it just seemed like the perfect time to post it.**

**Whenever I write a story, I always think of it as a movie. "Beautiful Soul" is my independent studio, artsy movie. "Coming Back To You" is my epic battle Oscar Nominated movie, and "Lost" is my romantic comedy movie - Kinda like How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days, or 13 Going on 30. There is Humor, Drama, and Heat. Three good things all romantic comedies need!**

**This story is set in New York City, which is my fav place in the WHOLE WORLD! Music plays a very important part in this story, and in my mind I have even created a soundtrack. If I write out the words to a song, it is because they fit perfectly, and gets you into the right mind set for the chapter. Michael Buble' is perfect for a New York setting and his songs play a big part in here.**

**This first chapter has some technical stuff in it. My grandpa worked as an investment banker in New York City, and is now retired. I drilled him like crazy. I don't use the technical stuff very often, so don't freak out. Instead, look for clues as to who you think owns C-CORP! All the places I mention in the story, are places that my awesome Grandpa took me.**

**I hope I have made it interesting enough for you to stay with me! I will update every day!**

**Love you all! Please Review!**

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I stood in the middle of my living room in the dark staring at the clock as if it were my mortal enemy. I watched as the second hand kept moving, _tick . . .tick . . .tick,_ oblivious to the fact that I wanted to desperately stop time from ever moving forward.

I closed my eyes and in the silence, I could almost hear every dream that I had kept secretly locked in a secret and small part of my heart, slowly seeping through the cracks in my soul and dissipating into thin air.

Fifteen more seconds, 10 more seconds, 5 more, and then my shoulders slumped and all the air escaped out of me as I hung my head in defeat. Just like it always had, time had kept moving, even for me.

Time was heartless, blind, and cruel.

It was midnight. The date was September 13th. And I was now twenty five years old. I shook my head and once again berated myself. _Stupid Bella, stupid foolish Bella._

It had been seven years since he had walked away and left me in the forest, and another birthday had come to me. Wherever he was, I knew in that perfect mind of his that he never forgot anything. Whether or not he wanted to, his mind would remember this day as my birthday and he would know how old I was.

And he didn't care.

I knew it was irrational, but this birthday, turning twenty five, seemed even more final. If he was ever going to come back, he would have done it before I was twenty-five. After that, I would just be too old. The span in our ages would be too great. There were plenty of younger vampires that could do the job much better.

I stared at the clock. One minute had gone by. My mind screamed like it always did, _You can stand here counting the minutes_ _until you're ninety-two and he still won't come back!_ I knew that, I really did. My heart was just screaming for something else.

He was somewhere in the world and he was unchanged. The perfect boy that still found a way to invade my thoughts. His crooked smile was still perfect, his bronze hair was perfect, and his arms were still the only place I had ever wanted to be.

I was going to turn twenty-six, and then twenty-seven. I had to stand and face it for the last time. This was beginning of my life, I told myself. No more looking back. Why did it feel like a life sentence?

The clock, uncaring to my misery, was still ticking. I turned around, straightened my shoulders, and went to bed.

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_When you're dreamin' with a broken heart,_

_The waking up is the hardest part._

_You roll out of bed and down on your knees, _

_And for a moment you can hardly breathe,_

_Wondering was he really here?_

_Is he standing in my room?_

_No he's not,_

_Cause he's gone, gone, gone._

_- - - - _

_When you're dreamin' with a broken heart,_

_The giving up is the hardest part._

_Wondering could you stay my love?_

_Would you wake up by my side?_

_No he can't._

_Cause he's gone, gone, gone._

_- - - -_

_Do I fall asleep with roses in my hand?_

_Would you get them if I did?_

_No you won't._

_Cause you're gone, gone, gone._

_- - - Dreaming with a Broken Heart, John Mayer_

**Bella's POV - **

I heard the irritating beeping of my alarm clock and threw my hand out of my covers as I searched for the button that would end my annoyance. My eyes squinted in the darkness as I looked at my clock. 5:00 a.m. I pulled the covers over my face and closed my eyes again. It was only for a moment, but it was enough. Before I could stop myself a memory rushed in.

_The steady beat of the rain hitting the window in my bedroom woke me, and I slowly opened my eyes. I glanced up at my clock and saw that it was 5:15 a.m. I turned over in the darkness. My hands found him before my eyes did. He was staring at me with a crooked smile on his face. My angel. I moved over and snuggled in to him as close as possible. I could smell him as I felt his marble arms close tight around me. I kissed his neck and I heard his magical voice whisper, "It's 5:00 in the morning. You should go back to sleep." I put my mouth next to his ear and whispered back, "I'm not sleepy." _

_I pulled back my covers so he could slide underneath them. I felt his hand move slowly into my hair as he stared at me, then, his cold lips were on mine as I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him down onto my pillow._

My eyes shot open and I threw back the sheet as I fell out of bed and onto my knees. My hand went to my mouth as I swallowed the tears that were threatening to spill over, but I was determined that they would never show themselves. I was angry. Angry because I knew the rules. _Jump out of bed as soon as the alarm goes off, Bella_. _Never allow any unguarded moments in which your mind may begin to wander. _

I knew from experience that as soon as I let my mind be free, it would go where it always wanted to go, and I was fully aware of what that kind of thinking could do to me

_That memory was only 10 seconds at the most_, I told myself.

I brought my hand down from my mouth, picked myself up, and began walking to my bathroom. I was getting better and better at controlling it. That is what I always told myself. I was getting better and better all the time.

I got on shorts and a shirt, put on my running shoes and strapped my i-pod on my arm. I heard the hard rock music begin blasting in my ear as I rode the elevator down the sixty-five floors to the lobby. Hard rock and Rap were the only music I allowed myself to listen to. I pulled my hair back into a ponytail and I shut my eyes, trying to forget about everything and anything except running.

Philip, the night guard, waved at me as I walked across the massive lobby and out the doors. Most mornings I ran five or six miles. The mornings I woke up with dreams about _him_, or let myself think about _him_ I usually pushed myself a little harder. I felt a good eight mile day coming on. One way or another, I would get him out of my system, out of my heart.

The cool, late September air was perfect for running and about four miles into my jog, I felt my head begin to clear. The hard beat of the obnoxious music helped to drive out all unwanted thoughts. I pushed myself to run harder, faster. I wasn't as clumsy as I used to be, but having to concentrate on not tripping, also helped to keep my mind off the wrong things.

I was becoming myself again. I fought the weak, pathetic Bella from earlier and switched into a higher gear. Today was going to be one of the biggest days of my life. I had scheduled the big meeting to begin at 8:00 a.m. This meeting would be an important one. It would determine the future direction of the company, and my career.

Business had been my major in college, and I was definitely in business. We were beginning a hostile takeover of #9 on the Fortune 500. There was no way for them to get out of it, we had them over the hot coals. It was my job to turn up the heat until they were burned to a crisp.

After high school, (a time I try not to ever think about,) I began a new chapter in my life. It was called, "Be a Human" This is what _he _wanted for me, _he _wanted me to be human, then so be it.

In college, I threw myself into my studies. The human mind is like a sieve, right? I did everything I could to forget about him. I took classes year round. I worked at the library on campus so that I could sneak and study after the library was closed. I became the teaching assistant for my professors so that I could earn more credits. I tutored students so that I could earn more money and therefore, take more classes. I pushed myself to be on the Dean's list and positioned myself at the top of my class.

Men weren't exactly high on my list. In fact they weren't even on the list. I did nothing to encourage men. I purposely had "relaxed" my standards of appearance. Through college I was known as "frump girl." I didn't want anyone talking to me or getting too close to me, and I certainly didn't want a relationship. I just wanted to get through my studies, and I succeeded. I graduated with my Masters at the age of twenty-two.

My rise in the company was nothing short of meteoric. After graduation, I was hired by the #1 high power New York investment firm, Berkshire-Hathaway almost immediately. After I was hired, every boss I had was so impressed with my work ethic and my heartless ability to get the job done, that I kept getting promoted. I crushed anyone that stood in my way of success. I worked harder and longer than anyone else. I was happy for all the responsibility that the CEO had placed on my shoulders. Hard work meant no down time.

Now, I was at the pinnacle. After only three years in the company, at the age of twenty five, I had just been awarded the job that had belonged to my old boss, the Vice President. I felt a little bad about taking the man's job, but hey, it's all part of being "human" right?

I came back into the lobby a sweaty mess. My ears were ringing from the loud annoying music, but now my head was on straight. I was ready to crack some skulls in the meeting today. I waved at Oscar, the morning doorman, and rushed to the elevator. My driver would be here to pick me up at 7:30 a.m., and I was never late for anything.

Sometimes I marveled at how much I had changed in the last seven years. As my salary increased, I did two things. I bought a Penthouse Suite on Fifth Avenue, and learned how to dress to kill. My intention was not to get a man, it was to throw off balance any man that got in the way of my success. I was known in the high stakes world of cutthroat marketing as the "Bitch in heels" and it was a title I wore proudly.

I stood in my massive closet deciding what to wear. I chose for today a blood red dress that was knit and fit tight against my thighs. I wore four inch black pumps that made my legs look extremely long and slender. (I practiced walking in them for two weeks before I went out in public). I wore my long hair down. I styled it so it had a slight wave to it and it was so shiny that the light bounced off of it when I moved. I was never one to overdo the makeup, but just the right amount of blush, mascara and blood red lipstick put the finishing touch to my outfit.

The phone rang, my driver was here. I strapped my phone on my ear and began calling those on my team that would be at the meeting today. I stole one last appraising look in the mirror and then headed out the door with my briefcase.

I was four for four. I had taken down every company I had gone after.

I had never lost.

As the driver pulled in front of our high rise offices, I got one last call from Simmons, my assistant. Everyone was sitting in the room and ready. Perfect. I was ready for my grand entrance. I loved hunting, especially early in the morning. In a few hours the company would be ours. I smelled blood and I was going in for the kill. I was going for the jugular, and I would suck them dry.

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An hour and a half into the meeting, the adversary finally broke down and realized that they were pushed into a corner from which there was no escape. Their lawyers had their head in their hands and beads of sweat were on their foreheads. I smelled victory. I had made the company roughly 42.5 billion dollars and it wasn't even 10:00 a.m. yet.

I turned to Simmons and with my eyes communicated that I was turning the meeting over to him. I stood up and said, "Gentlemen, it has been a pleasure working with you. I will leave you in the capable hands of my staff," and then I left the room. I never bothered with the details. I left that to the little people.

As I approached my office, my head secretary stood up immediately and began walking rapidly along beside me. "Ms. Swan, I have your list of clients for today and your phone messages are sitting on your desk. I took the liberty of setting up your lunch meeting at the client's favorite restaurant."

She was out of breath from running. I glanced quizzically at her. _For crying out loud_, I thought. I was walking in four inch heels, why she couldn't she keep up with me?

She gulped a large amount of air and started in again. "Mr. Clooney has called twice and left a message for you to call him on his private number."

I rolled my eyes. I attended one movie premiere as a favor to a production company and that Joe . . . or was it George, Clooney somebody would not stop calling me.

"Please Sally, get rid of that guy." I said exasperated.

Her eyes were wide. You want me to give George Clooney the brush-off?"

Ah, it was George then, I was right. "Yes, do whatever, tell him I have some horrible disease, or something." I waved my hand at her. We were almost at my office now.

"He was just voted the sexiest guy on the planet! For the third time!" She said in a high pitched voice.

_Not as beautiful as the boy I once loved . . . Shut up Bella!_

Sally looked strangely at my face. I was clenching my teeth and my face was all twisted. I took a large breath and said, "Is there anything else, Sally?" She handed me a large thick folder. "Here is the information you requested on that company, C- CORP."

I took the folder from her and walked into my office.

She raised her voice, "Remember that the CEO of Radial Systems will be here to meet with you in twenty minutes." She got the last few words out as the large wooden double doors closed on her face. I sat down in my plush leather chair and breathed a sigh of relief.

The first rule of business is to never let the enemy see you show fear. I had been afraid today. Afraid that the whole takeover would fall apart right in front of my face. I had worried that those lawyers for the adversary would have some last minute trick up their sleeves, but we had done it. My team and I had taken down one of the biggest companies of all time. I smiled. Smiling was an extravagance I didn't allow myself very often these days, but I allowed myself one short smile.

I was five for five. I had a perfect winning record.

I leaned back in my chair and turned to stare out over the cityscape. Having a corner office with walls that were floor to ceiling windows allowed me to have a panoramic view of Central Park and most of Upper Manhattan. It was a beautiful sight. From up this high I felt like I had a window on the world. A window where I could see out, without anyone looking back in on me. Which is just how I liked it. I could look down on the people below without them ever knowing I was here. Without them ever knowing what was really going on inside of me.

I especially loved the way the city looked at night when it was lit up like a sparkling diamond. I spent most nights here, until at least 1:00 or 2:00 a.m. Then I would go home for a few hours sleep, and start this all over again.

I turned back to my desk. That was all the down time my mind could risk. Instinct kept me busy at all times. In front of me, in the very thick folder that Sally had given me, was my next opponent. I opened the folder to read until my appointment arrived.

About a year ago, while researching financial records of successful companies, I came across C- CORP. First, I was intrigued at the profits that the company had made, and second, I was amazed at their secrecy. As I read over everything I could find on C- CORP, I began to get that feeling that came over me when I found a company that was perfect for a hostile takeover. Like I was the predator, and they were the prey.

I alerted the CEO, Mr. Sterling Hathaway, about C- CORP, and within the week we were quietly buying up shares of stock through small companies that would not alert anyone as to what we were doing. It took some effort, but six months later, we had bought shares totaling 42 of the company. It wouldn't be long now. There were however, some things about C- CORP I still didn't know, like who owned the company. I eagerly opened the file expecting to get my answers.

I had hired interns to spend months going over every part of the company's records with a fine tooth comb. The folder contained important information that listed, among other things, the weaknesses of the company. The details I required were specific, I wanted as much data as possible. I wanted to know what brand of dental floss the CEO used, anything I could turn to my advantage. But, from the very first paragraph, I saw that the interns had been as unsuccessful as I had been in finding the company's owner.

I read down farther thinking surely I would learn the name. In all my years, I had never seen anything like it. The billionaire behind this company requested to remain anonymous. The person had taken great pains in assuring secrecy. This was going to be a challenge. All I could glean, was that the company dealt primarily in foreign countries and for some odd reason, Alaska. The money had been made by setting up small promising businesses and nursing them into large money-making corporations.

The financial backer had been careful and patient. Some of these businesses had been purchased back in the early 1900's. The companies were built slowly, almost as if he or she thought they had all the time in the world. The businesses had somehow managed to flourish even through the Great Depression in the 1930's. The backer had cleverly protected the companies right before the stock market crash, almost as if he had some warning it was going to happen.

One thing I couldn't figure out is how this company had stayed together for so long. Surely the original backer had died long ago.

When computers came into their own in the early 1960's the profits of C- CORP went through the roof. Again, it was almost as if the company knew what an astronomical effect computers would play in the world to come.

How this company had stayed off the radar of so many other headhunters was beyond me, but I was going to get them. They had taken great pains to stay quiet and private, but I was going to acquire this company and break it up into a hundred different pieces all going to the highest bidder.

There had to be some clue as to who was holding the money behind this billion dollar company. I felt the rush of the hunt coming on. My instincts were taking over. Another diversion to keep my mind busy.

The "C" in C- CORP had to be a clue. "Okay "C", I said, while talking to the folder. "I am coming after you. Your number will be up the first time I meet you," I then sneered at the folder.

Sally opened my door and made a face as she saw me talking to my desk. She paused a moment and then said, "Ms. Swan, Mr. Jensen is here for his appointment."

"Send him in," I said as I hastily put the folder in my top drawer. I smelled fresh blood and I would show no restraint. I wasn't about to let this C- CORP get away from me. I could be a real monster when I wanted to be.


	2. FACE THE FACTS

**Hey! Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. You guys are the best. I had great comments and questions. This chapter is quite a bit shorter. I want to make sure everybody knows that I will update everyday. There seemed to be confusion about that. Hope you like!**

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**(Bella's POV) **

I stared at myself in the mirror. I was wearing a black dinner dress that went clear to the floor. It laced up the back in a criss cross pattern and was sleeveless in a tank top design. It had been two weeks since I had begun my mission to find out the identity of the mysterious "C". I had found out absolutely nothing. I fussed a bit more with my hair. Tonight, I was wearing it in loose curls, flowing down my back.

My driver would be here any minute. I was going to another excruciating dinner party at the home of the mayor of New York. The only incentive to my accepting the invitation was that someone there may have a lead on "C". I walked over to my huge window and stared out over the night lights of the city and sighed.

The view of the lights sent a memory weaving its way into my thoughts. It began so subtle and harmless that at first, I wasn't even aware of what it was.

_I was standing on the platform of the Seattle Space Needle. It was night time and the city was bright with lights. The reflection blurred out into the ocean and a ship could be seen shining it's lights far out in the Pacific. A breeze fluttered my hair and I felt two cold stone arms come behind me and envelop me._

"_Hello, love." The voice was warm, like a velvet blanket draping over me._

_I relaxed back into his strong shoulders as he began softly humming my lullaby in my ear. I laced my fingers through his as his cold breath sent_ _chills down my neck_.

The memory was brief, but it had the effect of a thunderbolt crashing in my brain.

For so long I had not felt anything, that when a memory came back to me in which I felt . . .well, everything . . .it paralyzed me. My forehead rested against the window. My arms were instinctively around my middle holding tight. It was a crippling thing. These unhealed gashes that continued to throb and bleed despite the passage of time. I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths. I had shown that I had grown strong enough to bear it. I just needed a moment. I clenched my teeth and rode out the storm. I couldn't even go running now and drive it all out of me.

My phone rang, the driver had arrived, I had to go.

I grabbed my small handbag as I slowly walked out the door, not bothering to check how I looked in the mirror.

The dinner party was, predictable. I spent most of the evening deflecting the advances of the men in attendance. You would think that some inner instinct on these men would make them naturally want to shy away from me. The Senior Senator of New York was particularly insistent.

"So, Ms. Swan, I noticed that you are from the Upper West Coast. Is that true?"

I held my drink between us like it was a dagger. "Yes, I lived a few hours North of Seattle," I said flatly.

He flashed his politician vote-getting smile and said, "The Seattle Seahawks are playing the Giants this Sunday, and I have a Suite. I would love for you to join me."

I thought I remembered hearing one of the guys at the office mention once that the Giants were a football team here in New York. I would rather pull out all my fingernails than sit through a football game. I answered with as little emotion as possible.

"Sorry, but Sunday is just another working day to me. I will be at the office all day."

He was used to fighting for the vote. "Oh, you can't tell me that you have anything so important you can't take off for a few hours. It's a night game. You can work until 4:00 that afternoon. I will take you back to your office after the game if you want, unless you find me so much fun you decide to stay."

He actually raised his eyebrows up and down when he said that. I fought off the urge to just throw my drink in his face and walk away. Instead, I swallowed the urge and said, "Tempting, but no." That's when I walked away.

I saw my assistant Simmons from across the room. He was the quintessential California guy. A very smart California guy. For some reason, he thought the women found it attractive for him to keep his blond hair just long enough that it lazily fell to the side of his face, almost covering one of his dark brown eyes. Quite a few women had proved his theory right. With that long blonde hair, and the fact that he was 6'2, it was always fairly easy to spot him at a party.

He walked towards me knowingly. I narrowed my eyes as I said, "One of your jobs is to stand by me so that Senators and the like aren't free to hit on me. That's what I pay you the big bucks for."

He just laughed and said, "Sorry ice queen, but we humans need to use the bathroom once in a while."

I just sneered and said, "Yes . . .well, I also saw you stop and talk to that supermodel, "Gazelle - what's her name."

Simmons laughed deeply. "Her name is Giselle Bundchen." His thick eyebrows raised appreciatively. "And if you tried to fire me over that one, there wouldn't be a jury in the world that would take your side."

I folded my arms in a huff and said in a low voice, "Have you been able to find out anything about C - CORP?"

I sat my drink on a tray as it went by. I never touched the stuff. It dulled the senses and I liked to remain sharp. At parties like this, it was more or less a prop.

Simmons just breathed a heavy sigh and said, "Not only hasn't anyone got information, most of the guests here have never even heard of the company. C- CORP has been quietly making millions of dollars a year without anyone even being alerted about it."

He looked around to make sure no one was paying attention to him and said, "Most of the Fortune 500 players are in this room. If they don't know anything, no one will."

I was frustrated beyond belief. Now it was getting to be a game with me. I didn't like to lose games. Smelling the prey, and not being able to pounce, was driving me mad. I was in this now just as much for the thrill of the challenge as anything else.

"Warning," Simmons muttered. "Boss coming in quick on your left."

I turned and plastered a smile on my face. "Good evening, Mr. Hathaway," I purred.

"Good evening to you, Isabella. You are looking stunning as always. Just like a beautiful cat luring the mouse to his death." He smiled wickedly.

If there was one person more brutal and ruthless in this world than me, it was my boss, the CEO of Berkshire-Hathaway, Mr. Sterling Hathaway himself. He leaned in closer. "Do you have any news about C- CORP yet?" He whispered.

I shook my head. "Not yet Mr. Hathaway, but we are nowhere close to giving up. We will have their head on our chopping block soon."

He pumped my hand and smiled wickedly again. "Oh, I'm sure of that. I have no doubt in my mind whatsoever. Happy hunting," he said as he slapped me hard on the back and walked away following the drink tray.

Before I could open my mouth to talk to Simmons, I felt a very soft touch on the outside of my elbow. I turned to see a man about 6'4 with thick, coal black wavy hair looking at me. He had tan, rugged, chiseled features like from a Abercrombie & Fitch ad. And I couldn't help but notice that he had the darkest blue eyes I had ever seen. I looked at him expectantly.

"Excuse me," he said in a deep but soft voice. "I don't begin to think you have any desire to know me, but I have to leave soon and I would regret it for the rest of my life if I didn't come over here and meet you." He then stuck out his hand and said "Hello, my name is Thomas Vaughn, and you are?"

Before I could open my mouth I heard a garbled squeak come out of Simmons' throat. I looked at him curiously.

"I am Isabella Swan," I replied. I put out my hand to shake with him, but instead, he took my hand and lifted it up and while his eyes never left mine, he lightly touched it to his lips. "Hello Isabella," he whispered.

Simmons finally seemed to find his voice. "You're Thomas Vaughn!" he said.

I looked at Simmons with narrowed eyes. "I think we already established that," I quipped.

Simmons didn't appear to hear me. "Hey man, I am a huge fan." he said. He stuck out his hand and began shaking Vaughn's hand vigorously. "You are the best quarterback the New York Giants have had in fifteen years! Your game last Sunday was unbelievable! That throw in the last three seconds to win the game was just . . ."

Simmons didn't seem to be able to finish his sentence. I looked at Vaughn and he seemed embarrassed and a little uncomfortable. He smiled at Simmons and then he looked down and blushed a little as he said, "Look, if the two of you are together, I'm sorry . . ."

"No!" Simmons practically spit on the guy. He came behind me and grabbed me by the shoulders and pointed me in Vaughn's direction. I had no idea that he was so strong. He gave me a slight push as he said, "Here, you can have her!"

I whipped my head around and gave a horror filled look at Simmons. He just whispered furiously through clenched teeth, "Look, I know you haven't had a date in like, ever. You might as well have been in a convent. You will do this! This is Thomas Vaughn!" He nudged me forward slightly as he whispered, "Now smile like you're human."

I turned back and smiled politely. I winced a little. I think I pulled a muscle in my cheek from not smiling for so long. I guess it worked, because I got a 100 watt smile shot right back at me.

"Listen," Vaughn said. "I'm very sorry, but I really have to go. Is there a chance that you would go out with me this Sunday afternoon?"

I had not been on a date since I went with _him_ to his house on my eighteenth birthday. I had no desire to do this. I didn't want to go anywhere with Thomas Vaughn or anyone else. I never would. Not ever. I opened my mouth to tell him "No" when I felt Simmons grab the back of my head and move it up and down. I was nodding "yes" against my will.

"Great!" Said Vaughn. "May I call you?"

Simmons jumped out from behind me and handed Vaughn a napkin with my personal cell number scrawled across it. Vaughn chuckled and bent a little at the waist and said, "Until Sunday." Then he turned and left.

I stared after him, blinking in shock at what just happened. I turned to look at Simmons with my eyes narrowed and spat out, "What in the hell was that?"

"Hey, don't even start, okay? Honestly, on Monday morning you'll come in to work thanking me. You need a date like . . .well, like a flower needs the rain."

"What?" I breathed out.

His wide smile spread across his face. "Where's your sense of adventure?" he asked.

_Adventure, I was set to have the greatest adventure of all, then_ _he took it all away from me_. I just stared at Simmons and didn't answer.

Simmons actually got serious. He put a hand on my shoulder. "Look, you are dead inside, Bella." He put his hand up to stop me from interrupting. "I know, I know, you have it altogether. You can go in for the kill like nobody has ever seen, but you are not really living. Somewhere along the way something or someone killed anything in you that made you human. You are here with us, but more like a walking corpse."

I straightened up and folded my arms indignantly. He had no right to talk to me like that. I was his boss, his superior. I could fire him right there on the spot. I pursed my lips into a hard line and thought about how much his words stung, but I would never show it. I thought I had hidden all the hurt down so deep that no one saw anything when they looked at me but a tough, no nonsense, smart woman. Apparently, there was at least one person who wasn't fooled. Was there anyone else who could see through me? I would just have to make my shell harder to penetrate. I wasn't about to go down. This shell was the only thing keeping me together.

He put his hands on both my shoulders and said, "Look, I am not saying you have to marry the guy, you don't even have to go out with him again if you don't want to, but come on, Bella. Face the facts, you are alive. You're here. Things are happening all around you if you would just look." He got closer to my face and whispered "You're alive."

I stared at him and swallowed hard. "Alive" meant my heart was beating and blood was coursing through my veins. It usually meant you had hopes and dreams for the future. Alive. I wasn't so sure he was right.

Once, long ago, because of true love I'd made the decision that I wasn't going to be human anymore. Somehow, that had altered me. No matter what world I was currently living in, I wanted to live in that other one.

Was there a manual floating around somewhere that I could buy that would teach me how to be human? "Human for Dummies," perhaps? Or maybe, "How to Become a Human in Three Easy Steps?"

Everyone else seemed to be doing okay with it. All around me, I could hear laughter and joking. People engaging in real conversations. I saw a woman flirting with three men by the bar. Even Sterling Hathaway seemed to be able to be ruthless with a few human traits mixed in. Why couldn't I do this?

There was only one reason.

And he didn't care.

I growled, and left the party. I was going back to the office. Work was calling my name.

- - - - - - - -

**See ya tomorrow! Much more to come!**


	3. DATES, NAMES, AND CLUES

**Hey! Thank you so much for the great reviews! I am having a great time. I will probably be posting around this time everyday because of practices right after school. There is a song mentioned in this chapter. It is "Song For You" by Michael Buble'. EDWARD CHAPTER TOMORROW!**

I had been at the office all Sunday morning. It was my favorite time to be there because no one else came near the office on a Sunday except the die-hards like me, and we stayed out of each other's way. It was a bit eerie how quiet the financial district was on Sunday. Monday through Friday definitely made up for it.

I had come home so I could get ready for my (gulp) date. Vaughn was coming to pick me up in fifteen minutes. I didn't want him coming up to my apartment, so I was meeting him in the lobby. I could feel the nausea rising in my throat. Maybe after all my vain hopes that I would get sick and be able to cancel the date today had finally worked and sub-consciously given me a virulent case of the stomach flu. A mild case of E-Coli wouldn't be bad. Maybe Scarlet Fever.

I didn't want to do this. I hated to feel these feelings again. Getting ready for a date. Knowing he is coming to pick me up. Growing expectations of how the date will go. I never wanted this to happen again. It hurt so much. What if he tried to hold my hand? I only remembered cold hands entwined through mine and I didn't want anyone else's hands to come in and change the memory.

I sometimes wondered if my mind really was like a seive, just as Edward had said. As much as I struggled not to think about him, I did not struggle to forget. My biggest fear was that it would all slip away, and that I would slowly stop remembering. I cursed him frequently for taking his pictures when he left, but part of me knew I would have been looking at them far too often. I could not think of him, but I must not forget him. Forbidden to remember, but terrified to forget, it had been a hard line to walk.

I was pacing around my living room. My hands instinctively wrapped around my waist, trying to tell myself it was just a few hours and then I didn't have to see him again. All too soon, the bell rang and I headed down to the lobby.

I was greeted by that game winning smile. He was wearing faded Levi's that fit him very well. They were baggy in all the right places and were frayed and worn just enough to make him look comfortable. He was wearing low black boots and a black shirt that buttoned up the front with a white T-shirt underneath. The black shirt made his eyes look so dark blue they were almost ocher color. I swallowed hard and looked at his hard muscled arms instead.

An hour later we were walking down a tree lined path that cut through Central Park. Vaughn had just bought us both a pretzel from a cart. It was warm and it tasted good. Children were playing on a nearby playground and there were people sitting on benches that dotted the path. It was a beautiful fall day and the leaves were at the height of their change.

Whenever I saw a leaf changing color, my mind always traveled back to that Fall seven years ago, the Fall from which I have no memory.

Vaughn turned his face to me. "During the season, my life is pretty intense. I had an early morning football meeting, and I need to be at the stadium by 3:00 this afternoon. I hope you don't mind that I didn't plan anything more eventful than walking through Central Park. I just wanted to get to know you, and this seemed like the best way," he explained.

"Football sounds a lot like a business," I said cynically.

He blew out a gust of air. "You're not that far from the truth," he said.

I had lived across from the park for two years and I had never been here, except to run. I don't remember the last time I was outside just for the sake of taking a walk or had looked at a tree. I had worn a light sweater which turned out to be just perfect. I walked with my hands in my pockets. No sense taking any chances. Gradually the conversation began to get more relaxed.

"Thank you again for agreeing to see me today," he said before he popped another bite in his mouth.

"That's the third time you've thanked me," I stated.

"Well, after Friday night at the Mayor's dinner. . ." he laughed and shook his head. "I watched you walk in and you took my breath away." He looked at me and grinned. "I then watched as through the evening you proceeded to decimate every male that attempted to approach you. There were seventeen in all."

"You counted them?" I asked surprised.

"I think you stripped a few of them of their manhood," he grimaced.

I smiled.

"At any rate, it was much more intriguing watching _you_ than that stale, boring party. I was scared to death to approach you myself, but like I said, I would have regretted it for the rest of my life."

He chuckled a little and continued, "Besides, last season in the playoffs I faced the Chicago Bears' entire defensive line and lived to tell the tale, that gave me courage."

He stopped and looked at me. I stopped too. He had more to say, "I still almost left without speaking to you, but then I thought how I watched you shoot down four movie stars, two record producers, a senator, a famous fashion designer, a federal court judge, four players from the Yankees, three Knicks players, and the owner of the Giants, my boss. I figured that If I was defeated at least I would be in good company."

I stared at him for a moment and then started walking again as I said, "Perhaps you misjudged my actions. I was actually doing them a favor saying no. I am no prize, and I am no fun."

He caught up to me and said, "You're no fun? I'm having fun."

I grinned slightly and said, "You're having fun in spite of me, not with me."

He stopped and looked at me again. He popped the last bite of his pretzel into his mouth and while chewing, he grabbed my hand out of my pocket and started leading me off the path and onto the grass. His hand was warm. It was big and strong and I swallowed hard at the memories that started crashing through my wall. I resisted following him and tried to plant my feet. He had swallowed his bite and he turned back and said, "Come ride the merry-go-round with me."

I looked behind him and sure enough, past the trees and through the clearing, there was a merry-go-round. He started gently pulling me again.

"Ride the wha. . .? No, I mean that's ridiculous, it's for little kids," I protested.

He turned to look at me as he continued pulling me along. "Don't you still have any little kid in you? Isn't there a part of you that doesn't want to grow up, that you don't want to get old?"

I slowed down. I closed my eyes against the pain of what he had said. _I did once know a boy who could never get old, and he left me, never to return._

Vaughn could sense something was different. He stopped and looked back at me. "Isabella, are you okay?"

I heard Simmons' voice in my head, "You are alive." I nodded weakly and said softly, "Yes, I'm fine. Let's go."

We rode the merry-go round three times, and I tried very hard to find any part of me that was alive.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Monday morning, Simmons met me at the revolving doors that led into our office towers and said, "Whatever you did to Thomas Vaughn, just keep it up, he was amazing in the game last night!"

I glared at him and snarled over my Starbucks coffee. I'd had a really strange dream the night before. The dream woke me up at 4:00 a.m., and since there was no way I was going back to sleep, I got up and went running. I ran nine miles and I still wasn't able to get the dream out of my head. I wasn't in the mood to talk about Vaughn.

"Good Morning, Ms. Swan." One of my interns was walking by as I headed to my office.

"Grrrrr," Was all I managed to get out.

She flattened herself against the wall and flinched as I stormed by.

Having dreams of unwanted things was not the way to start a Monday morning. I passed my secretary's desk. I was thankful that Sally didn't come in until 8:00. I wasn't in the mood to hear her droning. I went into my office and grabbed a few things off my desk and headed to the Conference Room.

We were having a board meeting today with our primary stockholders. It was always held in the middle of October to look at performance for the past year, and set new goals for the upcoming year. There was no stopping and resting at Berkshire-Hathaway. If you did, those running behind you would just trample you to death.

I walked into the huge conference room and took my seat. I got out my laptop to type down notes even though I had a personal assistant sitting behind me that would take down every word spoken. I didn't trust anyone to get the information that I deemed most important.

Mr. Hathaway walked in and everyone in the room stood up. He received an enthusiastic applause from the stock holders. He deserved the applause. He had made them billions this year. He put out his hand to stop the applause and began his prepared speech.

"I would like to thank everyone for their dedication to the company during this past year. We had unprecedented growth . . . ." He kept talking, but try as I might, I couldn't keep my thoughts away from my dream.

Usually, I dreamed about things in the past. Things I pushed down so hard in my mind that they had no choice but to come out while I was sleeping. So many times I dreamed I was lost, running in the dark with no idea where to go, or which direction to take. But this time, it was completely different.

_I was standing on ice. It was cold and I could see my breath come out as I exhaled. In this dream, I wasn't lost. This time I was desperately trying to run towards someone, but I couldn't move. The ice was so slippery that I stayed in the same spot. My feet kept slipping out from under me every time I tried to stand up. The dream felt so real that I could actually feel the cold, sharp ice pressing into my palms as I put out my hands to catch myself each time I fell. I was desperate to run, to find a certain someone. Then I heard a familiar voice say, "Bella, I love you."_

" . . . And now we come to Ms. Swan." I startled back to reality when I heard my name. Mr. Hathaway moved over so he was standing right behind me. He put a hand on my shoulder and said, "Never in my recollection have I seen so much dedication and tenacity in any one person. I only wish my late partner, Franklin Berkshire could have known her. She has surpassed all expectations I ever had for her, and I am certainly glad that we got her before Baxter, Tubman, & Cohen got their hands on her, or else we would be fearing her today instead of singing her praises."

There was a smattering of polite laughter. I thought he was done because he paused for a moment. Relieved, I slumped back a little into my seat, when all of the sudden he began speaking about me again.

"Some of you in this room know what I am about to say. I have discussed it with all the Chief stockholders and the Chairman of the Board and we are unanimous. As of January 1st of next year, this company will be known not as Berkshire-Hathaway, but as Berkshire-Hathaway-Swan."

Thunderous applause and yells filled the room. I was dumbfounded. My eyes opened wide and my mouth dropped open as what he had said actually sunk in. I was going to have my name on one of the biggest companies in the world. I was going to make many millions a year. I was going to be a player of major proportions. This was the kind of thing that got your picture on the front of the New York Times, Fortune Magazine, Money Magazine, Time and Newsweek. My future was all but set. One more thing, when this was announced, I would be much too busy for any outside interference, there would be no more dating Vaughn or anyone else. I stood up and Mr. Hathaway shook my hand as I raised my fist in the air and yelled, "Yes!" The applause started all over again.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Simmons and I were in Chicago following a lead on "C". After a lot of digging and borderline illegal bribing, we were able to extract some files that showed C- CORP had its beginnings in Chicago.

It appeared that in 1906 "C" had its first purchase of a company dealing with freight cars traveling from Illinois to the Pacific Northwest and on to Alaska. I furrowed my brow as I read over the financial records. There was no doubt that this had been an intelligent man. I knew it was a man because women were not allowed to own or sell property as freely back then. Every transaction, every document, was so wrapped in secrecy. I was equally amazed and frustrated at this mystery man.

In 1920, it seemed that there were two men working together. One was not quite as consistent in his day to day operations as the other. In fact, it seemed that for a period of several years, one of the men was on his own again. Then, in the 1930's and 40's there were at least four men involved. How were they all able to stay so secret?

"Simmons," I said. "One of these men somewhere along the way had to make a phone call from a recorded line, had to use a traceable computer, or speak to a real person that can give us more information." I looked down the list of companies. There were at least 300 companies that these men had dealings with. I had 45 interns at my disposal.

I turned to look at Simmons. "This is our next move." He turned from the mountain of papers in front of him and gave me his full attention. "I want you to divide this list between all of our interns. They will each get roughly 3 companies. I want them to spend at least a month with each one getting by any means necessary the information we are looking for. I don't care if it's a fingerprint on a paper that "C" may have touched, or if someone at the company saw him back in 1972, I want anything they can get."

I was up now and pacing excitedly. I whirled around facing Simmons again. "Tell the interns that to the one that finds the golden clue, I will reward that person when my name goes on the building and they will receive a promotion and salary they can scarcely imagine."

Simmons stared at me with his eyebrows raised. "Golden clue? Are you going to give them a magical chocolate factory too?"

I glared at him. "Just do it!" I growled.

He jumped up and was leaving the room to carry out my wishes when he turned and looked at me again. "So, what's going on between you and Vaughn?"

"Nothing." I muttered.

"You went out with him again, that's pretty big," he said encouragingly.

"I'm not seeing him again," I said with finality.

"Was that your choice or his?"

I had gone out with Vaughn once more after our walk through Central Park. He had taken me on a dinner cruise through the harbor on a yacht. The dinner was lovely, the conversation relaxed and interesting, and he looked very handsome in his tuxedo. We had been slow dancing. The band played music from the 1940's and 50's. We had been talking and smiling when all of the sudden, the band began to play a song that I had heard only once before.

_It was summer. The rain droned on outside as I sat on the couch reading Pride and Prejudice while he played the piano. Suddenly, out of nowhere, he began playing a different melody and started singing to me in his beautiful velvet voice. The words were beautiful and unforgettable. _

_I've been so many places in my life and times_

_I've sung a lot of songs, I've made some bad rhymes._

_I've acted out my life in stages, _

_Been so afraid of people watching,_

_But we're alone now, and I'm singing this song for you._

_ - -_

_I know your image of me is what I hope to be, _

_I've treated you unkindly, but girl can't you see?_

_There's no one more important to me, _

_So darling can't you please just see through me?_

_Cause we're alone now and I'm singing this song for you._

_ - -_

_You taught me precious secrets, _

_The truth withholding nothing, _

_You came out in front when I was hiding._

_But now I'm so much better, _

_So if my words don't come together,_

_Listen to this melody, cause my love is in there hiding._

_ - -_

_I love you in a place where there's no space or time._

_I love you for my life, _

_Because you're the best friend of mine_

_And when my life is over, _

_I'll remember when we were together,_

_We were alone and I was_

_Singing this song for you._

_ - -_

_And when my life is over,_

_I'll remember when we were together, _

_We were alone and I was _

_Singing my song for you._

_The notes were still hanging in the air as he came over to me on the couch. He kissed away the tears that were on my cheek. He tasted one of them. He then took my book gently from my fingers and laid it on the floor as he slowly lowered me down on the couch pressing his lips to mine. _

I tensed up and gritted my teeth. The unhealed gashes in my middle seemed to be throbbing and bleeding. My eyes were glassy and I bit down hard at the emotion and swallowed it. Vaughn never knew what happened, but for me, the evening was over.

I kept up the small talk and smiled when he brought me to the lobby. When he tried to kiss me good-by I turned my head and offered my cheek and hurried to the elevator.

I woke up at 4:00 a.m. and ran ten miles. Vaughn called later that morning. He called twice in the afternoon, again that night, and once more before his game on Sunday. I never answered the phone.

"It was my choice," I barked.

'Well, that would explain his crappy game on Sunday. The coach pulled him out, he didn't even play the fourth quarter."

I glared at Simmons. "Don't make me responsible for how he plays. You're the one responsible for us dating in the first place. You knew exactly how this would turn out."

He nodded knowingly, "Well, I had hoped that he would ignite some little spark inside you."

"I have plenty of spark," I hissed. "Now go get on the phone to the interns before I offer one of them _your_ job."

"You couldn't pay them enough to put up with you," he joked.

I turned and glared. He left.

At least, looking for "C" had given my mind something to think about. I had been devoting all my time to this. It was just what I needed to keep my mind off of him.

This had become a welcome distraction.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

**Please review! I welcome criticisms. I take each one seriously and try to improve my story. EDWARD CHAPTER TOMORROW!**


	4. DISTRACTION

**This is the longest chapter so far. The first part is Edward's POV, and the second is Bella's. See you at the end!**

** - - - - - - - - - - - -**

It was early in the morning, before sunrise. I was sitting on the veranda of my place that I had come to love, in Ireland. The rain was slowly drizzling down. That was nothing new. It rained here almost constantly and the country showed it. It was green rolling hills as far as the eye could see. An improvement of the Brazilian slums, to be sure. I stared at the white capped waves on the ocean just thinking. Always thinking. So much thinking.

I stood up to stretch my legs and clear my head. I had been sitting here most of the night, trying to do what Carlisle had asked of me. Get some direction. Get some purpose back in my life again. Figure out how to be a productive part of the family. I knew that everything he had said was true, I just didn't know how to go about doing it. Purpose, what was my purpose?

I went in the house and took a shower. I had returned from hunting last night and it felt good to get the grime off my body. It was comforting to let the warm water splash off my shoulders. I put my head directly under the spray and closed my eyes. Few things in my life were warm these days.

I turned on CNN to get the morning stock reports and find out the news of the world. Nothing new. Nothing to take my mind off the memories that were always patiently waiting for me to take one out and hold it like a fragile, priceless figurine.

Sometimes seven years seemed like forever, and sometimes it seemed like it had only been a day. When I really let myself fall and just thought about her for days at a time, the memories were so vivid that it seemed like I had just seen her.

I needed to start at a university, perhaps teach for a semester or two. Travel through India. I had never done that. I would do something soon, I just needed a little more time.

It was an ongoing inner conflict to convince myself that I had done the right thing in leaving her. Sometimes I had total conviction in knowing I had done the right thing in giving her a life free from me. Then there were other times I thought I was the stupidest thing there ever was for leaving her. I had walked away from the only being in the whole world, in all the history of time that would ever make me happy, that I would ever love.

I actually went back to her once. I winced as the memory came back to me again. On Bella's twenty-first birthday, I persuaded myself to believe that now that she was older she could make a more mature decision about her future. I thought she would understand why I wanted her to stay human and we could be together.

Actually, I had just spent three years living in the slums of Brazil trying to forget her and had realized it was futile. I just wanted her. Whether it was right or wrong, I just needed her close to me.

I had deluded myself into believing that she would still love me and had been waiting for me to come back to her. Not that I didn't plan on doing a lot of begging. I went back to Forks and drove straight to her house. It was night time and I tried to go in her window, but it was locked. The only way I could get in the window was to break the latch, so I went around the house and used the key to let myself in.

As I walked in, there was a faint scent of Bella, and it rocked me back on my heels. I closed my eyes and was assaulted by a million memories all at once. Watching Bella eat cereal, doing homework at the table, lying on the couch together. I took a breath and noiselessly went upstairs. I walked into her bedroom and she wasn't there. A few things were left scattered on the dresser, and her prehistoric computer and desk remained, but little else. I sat in the rocking chair and stared at her bed. Gran's blanket laid across the bottom. For once, her bed was made.

Where was she? I would find her and do all I could to win her back. What if she had fallen in love with someone else? I thought about the first time I had stole into her room in the night. I could still hear her say my name. I could still feel the electricity that shot through me.

I ended up lying on her bed for the remainder of the night. I buried my face in her sheets and drank in all I could of her scent. It intoxicated me as I held tight to her pillow and let memories of my sanctuary wash over me. All I wanted was to lay beside her in this bed and watch her sleep. I wanted to bury my face in her hair, nestle her close to my chest. I could almost taste her lips on mine.

Before sunrise, I made my way downstairs and saw the pictures she hated on the mantle in the living room. A new one had been added. Her Senior picture. My stomach twisted as I stared. Her eyes were lifeless. She wasn't smiling.

I left the house, and waited until I knew Charlie was up and knocked on the door. He looked the same, except for a slightly larger middle and less hair. He told me that she no longer lived in Forks, but if I ever came to the house she had a message for me.

Charlie, who never invited me in, came back to the door with a sealed envelope and handed it to me as he said coldly, "She never really thought you would come back, but this has been waiting for you just in case." I couldn't wait to read what it said. I ripped the letter open right in front of Charlie. It read:

_I have moved on. Don't look for me, don't follow me, and do not under any circumstances come into my room at night. _

_Bella _

I took a moment to compose myself, then I looked up at Charlie and said, "Please don't tell Bella I was ever here."

I could tell by his thoughts that it was very clear he never wanted me in Bella's life again. In his cold voice he said, "Oh, don't worry Edward, I won't."

I then drove out of her driveway for the last time.

Her birthday was a month ago. She was now twenty-five. I couldn't imagine how beautiful she had become. She would never want a seventeen year old vampire now. I knew she would be building a great life. Maybe she had a career . . . perhaps married, children. I closed my eyes against the familiar pain.

I was jolted back to the present by a voice in my head. _Edward,_ _I am coming to see you_. It was Carlisle. Why would he come all the way to Ireland? I wondered if something terrible had happened that he didn't want to tell me over the phone. Had something happened to a member of the family? What if he found out that something had happened to Bella? I would never forgive myself for that. But then, maybe that would finally give me the courage to do what I should have done all along, just go to the damned Volturi and get it over with. Find a way to be with her in the next world.

A few minutes later, I saw Carlisle's car turn up the drive. I waited expectantly at the front door. _Everyone is fine, Edward. I just came_ _to discuss something with you_. I relaxed. Carlisle knew me so well. He didn't need a mind reading gift to know what I was thinking.

He came in and embraced me. He smiled. _You look good_.

"Thank you," I said.

We talked about the family and he caught me up on everything they had been doing. But, before long he cleared his throat and said, "Edward, I have some important matters of business that need to be dealt with, and I believe you are the best man for the job."

When he came into the house, he had been carrying a briefcase, but I had not questioned him as to what was in it. Now, he opened it up and handed me a paper. Across the top was a letterhead from a business called Berkshire-Hathaway. I had heard of them. They were a head hunting company that specialized in company mergers and buy outs. They were at the top of the food chain. I put down the paper and glanced at Carlisle and he said, "This is a memo we happened to get a hold of. Read it, we've got trouble."

I read the document quickly. It was written to a group of interns and they were given an assignment. Find out the secret behind C- CORP and who their financial backers were. The memo referred to the mysterious person as "C". They were given free reign and encouraged to use any means necessary to find out the secret identity behind the company. They were to spend at least a month investigating each company that had dealings with C- CORP, and the one who succeeding in exposing who actually owned the company would receive a fantastic promotion. It was signed by M. Simmons. I put down the paper and looked up at Carlisle.

"We knew this would happen eventually, why don't we put up fake players to pose as us and let the whole thing drop?" I asked.

"I thought of that," Carlisle stated. "But the reason it won't work is because they are not trying to find us to make financial deals. I should have been more aware. This firm has been buying shares to our companies in small enough quantities that it didn't merit our attention. Alice wasn't alerted until they had acquired close to a majority. They are close to getting 51 and when they do they will begin proceedings for a hostile takeover and they will break the companies apart and sell them to whomever bids the highest."

I raised my eyebrow. Carlisle had been building this company long before he met me. It meant something to him, and as he brought each one of us into the family it had come to mean something to us. He had taught us and trained us and together we had built something significant and lasting. This money meant freedom for us, and stability. It assured that we did not have to depend on anyone. I would let this company be taken from us over my dead body. So, that meant there was not a chance in hell I would let it happen.

"What do you want me to do?" I offered. I would do anything he asked of me.

He looked at me with his wise, golden eyes. "I believe that out of all my sons you are the most equipped to handle this challenge. I would go myself, but I have lectures set at universities throughout the fall, and I start my new position in November. I could cancel it all . ."

I didn't let him finish. I had let him pull the weight of our family without my help for too long. I could do this.

"I will go Carlisle. Do not worry, I won't let you down."

Carlisle breathed a sigh of relief. "Please keep me informed as to all that is happening. I will come if you need me." He gestured at the briefcase. "That is full of all the information I have been able to get on Berkshire-Hathaway and the Simmons character who wrote the memo. Your brothers and sisters say they will help out any way they can. Let me know if you need anything else."

"I will take it from here," I said confidently.

We stood up and he embraced me. "I love you and I am proud of you," he stated.

I swallowed the emotion. I hadn't done a lot to make anyone proud of me as of late, but I would not fail him on this.

After Carlisle's car turned on to the main road, I sat down and got right to work. I would find out all I could about this attempted corporate merger and shut them down. I smiled. This was a welcome distraction. This was just what I needed, for a small while, to get my mind off of Bella.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I spent four days learning everything I could about Berkshire-Hathaway. Carlisle had the names of only the top three positions in the company. I decided that was prudent. There was no need to learn the names of anyone else. I spent most of my time learning about the living partner, Sterling Hathaway, and his philosophy about business. He was as old school and ruthless as they came.

He was a take no prisoners kind of guy and he surrounded himself with people that had the same philosophy. I studied his employers and found a Simmons on the list. He wasn't listed as very high on the totem pole, I was concerned that my information wasn't completely up to date. I checked my sources. It was three months old. Things moved fast in the corporate world, but this was good enough, and all I had to go on, anyway.

The phone rang, it would be the conference call I had been expecting. We had a team of lawyers at our disposal that handled all our legal dealings and they were paid well to keep complete silence on all our matters. They had never let us down. I had been on the phone with them everyday since Carlisle gave me the assignment.

Harry Banks, from Banks, Cranston, & Parsons began the meeting.

"Mr. Cullen, we have new information and I want to make you understand the seriousness of the situation. I have handled two other clients that came under Berkshire-Hathaway's radar, the first, we succeeded in stopping the buy-out, the second, we were not so lucky."

Harry sighed hard. "We knew it all hinged on who was handling the matter, and it's not good news, no, not good news at all."

I stood up and began to walk around with the phone. "I believe I have this Simmons character all figured out. He is impressive that's true, but not anything we can't handle."

Mr. Banks paused a moment and then said, "Mr. Cullen, I believe you have been operating under a false assumption. Simmons is the assistant. He carries out the orders for his boss, and let me tell you, she's . . ."

"She?" I questioned. I didn't remember seeing any woman close to the top rungs of the ladder at Berkshire-Hathaway.

"Well," said Banks," She is a woman in a matter of speaking. More of a she-devil if you ask me."

"What is her name?" I asked. I could hear lawyers in the room laughing.

"Her name is not important," said Banks. "All you need to know is that everyone that has ever dealt with her and lived to tell the tale calls her the 'Bitch in Heels.' She is ruthless, Mr. Cullen. She is the best I've ever seen. She is the new Vice President of the company. She pushed out Terrence Morgan, who had been with the company for 35 years. She is young and beautiful and she uses it to her full advantage as she draws you in and dazzles you, then before you know it, it's too late. Her venom is running through your system and you're a goner. Rumor has it that at the first of the year her name will be up on the building right after Hathaway's."

Banks paused for a moment and said, "She has never lost."

I, on the other hand, felt much better about things. Knowing I was going to deal with a woman changed everything a great deal. A young and beautiful one only made things a little more interesting. I did not particularly enjoy using my "gifts" to lure in the female species, but I had to admit that when I needed to use it, I was, for lack of a better word, lethal.

And I had never lost.

"Harry," I began, "May I ask you, sir, are there any gatherings or parties planned for this next weekend that this ah, 'you know what in heels' would be attending?" This was New York City. It was a given that there would be a party.

He chuckled and said, "As a matter of fact, a huge gathering sponsored by the State Department is planned at the Waldorf Astoria for November 9th, this Friday. It's purpose is to welcome the new Chancellor of Germany. Berkshire-Hathaway has substantial holdings in Berlin and she is almost sure to be there."

This was going to be all too easy.

"Thank you gentleman for your time," I said. "I will be in town by the weekend, and will contact you to meet personally. Please, let me know if you hear anything else, otherwise, I expect you to stay on complete secrecy on this." They readily agreed. They were paid rather well for their silence and didn't want to jeopardize our business. I was in much higher spirits after talking to them.

I decided it would be a good idea for Jasper to meet me in New York City. I might need him to work his magic in the boardroom, if it even got that far. He was lonely anyway, since Alice was visiting friends in Denali. I did a little homework and got Jasper and I invited to that party on Friday. On the off chance she wouldn't be there, I sent a personal invitation to the "she-devil's" building just in case, and addressed it to the Vice President. Her name was of no importance to me.

I called in an order to an upscale florist and went online to make a purchase at Tiffany's. I then called a reliable courier service. Oh yes, I thought. Everything would go just fine. I had never met a woman who didn't fall for gifts and intrigue. Well, there was one woman I knew that was never Impressed by them, but I wasn't going to think about her right now.

I checked the weather report for the weekend. A cold front was moving in. Lots of rain. Lots of clouds. For once, everything was working out exactly according to plan.

**(Bella's POV)**

It had been two weeks since project "C" with the interns began. I had never seen so much back-biting, brown nosing, and all out war in all my life. I was very proud of them. There was no way these interns were going to let me down.

I was going to win.

If nothing else, C- CORP was now alerted that I was on to them. That meant they were probably also looking into who had bought up a near majority of the shares of their stock. We were up to 48 percent of the ownership of the shares. The last 3 percent, however, was always the hardest. It never came without drawing blood.

Soon, I would hear from some law firm that was trying to hide the desperation in their voice. Whenever a company was warned I was looking at them, a batch of lawyers were usually sent to my office within twenty four hours to ward off the attack. This company had to be shaking in its boots. I loved the smell of fear. It was my favorite scent.

That next Monday, I received an invitation to a party being held at the Waldorf Astoria, one of the finest and most expensive hotels in the world. I knewit well. It was down two blocks from me on Fifth Avenue. The invitation was engraved on very fine paper. It was not addressed to me by name, but to the Vice President. My presence was "requested" that Friday to discuss an important matter of business.

I turned the invitation over in my hands wondering who and what this was all about. I brought in Sally and she told me that it was delivered by courier that morning, and was told to lay it on my desk.

I groaned. Not another party. I knew about the party this Friday. It was to be a large and grand affair. The President of the United States would be in attendance, as well as foreign leaders and dignitaries to honor the visit of the new Chancellor of Germany. I had already been invited, I didn't understand the additional invitation. Last week, I told Simmons to go without me. I didn't want any more parties for a while.

Two days later, I received the largest bouquet of flowers known to mankind. The letter read,

_I am anxious for our meeting. I will be in the ballroom at 8:00 p.m. I assure you this business will be pleasant and extremely beneficial to you_.

There was no signature. I did not like playing games. Chances were the person who sent the flowers did not have "business" on their mind. It wouldn't be the first time. I threw the letter away and gave the flowers to Simmons with the suggestion he give them to his supermodel of the week. My mind did not change about the party.

Two days later, on Friday, I had meetings from 7:00 to 10:00 in the morning. I knew there would a mountain of things waiting for me on my desk when I got to my office, but they were all forgotten when I walked in and saw a small blue box sitting on my desk. I recognized the color of the box, it was from Tiffany's.

I opened it and inside was a broach. I didn't usually wear broaches, but this one was lovely. It was in the shape of a rose and was only about a half inch in diameter. It was encrusted completely in rubies. There was a card in the bottom of the box that read,

_I am still counting on you being at the party tonight. I assure you this meeting will be beneficial to us both. 8:00 in the ballroom._

_C_

It was signed "C".

I just about went into coronary arrest right there at my desk.

"Sally!" I screamed. She came running in breathlessly. I met her at my door.

"How did this box get on my desk?" I cried.

She stared at me with wide eyes. "The same courier that brought the invitation and flowers delivered it earlier this morning."

I was clutching the letter in my hands. I didn't realize I had mangled it into a ball.

"Sally, get Simmons in here, now!" I ran back to my desk. All our work had paid off, we had flushed out the mysterious "C". Everything else could wait. Tonight, I was going to a party.

- - - - - - - - -

I was madly pacing around my office when Simmons came bolting in.

"What's wrong?" He was out of breath.

I held up the mangled note and the broach and he stared at me in bewilderment. "Remember the personal invitation and flowers I got this week?" I asked.

"Yeah . . . " He was still confused.

I straightened out the note with shaking fingers and said, "They are all from 'C'".

Simmons snatched the note from my hand and his eyes widened. "Simmons, I am definitely going to that party tonight," I said forcefully.

I put my hands on each of his shoulders and said, "Now, more then ever, I need something, anything, I can use to gain the upper hand when I confront "C" tonight. By now, he probably even knows what brand of lipstick I wear. I know absolutely nothing about him."

Simmons looked up at me and smiled. "Don't worry, we'll find something." He turned to leave, and stopped. He turned back and said, "I knew we'd flush him out. We'll get him."

I nodded my head confidently and turned to get my purse. I was on my way to do something so painful that it proved all the more how much I wanted to win this battle. I was going to the salon for my hair and shopping for a killer dress.

I made an appointment for 4:00 p.m. at the salon and paid dearly for it. These guys were always booked out months in advance, but wisely left a few appointments open on the weekends for those desperate and rich clients that just had to get in. I was desperate and thankfully rich.

I headed to the boutique where I usually got my dresses for events such as this. Lola, the owner, always knew what looked best on me. I walked in and she could tell by the look on my face that this was important.

"Lola," I breathed. "I have asked for dresses before, but this time, I need something special. I need to be a knock-out tonight."

She stared at me with her eyebrows raised. "Tonight must be special. You have never cared so much. You actually look nervous."

"Just work your magic, Lola." I begged.

She turned to look at me as she walked, "With you it is not a matter of magic, but putting it all together for the desired effect." We stopped and looked at the dresses.

"All right," said Lola. "What is the desired effect, that he will fall in love with you, I hope," she said with a smile on her face.

"Love?" I choked. "No, I mean absolutely not. I am not looking for this man to fall in love with me, I am looking to stun him in submission. I am going for "operation shock and awe."

She laughed and said, "Okay then, let's get started."

We spent the next few hours trying on many different dresses; all beautiful, but none exactly right. The hour was growing later.

I saw her looking at me with one finger tapping her jaw and her eyes narrowed as she said, "We got a shipment in today and my girls are probably just finishing unpacking it. There was supposed to be a vintage Valentino in the order. Let me go check."

I was struggling out of the shoes that I had tried on with the last dress when she walked out smiling, holding a dark blue dress in her hands. I could tell as soon as I saw it that it was what I had been looking for. I was smiling as I took it into the dressing room. When I walked out, she began to clap.

The dress was made of a rough satin material that held tight to my body all the way down to the middle of my calves where it flared out just enough to make me look even slimmer than I was. The bodice was very tight and form fitting and the arms were made of the same color blue but they were a stretchy, see through material that started just barely on my shoulders and clung to my arms all the way down to my wrists. The back of my dress had the same see through net material that went down all the way to the small of my back. At the waist, the satin gathered just off center in the back and created a bit of a bustle making me look extremely curvy and slim.

"Stay right there," Lola said.

She came back holding a necklace and she put it up to my neck. It was a choker on a dainty silver chain holding a Sapphire in the shape of a teardrop. It was perfect. She also had matching Sapphire teardrop earrings.

"You did it again, Lola," I breathed.

"No, _you_ did it Bella," she smiled. She put her hand on my shoulder and said, "This is definitely shock and awe."

Two hours later, with my hair and make-up done, I took a taxi home to get dressed. I fussed and pushed my way into the dress and stood in front of my mirror, staring at myself. I took a deep breath, and let it out slowly. The salon had curled my hair and then put it in a loose ponytail with a few loose tendrils hanging down. It just matched the dress and the earrings. I looked beautiful. But it didn't matter. What good was it to go to the party tonight just to dazzle someone into submission? If Edward could see me tonight, would he love me then?

I imagined him staring at me in this dress with his hypnotic topaz eyes and telling me how beautiful he thought I looked. I imagined him telling me he loved me. That was all I ever wanted.

Why did I push away every other suitor? I knew why.

I was afraid I would never feel it again. Never again know what it felt like to be in the arms of someone I truly loved. That when you were with him, you were left breathless, and it was the only place in the world you wanted to be. It was better to not even try. I had chosen to stay far away from any chance at a relationship than to think that I would be 92 years old and still trying to get back true love that was lost to me.

I already knew the end of this story. True love didn't happen twice. I would always be alone. A distant second was so distasteful to me that I could scarcely even think it.

So, I looked beautiful tonight even though Edward would never see me. He would never see me or love me again. This was all just a masquerade to make it through this thing called a life. I attached the small ruby broach to my chest, turned out the light, and headed to the party.

- - - - - - - - - -

Okay, we all know what happens tomorrow, right? Tomorrow's chapter is titled: Second Sight. See you then!


	5. SECOND SIGHT

**First of all, thank you so much for reviewing. There are SO MANY stories on this site, and the fact that anyone would want to read mine, is well . . . pretty freakin' cool. I don't know what it is with me.**

**I have never explained why Bella calls Thomas Vaughn, just "Vaughn". Alias is my favorite show of all time, and Sydney Bristow called her love/partner on the show "Vaughn" instead of Michael Vaughn. (He was played by the very beautiful Michael Vartan). I always wanted to use it in a story. **

**I am worried about this chapter. I can't tell you how many times I've read it. I wanted to make sure that you got both reactions at the same time, or as close to the same time as possible. In other words, I didn't want to take Edward's whole take on the evening, and then Bella's whole take on the evening. Boring and redundant. So, I hope this works out. I have Edward, then Bella, then Edward again. **

**See ya at the end!**

**(Edward's POV)**

I was standing in my tuxedo and looking out the hotel window at Central Park. I waited while Jasper messed with his tie. All the people in this city made me slightly anxious. I hadn't been around this many people in a long time. I had hunted last night before leaving Ireland, but I knew if this took long, Jasper and I would have to leave for Upstate where their was plentiful wildlife. I took a deep breath. At least if I had to be in New York, Fifth Avenue was the place to be.

The dinner had started at 7:00, but Jasper and I, for obvious reasons, were arriving after the dinner was over. Also, I didn't really care to sit around a table making small talk with pompous individuals and smiling politicians.

The night was pleasantly cool. The sidewalks were wet from the recent rain, and had washed the ever present grime from the streets. Our hotel wasn't far from the Waldorf, so we decided to walk. Fifth Avenue was full of action, with honking taxis and people out on the town. Limousines were lined up all along the street. I glanced sideways at Jasper. It was good to see him again. He had come as soon as I called him. His thoughts were so much calmer than I remembered.

"You know, Jasper," I said as we walked. "Your restraint has improved considerably in the last several years. I'm sorry I haven't been around much to notice it."

Jasper smiled and said proudly, "Thank you. I have been working very hard at it, and I am feeling much more confident about myself." He glanced quickly at me and said, "Alice has been a tremendous help. I don't know what I'd do without her. She really misses you."

I sighed deeply. "Jasper, I couldn't take all the looks and her sneaky way of giving me updates on Bella every time we had a conversation. No one had to tell me what I was doing. I was fully aware of my choice . . . and its consequences." I felt my insides seize with familiar pain.

Jasper laughed slightly. "I am aware of the tenacity bottled up in that tiny body, but Edward, she has only your best interests in mind. And Bella's."

I swallowed the anger and frustration. I did not want to lash out at Jasper. I spoke calmly as I said, "Jasper, to put it mildly . . . having Bella with me, well that ship has sailed. It is out of the harbor, somewhere lost and sunk in the deepest part of the ocean never to be seen or heard from again. Please, don't bring it up anymore, okay?" Jasper began to say something, I could read what his mind was thinking and I interrupted him.

"Look, it's not your fault. That night was just a precursor to what our lives would have been. Bella was not meant to be part of my world. I saw her, I wanted her, I took her. This is my fault, Jasper. No one is at fault here but me."

Jasper looked at me and said, "Alice seemed pretty excited about something when she called today from Denali. She wouldn't tell me what it was, but I know it had something to do with you."

I chuckled. "Well, let's hope she saw us putting an end to this ugly situation in one night." He smiled encouragingly. I stopped walking and said, "Look, I know that I hurt Bella. But I am sure that she is long over it by now. I am sure that she is living the life she was meant to live. I am sure that she is happy and sees her future before her and is probably even grateful that I let her go." I cleared my throat and said, "I am sure she hardly ever thinks of me."

Jasper could feel that I was in terrible pain. His eyes tightened as he looked at me. "We're here for you, Edward," he said with sincerity. I nodded my head, not sure of my voice, and began walking again.

The closer we came to the Hotel, the thicker the crowds became. Many were not going to the party, they were just standing outside in the hopes of catching a glimpse of the President. We slowly pushed our way through the crowds. There was considerable security and they were checking everyone to make sure that their invitations were legitimate. We then had to pass through metal detectors and wand searches. Jasper and I had finally made our way through the hotel and into the lobby just outside the ballroom. I scanned the crowd just in case this woman happened to be looking for me. I saw no one matching Harry Banks' description of young and beautiful. Suddenly, Jasper's eyes narrowed.

"Isn't that Sterling Hathaway?" he asked.

I followed his gaze and saw a man with a drink in his hand talking to another who was smoking a cigarette. Jasper and I had been reading a recent article on him from Business Weekly. His picture had been on the front cover. I nodded and said, "Yes, it is him."

Jasper grinned and said, "It's time to earn my keep, I am going over there and talk to him and see if I can't find out more about our little mystery woman you are meeting here tonight."

I slapped him on the back and said, "That's a great idea. Go right ahead."

I was able to watch for a time and listen in on their conversation but the crowd gradually became thicker and thicker. The dinner must be about over. Many were spilling out of the ballroom to refresh their drink, or make small talk. I glanced at my watch and saw that it was 7:50. I did not want to appear over anxious. I decided I would wait five minutes before I entered the ballroom.

There were loud noises and voices happening all around me and it was increasingly more difficult to focus on just Jasper. I tried to be nonchalant as I looked at each woman's dress for the ruby broach. It was hard not to be confident and optimistic about my chances of ending all this in one night. I reasoned I would probably need to do little else than look into her eyes and dance with her. I was anticipating my phone call to Carlisle and the pride and relief I would hear in his voice. I checked my watch. It was 7:55. It was showtime. I would have to go in with or without Jasper.

I began gliding past people to walk into the ballroom. Suddenly, Jasper caught up to me and his eyes were wide. I felt panic as I misunderstood his look to mean he was thirsty. But then he began to speak.

"Edward, there is um, a slight complication."

"What do you mean?" I questioned.

We were still walking into the ballroom as he said, "This woman you are meeting tonight, Hathaway gave me her name and well, Edward . . . you already know her."

I raised my eyebrows. I was surprised. I had never had any friendships, or relationships for that matter, with any females . . .except . . . at the same moment I heard Jasper's thoughts, we stepped into the ballroom and from up above me I was hit with that terrible, wonderful scent I never thought I would experience again. My throat burned and I painfully swallowed back the venom. How could this be? Bella was the woman Harry Banks had been talking about? My stomach tightened in painful spasms as I looked up and saw her and breathed out her name.

"Bella."

**(Bella's Pov)**

It was just before 7:00 p.m. when Simmons and I made our way into the ballroom. This was a huge event. I was glad that I came if just for the networking if nothing else. I had already talked to two clients and made an appointment with a third.

"You know Bella," Simmons moved his head towards my ear so no one else could hear him. "You really do look absolutely ravishing. You went above and beyond for tonight. This "C" guy doesn't stand a chance." His face was a little red from his comment.

I looked at him surprisingly. He had never said anything like that to me.

He smiled and said, "Hey, I am a guy, you know. You hired me because I am extremely talented at seeing the obvious."

"So, where is your date?" I teased. It wasn't like him to show up to a party such as this without a date.

He smiled wickedly. "Well, Giselle is planning on meeting me. We couldn't come together, there is way too much paparazzi here. I would soon be dubbed, "Giselle's new man" on the front of STAR magazine."

I nodded my head, like I knew what the heck STAR magazine was.

His phone rang. When he saw who it was, he swallowed nervously and put up his finger to tell me he'd be back in a moment and moved away from me to talk. He came back a few moments later and I questioned him as to who he had been talking to. He shrugged it off and said we should go to our table.

There were tables spread all throughout the ballroom. Our particular seats were at the top of the grand staircase and over to the right. Most of the guests were already taking their seats, and our table was nearly full when we arrived and introduced ourselves. It all added up to boring. The Senate Minority leader and his wife, a Senator from Tennessee, and the ambassador of Greece. Nobody that I cared to know further. We heard a large commotion down on the floor and realized that someone of importance must have just arrived. I didn't care about any important person tonight except "C".

I felt someone standing beside me and I looked up from the table. I was shocked to see Vaughn standing in front of me.

"Hello," he said with a nervous smile.

Simmons stood up and said, "Thomas, it's great to see you again. So, where are you sitting?"

Vaughn smiled and said, "I believe this is my table right here. I looked down at the place cards, and sure enough, seated right next to me in lovely cursive lettering was the name, "Thomas Vaughn".

Simmons looked at Vaughn in innocent surprise. "You don't say? Well, isn't that a coincidence. Wouldn't you say so Bella?"

I was shooting daggers at Simmons face. If looks could kill, he would be lying on the floor right now with his tongue hanging out of his mouth.

Simmons swallowed hard and in a shaky voice said, "It looks as if dinner is about to start, shall we all sit down?"

When we were seated, Vaughn leaned over and whispered, "I knew you would be at this party. This was all my idea. I bribed your assistant to tell me what table you were at so that I could strategically place myself beside you."

"And what was the bribe?" I asked dryly.

"Tickets on the 50 yard line for the next three games," he smiled.

So Simmons had a price for selling me out. Good to know.

"I actually thought I'd end up at this party alone. All week long, Simmons has been telling me you weren't coming," he said.

"Yes, well . . . I received a little motivation today," I said flatly.

"You look amazing," he said breathlessly.

"Thank you," I replied.

They began serving dinner then and the conversation turned to small talk. I tried mightily to include the others seated at our table so that Vaughn could never create a private conversation between just the two of us. I kept nervously checking my watch. It was now 7:45.

"You seem on edge about something," Vaughn said. "I hope that my plan of sitting next to you has not made you uncomfortable."

I shook my head as I sighed. "No, Vaughn, it's not you. I am meeting a very important person to discuss a very important business deal in about 15 minutes. I have never met him before and I know absolutely nothing about him, and I am just a little on edge."

I wanted to go the bathroom to freshen up before I talked with "C". "Would you excuse me for a moment?" I said as I stood up.

Vaughn stood up with me and smiled. "Sure," he said.

Once in the bathroom, I checked myself over. I looked at my hair and make-up and nervously assured myself there was nothing in my teeth. Then, I started pacing around the bathroom. This was a big moment for me. I got some strange looks as I stood in front of the mirror and gave myself the "killer" pep talk, but it helped me clear my head. My instincts were kicking in.

"Showtime," I muttered.

I straightened the broach, then headed out to the ballroom. I checked my watch, it was still a few minutes before 8:00. I stopped before reaching my table and looked out over the railing scanning the crowd and the dance floor for a sign of this mystery man. Suddenly, I noticed Vaughn had come and stood beside me.

"Bella," he looked at me intently. "Before you go to meet your business associate, I need to talk to you." He licked his lips nervously and said, "I am not used to being put in the position of the pursuer. Not that I mind, but I am just not used to having to work so hard to get to know someone I am interested in, and I am definitely interested in you. I am probably handling this all wrong, but I am not giving up on the possibility of us yet."

He then reached into his inside suit pocket and pulled out a long blue box. Another Tiffany box. Two in one day. Unbelievable. I started to stutter and stammer. I felt very uncomfortable about this. He put a finger on my lips and said, "Bella, relax, it's not that bad."

He opened the box and pulled out a bracelet. It was a silver chain that was very shiny and thin. On it was a charm. I fingered the charm and saw that it was a carousel horse. It was covered in diamonds.

He began speaking as he put the bracelet on my wrist. "This is a reminder of our first date. I couldn't find a yacht, but I haven't given up looking." He took his finger and put it under my chin and lifted it up so I was looking at him. "I want to fill this bracelet with charms of all our dates. Then, I will buy you another bracelet and fill that one up too. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

I swallowed hard. I didn't know what to say. I opened my mouth to make an attempt at something intelligent when Simmons came running up to me breathless.

"Bella, an intern just called, it's not big, but you said you wanted to know about any lead. The intern found a record of a phone call from C- CORP to a business in France made eight years ago. The phone call was traced to a little hospital in Northern Washington."

My eyes narrowed. "What was the name of the hospital?" I breathed.

"Forks Hospital," he answered.

I reeled back. I blinked at the shock. My mind was racing. All of the sudden everything made sense. My pulse was thudding hard in my ears as it all came together. The "C" was for Cullen. The business was started in the early 1900's, all the money . . .the secrecy . . .why had I not realized it before? I was trying so hard not to think about him, that I completely disregarded the most obvious person . . . I heard a strange wheezing sound, and then realized it was me. I felt my chest tighten. Then I froze as I thought of something that made the room begin to spin. Without thinking, my hands wrapped in a vice grip around my middle.

Who was sent here to meet me?

I whirled around and wildly and frantically began searching the ballroom for the topaz eyes I used to know so well. My breath was coming too fast. I couldn't fill my lungs with enough air. My hands were tightly gripping the railing, and I could feel myself begin to shake. Somewhere far away I could hear Simmons calling my name.

Then, I saw him.

My eyes rested on the bronze hair and the excruciatingly lovely face. My dreams had not remembered his beauty anywhere near well enough. I was tormented infinitely more by the original. It was Edward. His pale skin had a gentle radiance against his dark tuxedo, and his eyes bore into me, even though he was 30 feet away. He was halfway up the stairs. I tried to shake my head and tell him not to come any closer. I tried, but I was frozen, rigid, mesmerized.

He was almost to the top of the stairs now. His eyes never left me, and he was getting closer. I had done all I could to forget. I had told myself countless times that I would never see him again. Yet, here he was, after seven years, standing right in front of me, staring directly at me.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

**(Edward's Pov)**

I was standing in the doorway to the ballroom when I looked up and saw Bella. She was at the railing looking out at the crowd. She was wearing the ruby broach.

I exhaled sharply. She was a vision. I remembered her as an eighteen year old girl, but she had grown into a ravishing, incredibly breathtaking woman. Jasper grabbed my arm.

"Edward, are you okay?"

I couldn't swallow. I couldn't speak. I just stared up at her. After seven years, my reason for existing was mere feet from me. Suddenly, there was someone standing beside her. He was a large man, with striking black hair who looked to be about her age. My chest felt very heavy. Was this her husband?

He began speaking to her and I could tell in his eyes that he cared for her. I tuned out everything else in the room and listened to what he was saying.

"_I am not giving up on the possibility of us just yet."_

What did that mean?

Then he put his finger on her lips and pulled out a box. A box from Tiffany's. I could tell right away, with great relief, that it wasn't a ring box. But, as he pulled out a bracelet he talked about their first date and all the dates he wanted to have with her in the future. For one brief second, I tried to turn and run away from her. But I knew, now that I had seen her, there was not a chance I would be able to do it. I couldn't take it another second. I had to get to her. I began walking as slowly as I could manage up the stairs.

Jasper caught up to me and whispered, "What are you going to do? What are you going to say?"

I knew what I wanted to say, _"Bella I love you. I have loved you every moment we've been apart." _

"I don't know," I admitted.

The dark haired gentleman wanted more from their relationship. He was waiting for Bella to reply. It seemed like hours while he and I both waited for her answer.

Suddenly, another man hastily joined them. He began talking to Bella about an intern finding a phone record of a call Carlisle made several years ago from Forks hospital to one of our companies in France. He was usually so careful. Now, Bella had to know who "C" was.

I saw her whip around and begin madly searching the crowd. Her face . . .I expected to see anger, but instead I saw fear. _Here I am, Bella. Look this way_, I pleaded. And then there were those dark pools I got lost in so many times, she was looking at me.

Without another thought I finished climbing the stairs and walked to her. She backed up a step and again, I could see fear. Her heart was flying. Not since that first day in Biology so long ago, had she ever looked on me in fear. But, I realized this was a different kind of fear. It was mixed with hurt and betrayal. The closer I got, the stronger her scent became. I momentarily closed my eyes as I let it wash over me. How I longed to hold her close and let my mouth linger behind her ear and touch her face. I wanted to take her somewhere, alone. Just the two of us and tell her everything that had been burning inside me for the last seven years. I was almost to her now. I swallowed and looked into the eyes of my love and said, "Hello Bella."

She stood there with her teeth clenched. I could see her jaw working under the tension. Suddenly, there was a calm resting over the group and I saw her glance at Jasper. When she looked back at me her eyes were glassy and I balled my fists to keep from reaching out to her.

"Hello Edward." It had been so long since I had heard her voice anywhere but in my memories.

The man beside her cleared his throat and said, "Bella, do you want to introduce these gentlemen?"

She was grasping the rail so tightly, that her knuckles were white and her veins were showing.

Her voice was thick as she said, "This is my assistant Michael Simmons, and this," she looked towards us, "is Jasper Hale. . . . and this is Edward Cullen." She looked at Simmons and said, "This is "C."

Simmons blinked in surprise. His thoughts told me he was equally shocked that not only was I a young man, but that Bella already knew me. His mind raced as he struggled to assess how big of a threat we would be. How strong an adversary he was now up against. But, he mostly seemed shocked at the way Bella was acting. Apparently, he had never seen her show this type of emotion.

The thoughts of the large dark haired man in the group invaded my mind. I scrutinized his face. I must admit, I was not in any mood to hear how this gentleman felt about Bella. He was staring at me with a look of contempt.

Jasper put his hand out to him, since no one in the group had introduced him. "Hello," he said.

The man shook Jasper's hand and nodded his head once sharply and said, "Thomas Vaughn."

Jasper smiled and said, "Oh sure, I recognize you now, I am a big fan."

I glanced sideways at Jasper. So this guy was in love with Bella _and_ famous. Great.

We stood there in an uncomfortable silence. I couldn't take my eyes off Bella. She was looking anywhere but at me. Finally, Simmons said, "Well, Ms. Swan, I believe you and Mr. "C", uh. . . Cullen have important matters to discuss."

I nodded my head in agreement and looked at her expectantly. "Um," she swallowed hard and cleared her throat as she motioned to the back of the room. "There is a small parlor off the ballroom over there."

She looked at Jasper expectantly and said, "Will you be joining us?" She looked as if she was pleading for him to come. If Jasper had any sense of self-preservation he knew what his answer should be.

"Oh, no. You go ahead. I'll be getting better acquainted with Michael and Thomas." He looked at me and then began walking off with the two men.

I walked up to her and said, "Shall we?"

She turned and I put my hand on the small of her back to guide her into the room. She bristled and moved to the side out of my reach. I struggled to keep my face impassive, and not show how much that hurt me. We walked into the parlor in silence.

Once inside, she moved about five feet away with her back to me and folded her arms. I saw her take a large breath and when she turned to look at me, there was no longer fear in her eyes. She stared me in the face and said, "Was this some kind of joke? Why even go through all the pretense of the flowers and the pin. Were you trying to dazzle me?" When she said the word dazzle she rolled her eyes and looked disgusted.

"No, Bella." I was shaking my head. "I had absolutely no idea who I was meeting tonight until I saw you at the top of the stairs."

She did not believe a word I was saying. This dress that she was wearing was however, dazzling and distracting _me_ a great deal. It clung to her waist and hips, and her arms and back were made of a translucent material that showed her beautiful skin. It was just the color blue I had always loved her in most. Her hair was pulled back showing me her lovely neck. I could see her blood drumming, pulsating in a hard rhythmic beat and I had to swallow down the venom and the passion at the same time. The passion was much more painful to push away. The color on her lips was a deep red and made my mouth water for her. I wanted to take her in my arms and make us both forget the last seven years apart. Instead, I used all my hard earned discipline and restraint to calm myself and answer her question.

"I have only known about all this for about a week. Carlisle visited me and asked me if I would deal with this." I chuckled a bit and said, "I never saw your name on one document, and the lawyers had another name for you, I truly am as blown away as you are."

I breathed hard and said, "Bella, I am so glad it was you."

She whirled around and said, "Is it because you think I will just drop all of this because we had a high school romance?

Is that all she thought it was?

"No," I stammered, "I am just so happy to see you again. I have missed you so much. Bella, you look so beautiful."

Her hands were in fists, she bit her lip and in a hushed whisper said, "You're not going to do this to me again. This doesn't change anything."

This conversation was taking a turn that I wasn't ready for. I just wanted to talk about us. I wanted to find out if there was a chance for me. I was blown away by the lovely creature standing in front of me.

"Bella, how have you been?" I took a tentative step towards her. "I think about you so often. I had no idea that you were living in New York City and that you were involved in business. I think that's great." I was trying to sound supportive.

No answer.

I decided to keep up the small talk a little longer. "My family is doing fine. They are living in New Jersey right now. Carlisle is a doctor at Johns Hopkins. Alice is visiting Denali and Emmett and Rosalie are on their honeymoon, again. Esme is fine, she will be so happy to hear that you are well."

She was looking down at her hands. She spoke in a small rough voice. "You said Carlisle visited you. Why aren't you with your family?"

I was relieved we seemed to be having a real conversation.

"I have been living in Ireland for a while." _Trying vainly to get through the days without you, Bella. _I wanted to tell her every part of what my heart was feeling.

Her brow furrowed for a small moment, then she looked far into my eyes. I desperately searched for any sign of what she was thinking. I saw a flicker of deep hurt and then her eyes became hard and distant. Her heart stopped for a moment and then began beating much slower than before. She smiled wryly as she stared at me, "Having fun with one of those 'distractions'?"

I opened my mouth to reply, but she interrupted me. "Listen Edward, I will set up a meeting for 7:00 a.m. on Monday to discuss all of this. I suggest you bring your lawyers. Notice I said plural on lawyers. You will need more than one. We will be primarily discussing the financial records on your offshore markets for the last ten years. This will be the first in a series of meetings, so if you need to get back to your distraction, see if Jasper can stay."

"Bella, please, I . . ."

"And furthermore, in the conference room I would ask that you address me as Ms. Swan. I will return the courtesy to you, Mr. Cullen."

She turned and began walking out of the room. I followed after her and said, "I just want to talk. Can't we just sit and talk? I want to know what you have been doing? What your interests are. I want to know you as you are now."

She spun around and looked directly into my eyes. Her face was smoldering. "You want to get to know me? Well, you're looking at it. Stick around a while Mr. Cullen, and you will see just what kind of human I turned out to be."

With that, I watched her walk rapidly out the door. She walked swiftly past her table and Simmons and Thomas jumped up and began following her down the stairs. A moment later, Simmons came back alone. He stared curiously at me and straightened his tie as he said, "Well, it appears gentlemen that I will see you Monday morning." He then shook our hands and left us alone.

Jasper turned to look at me. "I am guessing that it didn't go well."

I ran my hands through my hair in frustration. "No Jasper, it didn't go well, not well at all."

Perhaps the life I had imagined for Bella, hadn't turned out quite the way I'd hoped.

**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - **

**How did the alternating POVs turn out? Was it obnoxious? Love you guys. See ya tomorrow! I hope . . . . . . . .**


	6. PROBLEM

**Well, I am actually speechless. Thank you to everyone who gave their opinion about that last chapter. Honestly, how big a stress is it to write about Edward and Bella seeing each other after seven years! I clapped my hands and bounced up and down on my chair as I read all the great things you had to say.**

**I added the last little bit of Second Sight because Bella's POV starts right at the stairs. I was so relieved that so many of you wanted to know what Bella was really going through, because that was exactly what I had written! Edward POV tomorrow! He tells us of the first day in the Conference Room!**

**See ya at the end . . . . .**

_She turned and began walking out of the room. I followed after her and said, "I just want to talk. Can't we just sit and talk? I want to know what you have been doing? What your interests are. I want to know you as you are now."_

_She spun around and looked directly into my eyes. Her face was smoldering. "You want to get to know me? Well, you're looking at it. Stick around a while Mr. Cullen, and you will see just what kind of human I turned out to be."_

_With that, I watched her walk rapidly out the door. She walked swiftly past her table and Simmons and Thomas jumped up and began following her down the stairs. A moment later, Simmons came back alone. He stared curiously at me and straightened his tie as he said, "Well, it appears gentlemen that I will see you Monday morning." He then shook our hands and left us alone._

_Jasper turned to look at me. "I am guessing that it didn't go well."_

_I ran my hands through my hair in frustration. "No Jasper, it didn't go well, not well at all."_

_Perhaps the life I had imagined for Bella wasn't quite what I had hoped._

_- - - - - - - -_

**Bella's POV**

I held on tight to the railing as I made my way down the ballroom stairs. The last thing I needed was to trip and fall down after what I'd said to Edward. I just wanted to get out of here. I felt the tears so dangerously close. Suddenly, Simmons came up beside me.

I set my teeth and hissed, "Set up a 7:00 a.m. meeting for C- CORP on Monday." I never looked at him, and I never stopped moving down the stairs. A few tears had escaped down my face. Simmons was, to say the least, very shocked. He turned back up the stairs without ever saying a word.

Then, Vaughn was there.

"Bella, I am taking you home."

I had safely made it down the stairs by then. I kept my face down until we were safely out of the ballroom. Once we were out in the lobby I finally spoke.

"I'm okay Vaughn. I will be just fine," I said roughly.

He sighed hard as he wiped a tear off my cheek and said, "Nothing you say will convince me to leave you alone right now. So, do you want to go home, or do you want to just walk around a while?"

I didn't know where I wanted to go. I had no idea which direction to take. I wanted to run, but to where? I was lost. I was standing in a city of millions of people, yet I felt so alone. I stared out at nothing and said, "I just want to go home."

We walked out of the hotel in silence. Once we were outside, I could smell the remains of the rainstorm. I inhaled deeply and closed my eyes. I could hear the familiar honks of cars and hear people traveling hurriedly down the sidewalk. It brought some sanity back to me and I finally felt like I could exhale.

I opened my eyes and Vaughn was standing in front of me, looking at me with an alarmed look on his face.

"Bella, you're shaking. What happened while you were talking to that Cullen guy?"

There was no way for me to answer that question. I ignored him and just started walking down the sidewalk. I kept my arms folded as we walked.

There was a deep silence between us for a time and then very cautiously he said, "It seems to me that you had a history with him."

_Yes, I was going to be with him forever. He was my destiny,_ _my soul mate, and then he told me he didn't love me_.

"It was a long time ago," I breathed.

We were approaching my building. I was very distracted and jumpy. I glanced at him and said, "I never thanked you for the charm bracelet. It's beautiful. Thank You."

He smiled and said, "You're welcome."

As we walked into the lobby, he held up my chin and said softly, "I'll call you next week, okay? I leave in the morning for our game in Philadelphia."

I nodded absentmindedly and turned for the elevator.

The last person got out on the 47th floor, and apparently, that was exactly how long I was able to hold it together. I slid down into a corner of the elevator and began to sob. I found my way to my door and tripped my way into my apartment. I cried, I screamed, I hit a wall and hurt my hand. I ended up in front of my large window sitting on the floor weeping, and staring out at the night.

I had sometimes fantasized how I would act if I ever saw him again. I had planned on being callous, and laughing and rolling my eyes in a flippant manner as we talked about the good ol' days in Forks. I had planned on giving him the impression that I had barely even thought of him over the years. I had failed miserably.

I had been angry, defensive, and biting in my remarks. I flinched at the dramatic comment I had made before I stormed out of the room. He didn't care one bit about what kind of human I had turned out to be. I wished I could take it all back. If only I'd had some advance warning. I would have been prepared. I would have been ready. Maybe.

I saw his face again and I realized why I had not been able to move on. His beauty was woven into every part of my life from my dreams, to my drive to constantly work, and how I treated everyone around me. I thought I had committed every part of him to perfect memory. I hadn't remembered exactly how impossibly long his eyelashes were, I had forgotten precisely how the light played with his hair, my memory was no where near accurate on the angle of his chin, and the roundness of his lips, and how his shoulders, even in a tuxedo, looked so powerful and steady.

I was still desperately in love with him.

For the past seven years there had not been one time that I had laid in bed at night and not thought of him. For the past seven years there had not been one time that I had watched the sunset and felt twilight upon me that I didn't think of him. Every time it had rained I had thought of him, every time I heard a love song playing in the elevator, every time I tripped, every time I saw a Volvo, every time I heard a piano, every time I saw a couple together, every time I felt my heart beating, every time I thought of Phoenix. every time I cut myself, every time I saw wildflowers, every time I touched cold stone.

I couldn't believe that after all the times I would have given anything to see him again, I had just left him there and walked away. Maybe, part of me wanted to be the one to walk away from him this time. My heart fluttered, and it made me angry how much it meant to me that he did see me in the blue dress and told me I looked beautiful.

I was going to have to see him in two days. How would I do it? Not ever seeing him and knowing he didn't love me, was apparently just as hard as knowing I would see him and that he didn't love me. I had no idea how many miles I was going to have to run to get mind off of what was happening in Ireland.

I didn't care about acquiring his company anymore. I was sure that Carlisle, with the help of his children, had put much care into building it, and it meant a great deal to them. I could never do that to the Cullens. I loved them too much.

Besides, if I went through with this, Edward would have to remain in town at least a month or two for meetings. I couldn't bear to see him all those times and then have him leave. I didn't have enough faith in myself and the person I could be around him. I had a reputation that I wanted left intact after this was all over. I wanted him gone now. Yes, I wanted him gone now, and then try to forget he was ever here. Business as usual.

So, now I had a new plan. I would tell Mr. Hathaway on Monday morning that I was no longer going after C- CORP. My designs had changed. I would find a bigger and more successful company to take down to appease him. There would be no Monday morning meeting with Edward, just his lawyers. I realized I had no idea how to get a hold of Edward or any of this team. I would put Simmons on that.

I was on my knees with my forehead resting on the carpet, my hands pulled tightly around my middle. I was still wearing the blue dress. I thought that Valentino probably never intended for his dress to be treated this way. I didn't have the strength to get to my bed. All I could do was hold myself tight and attempt to keep myself together. I was afraid to go to sleep. I knew who would star in every dream tonight.

_You can do this, Bella. You can do this_. If I repeated it enough it was sure to sink in. As my eyelids finally closed, I felt much better. Tonight at the party, would be the first and last time I would ever see Edward. I would make sure of that.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I was standing in the forest. It was a familiar place. My mind was used to coming here. I could feel the squish of the earth under my feet. _No, please no_. I was pleading. I turned and looked behind me. That's when I saw it. The vine maple tree. It's leaves were rustling ever so slightly. There was no wind. Why were the leaves moving? Then realization spread through me, hot and blistering. Edward had run away. He had made the breeze. He was gone.

I sat up quickly; jolted out of sleep. Great. The leaf dream again. That's all I needed. The sun was coming in the window and I had no idea what time it was, I just knew that even though it was Saturday, I should have been at the office a long time ago.

It went against everything that I had taught myself, but I laid back down. My eyes were sticky and swollen. It felt better if I closed them. I tried to calm myself down. _No harm done, Bella. So, you saw him again. No big deal. You will never have to see him again._ I tried to convince myself that was a good thing.

I had come this far. I could get through this. This was not as bad as before. Not as bad . . . .

For some reason, my mind traveled back to that stupid letter I had left for him at Charlie's house before I left for college. The letter he would never see. I had been so angry when I wrote it. It was my last morning in Forks. I hadn't been back since. I had just taken the last few things out of my bedroom and sat them by the front door for Charlie to load in the cruiser.

I stood at the bottom of the stairs, wondering if I could handle going back up one more time, if I could handle saying good-bye to all the memories of my room. After several minutes of deliberation, I bounded angrily up the stairs and stood in my doorway. I woodenly walked to my window that I had never locked and made sure that the latch was shut tight. I ran my hand over my rocking chair. I laid down on my bed one more time and felt the shaking begin. I gritted my teeth and shouted to no one, "This is the last time I cry in my room for you!"

I stood up and dried my face. I made my bed and laid Gran's blanket across the bottom, then I found paper in my bedside table drawer and scrawled the angry message. I sealed the envelope, along with my heart, and walked out of the room without turning back.

The problem was, I had turned back in my memory too many times. I didn't know which way to turn anymore.

The phone rang. I was back to reality. I struggled to get up in the tight dress and stumbled my way to the table and answered in a thick voice, "Hello."

"Isabella, I tried the office first, you are usually there at this time on Saturday mornings. I'm glad I caught you before you head over. I want to know how things went last night with "C".

I blinked my eyes and forced myself to become coherent. "Yes, Mr. Hathaway, I did meet with him last night, and we have scheduled a meeting for Monday morning at 7:00 a.m."

"Excellent, I will be anxious to hear how you plan to proceed with the take-over. Stop by my office after you are finished."

"Ah, Mr. Hathaway, I may have been premature in thinking they were ripe for a split. I may use Monday's meeting to tell them we are abandoning our designs on their company." I flinched and prepared for his reply.

"Isabella," he growled, "I have been over all the documents and C- CORP is a textbook case for what you do best. The conditions couldn't be any more perfect for a take-over." There was a slight pause as he said, "You're not going soft on me, are you Swan?"

I straightened my back and stammered for a moment before saying, "No sir, I'm not. I just think . . ."

"I don't pay you to think Swan, I pay you to catch and kill." In a softer, more menacing voice he said, "I don't have to tell you what will happen to your future with us if you decide not to play ball. Names of those who go soft, never get placed on buildings. Word will spread that you have lost your edge, and no one else will hire you either."

My mouth was dry and I swallowed hard as I said, "There is another company I have been looking at that I believe to be a much sounder bet than C- CORP. We would stand to make double the money on the deal."

He growled low as he said, "You were the one who alerted me to C- CORP in the first place! We have been on this for a year now. Do you have any idea how much money we have spent in man power alone to flush this "C" character out?"

"I don't want to continue the takeover of C- CORP." I tried to sound more decisive and forceful.

"Swan," he sounded a bit more gentle. "I know you may be a little scared to . . "

"Scared?" I shouted into the phone. "I assure that I am not at all scared to take on C- CORP."

"Then what reason could you possibly have for not wanting to take them down?" He asked incredulously.

_Because the company belongs to a family full of vampires and I am in love_ _with their oldest son_. I didn't really have a quick answer for him.

"Isabella." His voice was low and intense. "I have molded you and sculpted you into the perfect killing machine. I have been your mentor these last three years and I have always been on your side. I have never demanded anything of you, but I am telling you now, I want you to make me proud. I order you to finish what you started. Take this company down or you will not see your name next to mine on the building."

My stomach turned. "I won't let you down, Mr. Hathaway," I said firmly.

"That's the spirit, I will talk to you on Monday then. " He sounded much more jovial.

"Bye, Mr. Hathaway."

This was a problem.

- - - - - - - - - - -

After my "discussion" with Mr. Hathaway, I quickly showered and made it to the office about 9:30. Simmons was already there. He always went to the gym and had an early morning work-out on Saturday mornings, and then came into the office in sweats and a t-shirt.

He had everything spread out in the conference room. The huge table made working much easier. He tried to act like everything was normal, like he didn't see me cry last night. I knew I had acted a tad less than professional.

"Hey there," he said. "I hope you don't mind, I took the liberty of ordering breakfast. Sitting at the table was a steaming cup with Starbucks written across it.

"This is just what I needed, thank you," I said a bit too cheerfully.

I laid out my papers and said, "What section are you on. Bring me up to speed with what you are doing."

So, the day went on until about 1:00 in the afternoon when Simmons said he needed something to eat. I had forgotten all about eating.

"Can I get you something?" he asked.

I shook my head. "No, I'm fine."

"I'll be back in twenty minutes." He stood up and left the room.

I knew I should keep working, but I was exhausted from everything that had happened last night. I laid my head on the table and told myself I would just close my eyes for a minute.

I woke up to see Simmons sifting through C- CORP's records of a company purchased in France in 1953. I bolted upright and looked at my watch and saw it was 3:30 in the afternoon.

"Crap, I'm sorry. Why didn't you wake me up?" I started blinking and shifting papers.

"It looked like you could use the sleep," he said dryly.

I rubbed my face and started back on the rough draft of the report I planned to give to C- CORP's lawyers on Monday.

"I brought you some food," he said.

"I said I was fine," I retorted.

Without looking up, he said, "Humans eat."

He handed me the styrofoam container filled with Chow Mein and rice. I pieced at the now cold food unenthusiastically.

"Bella, do you care If I ask you a question?" He asked hesitantly.

"Yes, actually I do," I said sternly, never looking up from my papers.

"You talked in your sleep," he said.

That wasn't really a question. I slowly looked up at him.

"You said "Edward" three times," he said softly. His brown eyes looked at me carefully.

I smirked. "I must really have this company on my mind."

"I don't think that's it." He was talking with a little more confidence in his voice.

I just kept my head down and continued writing. I heard him give an exasperated sigh. I ignored him.

"Bella, I can't go into this meeting on Monday not knowing where your head is at. You changed as soon as you saw Edward Cullen last night. If you don't want to talk to me, then so be it. But, you need to talk to somebody and as far as I know, I am your only friend."

My eyes shot up to him and I glared daggers at him as I said, "Oh, you're my friend? I wasn't aware that friends sold each other out for tickets on the 50 yard line!"

He backed up and winced. "I just told him he could sit by you. I didn't offer him your firstborn."

I rolled my eyes and said, "You are not my only friend. I have lots of friends."

He just sat back and looked at me. One corner of his mouth went up and he looked like he wanted to laugh, but he let it go.

"You obviously know this Cullen guy from somewhere, and you definitely have some kind of history," he said seriously.

"You're obviously in the wrong line of work, you should be a detective," I scoffed.

He shifted uncomfortably in his seat and said, "I saw something last night that I haven't seen once in the two years we have been working together." His eyes narrowed. "Your wall came down, not a lot, but some. I was under the impression that your wall was a fortress, completely impenetrable."

He leaned forward in his seat. "You were, or still are, in love with that guy."

I reared back in my chair. "You are wrong, totally off base, and totally _out of line_," I said angrily.

He did not back down. "Before Thomas Vaughn, when was your last date?"

I twisted my face and said, "What does that have to do with anything?"

"Just humor me, when was your last date?"

I just stuttered and stammered.

"Did you date in college?"

"No. I was too busy studying so I could be smarter than you," I shot back.

"Did you date in High School?"

"Sure," I tried to sound nonchalant.

"So, your last date was when you were like, 17 or 18?"

"Something like that," I muttered.

"You went to high school in Northern Washington and Forks Hospital is in Northern Washington, so . . . my guess is that your last date was with him." He sat back smugly in his chair acting like Sherlock Holmes solving a case. All he was missing was the pipe and funny hat.

I just stared at him and chuckled, "You don't even know what you're talking about."

"Oh, I think I do," he was serious again.

"I know plenty of guys," I said defiantly.

"Name two."

"Philip and Oscar," I said triumphantly.

"Who are Philip and Oscar?" He said while gesturing with his hand.

I muttered something unintelligible.

He stuck his ear out to me, "What was that? I didn't quite catch that."

"They are the doormen in my building, okay?" I sat back and folded my arms as I stared at my papers.

Simmons didn't move, he just raised one eyebrow.

He let out a big sigh and said, "Bella, before we go into that meeting on Monday, I need to know one thing. Are you in love with Edward Cullen?"

"No way," I replied.

He stood up exasperated and walked around the room. He stopped and leaned against the wall across from the table and ran his hands through his hair thoughtfully and then said, "You could do a lot worse, you know. He seems to be a really nice guy and apparently for being so young, he is quite successful and wealthy. Every woman in the ballroom couldn't take their eyes off of him. Lucky for me, he and his brother left before Giselle saw them. Thomas Vaughn was standing right next to Edward and no one even looked at him. . . ."

"Shut up, all right?" I had to interrupt him. Being reminded of Edward's virtues was the last thing I needed right now.

He came back to the table and leaned over it and looked right in my face. His voice got softer and he said, "Your meeting last night wasn't very long, and Jasper was extremely evasive when I tried to get information. When you walked away, you were cry. . . a little emotional, which tells me that long ago he did something to hurt you and you have spent the last seven years trying in your own way, to forget. I believe he is the reason for your wall. The one who made you not be human anymore."

I stared at him in shock. The irony of what he said was not lost on me. I just wanted him to stop talking and leave this alone.

"We still have a lot of work to do," I said roughly.

"Are you in love with Edward Cullen?" his eyes bored into me."

"I already answered that question," I said angrily.

He hit the table and said, "Damn it, Bella. Do you love Edward Cullen?"

"It doesn't matter anyway," I said painfully.

All the air went out of him in a frustrated blow. "If it doesn't matter, then just tell me." He looked at me with compassion. "If I know what's really going on, then I can help, make it easier. I have a lot of professional stake in this too, you know. We're a team. Bella, are you still in love with him?"

I bit my lip and felt the tears in the corner of my eyes. I defiantly swallowed them down. I couldn't say the words. I just nodded my head.

He stood up and looked relieved. He put his hands on his hips and said, "Thank you."

"Now, I need to know how you plan to take down the company of the man you love?" He looked at me warily.

I took a deep breath and said, "I had already decided that I was dropping the whole thing, but Mr. Hathaway called this morning and did not beat around the bush when he accused me of going soft and informed me that my future with the company was tied to this deal."

"What?" He threw out his hands and then put them behind his head as he said sadly, "Actually, I guess that doesn't surprise me."

"What are you going to do?" He asked me.

I sighed and said, "I have no future with Edward. I am sure that he and his family have numerous holdings in many other places. They would stand to make millions off this deal. I am going through with it. I will be as tough as I always am, and finish it quickly. He'll leave, and for me, it will go back to business as usual."

"Is that what you really want?" He asked doubtfully.

Without flinching, I said, "Absolutely."

I put my finger right in his face and said harshly, "And another thing, I will fire you on the spot if you try any more matchmaker business. If I find out that Edward Cullen has my direct phone number at the office, my home number, or my private cell number, I will blame you and you are gone. You will not tell him where I live, you will not let him in my office, you will not find a way for us to be alone. Get the word out to the entire staff that nobody is to speak to them."

I wasn't taking any chances. Edward and Jasper could dazzle a starving man from his last crust of bread.

His lips were a hard line as he stared at me and then simply said, "Okay."

"One more thing," I knew it was going to sound strange, but it was necessary that I say it. "Anytime we are around Mr. Cullen, you must not, under any circumstances _think_ about what I told you concerning my feelings for him."

His face twisted in confusion. "You want me to control my thoughts around him?" He looked at me warily.

I struggled for the right way to phrase it. "He is . . . very. . . perceptive . . . to what others around him are thinking. Call it a gift."

I had to make him fear Edward just a little bit.

"I am concerned that if he finds out how I feel, he will try and use my feelings for him against me as leverage, so you must not even think about any of this, okay? It would be a good idea if you tried very hard not to think about our strategy either."

"All right," he said meekly. I could see that his impression of Edward was changing. That was good. He needed a little healthy fear. I was feeling better about things. Two or three months tops, and then back to business as usual.

Without another word, we both put our heads back down and got back to work.

I was now a world class problem solver who was about to go into the battle of her life.

I had never lost.

And I wasn't about to start now.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

**Well, tomorrow is Edward's perspective of the first day in meetings! Please let me know what you think! Tomorrow is Homecoming so I will be posting about 2:00 in the afternoon. See ya tomorrow! I hope . . . . . . .**


	7. Fresh Meat

**Hello! okay first, thank you for reviewing. I am amazed at your thoughts and suggestions. Please keep giving me your opinion. It is really helping to guide me and help me tweak things along the way.**

**Okay, there is a song. It is by "Cutie Patootie" Enrique Eglesias called "Somebody's Me". I think it fits Edward great!**

**There is a restaurant mentioned here called Fraunces Tavern. It is less than a mile from the harbor right by Wall Street. It has been there since 1762 and is the Tavern where George Washington bid farewell to his troops after we won the Revolutionary War! I have eaten there, and it's really cool. It is kind of a Beef and ale place. Okay, I know it's Friday and I just talked about History . . . I'm done.**

**See ya at the end!**

**- - - - - - - - - - **

You.

Do you remember me?

Like I remember you?

Do you spend your life, going back in your mind to the time?

Cause I,

I walk the streets alone.

I hate being on my own.

And everyone can see that I really fell,

And I'm going through hell,

Thinking about you with somebody else.

- - -

Somebody wants you,

Somebody needs you

Somebody dreams about you every single night.

Somebody can't breathe,

Without you it's lonely,

Somebody hopes that someday you will see,

That's Somebody's Me

- - -

How?

How did we go wrong?

It was so good and now it's gone.

And I pray every night,

That our paths soon will cross,

And what we had isn't lost.

Cause you're always right here in my thoughts.

- - -

Somebody wants you,

Somebody' needs you.

Somebody dreams about you every single night.

Somebody can't breathe,

Without you it's lonely,

Somebody hopes that someday you will see,

Somebody's Me.

- - -

You will always be in my life,

Even if I'm not in your life,

Cause you're in my memory.

- - -

You.

When you remember me,

And before you set me free,

Oh, Listen please.

- - -

Somebody wants you. Somebody needs you.

Somebody dreams about you every single night.

Somebody can't breathe,

Without you it's lonely,

Somebody hopes that someday you will see,

Somebody's Me.

Somebody's Me.

Somebody's Me.

Enrique Eglesias - Somebody's Me

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

**(Edward's POV)**

I was faintly aware of cars passing by and a policeman that kept circling the block eyeing me suspiciously. It was Sunday night. For the third night in a row, I had positioned myself on a park bench across the street from Bella's apartment building and had sat all night staring up at her window.

On Friday night, after she left the party, Jasper and I waited 10 minutes and then I followed her scent. It led to an upscale high rise apartment building only two blocks down from our hotel. She was so close. We walked into the lobby and Bella's scent became much stronger. I knew she was in for the night. The only thing I didn't know was if she was alone, or if that Thomas gentleman was with her. I had to know.

I went up to the doorman and said, "Excuse me, I have something that Isabella Swan left at a party tonight. Is there any way of getting it to her?"

"You could leave it at the front desk and attach a note. I would make sure she got it in the morning," he offered helpfully.

I smiled politely. "No, thank you, I will see her tomorrow and will give it to her myself."

What I really wanted, was to hear what his mind would tell me when I said Bella's name. I was extremely frustrated that his mind did not show if Thomas went into the elevator with her. However, his thoughts did tell me she lived on the top floor, in the Penthouse Suite. I would be able to get to her, but would she want me there? I thought about what she wrote in that letter. Did she choose the top floor with all of its added security because of me? Was she doing all she could to ensure I wouldn't come to her room in the night?

It was hard for me to imagine her living in such a place. She had really done quite well for herself. It didn't seem like her at all. A lot of things about Bella seemed to have changed.

When Jasper and I got back to our apartment that night, we saw that Alice had called numerous times. I dialed her number in a fury.

"Hey, Edward!" She was using her "I am so happy that I haven't a care in the world," voice.

"You knew damn well Bella was the woman I was meeting tonight. It would have been nice to have a little warning," I hissed.

"If I had told you, there would have been no meeting," she shot back.

That was true. I wouldn't have gone. At least I would like to think I would have stayed away.

"This is none of your business, Alice. Do you hear me?"

"Of course it's my business, Edward. This is a family company."

I scoffed. "You and I both know what I am talking about, Alice. I was trying, once again, to tell you that what happens with Bella is none of your business."

"Make up your mind, Edward," she said in her high voice. "Either you want me to tell you what is going on with Bella or you don't."

"Alice!" I bellowed.

She was not done trying to convince me. "I know it didn't go very well tonight, Edward. Do you want to know why? Because all of the things I told you about Bella and how she was suffering were all true. It's time you listened to me for cha . . . . "

"Stay out of it, Alice!" I was roaring into the phone. "You listen to me! I do not want to hear anything about Bella's future, or any of the decisions she is going to make. I do not want to hear about this football player she is dating, and most of all, I do not want to hear how she feels about me!"

She pouted and I gave the phone to Jasper.

Sometime later, I made the call to Carlisle. At first, he seemed relieved it was Bella, but I explained her reaction to me and I could hear the worry in his voice. We talked about possible strategies for the next hour, and I assured him I would keep him apprised of all the details.

When I hung up, I knew there was only one place I wanted to be.

I went back and stayed up all night looking up at Bella's window. After all this time, here she was. What had she been doing all these years? Had she been happy? I pictured her in college. I had so wanted her to have the college experience. I hoped that she enjoyed it and had great memories of parties, and dances . . . and dates.

All through the night I listened intently, but I never heard Thomas. He wasn't there. At least one thing had gone in my favor.

I was about to leave the next morning, when a car from Berkshire-Hathaway came and picked her up at 9:00 a.m.. Working on a Saturday didn't seem like much of a life. I supposed that was what Vice Presidents who are about to get their name on a building do. I had my own meetings. I left to get Jasper.

She stayed at the office until after midnight, and then the next morning, it was barely sunrise when I saw Bella come out and cross the street and begin running through Central Park. Bella waking at sunrise and running? There were definitely some changes in her. I stayed in the trees and followed far behind her. She ran at least ten miles. She never tripped. She seemed to be doing just fine all on her own. All too soon, she walked back in her building and I was left standing in the trees staring after her.

On that third night, as I stared at her window again, I realized I had some decisions to make.

Bella didn't love me anymore, of that I was sure.

The way she had acted Friday night told me all I needed to know. She had gotten over me. She had made a new life. She once offered me her soul so that she could be with me forever, now . . . she called us a high school romance and couldn't look me in the face.

It was what I wanted. I was hoping that I could make it as if I had never touched her life. I was happy for her. But seeing her again made it fresh in my mind and heart just what I had given up.

We could have had everything.

My marble skin could stand up to the sharpness of any blade, but this pain carved straight through me, and burned and scarred as it went. I wanted her so much. It was said that our venom was the only thing that left a scar on us. That wasn't exactly true.

If I wasn't able to fend off the attack, I was going to have to see her at least once or twice or week for the next two of three months. How should I act towards her? Should I treat her the way I _wanted_ to treat her? Or should I treat her how I would treat an acquaintance, impartial and unaffected?

Now that I had seen her again, I had another problem. I didn't want to leave her. I wanted to be wherever she was. I _wanted_ to be in love with her. Would I pathetically follow her on her run every morning? Would I watch her on dates? The thought of going back to Ireland or New Jersey with my family when I knew she was here, was just too much to take. I would give away all my tomorrows just to touch her again.

There was something else. I knew that she had grown past me. I knew that she had become this breathtaking woman that wouldn't give me a second thought, but even though it had all happened seven years ago, I _needed_ to tell her that I still loved her. The rest of my existence would be bearable if I could just tell her I left to save her, and not because my love for her had diminished in any way. Before this was over, I would tell her.

It was very late before Bella's light finally went out.

"Good night, Bella," I whispered.

I made myself comfortable on the bench and settled in for another long night, alone.

- - - - - - - - -

Monday morning, Jasper and I were preparing to leave for the meeting. I had a hard time believing that Bella was going to go through with this. I could see her striking out at me, but this would be a blow to the entire family. The Bella I knew did not have it in her to be this cruel. Of course, the Bella I knew was an eighteen year old child.

Even though this would be an unpleasant morning, I couldn't contain the exhilaration I felt at knowing I would see her again. I would be in the same room with her. I could look in her face and speak to her. I could once again hear her heartbeat.

"How are you doing?" Jasper asked me.

"Fine," I answered.

"Anything you want to talk about?" He seemed concerned.

I swallowed hard. "She looked so beautiful at the party, didn't she?"

"Yes, she did," he said softly.

"She seemed so sure of herself," I added.

"Yes, she has really grown a lot," Jasper agreed.

"Every man in that room wanted her. They didn't all like her, but all of the minds I heard were drawn to her," I lamented.

Jasper didn't comment on that. I saw him smile a little.

I decided I wanted him to know what I had been thinking.

"No matter what the outcome, I want her to know how much I love her," I whispered.

Jasper's head turned sharply. "Are you sure that's wise?"

We were ready to leave. Before we walked out the door, I said, "I want her to know that I didn't leave because I didn't love her. I know it was a long time ago and that she doesn't love me anymore, but it has been a burden that is too heavy to bear. I can't let her go the rest of her life thinking that she wasn't enough for me, that it was easy for me to leave, that I don't cherish her."

Jasper thumped me on the back and raised an eyebrow as he said, "Good luck with that."

We entered the conference room at Berkshire-Hathaway and found our seats. Our lawyer's faces were grim. I saw Simmons walk in and then more lawyers and assistants. Simmons came and shook mine and Jasper's hand. "I'll contact Ms. Swan now that we're all here," he said.

My insides turned as I anticipated her arrival. To occupy myself, I decided to get all the knowledge, data, and facts from her team that I could. They had to be full of secrets for the enemy. After a few minutes, I sat there bewildered. Her lawyers were amazingly void of information. They seemed to have their thoughts on anything but this buy-out. I twitched uncomfortably as I realized that Bella had prepared her team for me. She was good.

There was a tense silence in the room for a few minutes, and then she came breezing into the room followed by four more assistants. She walked swiftly to the head of the table and said, "Good morning everyone, let's get started."

I didn't hear anything she said for the next ten minutes. I closed my eyes and breathed her in. She was wearing her hair down, more the way I remember her wearing it before. She wore a brown skirt that clung tightly to her thighs and tapered in snug just above her knees. Her blouse was a pale pink color and made of an airy material that flowed when she moved. Her makeup was light and showed off her lovely cheeks and full lips. Her legs, oh man, her legs. She wore really high heels. She used to call them death traps when I knew her, but they made her legs look amazing.

Jasper nudged me and whispered, "Keep it together man."

I forced myself to pay attention.

Bella was still speaking. Her demeanor was calm, but her heart was pounding hard. She seemed to be purposely not looking at me. "So, in addition to the documents spelling out how I would like to proceed, I have a first offer on the table. It is all enumerated on page 275 Section 4 of document 7. We believe this offer to be a generous one and hope we can resolve this quickly and move on to other matters."

Mr. Banks, my head lawyer, practically jumped out of his seat. His thoughts told me he really hated her. "Ms. Swan, you seem to be under the ridiculous impression that we are just going to lie down and let you steal C- CORP from us."

"I would hardly call 27.5 billion dollars stealing," she icily shot back.

"This company is not for sale!" Mr. Banks bellowed.

"Unfortunately, your opinion is not shared by me, or the numerous businesses that have recently bought shares to all your client's companies and are chomping at the bit for a piece of you."

Bella's voice was authoritative and smooth. Try as hard as I might, I could not get over how amazing she was. Smart, tough, beautiful. I was enthralled.

Mr. Banks had a vein that was sticking out in his forehead. "We have an injunction spelling out how we will counter-sue for every attempt to take over C-CORP!"

"Interesting, but not high on the list of things we need to consider today," she sounded a little bored.

"There is one more matter we need to discuss," she said. "I want to remind the owners of C - CORP that there will be no talking to me except through their lawyers. There has to be at least one member of my firm with me if I am approached in any way. I will consider it harassment if you do not follow these rules and I _will_ press charges."

She glanced once at me during her little speech. She was going to have me arrested if I tried to talk to her? How was I going to find a way to get close to her? From the anger I saw at the party, and from what I witnessed in here, she would probably actually do it. I had to find a way to get her alone. For now, two could play at this game of hardball.

I raised my hand like I was in fourth grade and waited for her to call on me. Her eyebrow raised as she said, "Mr. Cullen, you have something to say?"

I couldn't help but smile. I was talking to Bella. "I believe, Ms. Swan, that phone calls made from a doctor to a patient are held private under doctor-patient privilege, are they not?"

Immediately, Bella saw where I was going with this line of questioning. She stiffened, "I may be aware of that," she answered flatly.

"I believe that the phone record pulled by your intern last Friday is deemed confidential, and therefore, I believe you have a small matter of "breach of privacy" on your hands."

Bella's teeth clenched and her jaw tightened. Simmons looked at me with an incredulous stare wondering how I could possibly know that an intern had pulled a confidential phone record to trace it to Forks Hospital.

Her eyes narrowed as she said, "Just because that call was made by a doctor, does not mean the person on the other end was a patient."

Bella was fast.

I was faster.

I pulled out a piece of paper and said, "Here is proof that the person contacted by one Dr. Carlisle Cullen was indeed a patient, and not just a member of our company in France. The only way that number could have been traced was through illegal means." I smiled big, just for her.

Bella's lawyers began scrambling and yelling and clawing at the paper. My lawyers were completely shocked and staring at me and each other. Simmons was trying to explain to his lawyers how he got his information, and Bella and I, through all the chaos, just stared at one another.

My chest was thumping up and down madly. Her heart was pounding even harder. I wanted to leap across the table and grab her in my arms and pull her to me and crush my lips on hers and tell her I would never let her go again. That's what I wanted to do, instead, I winked at her.

Her face colored immediately and I sighed at the blush in her cheeks. It pulled her out of our stare and she called for attention, and said, "Gentlemen, before we proceed any further, we will have to look over the document and discuss what this means, I am sure both sides want to see this resolved quickly."

She got a wry smile on her face and said, "I propose that we all meet for lunch today at Fraunces Tavern." She stared at me, "Does that work for you Mr. Cullen?"

Meet for lunch. Great.

"I don't believe that my brother and I . . ."

"Oh, please Mr. Cullen, we very much need you there. You do care about your company, don't you?" The danged beautiful she-devil.

"We will be there," I said dryly.

Her smile was angelic. "Until then gentlemen." She then walked out of the office.

Jasper sneered at me. "Thanks brother, just what I wanted, lunch."

Just then, I heard a voice_. "Bella did well, Mr. Cullen would never guess how she really feels about him."_

My face whipped around the room as I located the voice. It was Simmons, her assistant. I stared at him and clenched my teeth as I strained to get more information from him. His mind was on to other matters. He looked over at me warily and I heard him again.

_Remember what Bella said. Just get the hell out of the room before Bella fires you from the best job_ _you've ever had_.

How did she really feel about me? Judging from how she behaved just now, she detested me. Was it all an act? Simmons knew about mine and Bella's past, and she had obviously warned Simmons about me, so they must have a close working relationship. I would be paying much more attention to him from now on.

We were bombarded by our lawyers. Smiles covered their faces as they demanded to know how I got that information. I played dumb, said I got lucky, and followed Jasper out of the building.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

**(Bella's POV)**

I had already broken the first rule about dealing with Edward and C- CORP. I had promised myself that the only place I would ever see him was that conference room. I had taken steps to insure myself. Now, on the very first day, I was meeting him and his people for lunch.

I had pledged in my mirror that morning that I would treat him like any other adversary. I wouldn't get close to him. I wouldn't let us become friends, and I would stay blissfully detached in all our meetings. Edward would see me walk into the room, and he would see me walk out. I would never even have to address him personally. I would direct all communication through his head lawyer, Harry Banks. Harry was just arrogant enough to think that he was in charge anyway.

Edward had disarmed me in there. I tried not to notice the custom tailored Hugo Boss suit he was wearing that fit him like a glove, or the tie he had on that brought out the gold in his eyes. I should have known he would have heard Simmons telling me at the party about the call Carlisle made from Forks. He winked at me. My memory shot back to the time he winked at me in the lunchroom. I grabbed a folder off my desk and began fanning myself.

_Get a grip, Bella_. I yelled internally.

I would show Edward who was in charge. Getting the upper hand in negotiations was what I did best.

When Simmons came to my office to get me for the lunch meeting, I was on the phone with a client. He stood in front of my desk waiting for me to finish my conversation. When I was done, I stood up and began walking out the door. Simmons was deep in thought.

"That Jasper and Edward, they are quite interesting individuals aren't they?" He said.

I sighed in frustration, "I suppose so."

Simmons did not seem to notice my frustration. "I mean, aside from them having the coldest hands I have ever shaken in my life, they are extremely intelligent and well-bred. I heard Edward on the phone talking to his companies in Russia and Italy and he spoke the languages fluently. I can't imagine what he was like in High School."

I blew out air angrily and said, "Yeah well, he kind of stood out."

Lucky me, Simmons kept talking.

"It's really strange how calm I felt in that meeting. It's almost as if I don't really care what the outcome of this takeover is, I just feel calm and relaxed. Did you feel that way?"

That damned Jasper. We were at the elevators and I hit the button with so much force that I knocked over the plant sitting next to it.

"I guess not," he muttered.

When we were in the elevators alone, I looked at him and said, "Did you control your thoughts in that room?"

He stammered a bit. "I think so," he said meekly.

"You think so?" I yelled. "Well, what about our lawyers? You prepared them too, right?"

He backed up a bit and said with more confidence, "Yes, I did. I did talk to the lawyers, and I did control my thoughts. Don't worry about that, okay?"

Simmons and I walked out of the elevators and out the doors to the street.

"You know, that was pretty crafty of Cullen. How in the heck he found out about us finding that phone record of Forks Hospital, is beyond me," said Simmons.

"Yeah, he's pretty crafty all right," I sneered.

I put out my hand and hailed a taxi. I was just stepping into the back seat when I heard a velvet voice behind me, "Mind if we share a cab?"

"Yes, I mind," I said forcefully. My heart was pounding in my chest.

Simmons stared at me and then rolled his eyes. "I'll sit between you," Simmons sounded like a father.

I got in first, and sulked. "To Fraunces Tavern please," I said once we were all in.

We rode for five minutes in silence. I was glad it wasn't a long drive. Finally I broke the silence.

"Where's Jasper?" I said.

"I am extending his regrets at not being able to meet us for lunch. He is feeling a little under the weather," he said warmly.

Almost as if by divine intervention, at that moment, the clouds parted and the sun shone bravely through the November sky.

"Driver," I said, "Would you pull over here please?"

"Bella, we're still 3 blocks from the restaurant," Simmons said.

"I know," I said, "But it is such a nice day and the sun just came out. I haven't seen the sun in so long, and well, I just love the feel of the sun on my skin, don't you?"

Simmons looked at me as if I had three heads.

"Come on Simmons, we're walking," I said flatly. I got out on my side and dragged Simmons out with me. I poked my head back in and said, "Well, aren't you coming, Mr. Cullen?"

He looked at me with a polite smile on his face and said, "I think I'll just ride the rest of the way, thank you."

I shrugged my shoulders. "Well, all right, if that's the way you want it. Oh, and if you don't mind, be sure to pay the fare."

Another extremely polite smile. "Of course."

I shut the door with a smug smile on my face and started walking to the restaurant.

"What the heck was that all about?" Simmons cried.

"Tactics." I snapped.

Simmons and I were the last ones to arrive. Edward had arranged the seating so that there was an empty seat on each side of him. No matter what, I would be sitting by Edward. I took a deep breath and went in smiling. Edward stood as I came into the room and pulled my chair out for me.

He scooted his chair closer to me as he sat down and I used all my power to keep my heart in check. I did not, under any circumstances, want him thinking he still had any kind of power over me.

I took the initiative of ordering our appetizers, and when the waiter asked me for my order, I said very quietly, "Oh, by the way, please bring my guest here the largest and juiciest steak you have."

Edward had been talking to someone across the table and didn't appear to notice. When the waiter walked away, he watched him go. I looked at him reassuringly and said, "Don't worry, I took care of it." He looked at me warily.

After ordering, I got us down to business. "Okay gentlemen, I have discussed our little legal snag with my lawyers and at best it will delay things a few weeks. It is nothing serious enough to derail our negotiations. If you feel the need to prolong the inevitable, please, by all means file the motion, otherwise, let's get back to talking about how to handle the important matters."

All eyes were on Edward. He looked down for a moment as if deep in thought and then said in his velvet voice, "We will be filing the motion, and I can guarantee we will prolong it much longer than a few weeks."

I was seething. I made myself calm down by telling myself that any owner of any company would react this way and try to save their business. Still, I couldn't let it go.

"I appreciate your tenacity Mr. Cullen," I said acidly. "But I have always felt that when the outcome was inescapable that lengthening the process just causes more pain. I think the best way to handle this is with a _clean break_." I emphasized the last two words. He knew exactly what I was talking about.

He stared at me for a moment. His eyes were soft and gentle with no trace of anger. "I no longer agree that is the best decision," he said softly.

I felt my heart swell into my throat and I couldn't speak, breathe, or swallow. I looked into his eyes and for a moment, I saw everything there that I used to see when he would say he loved me. Our eyes locked in a struggle to understand what the other was thinking. I broke away first. I couldn't do this to myself. I couldn't sit here next to Edward and actually think that he loved me again.

I closed my eyes to get a bearing on my emotions and then forced myself to turn and start a conversation with the man on my left. My heart was pounding and there was nothing I could do about it. I knew Edward could hear it.

Our appetizers came and Edward declined, saying he was saving his appetite for whatever I ordered for him. He didn't have to wait long. Shortly, our meals came out. I was handed a salad and Edward received a plate that looked as if it was filled with half a cow. It was the largest steak I had ever seen. I actually felt a little guilty.

"Wow." That was all Edward could say. He took a deep breath and began cutting into the beast.

I began our talks again and tried to not be preoccupied with watching Edward struggle to eat the steak. No one else at the table had any idea that Edward wasn't loving his meal. There was about a ¼ of it left when he said, "I couldn't eat another bite, but it was delicious!" The dinner was winding down and I could tell that Edward was anxious to leave. After all, there was half of a cow sitting in his stomach with no place to go.

He sat uncomfortably as he answered a few last questions for his lawyers and then waited while we scheduled our next meeting for the following day.

I was so aware of him next to me, and I hated myself for not wanting the lunch to ever end. My hands instinctively went around my middle under the table as I remembered how I felt sitting by him in Biology, especially when the lights went out for the movie. I desperately wanted to reach over and touch him now just as I did then. I dug my fingers into my arms. Edward was saying his good byes and I was vainly trying to be interested in what other people around the table were saying. I wanted him to think that I didn't even notice him leaving.

All of the sudden, he leaned over to me. He put his arm on the back of my chair and I could feel the chill of his body through his suit. I could smell his delicious scent. It swirled around me and I could taste its flavor on my tongue.

My head swirled in a daze as he said softly, "At the risk of being arrested, I need you to know something. Bella, there is no one waiting for me in Ireland. I am there alone."

I was stunned and dazzled with his face inches from mine, smelling him, and gripping my chair so my hands would not come up to touch his cheek. His face stayed inches from mine for an extra second. He then stood up and excused himself and walked swiftly out the door.

I was left breathless, staring after him.

- - - - - -

Hey, I'll see you guys tomorrow, okay? Have a great Friday night!


	8. VAMPIRE

**Holy crow you guys! Homecoming was great, and afterwards my parents had a party here for my friends and our dates and even some of their parents, and I didn't get to sleep until 3:00 a.m. I just woke up at 1:30 in the afternoon! I am actually still really tired too. I just saw how many reviews I got and I can't wait to read them. I wanted to get this out first. You guys are too awesome. TOO AWESOME!!! I hope I don't blow your expectations.**

**See ya at the end!**

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**(Bella's POV)**

I sat at my desk nursing a headache from lack of sleep. I had laid in bed tossing and turning most of the night thinking about Edward and dreaming about Ireland. I had never even been to Ireland, so how I was having a dream about that place was beyond me. Why did he explain to me that he was alone? I wasn't sure what bothered me more, the fact that he told me, or how happy I felt inside when I knew he wasn't with someone.

I was getting scared. I had been able to control my feelings for so long. It was absolutely imperative that I be in command of my emotions. I had to dominate. All my hard earned discipline just couldn't leave me now when I needed it most. I absolutely had to keep this wall up high, strong, and impenetrable. He was going to turn and leave at the end of all this, and if I didn't arm and protect myself . . . well, I knew things would end badly for me.

I shook my head vigorously to clear away all the uncertainties. My mind had to be clear for the meeting I was about to have with him. I grabbed my papers and began walking to my door when Sally's voice came over the speaker.

"Mr. Vaughn is on line one for you, Ms. Swan."

I let out a frustrated blast of air and turned back to my desk. He called to say he was back in town and wanted to have lunch with me. I told him I would be in a meeting until 1:30, that I would meet him here at my office, but I really had to go because everyone was waiting for me.

Saying yes to him felt like, if that one aunt you didn't know very well invited you to Disneyland. You would be crazy to say no, but you wished it was with someone else instead.

I hurried down the hall, and when I opened the conference room door, I could feel the tension in the air. I was taken aback when I saw that Edward was seated right next to my chair, with Jasper beside him. As soon as Jasper saw me, a rush of calm filled the room. I set my teeth and slapped down my papers and pulled up my sleeves and said, "Okay, let's get to work."

We worked all morning, and we were getting nowhere. For every motion we put forth, the C- CORP lawyers had a counter motion and a way to extend this for 10 more years. My side was losing today. There were two reasons for this: First, there was no excitement in the room, no drive to get into the mud and get things done. Jasper's gift was working, but apparently not on me. I was seething.

The second reason was Edward. His eyes were dark and intense. He kept changing his focus from person to person on my team, then he would whisper to Harry, or hurriedly writing down notes to other lawyers. My team was smart, but even I wouldn't be able to keep my mind clear for hours on end. They had to think about what they fighting for at some point during the proceedings. We were being blind sided at every turn. I kept glancing nervously at Simmons. He was definitely a buffet of information for Edward to pick through. And it wasn't just legal strategy I was afraid he was getting out of Simmons' head.

I was having a hard time concentrating as I watched Edward's focused gaze, wondering and panicking every time he looked Simmons' way. Edward once again had the upper hand. And I again felt vulnerable. Just like that brokenhearted little eighteen year old girl that was left devastated in the forest. I was beyond angry.

To top it off, Edward's lawyers had just submitted another piece of paper, an injunction stating that we were barred from checking their bank statements for a company in a place called Volterra, Italy. What was so important about some little Italian city called Volterra? These were all just stall tactics.

It was nearing 1:30. Vaughn would be waiting, and my team was tired and hungry. I turned to look at Edward and said, "How long do you plan to keep up these futile, silly games?"

Harry spoke up and said, "We are trying to demonstrate to you just what kind of fight you are in for C- CORP."

I was beyond angry. I looked directly at Harry as I leaned in on the table and said acidly, "Let me tell you something. I would say that you don't know who you are dealing with, but you do. I took you down last year and left your client crying out in the hall wondering what had happened to his life's work. I will suck you dry and leave nothing but the bones for the vultures that are circling for your precious assets."

I leaned in farther and pointed my finger at Harry Banks. "You lengthen this process unnecessarily and I will make you suffer. The hammer will fall on these proceedings and all politeness will disappear and you will be left holding nothing." My voice had risen the farther I got. By the end of my speech, I had filled the room with my voice.

I heard Jasper whisper to Edward, "It looks like she became a vampire after all."

Mr. Banks was outraged. His face was red and he pounded his fist on the table and bellowed, "You will _never_ have this company!"

"Never is an awfully long time," I said gravely. I began to pack up my papers in my briefcase. Edward's face shot up to mine at my comment. Very softly so no one _else_ could hear me I whispered, "It is exactly as long as forever."

I didn't want to, but my eyes grazed past Edward's face. It was full of sentiment and feeling. His eyes were like liquid gold, unwavering and almost fierce as he leaned out of his chair. It was obvious he wanted to say something to me.

I looked away, clenching my teeth and mentally pulled myself as far away from him as I could. I set my jaw, turned my eyes back on him, and stared him down while I said flatly, "Meeting adjourned."

I left the room without looking back. I was flushed and angry at myself that I couldn't just let go. That I couldn't just be in the same room with him and just be normal. I was a grown-up now. It shouldn't be this hard.

I was stomping down the hall to my office as fast as I could go when I heard his velvet voice beside me, "Bella."

I never broke stride. Without turning to look at him I said dryly, "It's been almost a week since you saw me again. That's pretty long for you. Isn't it about time you reminded me how I'm no good for you and made it as if you never existed?"

Edward slowed down, flinching at my biting words. As I turned the corner to my office, I saw Vaughn waiting for me. His smile was large and genuine. He walked up to me quickly and kissed me on the cheek.

"I missed you, are you ready?" He asked with expectation.

I was about to answer when I heard that beautiful velvet voice coming around the corner, "Bella wait!"

Then he saw me, and stopped.

Vaughn turned around and saw him, and I saw his eyes narrow slightly. He put his hand out and said, "Cullen, right?"

Edward swallowed hard and said flatly, "Yes. Hello, Mr. Vaughn."

They stared at each other. It was deceiving to watch. Vaughn looked slightly angry and to the unknowing eye, appeared to be much more powerful than Edward. His tan chiseled features set tight on his face. Edward's face was a clear mask with no trace of emotion. It took someone who had experience with his temper to recognize his black eyes and balled fists as a sign of his anger. I wondered why Edward seemed to feel unfriendly towards Vaughn. I could find no plausible explanation for Edward's hostility.

"We should get going," I tried to sound determined, but it came out halting and uneven. I handed my briefcase to Sally and turned towards the elevators. Vaughn took my hand as we started to walk.

I looked at Edward as we passed him. I could see his jaw was clenched tight but now that his eyes were turned away from Vaughn and on me, they seemed to have a look of deep pleading.

I forced my eyes away, and as a reflex I tightened my grip on Vaughn's hand. Vaughn misinterpreted my actions and answered it with a squeeze of his own and brought my hand up to his lips and kissed it.

The elevators were at the end of the long hall. I could still feel Edward's eyes on me, and it made me self-conscious. I didn't look where my feet were taking me and I tripped on a tile that was slightly higher than the others. I lurched forward ungracefully and both my feet came out from under me. I braced myself to hit the floor, but when I opened my eyes I saw that Vaughn held me snug in his arms. He was holding me very tightly as he looked into my eyes. I smiled slightly and started wriggling myself free.

"Wow! Nice save." I said with a nervous laugh. "You should be catching those footballs instead of throwing them." He smiled large and set me back softly on flat ground. He grabbed my hand again as we started walking. We stepped in the elevator and turned around. As the doors slowly closed, I raised my eyes. I could see Edward still staring at me.

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Vaughn had made reservations at Scalini Fedeli. It was one of Manhattan's most expensive Italian restaurants, and it was only about a mile away from Wall Street. I rarely ate at Italian restaurants, for obvious reasons.

"I picked someplace close because I know how nervous you get when you are away from your office," he joked.

We settled down in a private booth and looked over the menus. After we had ordered, I looked at Vaughn and he was staring at me with concentration on his face.

"So, you had a meeting with Cullen today, the guy at the party that upset you. I believe his name was Edward."

I took a drink of my water. It gave me a chance to think of something to say.

Thankfully, he didn't wait for my response. He swallowed hard and said, "Actually, I have been thinking a lot about the party at the Waldorf and how different you were when those two guys joined our group. I don't know you very well yet, but I had never seen you act like that before."

"Act like what?" I had a large lump sitting in the middle of my throat. I just wished everybody leave me alone about the way I acted that night.

He seemed to be searching for the right words. "You were off center, unsure of yourself, perhaps afraid."

"I was just a little nervous," I said defensively. "I got over it."

"Well, I have a theory," he said while raising one eyebrow.

"Oh yeah? Let's hear it," I tried to sound playful, but I didn't think I pulled it off.

He paused a moment. He wasn't playing as he looked at me seriously and said, "You had a history with that Cullen guy, and I think you had some pretty serious feelings for him."

I didn't say anything. I am sure all traces of humor were gone from my face.

"Your silence tells me I'm right," he said confidently. "And believe it or not, I am encouraged by that."

I looked at him surprised.

"You see," he continued, "Now I know you are capable of loving someone, and I'm hoping that given time you could love a real man."

I laughed a little, "Wow, you know a real man? When do I get to meet him?" This conversation was uncomfortably serious for me. I felt the need to inject humor.

Vaughn's expression didn't change, in fact, he became more serious. He leaned across the table and said, "I have a proposition."

"What is it?" I asked. I was more than a little tense as to what he wanted.

"Give me five dates and then decide if you want to see more of me." He looked at me expectantly.

My insides seized up. I had planned on telling Vaughn today that I didn't think we should see each other. I was going to tell him that my life was a little complicated right now, and that I didn't have time to put into dating anybody. I had a strong impulse to stand up and walk away from Vaughn and never have to see him again. But why? Vaughn was perfectly, well perfect. As far as humans standards went, anyway. He was kind and smart. He was that rugged kind of handsome that made women's mouths fall open. He treated me with respect, and he didn't like, have two heads or horrible body odor or anything like that. Why did I want to run away?

Was it because I didn't like him? Because I wasn't attracted to him?

Edward's lovely face invaded my thoughts. My hands went around my middle. The hole, as always, was ready and waiting. Edward's beauty was always going to win. But, it didn't matter how lovely Edward's face was. As soon as all this was over with C- CORP, he would leave again. I knew that.

I didn't know how this was supposed to work. With Edward, I was in love with him before he had ever even touched me. In the real world, was it supposed to be hard to fall in love with somebody? Was it supposed to take time and not come instantly?

Being human was harder than it looked.

I looked up at Vaughn and said, "Look, you are better than I deserve, and I would be crazy to say no to you." I bit down on the words. I was preparing to let him down easy. Fort Bella was armed and operational. _Edward is going to leave again_, I reminded myself once more. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. It was almost like diving in the deep end for the first time.

I opened my eyes and looked at Vaughn with a doubtful look on my face. "If at any time you decide to bail out on me, I will completely understand."

His eyes flashed brightly and a huge smile spread across his face, "Are you saying yes?"

"Yeah, I think so," I thought he had been hit one too many times in the head with a football. He was crazy to pursue me.

He reached across the table and held on tightly to my hand. "I am very happy you said yes." He wasn't lying. His face was bright with happiness. "I don't want to wait for the weekend, could our first date be tomorrow night?" he asked.

I tried to return his smile. "Sure," I said.

"I was thinking that a Broadway show would be fun. The front office for the Giants has connections. Is there a show you have been wanting to see?"

I had been in New York three years and I had never been to a Broadway show. They all seemed to be love stories. "I have no idea what's playing. I trust you to choose well."

"I have the perfect show," he said with confidence. "Jennifer Garner and Kevin Kline are starring in "Cyrano". The show starts at 8:00 p.m. so it would be good to do dinner before the show. I'll make reservations for 6:00. Can I pick you up at 5:30?"

He wanted to pick me up at 5:30 on a week night? I still had a good six to eight hours of work left at that time. And it was a love story, great. I would put some of it on Simmons. He was the one that got me into this mess anyway.

I agreed. When I got back to the office, I would let Simmons know that he was saying good-bye to his social life for a few weeks.

"Can I ask you one more question?" He asked with a sincere face.

"Okay," I said warily.

"I am bringing up that Edward guy again." He shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "Is it hard to go up against someone you have a history with?"

I laughed cynically. If he only knew. I would show him "Tough Bella". I would say this as much to convince myself, as him. I made my face impassive and said, "There is no history with Edward Cullen. It didn't even last a year. It makes no difference to me. There is nothing special about this fight. He is just like any other adversary I have gone up against. He is in my past, and that is where I want him to stay."

His eyebrows raised as he said, "Corporate world, dog-eat-dog, that sort of thing?"

"Absolutely." I stated with confidence.

The waitress came with our food then, and the subject was over. We stayed in the safe realm of small talk for the remainder of lunch. Saying the words out loud like that, was a good thing. It actually made me believe and accept it all the more. Perhaps life, after seven years, was waiting for me.

**(Edward's POV)**

I watched Bella as the elevator door shut behind her and Thomas, and I felt desolated. I had started to run and catch her when she tripped, but then I had stopped myself. _I_ used to be her hero. I loved to be the one that caught her when she inevitably fell. Now, I had been replaced. I looked for the stairs and began, slowly for me, making my way down the 42 flights.

I couldn't stand here and watch her fall for this guy. But then, helplessly I knew that if wasn't Thomas, it would inevitably be someone else. She was so beautiful. I heard the thoughts of every guy who passed her. If there was a chance they took it. She constantly shot them down, but eventually, she was going to meet someone different. I felt my insides twist painfully.

I was such an idiot to leave her. What would these last seven years have been like if I had stayed? It would have been everything to me.

Through all this, a troubling thought kept nagging at me. She had grown into such a lovely woman, if I had never given in to her demands that I change her, maybe she would have felt she had outgrown me and left me anyway. What could she possibly see in me? To the world I was forever seventeen, and she had grown, changed, and progressed. Sure of herself, commanding, perhaps a bit overbearing, but altogether. . . amazing.

I turned my head. Jasper was coming swiftly down the stairs to meet me. He greeted me with a sad look. He knew I was following Bella.

"So uh, Edward. . . . the way Bella had acted in there was rather interesting." He was doing his best to sound diplomatic and polite.

Jasper was right. In our meetings, she was a different person. She had changed considerably.

"Jasper, I swore to myself I would never do this, but I need to ask you a question." I remembered Bella as warm and trusting, but now she was angry, resentful, cynical, and frightened of ever showing too much of herself. I couldn't understand what would make her change so much.

I looked at him and took a deep breath and said, "I need to know what emotions Bella is feeling for me."

Jasper flinched and said, "Are you sure?"

I laughed darkly. "No, not really."

Jasper shook his head slightly and said, "There is such a . . . wall, is the only word I can think of. I have never experienced anyone so conflicted. Sometimes, I know you can hear her heart beat in that way it does when she sees you, it seems to me that she still has very strong feelings for you, then I feel intense fear. She has a lot of anger, but she channels it into a desire to win. She is, as we have seen, extremely competitive. But, what I find strange, is that she isn't trying to win for the fame or money that comes from it. She wants to win because that will ensure that she will be able to keep working hard and not have to stop. She is terrified of ever having to stop." He took a deep breath and glanced at me before he said, "There is one overriding emotion. I was puzzled because it took a great deal of time for me to figure out what it was. I finally realized that the reason it was so hard to figure out, is because she has covered it with so many other emotions, possibly trying to hide it, or mask it. She has probably done that to protect herself. She is trying to hide it so she can survive."

I steeled myself for his answer. "What is that overriding emotion, Jasper?"

He looked deep in my eyes and said simply, "Pain."

I fell back against the wall behind me and closed my eyes. I never expected Jasper to say what he did. Alice had kept insisting that Bella loved me more than I ever really knew. Perhaps she was right. It was supposed to be as if I never existed, just like Bella said when she threw my words justifiably back in my face, but it seemed that I had lived on to make her suffer.

Jasper looked at me apologetically.

"Thanks," I whispered. I couldn't say anymore.

I descended the remaining stairs, and headed out into the gray November afternoon.

I was going to end this now. Bella was in pain, and I would now end it. I certainly wouldn't give Thomas Vaughn the opportunity to take it away.

No one else in the history of the world would ever make me feel the way Bella did. I had to believe she felt the same. This was never going to happen for us again.

If I got her back, I would do whatever she wanted. That included making her a vampire. I would do anything. The thought of having her forever, unbreakable and mine, made my breathing quicken and my muscles instinctively tense from the surge of excitement.

Perhaps I had put too much importance on Bella staying human. Even though she had things that I always hoped she would have, why did she look so unhappy? I had watched her closely this last week. I never saw her smile or laugh. There used to be a light that shone from those beautiful dark eyes, now they were dim and troubled. I could tell she wasn't eating well. She also wasn't sleeping well. The circles under her eyes were witness enough, but I would also watch her leave her office after midnight and then wake at 5:00 a.m., sometimes even earlier, and run. To me, she looked lost.

If we weren't meant to be together, then how come my hand fit hers perfectly? I didn't just dream of her being by me, I dreamed of her as my wife. I missed her so strongly that it overshadowed all other emotions. I no longer cared about her blood, or worried I would lose control. I just knew I wanted her. Forever.

There were only two options open to me now. The first, was I would try and win her back, and spend forever with my only love. The second option was, I leave and never go near her again. A third option of watching her like a ghost for the rest of her life loomed out there. I hoped I would be strong enough not to take that option. I walked faster. I didn't need to worry about option two or three. I just had to tell her how I felt, then we could begin to work everything out.

I followed her scent to the Italian restaurant on the corner. Images of La Bella Italia invaded my thoughts. How innocent we both were then. It was hard for me to picture myself innocent about anything, but I was definitely naïve about the precious girl that was sitting across from me in the booth that night. I had no idea how much she would change my existence.

I focused on Thomas and I heard him say that he wanted to take her on five dates and then let her decide if she wanted to keep dating him. I could hear his intentions and they made me sick inside. If she wanted to keep seeing him, he planned on changing the nature of their dating considerably. He wanted them become much more serious. His fantasies of her made me want to kill him.

I stood there in agony waiting for her answer. She paused, but then she gave it to him. She agreed to the five dates, and in turn I felt a knife twist where my heart had once been. I wasn't giving up. I was not going to give her to Thomas. I would fight for her and let her know exactly how I felt.

I then heard Thomas mention my name. _"I am bringing up that Edward guy again." _Again? I wished I had been listening to the first part of their conversation. _Has it been hard to go up against someone you have a history with?" _

She laughed a callous, harsh laugh and said_, "There is no history with Edward Cullen. It didn't even last a year._ _It makes no difference to me. There is nothing special about this fight. He is just like any other adversary I have ever gone up against. He is in my past, and that is where I want him to stay." _

My head fell. I let out a gust of air. For a moment I ws frozen, then I began walking away from the restaurant. I didn't really want to hear anymore.

I had been fooling myself. Everything was as it should be. I knew there was no way that Bella wanted to even be near me now, there was certainly no chance that she wanted to spend eternity with me. It didn't matter that fate may have meant for us to be together, seven years ago I had forced a new outcome for us both. I now had to live with that choice.

I walked away a little too swiftly and I had to adjust my pace. I wanted to get out of range before I was tempted to listen again.

I would tell her. Before this was over, I would tell her I loved her. But for now, I wanted to help her with the pain, in some small way if I could. Perhaps another member of the family needed to come and visit. I knew she was really in there somewhere, but I doubted I was the one that could bring it out again. It needed to be someone that didn't leave Bella feeling threatened, but had always made her laugh. I would take a few days and think it through. If Bella did take our company, it wouldn't change one bit the way I felt about her. I was still determined to tell Bella what she would always mean to me before this was over.

Perhaps having another member of the family here would also help me find a way to get close enough to her that I could tell her.

Option three was getting closer and closer all the time.

I turned and headed down the bleak and windy street.

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**So, who do you think is coming? I will see you tomorrow! You guys are the rockin' best! - edwardsoul**


	9. BLOOD

**Oh man, I can't believe it is 4:00 and I am barely finding time to get this out! Very quickly, I hope that most of you are not going to be disappointed. Hopefully, at the end of this chapter, you will understand my choice of Cullens . . . . . . .**

**I mention the band JET in here. I love them! I do not swear, but JET has a song called "Cold Hard Bitch" obviously, it fits Bella pretty well. I just want to apologize again for the swearing, and hope I don't offend anyone. **

**See ya at the end!**

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**(Bella's POV)**

It was the middle of November and the weather had turned very cold. My lungs burned from breathing in the chilly air. I was running in heavier clothes now, but it usually took about a mile before I warmed up. Every morning I tried to concentrate on the steady rock beat, but I was so caught up in everything with Edward, that it was impossible.

Things with the buy-out had stayed on schedule. I had been meeting regularly with Edward, Jasper, and their lawyers for three weeks. It was the only time I saw him. I made sure of that. Not since that one day had he ever attempted to talk to me outside of the office. I kept trying to tell myself that it was getting easier. It wasn't. On the days I knew I would see him, my heart would start reacting long before our meeting. On the days I didn't see him, I was restless and gloomy.

This morning, I would see him at 9:00 a.m.. I could feel the crunch of the leaves under me as I ran. My legs were weakening and my chest burned, but I couldn't stop running. No matter how far I ran it never felt like enough. It still didn't feel like enough.

As I walked down to the conference room, I gave myself another pep talk. Everyday had been a battle. _No matter what Edward does, do not get angry. Do not let him see you react. Be calm, Bella._

It wasn't that Edward was actually _doing_ anything in the meetings. Aside from his little stunt in our first meeting, he had remained distressingly silent in the conference room.

Silent didn't mean he wasn't active. He spent all his time watching and listening. That brilliant, perfect mind of his was always extremely alert. If I had just met him, I would be impressed and amazed. I would probably also spend all my time staring at him like the female assistants that kept finding excuses to come into the meetings. Each time I found one flirting or staring too long, I removed them immediately. A few had found pink slips in their cubicles at the end of the day. I was taking no chances. I had trained my team as well as could be expected without actually telling them there were two vampires in the room. But, it had been a battle every time we met.

Just as I turned the corner to the conference room, I got a text message. I rarely used them. I preferred to yell at people in person. I looked down at the screen and the tension momentarily melted away.

"Hey Bells. Just wanted to say Hi. Miss you. J"

It was from Jake. I hadn't talked to him since he called on my birthday. I walked into the room and I was still smiling. I looked up to see Edward first look at my face, and then he began staring intently at my phone. _Don't tell me you can read phones too,_ I thought. I pushed my phone down into the pocket of my briefcase and wiped the smile off my face. I laid everything down on the table and greeted the group. I glanced at Harry Banks and his face was red. The vein in his head was bulging and he was in a fury. Apparently, something I had done had pushed him over the top. I had that affect on people.

"Ms. Swan, what is the meaning of calling the head of production in C- CORP'S Belgian branch and offering him a higher position if he stays on after the takeover?"

Ah, a particularly clever move if you ask me.

"Does that upset you, Mr. Banks?" I asked innocently.

"It amounts to bribery, Ms. Swan." he said accusingly.

I laughed condescendingly. "Bribery? I am sorry, but I believe you have the word _bribery_ confused with _strategy_. He is an able employee and I want to see the business continue to succeed after we acquire it."

"Moving a little fast, aren't we, Ms. Swan?" A velvet voice spoke softly. I froze for a moment. That voice made all others sound weak and coarse by comparison. I clenched my teeth and mentally shook myself.

_Remember our little pep talk out in the hall, Bella! _I tried to calm myself. It didn't work.

I enunciated every word as I stared at him and said, "Well, I don't have the luxury of moving slowly. Life is short. We all only get one lifetime so I intend on making the most of mine. It isn't like we are going to live forever now, is it Mr. Cullen?"

Jasper let out an exasperated sigh and hunched down in his seat. Edward's response was unexpected. He didn't say or do anything, he just swallowed hard and held my gaze. His eyes held me riveted to my spot. The electric current passing between us refused to fade. We both stared at each other unrelentingly. I had to open my mouth to get more air into my lungs.

At that moment, there was a knock at the conference room door. I had made arrangements for breakfast to be brought in. Sort of a goodwill gesture on my part. The cart was wheeled in with danishes, muffins and juice.

The assistants were laying everything on the buffet table in the corner when one of the assistants backed up and hit the cart. It tipped over onto an assistant standing on the other side of the cart, and all the glasses slid off with one breaking on her leg and cutting her badly.

As I saw the blood begin to run down her leg, I stood up anxiously. All I could think was that Jasper was in the room. I knew what happened at a paper cut. This was much worse. My head swung wildly to Jasper, I saw him take one look at Edward and excuse himself as he calmly, but swiftly walked out of the room. I turned to Edward with my eyes anxious and I saw that he had stopped breathing. He just looked at me and nodded reassuringly. I breathed a sigh of relief and then I looked back at the door staring wide-eyed. Jasper had calmly walked out of the room. He had been working very hard. I was proud of him.

I relaxed back into my seat thinking the worst was over until two men from my team helped the assistant sit down in a chair right behind me. They were grabbing napkins and pressing them against her leg. I could smell the salt and rust permeate my nostrils and it headed straight for my stomach.

I swallowed hard and put my cold water bottle up to my forehead, but nothing seemed to help. I was breathing out of my mouth, but I felt green clear to my toes. The room seemed to get blurry around the edges and everything started to sound far away. The room went sideways and then, I felt two cold marble arms catch me and lift me as he carried me out of the room.

Right next door was an empty conference room and he held me with one arm as he glided through the opened door and locked it behind us. He found a chair and sat down gently as he held me tight to him. I knew I should pull away, but I moved in and relaxed against his chest. I took deep gulps of the clear air to stop the nausea, but it also had another result. I could smell him. I had been trying so hard not to get close enough to him that I could smell him.

I knew if I opened my eyes that this little dream would have to end. So, I closed my eyes and made a memory that even when I was 92 I would remember.

I felt his strong arms holding me. The strongest the world ever knew. I always felt so safe in his arms. I would get lost in his touch every time he held me. I had no idea how many times I had fallen asleep in the arms of this angel, but his were the only arms I would ever want to hold me through the night.

I thought of how when I was nestled this close to his chest that I could never hear his heartbeat, but my heart, just like now, had always pounded hard enough for both of us.

This would never happen for me again.

There was a time that I was lost in him. Now, I was lost in a much different way.

I couldn't do this to myself any longer.

My eyes slowly fluttered open and he was staring at me with his dark ocher eyes that seemed to be asking a question to which he desperately wanted to know the answer.

"Thank you, I feel better," I whispered roughly.

He swallowed hard and brought his hand up to brush my hair off my cheek, and his fingers lightly brushed my face. His eyes were still boring hard into mine. This was all such a dream to me that I forgot that the last seven years had happened. I was right back there. I was the girl that desperately longed for his touch. That sighed with delight when his fingertips even brushed across my face and made my cheek burn. That blushed when he just looked at me. Why did he have to leave me?

He brought his forehead down to touch my own and I heard myself moan slightly. _Oh Edward, I love you so_. I wanted to wrap my arms as tightly as I could around his neck and pull him to me and make him admit that it was a mistake. I wanted him to tell me that he really loved me all along and then I wanted him to promise he would never leave me again. When I went for a fantasy, I really went the distance.

I had to get away from him. This kind of memory I could not have. It would do the kind of damage to my wall that I wasn't sure I could fix. I held on one second longer, and then I did what I had to. I had to save myself.

I pulled away and I felt him sigh. I stood up and he said warmly, "Are you feeling better?"

"Aside from the fact that a vampire handled the scent of blood better than I did, then yes, I am just fine," I said it as lightly as I could manage.

He smiled his crooked smile and I literally felt a stab in my middle. I backed up from him and stumbled to the door. I reached to unlock it when Edward placed his cold hand on mine to stop me.

"Bella wait." His face was warm and fervent and he seemed to take a breath for courage. "Please, can I see you tonight? Can we go somewhere just the two of us and talk?"

"No, Edward." I couldn't believe I was saying this.

"Why won't you see me? Why won't you be alone with me?" He pleaded. "There are some things I need to tell you, Bella. I promise everything will be allright."

I started backing up from him. He watched me, then he took a step toward me. I put out my hands to stop him.

I made my voice forceful. "You have to stay away from me, Edward." My hands were shaking as I held them out in front of me. I was madly searching for an argument that would keep him from getting any closer to me.

"Look," I breathed unevenly. "I'll make you a deal. I won't pull any more stunts like making you eat the world's largest steak, but only if you promise that you won't talk to me anymore, that you'll just ignore me in these meetings and then leave as soon as all our negotiations have ended."

His face froze in shock. His eyes tightened with pain. "Bella, come with me tonight. I don't care where, anywhere you want and I promise that I won't even bring up C - CORP once. I just want to talk to you . . ."

"No." I interrupted him. I shook my head emphatically.

He took another step towards me and I panicked.

"Please," I looked at him with pleading in my face, "Please, you have to quit trying to talk to me." I swallowed hard and whispered, "Just let it go, please."

He gently took my hand and pulled me to him, but as he started to say something, there was a hard knock at the door. It felt like the door was being rattled off its hinges. That cold hand in mine felt so good. It seemed it was where my hand belonged. The knock came again, even louder. I jumped and slowly pulled away from Edward, then I walked to the door and tentatively opened it. My eyes opened wide.

"Bella!" A voice boomed at me and I was suddenly caught in a massive bear hug. I was lifted off the floor and held tight to a monster of a man with a boyish grin and curly dark hair.

"Emmett!" I managed, "It's so good to see you!" I was so surprised to see him.

He released me and I filled my lungs greedily with air as I said, "I can't believe it's you." I got tears in my eyes and threw my arms around his thick neck. He swung me around and I laughed harder than I'd laughed in seven years.

"Emmett," Edward said flatly. "I thought you weren't coming until tomorrow."

He looked brightly at Edward and said, "I found an earlier flight. It's good to see you, brother."

A few men were out in the hall watching the scene with surprised faces. Simmons came out of the conference room and when he saw Emmett swinging me, he stumbled to a stop. He looked up and down Emmett's trunk of a body and his mouth dropped open as he began to speak.

"Holy Sh . ."

"Simmons!" I said interrupting him. "This is Emmett Hale. Another member of C- CORP." Simmons stood warily in front of him and looked up and down with wide eyes. Emmett put me down and stuck his hand out to him. Simmons held out his hand while staring at his rippling chest. He winced as his hand met with Emmett's in an apparent vice grip.

"Nice to meet you," Emmett boomed.

"Same here," Simmons said while massaging his hand.

Emmett turned back to me and grabbed me by the shoulders. "Bella, you're hot!" He said this while holding me out from him to get a better look. "Edward, doesn't she look amazing?"

Edward opened his mouth to answer, but I interrupted him.

"Emmett, we are right in the middle of a meeting. Come back in with us," I said quickly.

I tried to regain my composure. My face felt clammy and I was dizzy and weak, but not from the smell of blood. We began walking back into the conference room and I was acutely aware of Edward walking only mere inches behind me.

Simmons turned to me, "Bella, are you okay?"

I shook my head and said, "Yes, I get a little sick when I smell blood."

Emmett turned to me. "You get sick when you smell blood?" His booming laughter filled the hallway. "Oh, Bella. I forgot how funny you were." He turned back to Edward. "Why did you ever let this one go, bro?"

I didn't turn my head to see Edward's reaction, instead I cleared my throat and shakily said, "Emmett, can you stay?"

"Hell yeah! Sorry I wasn't here on time, my plane was delayed." I think everyone on the 42nd floor heard him.

I grabbed his arm with both of my hands, and I still couldn't get all the way around his bicep. I gave him a squeeze and said, "I've missed you."

He gave me a huge smile, and pulled me to him as we walked back into the conference room.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

After the meeting, Emmett was at my side in less than a second. "Bella, come to a club with me tonight." His face was so luminous.

How could I say no to that face? Still, a club?

"I . . . what I mean is . . . I don't really go to clubs, Emmett."

He put his trunk of an arm around my shoulder and said, "That's because I wasn't here to invite you. Come on, it will be so fun!"

"I don't think . . "

"He put his face next to my ear and said, "Please? I promise I won't let you do anything human, like fall down."

Not even my big strong wall could keep out Emmett. I smiled. "Okay, if you promise it's just you."

He looked at me puzzled. Then recognition ran across his face. "Oh, you mean not bring Edward." He twisted his face as he said, "Trust me, I went to a club with Edward once. I'm never doing that again. He's no fun at all, he wouldn't even let me drink."

All of the sudden, I heard a deep snarl from around the corner. Emmett let out an exasperated sigh. "Fine, I won't drink, Geez!" He had turned his head to Edward, who was apparently listening around the corner. He turned back to me and said, "We are going to have so much fun, Bella. I can't wait to take a hot girl like you out on the town."

I laughed and rolled my eyes. "What time, are you going to pick me up?"

"How about 9:00?" He said with a huge smile on his face.

"See you then," I gave him a quick peck on the cheek. "I have to get back to my office," I said with a sigh.

"Okay," he said while backing up. "See ya tonight!"

I went into my office with a smile on my face, until I shut the door. I slammed my briefcase on my desk. That conniving little vampire. Edward was trying a new tactic. He knew I had a soft spot for Emmett. Did he think that if I spent time with Emmett that I would unwittingly divulge secrets about my strategy? Did he think that Emmett could dazzle me into giving up my designs on C- CORP? Wherever Emmett and I went tonight, I knew that Edward would not be far behind. My eyes narrowed as a plan began to form in my head.

"Edward, watch and learn," I muttered. "Watch and learn."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The lobby bell rang at exactly 9:00. I grabbed the phone and said, "Come on up Emmett." This vampire would always be welcome in my place. I looked in the mirror again for one last appraising look.

I had left work a little early and stopped at one of those shops I always walked past without looking in. I had labeled them "fun girl stores". I had never planned on going into one. I bought a pair of the tightest jeans I could find. I had to admit they made my behind look pretty darn good! I found a blood red satin halter top that came to just the top of my jeans, and the coolest pair of black boots that ended just below my knees and had a really high heel. The salesgirl told me it was the perfect outfit for a New York nightclub. I supposed I would have to take her word on that.

I heard the doorbell and ran, cautiously in my fun-girl boots, to let Emmett in. When I opened the door, he whistled. He looked me up and down very slowly. "Damn, Bella. We are going to have so much fun tonight."

I grabbed my jacket and my small handbag as Emmett impatiently pulled me out the door. While we were in the elevator, I had a chance to look at him. He was wearing a pair of black slacks that were obviously tailored exclusively for him and they fit him perfectly. He had on a thin black sweater that fit him snugly across his chest. It was a v-neck, and it showed his beautiful smooth pale skin that was pulled tight over his muscled neck and collarbone.

"You don't look too bad yourself there, Mister," I said while elbowing him in the side. He laughed playfully and grabbed me and started gracefully dancing me around the elevator. "We are going to Northsix," he said in his low velvet voice.

I raised my eyebrows in admiration. Northsix was a very exclusive club for only the very elite social scene of New York society. It was usually where the paparazzi got all their pictures of celebrities at night. I should have known that only a Cullen could figure out how to get into such a place.

"You are going to love it!" He said very enthusiastically. "Jet is playing there tonight. You don't even want to know how I got my tickets."

I tried to sound impressed. The only time I listened to music was running with my i-pod. I had no idea who Jet was. Sometimes I heard music in the elevator, but I doubted Jet's songs were playing in there.

His rented black Ferrari pulled up in front of Northsix and a valet met us at the curb. Emmett came around to help me out and we walked into a very dark and loud nightclub. I knew there wasn't a chance that Emmett and I were here unchaperoned. I instantly began scanning the room for a breathtakingly beautiful, bronze haired god of a vampire, but I figured that he was probably not out in plain sight. If anyone could hide silently and undetected, it was Edward.

Emmett took my hand as we went to the coat check where we left my purse and jacket and then he led me out on the floor. The band all had dark shoulder length hair. The lead singer had on big dark glasses. It was a fast song and he pulled me to him and began moving to the beat.

"What's this song called?" I yelled over the music.

He smiled and said, "It's called "Cold Hard Bitch." I nodded my head in satisfaction. I put my arms around his neck and tried hard to follow his moves and not pay attention to the voice screaming in my head that I didn't dance, and that the last time I tried I was in a heavy cast at the prom with a very different vampire.

We danced a few fast songs and I was out of breath. A slow song blared out next and Emmett pulled me closer to him and he smiled a huge smile as he ran his cold hands down the skin on my back.

"Emmett, you are very naughty," I teased while shaking my head. "What would Rosalie say if she saw you dancing with me this way."

"Your skin is very warm, did you know that?" He bent down and muttered into my ear.

"I think I recall hearing that before," I said dryly.

He smiled and held me while we danced the rest of the song in silence and then I told him I needed to sit out a few songs and get a drink. We walked around until he picked out a very private booth. He sat me down and came back with a sparkling water and a Coke.

"Two drinks?" I questioned.

He looked at me sheepishly and said, "Well, I don't know how much humans drink and I thought maybe it should look like I needed one too."

I smiled and moved over so he could slide in. He slid in far enough that there was not one inch of space between us. I wondered if this was really part of Edward's plan, for Emmett to be me this close to me.

Our arms were rubbing against each other as I turned my head and said, "So what have you been doing for the last seven years?"

"Well," he began, "We all moved to New Jersey and attended Princeton. Carlisle works at Johns Hopkins and recently began teaching there. He is doing lectures in Europe at the moment."

"Did you all go to school?" I was trying to show my interest in all the family and not just a particular member.

He nodded his head. "We all received new degrees, Rosalie in Biology, Alice and Jasper in Economics, and I got my Masters in International Law." He didn't mention one certain brother.

I asked as nonchalantly as possible. "So, what was Edward's major?"

He looked around nervously as he said, "Oh, he didn't really attend school with us." A fast song began playing. He smiled brightly and slid out of the booth, then he put out his hand and said, "This is one of my favorite songs, we _have_ to dance."

I took a big drink and smiled as he grabbed my hand and a blaring beat began pounding through the room. It was "Are you Gonna Be my Girl" by Jet.

"_1,2,3, take your hand and come with me, _

_Because you Look so fine, _

_That I really wanna make you mine."_

The words were vibrating through my ears as Emmett pulled me to him and rested his large hands on my hips. I put my hands on his shoulders and we moved to the heavy beat. The chorus began,

_Big black boots, _

_Long brown hair,_

_She's so sweet with her,_

_Jet black stare._

He ran his hands through my hair and down my back. The song began going faster and faster and then the music stopped as the song yelled out, _"Are you Gonna Be My Girl?"_

Suddenly he grabbed my hand and rolled me out from him and then pulled me back hard and close. I was amazed at what a good dancer he was. Besides being very graceful, he had the moves. He had his hands on my hips guiding me through all his steps as the words screamed in our heads. As soon as the song ended, another began. It was a slow song and Emmett took my arms and placed them around his neck and began moving slowly on the dance floor.

His cold, very large, rock hard chest was right at my eye level and I rested my cheek there . The club was very warm, and his cold chest felt so good. I closed my eyes and then realized that a love song was playing. This was going to be very hard to concentrate on dancing to the beat, and not listening to the music all at the same time.

Emmett felt me tense up and he pulled me back to look at me. "You okay, Bella?"

"I'm fine." Even a dumb human wouldn't have believed me. I didn't stand a chance against a smart vampire.

He ran his hand over my cheek. "He was an idiot to leave you," he said softly.

I felt a sob escape my lips and I blinked furiously. "Actually, it was probably the smartest thing he ever did." I said flatly.

He just held my cheek in his hand and shook his head. Could this be part of Edward's plan? I narrowed my eyes slightly. I needed to get my head back in the game.

I pulled myself closer and began playing with the curls at the base of his neck. "You know, there is one part of my fairy tale that can still come true," I whispered into his ear.

"Oh yeah? What part is that?" He genuinely seemed interested.

"I can still become a vampire," I purred right into his ear.

He stopped dancing and pulled back slowly and stared at me. He seemed to be trying to read if I was serious or not. Finally, the corner of his mouth turned up and there was a smile in his eye.

"You are still diabolical, Bella. You had me going for a minute there."

I began playing with the hair on the back of his neck again. I pulled myself as close as I could to him and whispered, "I was being completely serious."

His eyes widened and for once, Emmett was speechless. I put my mouth up to his ear and blew out warm air and touched my lips slightly to his neck as I said, "Please, Emmett."

His body became completely tense. His arms were circled tight around my waist. I couldn't move. I took his face in both of my hands and brought his mouth down to my neck as I moved my head slightly to the side. "Just one little bite," I begged.

I heard a growl in his bulging chest, then there was a sound of two boulders slamming hard into each other - and he was gone.

My eyes blinked hard and I found him lying on the floor. "Geez bro, it took you long enough," he said sarcastically.

"Don't you touch her!" It was Edward. He was crouched down in front of me with his lip curled up and his razor sharp teeth clacking. It was exactly how he had stood when he protected me in that field when James saw me for the first time. I could see his muscles tense as he prepared to spring on Emmett again. His eyes were bright with rage and his eerily beautiful face was focused on Emmett.

The song was just ending as Jasper joined us, and I was suddenly aware that a circle had formed around us. Every time Emmett made the smallest move, Edward answered it by adjusting his position in front of me. He growled as Emmett tried to stand up and I knew I had to do something. As much as I wanted Edward this close to me, I realized I needed to put a stop to this before the Cullen boys exposed themselves to the New York night club scene.

I slowly reached around Edward and put my hand out to Emmett. "Sorry about that Emmett," I gestured my head towards Edward. "I was just trying to get our chaperone out of the shadows." Edward straightened as shocked recognition spread across his face.

Emmett started laughing. He was still laughing as he stood up holding tight to my hand.

"Nice one, Bella." Emmett laughed admiringly.

The crowd began to thin and lose interest as Emmett picked me up around the legs and lifted me up high and howled, "I knew we would have fun tonight, Bella!"

Edward got right in his face and I leaned down to hear what he was saying. "You're having a little _too_ much fun, Emmett." He said angrily.

Emmett put me down gently and scoffed at him and said, "You've been around her for a month and you haven't tried anything, why can't_ I_ play around with her a little bit?"

Edward turned towards me and his eyes were dark and enraged. He swallowed hard and his face calmed down slightly as he said, "Excuse us Bella, I need to speak to Emmett alone."

Before I could answer, he was pushing Emmett off the dance floor. As they were moving away from me and into the shadows, Edward grabbed his sweater and I heard him say, "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

I suddenly felt extreme calm warm my body. I turned my head to Jasper and said, "It isn't me you should be worried about, maybe you should go work your magic on your brothers."

Jasper chuckled and said, "I am not going anywhere near them right now."

I laughed as I nodded my head and gestured for him to follow me.

As we moved off the dance floor, I put my head down, walking with a red face to the booth where Emmett and I had been sitting. I supposed the reason everyone's eyes were on me was because they were trying to figure out why two breathtakingly beautiful men were fighting over me, and another was following me to a dark and private table.

"We haven't had much chance to talk have we?" I offered in a friendly voice.

Jasper grinned as he said, "Well, I don't think Edward or I wanted to spend the night in jail."

I looked at him unapologetically. "Well, I'll let it slide this once. Besides, in a few minutes Emmett and I will be gone and you and Edward can stay here all night if you want." I put my face closer to his and narrowed my eyes. "Just as long as you don't follow us anymore."

Jasper's mouth twitched as he said, "Well, I will pass the message on, but I can assure you we won't be staying here. Edward hates these kind of places, and the girls here in New York are extremely aggressive." He laughed and said, "They aren't taking no for an answer."

"Would Alice be mad if she knew you were here?" I asked.

He shook his head. "I am not the one they are foaming at the mouth for, it's Edward."

I swallowed hard and took a deep breath. I could hardly blame the New York girls for taking a chance. I would never have the guts to try, I was painfully aware that our spheres were still nowhere close to touching. I turned my head away from Jasper and let my eyes rest on Edward for a moment. I could never look at him while we were in the conference room. I spent all my time trying to look anywhere but at him.

They were clear across the room, but it was easy to see that Edward was angry. He was gesturing wildly and sticking his finger in Emmett's face. He had to know that Emmett wouldn't change me on the dance floor. Why would he even care what happened, or if I did become a vampire? He was dead set against it before, but that was when we were together. This was all my fault, not Emmett's. I tried to squelch it, but my anger got the best of me. My eyes narrowed and I got up and began stomping over to the two Greek gods. I ignored the one behind me trying to get me to come back and sit down.

As I got closer, I could hear them talking. Through clenched teeth Edward hissed, "You were just supposed to cheer her up, not seduce her!"

Emmett smiled mischievously. "She seemed pretty cheered up to me, bro."

Edward pushed him hard in the chest. The blow would have knocked a hole in a brick wall, but Emmett didn't even flinch.

"I'm taking her home, Emmett," he said through clenched teeth.

"No way," Emmett said with a twisted laugh.

Edward's arms were flexing with fury. "I want you to keep your hands off Bella."

Emmett raised his eyebrows and said, "Hey, I will try but, what am I supposed to do about her hands being all over _me_."

Edward's eyes grew murderous and he opened his mouth to tell Emmett off once more when I stepped in.

I put my hand on Edward's marble arm and felt my sharp intake of air. My heart rate accelerated immediately. Edward's face turned to me instantly, his eyes warm and gentle.

"First of all," I began, "Emmett and I are big kids and we don't need you watching over us, and secondly, as much as I love seeing Emmett, I don't need you to send any more of your family to try and cheer me up. I don't need cheering up, I'm just fine, thank you very much."

Emmett looked around Edward's shoulder and said, "It's cool, Bella. My brother here is still a little high strung. Seven years of solitude haven't seemed to relax him in the slightest. He's just a little freaked out because he thought I was about to make you a vampire."

Emmett's face showed mock fear as he looked at Edward.

I shot a look at Edward. Seven years of solitude? Why had Edward been alone ever since he left me? Did it mess him up that badly to be with a human? Was he tired of his family? Was he mad because Alice and possibly Emmett were mad at him for the way he left me? Hot tears were finding their way to the surface. They were full of embarrassment and frustration as I looked at Edward and, "Yeah . . . I haven't forgotten how the idea of me becoming a vampire always repulsed you."

Edward froze. He took his hands off Emmett and turned fully towards me. His eyes were rich and golden and they held a look of complete sincerity. He grabbed me firmly by the shoulders and pulled me closer to him so that I could hear him over the blaring music, then his velvet voice swam in my ear.

"Bella, you have to know that I was never repulsed by anything where you were concerned. It was me Bella. I was the one that . . ."

Suddenly, behind me, a high pitched nasal voice cut through the music.

"Eddie, I've been looking all over for you."

Edward looked over my head and winced. I turned to look behind me and saw a beautiful tall blond in tighter jeans than mine and a hot pink sequin tube top twirling a piece of hair and gesturing with her finger for Edward to come over to her.

I slowly turned away as a pang of jealousy cut through me. She was definitely closer to his sphere than I was. My eyes lingered on Edward's face and he looked away from the blond and back down at me. His face was so close that if I stood on my tiptoes our lips would have been touching. I realized that he was still holding on to my shoulders. I pulled out of his grasp and stepped back slightly.

Emmett came and took my hand and looked at Edward as he said, "Have fun, _Eddie_. See ya back at the hotel, don't wait up for me." He pulled me towards the entrance then, and as I looked back I saw the tall blond taking my spot right in front of Edward.

- - - - - - - - -

Emmett helped me on with my jacket as we waited on the sidewalk for the car. "Don't worry about the blond," he said assuredly.

I blinked in surprise and looked up at him.

"What?" I asked.

"Edward has already told her to get lost and he and Jasper will be back at the hotel within the hour."

I felt a thrill of relief run through me, and I did my best to squelch it.

"Edward can do whatever he wants, that was all a long time ago," I cleared my throat and shrugged down further into my coat.

The car came around the corner and Emmett helped me in. When he got around to his side he accelerated out into traffic and said, "Now, what do you want to do?"

I smiled and said, "You're not mad at me for tricking you in there and getting you in trouble with Edward?"

He snorted in derision and said, "First of all, you didn't trick me. And second of all, Edward is not the boss of me. Besides, I could take him."

I twisted so that I was facing him in the seat. "I didn't trick you?" I asked surprisingly.

He looked at me and grinned. When his dimples showed like that, he looked just like a little boy. A mischievous little boy. "I was on to you, Bella. I knew you were aware that Edward would follow us, and I knew you would have a plan." He chuckled. "Besides, I was implementing my own little plan."

My eyebrows furrowed. "Your own plan, what was your plan?"

Emmett watched the road thoughtfully. "Let's just say, that I was trying to force his hand."

"Force his hand? Why?" I was completely confused.

Emmett ran his hand through his hair. "It didn't work as well as I'd hoped." He looked at me and grinned. "New topic of conversation, please."

I stared at him thoughtfully. "Emmett . . . I . . ." I bit my lip as I decided whether or not it was wise to ask him a certain question.

"Spit it out, Bella. You can say anything." His face was completely open, and it encouraged me.

I took a deep breath and plunged in. "Why hasn't Edward been with all of you for the last seven years?"

I saw him cringe slightly. His face fell a little, and he said, "I guess you can talk to me about _almost_ anything."

My heart fell. My mind hit on a hundred things Edward could have been doing the last seven years, all of them causing pain through my middle.

I looked forward at the road and said softly, "He fell in love with another vampire, didn't he." It was a statement not a question. I felt my middle splitting open. It was better that I finally knew the truth so that I could salvage some sort of life for myself.

Emmett started laughing. His laugh was musical and all silver, like a wind chime. He looked at me and said, "Hell no!" He saw something in my eyes that forced him to be serious. He cleared his throat and said softly, "Bella, I can't talk to you about this. It is Edward's place to talk to you about it, if he ever gets up the courage." He said the last part under his breath in a disgusted tone.

He looked at me again and said, "He should definitely be talking to you instead of spending all his days on that stupid piano writing that song."

"What song?" I used to love to watch Edward play the piano. It was one of the few times his face was seemed free of sorrow and worry.

He just blew out a disgusted blast of air and rolled his eyes. "Never mind," he groaned.

He looked back at me again and said, "I will say this." We were weaving in and out of traffic and he had the same terrifying habit as Edward of not ever watching the road. He looked right in my eyes as he said, "Things are not as they seem. Don't be too hard on the guy."

I looked at him for a moment longer and then sunk down into my seat. I stared straight ahead completely confused and nowhere nearer to an answer than before we had spoken.

"You're not going to tell me anything else?" I tried to make my voice sound pathetic, might as well play on his sympathies.

"You forget," he teased, "I am married to Rosalie. There is not one female trick you can try that she has not perfected over the last 70 years."

I had to laugh. He was right. I looked at the clock on the dashboard. It was only 10:30 on a Friday night in Manhattan.

"Emmett, we are in the city that never sleeps! This is the perfect city for you! What do you want to do?" I again turned my whole body towards him and leaned in closer to show my enthusiasm.

His face looked like a child trying to choose candy at the candy store. He pursed his lips as he was deep in thought, and then suddenly his eyes brightened.

"Hey! I know, let's go check out the Empire State Building!"

I laughed. That was a total Emmett thing. I nodded my head and he turned around and headed East.

When we got there, we saw a big line that formed half way down the block to get in. My shoulders fell. "We may not get in Emmett. They close the line at 11:00 and we will be too far back to get in the doors."

He raised his eyebrow at me and said quietly, "Clearly, you haven't spent much time around vampires lately." He looked around and then whispered, "Climb on my back."

I climbed on as I laughed quietly. He casually backed up against the wall next to the entrance, and then suddenly, he was running. Everything was a massive blur and then we stopped. I blinked my eyes to get my bearings and I saw that we were in a stairwell. I looked up and as far as I could see, there were just more and more flights of stairs.

"We are going to climb the stairs of the Empire State Building?" I asked in wonder.

He laughed heartily making his dimples deepen in his face. "What's this 'we' stuff? You want to walk up by yourself?" he joked.

I looked up through the staircase again. I shook my head mightily. "No way!"

"Hold on," he breathed. And then we were off. As I laid my head on his back, I thought of all the times I had done this with Edward. From the first time in the meadow, to that perfect rainy summer when he would take me deep into the woods with him. It would seem that we were the only two people in the world. Thankfully, I didn't have long to reminisce. In less than a minute, we were at the top.

We blended into the crowd and made our way outside. As Emmett and I looked out over the view, he said, "This looks a lot different than when I was here 60 years ago." I just took his arm and laid my head on his shoulder and laughed.

Whatever Edward's ulterior motives actually were, I was very happy I got to spend the evening with this particular vampire.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

**I just love Emmett! Please tell me your opinion of Emmett and this chapter. Am I staying true to character? See ya tomorrow!**


	10. CLUE, ANGEL

**Wow!!!!! I thought for sure all of you were going to yell at me and say, "We wanted Alice!" I cringed when I hit the add button to submit the chapter. You were all very forgiving. You guys rock more than I can possibly even begin to say. It kinda chokes me up.**

**Some of you didn't think Emmett acted in character. I understand. It was kinda pushing it, but I would love to see how Emmett acts when Rosalie isn't around. Not that he would be unfaithful, (and he wasn't being unfaithful here). I just feel like Rosalie reigns him in much of the time. He is just such a big playful, big brother like, teddy bear. He is also smart and clever. In Midnight Sun, Edward says that Emmett wouldn't think one thing that he wouldn't say or do out loud. I loved writing him into the story.**

**Okay . . . . .do you guys think you could indulge me with one more chapter of Edward's POV? This is THE transition chapter. From here on out, things will be better. There will be much more . . .oh, I can't give it away. Just please, would you stay with me for one more sorrowful, longing kind of chapter? There were a few more things that had to happen.**

**Some of you have asked how many chaps there are. Originally, there were like 25. Everytime there is a dotted dividing line when you are reading, that was a new chapter. But you guys have been so amazing and some have even commented that they liked the longer chapters that I began combining them. There are like 3 or 4 more chapters.**

**I combined two chapters here. They just go together too much to break it into two days. There is a song before ANGEL. My 14 year old sister said, "WHY are you listening to stupid opera music?" This is not opera. I saw this cd at a friend's house and there was a song on it called, "Angel Passing Through My Room" and I thought of Edward. Then I heard the words . . . . please read them. You will be amazed. It even says Twilight like three times in the song. **

**P.S. Thanks to Black Daylight for the suggestion of where to go on their date!**

**See ya at the end!**

**- - - - - - - - - - -  
**

**Edward's POV**

Okay, I realized that I made another mistake. I never should have asked Emmett to come to New York. I should have known that he wouldn't treat it seriously. That was a very long night. Emmett didn't come back until 3:30 in the morning. Whether or not he made Bella smile, it was going to take me 1,000 years to blot out the image of Emmett holding Bella that close to him. And the way he placed his hands on her hips . . . he was lucky I didn't tear him apart. He defended himself by saying he was helping. That was not the kind of help I expected from my own brother. His claim that he was just trying to prove a point and give me courage was so idiotic that I didn't even know what to say to him. He seemed to be having fun with all of this. I should have asked Alice. All she would have done is take Bella shopping. If he didn't go home within the week, I was going to ask Rosalie to come here and get him.

Now, I had other worries.

The last week had been a morbid form of torture. Vaughn had taken Bella on two dates in one week. I abhorred with everything in me seeing her with Thomas. But, I also loved watching her when she wasn't so guarded, as she was when she was around me. The part I detested and feared the most, was that with each date, they seemed to be getting closer and closer. Vaughn's feelings for Bella were nowhere close to the intensity of my feelings for her, but they were indeed very strong. He was playing his game well, trying to lure her in slowly so that she wouldn't run. Much to my distress, it appeared to be working.

He'd had a home game this last Sunday and he was honored with MVP. He was feeling pretty good about things. On their dates, autograph seekers would approach them and Thomas would always graciously comply. I wondered how Bella felt about that. With me, she was doomed to no sunlight, only shadows. Secrecy was a way with my kind. Here, she was thrust into the spotlight. I wondered if she would prefer this life with Thomas to constant evasion.

Tonight was their third date. He took her to the American Ballet Theatre and when they came out, he kissed her forehead longingly and gave her a ballet shoe covered in diamonds and attached it to her bracelet. I wondered how many more charms would be added.

This was getting to be too much for me. I needed more than to just be a shadow in her life. I had to have a tie to her in some way. She didn't want me, I had accepted that, but an idea had been playing in my head. Maybe if I stayed here after negotiations had ended, I could become her friend. Then, it wouldn't be such a strange thing if she bumped into me every once in a while. We could see each other every now and then. I could hear her voice and still look into her beautiful eyes and hear her laugh. I would still be able to hear her heartbeat. I would stay and be whatever she wanted me to be. She could have any part of me that she wanted.

I would be there when she had children. I could be there for all the major events of her life and cheer her on and encourage her. And when she became old I would still be able to take of her in some small way. And when she eventually, inevitably . . . . I couldn't even think it. When she died . . . . . I would be there. I would be there to hear the last beat from the most beautiful heart the world would ever know. I would follow. I would find her.

Vaughn then took her to Tavern On the Green. I had always wanted to take her to that restaurant that was tucked into a corner of Central Park. They had a long, quiet dinner and then they went on a carriage ride through the Park. Just two more dates, and then Vaughn would ask her the question. I couldn't imagine at this point, that she wouldn't accept him, and everything that would surely come with it.

It was a cold night, and they were huddled close to each other and sharing a large, thick blanket. In Thomas' mind I could see him looking down on her. Her chestnut hair nestled close to his cheek. His thoughts were troubled. My brow furrowed as I listened to the question he wanted to ask her. It didn't make sense to me. Suddenly he said, _"Bella, something has been eating away at me. There is an image of you that I can't get out of my head and I need to ask you a question. I promise I won't bring this up again. If it's too personal or too soon for me to ask yet, just tell me, okay_?" He seemed nervous as to what her answer would be.

"_Okay,_" she said. Her voice was muffled under the blanket.

"_Is there a part of you that is still in love with Edward Cullen?"_ He was in torment waiting for her response. I already knew the answer. I cringed inwardly and waited for her to reply.

It took her a moment to answer. When she began to speak, her voice was soft and serious. _"Do you have anyone from your past that you can't forget?"_

He felt uncomfortable for a moment and then I saw the face of an attractive teenage girl with long black hair in his mind.

"_Well, there was this one girl that I dated all through my Junior year of High School that I think about now and then. She moved away and I never heard from her again."_

Bella answered back after letting out a sigh. _"That is exactly what Edward_ _was to me. He was my first love . . .and then he left."_

Through Thomas I saw deep pain in her eyes. It was the pain Jasper had told me about. She had never let me see it. She swallowed hard and said quietly, _"It was hard,_ _but I found my way again_. _Time has a way of slowly forcing_ _you to accept and move on." _

"_So, you have moved on?" _He was encouraged.

He eyes looked haunted_. "That party at the Waldorf was the first time I had seen him in seven years. _She closed her eyes for a moment and then said,_ "He had told me he loved me so many times, and then everything changed. He told me I was no good for him. He promised me I would never see him again." _Her eyes tightened painfully. She swallowed hard and then said,_ "I was just taken a little off guard that night. I am doing_ _much better now."_ She had a faraway look in her eyes.

Thomas was almost ebullient in his relief at her answer. He believed her. He didn't see what I saw in her eyes.

"_Can I ask you one_ _more question?" _Bella nodded her head.

"_You said Edward told you he loved you. Is Edward still in love with you?"_ He was nervous again.

Without pausing, she answered him, emphasizing each word with conviction. _"He never loved me."_ I felt all the air escape out of my lungs as I tensed with astonishment.

"_Are you sure?"_ He asked. She had seemed so sure of herself. I was surprised Thomas doubted her answer. He bit his lip and said, _"I saw the way he looked at you at that party, and at your office."_

Bella tried to speak, but her voice broke, finally she said, _"If there is one thing I am sure of this in this world, it's that Edward Cullen doesn't love me now, and he didn't love me then. I was nothing more than a simple diversion to him."_

I sat on the cold snowy ground and put my head in my hands. All this time, she had really believed it. There were sobs finding their way out of my chest. I clenched my teeth and snarled at myself.

Through my mind came the scene I had played a million times. I watched her eyes dim and desperation take on a life of its own as I stood there behind her house and told her I was leaving without her, promising I'd never come back. I had said I would always love her, in a way, but that I would have plenty of distractions. I had told her that where I was going was not for her. Two miles away from her I had collapsed on the ground and curled in on myself to fight the pain, but she never knew that. She had spent the last seven years in her own hell, just like me. I was the only one that could have fixed it. Instead, I curled up in a ball in a slum in Brazil, and licked my wounds in Ireland. She had been fighting through every day. She had been the strong one.

They were walking slowly down the sidewalk approaching her building. He held her close to him rubbing her arms, and I cursed the cold weather. I held my breath to see if Bella would again say good-bye to him in the lobby or if this time she would invite him up. I had been encouraged by the hug and the peck on the cheek she had given him after every date. I had taken great joy in the desolated thoughts that ran through his mind every time he watched her get on that elevator alone.

Tonight, his thoughts ran wild for her. I gritted my teeth and watched helplessly from across the street. She was turning after saying good-bye, but then he pulled her back and put his hands on each side of her face. They stood motionless for a moment staring at each other, and then he moved in and she didn't stop him.

I set my jaw and watched as his lips touched hers. The kiss was at first very calm, but it changed into something much more. I felt an involuntary growl building in my chest. My thoughts turned shockingly murderous for Thomas and I felt the burning venom rise like hot lava in my throat as my muscles tensed in my back and the monster in me wanted to spring and attack. I painfully swallowed at the venom pooling in my mouth as his hands moved across her body pulling her ever closer. At first, I fought against the image, turning my head away. I couldn't bear to see it. But ultimately, I did the only thing that kept me sane. I closed my eyes and went into his mind and felt all I could of his closeness to Bella.

I felt her soft lips and the warmth of her skin as her blood pulsated through her veins. I felt her body against his and groaned inwardly as he pulled her still closer to his body. I could feel the curve in the small of her back that I loved so much. His hands moved up her sides and my fingers flexed as I felt her ribs and then her arms and shoulders. I whispered her name as he ran his hands along her neck and face. And then, my jaw clenched as I felt Bella put her warm hands on his cheek. My head was bent down into my hands and I felt a cry escape from me as her lips parted for a moment as she kissed him. I could feel her, smell her, taste her. I was lost in the kiss. And as much as I hated it, I felt so empty again when she pulled away from him and ended it. I was left breathless sitting in the cold winter night all alone, longing with every part of me to feel her again.

I opened my eyes and stared into the lobby. She was looking at him and I was in agony to know her thoughts. Was she realizing she loved him? Would she pull him close and start kissing him again? Was she about to take his hand and lead him into the elevator? I felt myself crumbling at each thought. What would she ever want with me if she could have someone human? Someone warm, with a heartbeat and a pulse. Someone who didn't crave her blood. Someone who didn't have urges that in a careless moment could take her life. Someone who could give her children and grow old _with_ her.

I was relieved beyond reason when she said goodnight and went in the elevator alone. I stared at Thomas enviously as he hailed a cab and drove off.

My fingers were clenched in tight fists. My senses were stretched tight and I was still full of adrenaline from being in Thomas' mind when he kissed her. I replayed the whole scene again in my own mind. She was going to fall in love with him. I put my head in my hands as I felt her kiss one more time. I relished it and yearned to taste her again on my lips.

But, then my thoughts drifted back to _our_ kisses.

There was something different about this scene, about the kiss with Thomas that I was struggling to make sense of. And then I realized what it was. The way Bella had reacted when kissing Thomas was completely different from how she had behaved when she kissed me.

She had _never_ pulled away from me. I was always the one that had to reluctantly end our embraces. I remembered how her hands had tangled themselves into my hair and her arms went tight around my neck. How I could hear her heart stop and start again, and feel her hot breath all around me every time I kissed her. She had fainted in my arms. None of those things had happened when she kissed Thomas. Was it just youth or reckless abandon that had made her react that way so long ago?

I wasn't so sure.

Could it be that there was a clue in all of this? Did she still love me? Was she hiding her feeings from me out of fear and pain? Was it only me that could bring out the rapture and feelings of true love just as she did for me? I felt my adrenaline kicking in again. But for a much different reason. I was not going down without a fight.

I was done. I was done watching from afar and torturing myself with the unknown. I was done feeling sorry for myself. I was done living in the past. I wanted a future, and I wanted it with Bella. I had to tell her how much I loved her and wanted her with me and would never, could never, leave her again. If we were meant to be together, and would only be our happiest when we were reunited forever, I was foolish not to take the chance.

I stared up at the top of the building where I saw a light flicker on. Bella was inside, thankfully alone, but not for long. I sat on the bench and gazed up at my sanctuary.

She was the closest to Heaven that I would ever be. If there was a chance of having Bella forever, I would find a way.

I was going to fight for her. I wasn't going to fight fair.

And I would start tonight.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

**ANGEL **

Long awaited darkness falls,

Casting shadows on the walls.

In the twilight, how I am alone.

Sitting near the fireplace.

Dying embers warm my face.

In this peaceful solitude

All the outside world subdued.

Everything comes back to me again.

In the gloom,

Like an angel passing through my room.

- - -

Half awake, and half in dream,

Seeing long forgotten scenes.

So the present ones seems to the past,

Now and then become entwined,

Playing games within my mind.

Like the embers as they die,

Love was one prolonged good-bye.

And it all comes back to me tonight,

In the gloom.

Like an angel passing through my room.

- - -

I close my eyes,

And my twilight images go by,

All too soon,

Like an angel passing through my room.

- - -

In this peaceful solitude

All the outside world subdued,

Everything comes back to me again,

In the gloom,

Like an angel passing through my room.

- - -

I close my eyes,

And my twilight images go by.

All too soon,

Like an angel passing through my room.

Angel Passing Through - Sissel

- - -

**(Bella's POV)**

My lips still felt a little bruised from kissing Vaughn. I got off the elevator and unlocked my door. I could hear the silence pushing in on me. The clock was the only sound. Tick, tick, tick. I closed the door and stood there in my entryway struggling in my mind with what my next step should be. I felt my coat lay on a chair. My purse was placed on the table, but yet, all I could think about was the kiss Vaughn had just given me. I was cold. I felt a shiver run through me and I wrapped my arms around myself.

_Make a fire_. I heard my conscious mind call out. I turned on a light to see in the darkness, and I went over to the fireplace and turned it on.

I hadn't kissed anyone since . . .

My fingers absentmindedly ran across my lips.

I had tried very hard to kiss him back. I had mechanically placed my hands on his face and tried to give with my lips the answer he was so fervently waiting for. I had talked myself into believing that this, being with Vaughn, was what I had wanted. One kiss told me I was terribly wrong to think I could attempt it.

Nothing would ever be able to compare to those cold, hard lips that ever so gently lingered on my own. Now I knew.

Kissing Vaughn had almost seemed like a betrayal to myself. My heart was screaming for the one that made it fly. I kept waiting for the rush, the heat, the commanding need to be closer and feel Vaughn's lips on mine and run my fingers through his hair. There had been none of those things. Not one.

I remembered falling in love, it was the easiest and most intoxicating experience I had ever had. I'd never had to force one feeling, or one pounding heartbeat. The only problem I'd had was trying to rein my feelings _in_.

I hadn't, and couldn't, fall in love with Vaughn. If I couldn't feel these things for Thomas Vaughn, things weren't looking very good for me.

I made my way into my bedroom. My mind was completely pre-occupied as I dressed in my pajamas and then came and sat on the floor in front of the fireplace. I wrapped my arms around my knees and watched the embers dance and weave. I was slowly mesmerized by the flames. Shadows loomed behind me and I could feel the warmth reaching me, but inside I still felt so cold. Tonight, when I was kissing Vaughn, I felt like Edward was right there beside me. I closed my eyes and broke my most hard and fast rule. I began to think of him. I pictured his grace, and loveliness, and felt my soul relax for the first time in so long.

I laid down on the floor, staring at the flames and lost myself in the memories that I was always trying to fight.

I closed my eyes and felt the tears roll down my cheek as I picked out my favorite memory. The one that I pushed farther away than any other. The place where he first really touched me. The place where for the first time he laid his head on my chest to hear my heartbeat - the meadow. Oh, the meadow.

I still felt the slight breeze blow my hair and ruffle the wildflowers as I ran my fingers up and down his arm covered with a million diamonds. I could feel myself curled up in his arms and staying there until the sun began to fade. That night was the first I spent in the arms of my archangel.

The meadow was so far away from me, not only in distance, but in circumstance, that it seemed like a fairy tale from my imagination. Most of the time, the memory seemed airy and out of focus. Only tonight did it seem so real that if I reached out my hand I would feel cold marble on my fingers.

I let the memory of a hundred nights with him wash over me and wondered if I would have given myself to him so freely if I knew that he never loved me, and that he would leave. The answer was a resounding yes. I wasn't sure that I had ever really had a choice. From the first moment I saw him, I yearned for him in every possible way.

As I lay there watching the lights dance around me, it was as if there were ghosts swimming around me, each carrying a memory, floating in, floating out. I would let this night be filled with Edward, but I knew that all too soon the light would come pouring in through the window marking another day. I would find reality taking the place of all that played before me this night. Tomorrow would be painful, but right now, I didn't care.

How many days would I have? Life seemed so long without him. My mind replayed all the reckless things I had done trying to keep his voice in my head. Unkindly, time had also taken that from me. Gradually, no matter what I did, the velvet voice came to me less and less, and then became silent.

I knew that as time went on, my memory of his face would dim, it would gradually become more difficult to recall the precise texture and color of his hair. I would have to struggle to pull back the feel of his lips on my jaw. But, my heart would never forget. It would rebel and fight against anybody but the one that caused it to stutter, stop and start again. My heart would never love another.

I was struggling to find all the reasons I had given myself as to why I needed to get up everyday. This torture of loss was so strong. I wasn't sure how it was possible to feel all these years of pain and still be here. But tonight, just tonight, I would forget all the outside world and let it just be the two of us.

I felt my eyelids close and open again. I would soon fall asleep here, amidst all the scenes filled with him. My eyes were blurry from tears, but as my eyes drifted shut again, I could see Edward coming to lay beside me, his beautiful face was silhouetted by the fire, and I smiled. My dreams were beginning. I prayed for a long night filled with memories of my only love, my angel.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

The next morning when I awoke, my cheek was burning. At first I thought it was from the heat of the fire, then I realized it was burning with an icy feel that had only happened when Edward touched me.

My head was completely filled with images that had passed over me during the night. My dreams had almost been unearthly in their beauty and had seemed so real. I could hear Edward's velvet voice speaking to me warmly in that formal, perfect articulation that could only be acquired in an earlier century. All night long he had told me in a hundred different ways how much he loved me. He had whispered how he wanted me forever and was so sorry for how much his leaving had hurt me.

In my dreams, I had whispered his name.

I rolled over onto my back, and realized I had a pillow, and there was a blanket on me. This blanket was off my bed, and I didn't remember getting it the night before.

I snuggled down into its softness, and as I took a deep breath, I could smell the delicious scent that was unmistakably Edward's. I closed my eyes and snuggled the blanket up to my face for a long moment. Then, as I came farther out of sleep, I realized that couldn't possibly be right. There was no way it could be Edward's scent. I inhaled again. Oh, but it was. It could never be duplicated.

I sat up on one elbow and felt the tears dried on my face. The sunlight was just pouring in my window and a streak of light ran across my legs and to the fireplace. I reached out onto the carpet to get up and was surprised to feel that the carpet next to me was ice cold. I slowly ran my fingers over it and marveled at how that could be. I curled my fingers into the loops and looked around me quickly. My heart stopped for a moment, and then began again.

I got up and walked around my apartment. Everything was in place. I ran to the front door and it was locked. I threw it open and saw no one, nothing. I closed my door and slowly walked back to the place on the floor where I'd slept last night. Nothing happened, it was just my imagination, my dreams and reality intertwining and playing tricks on my mind again. But why did everything about this space feel different? Unearthly and hushed.

My head turned from side to side again. There was no sound. Nothing.

It was like an angel passing through my room.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

**Did you think it was weird? Please tell me what you think . . . . **

**Tomorrow's chapter is titled "Competition"!!! That sounds more like it, right? I think it is a really good chapter . . . don't give up on me yet! See ya tomorrow, I hope!**


	11. COMPETITION

**Hey! Thank you so much for all the generous things you said. It really touched me that the last chapter didn't throw you guys off, but that you saw what I was trying to say. Mushy stuff over.**

**There are a few songs in here, and I hope they don't distract. I took them out and then put them back in. I think they do a lot to help you feel like you are there. Speaking of being there . . . if you want, type and then click on rainbow room. There is a picture there of what I try to describe. There is also a girl wearing a dress with a slit just like in this chapter!**

**I tried to make the article look right. I couldn't. You'll know what I mean.**

**See ya at the end!**

** - - - - - - - - **

"Bella . . . . Earth to Bella. Can you hear me?"

I snapped to attention. Simmons was staring at me. Apparently, my mind had roamed off again. Thinking that a vampire may have been lying next to me all night after a seven year lapse had a tendency to make my mind wander.

"Could you hand me the Merrill Lynch file?" He was smiling. Evidently, he had been asking me for it and I hadn't heard him.

I handed it to him and plunged back into my work again.

It was about 3:00 on Friday afternoon, the Friday before Thanksgiving, and Simmons and I were in my office putting together a proposal for the Board. Now that Christmas was approaching, our public relations department wanted us to put forth a more caring image. The premise was that if we changed our image somewhat to a tender and compassionate investment firm, that those companies that hated our guts would once again want to do business with us.

Some in the company felt we needed to reach out more into the community and do some non-profit work or donate money to under -privileged kids or something ridiculous like that.

I still didn't understand why I was put in charge of it. I was about the farthest thing from loving and caring this firm had ever seen.

We were just putting the finishing touches on an ad campaign that made us look like Mother Theresa, only much better dressed, when Simmons threw his pen down on the table and said, "I have been at the office since 7:00 this morning. I have got to get out of here."

I laughed and said, "We have about one more hour worth of work on this ludicrous waste of time and then we will have to get out of here anyway. We will be late for the Governor's Ball if we don't."

He smiled. "Ah yes, another ball." He laughed wryly. "I had no idea that working here would entail going to so many parties. I don't recall seeing that in my job description."

I nodded my head knowingly. I was pretty sure I hated the parties more than he did. I looked up at him. "Well, you seem to enjoy the girls that you take to the parties," I teased.

He leaned back in his chair with his hands behind his head. His smile was broad as he said, "That is one part I don't mind." His eyebrows raised a little and he let out a small sigh as he said, "I will enjoy spending the evening with Sasha."

"Sasha? What about the Gazelle supermodel?"

"Oh, Sasha is a model too, and she's pretty super." He laughed deeply.

I tilted my head and looked at him for a moment. "How old are you?" I asked.

He blinked his eyes in surprise. "We've been working together in one form or another for two years and that's the first personal question you've ever asked me. You really don't know how old I am?"

"Well, I always figured you were close to my age," I said defensively. "It's not like I did a background check on you."

He chuckled and said, "I'm 24. My birthday is in January. I am just a few months younger than you."

I tried to look at him with new eyes. He wasn't bad looking. Although, I still judged every man I saw against a much higher standard of perfection, so what did I know?

"This job must really cut into your social life," I said with mock sincerity.

He chuckled again and said, "It certainly doesn't help." He stretched his arms over his head and said, "But I am human. I make time for things that are important to me."

"Ouch," I said sarcastically.

He laughed and continued. "The worst part is that at most functions everyone assumes you and I are together. We are together so much of the time, it is hard to convince the ladies that there really isn't anything going on. They are always jealous of you."

I grimaced. "Jealous of me? The girls you date are Goddesses. How could they possibly be jealous?"

He straightened up in his seat and his look was warm. "You really don't see yourself very well, do you?"

At that moment, Sally came in with a stack of papers for me to sign. On top was a magazine. Without looking at it, I took it in my hands and said, "Sally, I think you forgot this."

She looked at the magazine and then said, "Oh no, Ms. Swan. That is for you. I thought you might like to see it." She walked swiftly out of the room with a happy smile on her face. She obviously thought the magazine was something I would be excited about. I laid the magazine down in front of me, and I slowly felt the panic rise as I began babbling incoherently.

It was STAR magazine, and on the cover was Vaughn . . . and he wasn't alone. I was walking with him and he had his arm around me. I could tell the picture was taken as we were walking into a restaurant last week. The headline across the top read "It's love for the Sexiest Bachelor Alive." A smaller caption below said, "Sorry ladies, we all wanted him, but it looks like he has found true love with investment tycoon Isabella Swan."

Simmons could only see the reaction on my face. He showed great concern as he took the magazine and turned it around to read it. His eyes grew very wide and then he exclaimed, "Wow!"

I heard a garbled squeak and realized it was me.

"This is a really good shot of the two of you," he assessed. He opened the magazine and found the article and began reading:

Thomas Vaughn, (27) the hot quarterback of the New York Giants, is apparently off the market. Friends say, this time it's for good.

He has been seen around town with the lovely up and coming star of the money world, Isabella Swan (25). The couple

have enjoyed many romantic moments around the city, from

Broadway shows, to the Ballet, and eating at the famed restaurant Tavern on the Green.

"This is the real thing." A close friend told STAR magazine.

"I wouldn't be surprised if there are wedding bells soon." Another

close friend has secretly told us that they are waiting until after the

football season for the big announcement.

Some have speculated that Swan may not be ready for

marriage, and that is the reason for the delay. She is still seeing

her old flame Michael Simmons (24) on a regular basis and to

add intrigue to the love triangle, she and Simmons are co-workers.

Vaughn has reportedly demanded that Swan stop seeing

Simmons, and that has caused some tension in the relationship.

She was also recently seen at the exclusive club Northsix

dancing hot and heavy with an unidentified male. She left the club

with him and didn't return home until almost 4:00 in the morning.

Vaughn was said to be furious, but wants very much to work things

out with Swan.

Swan has been frequenting boutiques that specialize in bridal

gowns no doubt looking for just the right dress for their big day. "I

am so happy for them," a family member has stated. "Thomas

wants a big family, and they intend to start having children very soon after the marriage. . . ."

I began beating my head on the desk. Simmons looked up from the magazine and said, "There's still a page and a half left. Do you want me to keep reading?"

My voice was garbled as my face was buried in my hands, and laying on my desk. "Read one more word, and I'll kill you where you stand."

"Do you want to see the rest of the pictures? There's one of you walking into some clothes store, and another with you and that huge Emmett guy walking out of Northsix, and another of you and Thomas coming out of the ballet, and, hey . . . there's one of you and me at the Waldorf party!" His shoulders slumped as he said, "Oh man, I wonder if Sasha has seen this yet. I will have to do some fast talking to get out of this one."

He smiled then and said, "On the other hand, this might get me some play. I am in a love triangle with the Sexiest Bachelor Alive. My social standing has just risen considerably."

"Shut up or die," I said with my face still down on my desk.

"Why are you so bothered by this?" He asked me.

I lifted my head to look at him incredulously. "Well, first of all, not one word of that article is true, and second of all, I want to be respected and revered in the business world. I want to be feared and admired. Now, all I am is a hussy stuck in a love triangle with a co-worker and out all night with another guy, and the sweet innocent Thomas Vaughn is trying to tame me and then apparently stick me in a house so I can bear him 6 children!"

He winced a little at my tirade and then said, "You are reading too much into this, Bella. It will all blow over soon."

I stood up and pointed at him and said, "This is all your fault! This never would have happened if you hadn't tried to make me act human!" I started wandering aimlessly around my office. I began babbling again.

"Being human has never worked out very well for me. I am just no good at it. It's a train wreck every time I try!" I was throwing my hands up in the air as I paced around.

Suddenly Sally beeped in. "Ms. Swan, Mr. Vaughn is on line one." She said it with a smile in her voice and it just made me angrier.

Simmons stood up. "I will leave you two to discuss if you're having six or seven children." I threw a stapler at him as he ducked out of the room.

I picked up the phone and growled out a hello.

"Damn, I was hoping to get to you before you saw it." He sounded very frustrated.

"How did they get all this?" I bellowed.

"Bella, I swear I don't know. I actually don't think they talked to anybody. I am pretty sure they made it all up. I am so sorry. I never saw anybody taking our picture."

I just sat there pinching the bridge of my nose with my fingers. I could feel a serious headache coming on.

Very hesitantly he said, "Do you still want me to go to the Governor's Ball tonight?"

I let out an exasperated gush of air. "I don't know Vaughn . . . "

He was silent for a moment, and then he said quietly, "I don't want to make things harder for you. I'll just talk to you tomorrow."

Oh great, now I felt guilty. I was letting these vultures win. I didn't really care about being with Vaughn tonight, but I didn't want to slink around in the shadows either.

"How about this," I said. "Can you just meet me there? It will be so much better than pictures plastered all over the tabloids tomorrow, showing us getting out of the same car. I don't suspect the paparazzi will actually be allowed in the party."

I could hear the relief in his voice. "That's a great idea. I will be there around 8:00. I can't wait to see you."

I knew I should say I can't wait to see you either, but I was still the world's worst liar. I settled for something neutral.

"Yeah, I'll see you then." Probably not exactly what he was hoping for.

It had been two days since Vaughn had kissed me. I wanted to tell him that it was over and that I needed to end this, but he made me promise him five dates. Tonight was number four. I really hated to hurt him. He had turned out to be a very nice guy. Any girl would be lucky to get him. The problem with Vaughn's kiss had been weighing on me, but nothing like what had happened the next morning. Or didn't happen. That was the problem, I just couldn't make sense of it.

I couldn't stop thinking about how much my blanket had smelled like him and how cold the carpet was. I rubbed my temples. I knew I had to forget about all of it. I was actually more than slightly worried that I was going crazy. Hallucinations were a clear sign of a sick mind. It had been so long since I had heard his voice in my head. I thought that meant I was improving.

I rubbed my hands over my face and looked at my watch. I would be late if I didn't leave soon. I cleared my stack of papers and signed all the ones Sally had given me. I then gathered my things, threw the stupid magazine in the trash, and went home to get ready for another party I didn't want to attend, wear a dress I didn't want to wear, and be with a man I didn't love. This human thing was highly over rated.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I arrived at Rockefeller Center and was met by a mob of photographers. I was so terrified that I almost told my driver to keep going. I jumped out of the car and began running the best that I could through the huge, crushing mob. They were screaming my name as they pushed cameras in my face and kept asking where Vaughn was. The flash blinded my eyes and all I could see were bright white dots in front of me when I groped forward and felt the door handle and escaped into the building.

I didn't stop running until I was safe in the elevator. My breathing slowly returned back to normal as the elevator went to the top floor where the Rainbow Room was located. I warily put one foot out to see if the cameras would start flashing, but nothing happened. I was safe. I walked out acting as if nothing had happened when I was met by Simmons.

He seemed very excited about the whole thing. "Man, that was crazy out there, wasn't it? The second I stepped out of the car they all started screaming your name and asking where you were. I would have got past them pretty fast if Sasha hadn't stopped to pose for pictures."

I looked to his right and saw a very exotic looking girl staring down at me from what looked like six feet of nothing but legs. The slit in the side of her dress went all the way up to the top of her thigh. I gave Simmons an appraising look. I mentally noted that this girl would probably last two weeks before he moved on.

I shrugged out of my coat and began walking to the coat check. Simmons and "legs" followed me. "There isn't anyone in there taking pictures, is there?" I gestured to the dining room.

He was shaking his head before I finished. "No," he said. "The coast is clear."

I took a deep breath and walked in. A few heads turned, but for the most part, no one took notice. I breathed a huge sigh of relief. Simmons led the way to our table and I laid down my purse and went to speak to a few people I knew. Dinner wasn't going to start for another twenty minutes or so.

The Rainbow Room, located on the top floor of the Rockefeller Center, was built in the 1930's and many considered it to be one of the premiere places in Manhattan. It was one of my favorite places. Probably because it was nice, but non-pretentious. It has a revolving dance floor, but my favorite feature were the windows that surrounded the entire restaurant. I stood at the windows and looked at the view. I could see the ice skaters far below and could just make out the gold statue and waterfall. The Rockefeller Center Christmas Tree had already been delivered and crews were hard at work putting on thousands of lights for when the tree would be lit next Thursday, on Thanksgiving night. A light snow was falling and it made everything very soft and peaceful. I laid my hand on the ice cold glass and felt myself imagine it was Edward's hand. I instinctively pulled away from the window and walked to my table. I was grateful that Edward wouldn't be at the Ball. At least not in person, the place he held in my heart didn't count.

Shortly before dinner began, I saw Vaughn walk in. He looked flushed and out of breath. He straightened his tie as he scanned the crowd. I looked at him sadly. Most likely, he was the Sexiest Man Alive. "Alive" being the key word in that sentence. It would be just too perfect that I fall in love with him and have those kids. One or two, not six or seven. I always had to do things the hard way. Once again, I tried to will myself to fall in love with him, much the same way Jake had tried to imprint on me before I left for college. No such luck.

The smile on his face was unmistakable when he found me and began striding to the table. He kissed the top of my head and said, "I'm sorry, that was terrible out there. I don't know how to fix this."

I smiled meekly. "Let's not ruin a perfectly good evening by talking about this. They can stand out in the 34 degree weather and wait for us to come back out in three or four hours. That ought to bring some justice to the world."

He laughed and gave me his easy smile. "You're right," he said. "Let's enjoy the evening." He looked me up and down. "And how could I not, with the most beautiful girl in the room on my arm."

After dinner, the Governor stood up to give his speech. It was long-winded and excruciatingly boring. One would think that the sun didn't rise on New York City without the help of the Governor. Thankfully, he finished. Unthankfully, that meant that the dancing was beginning. The emcee announced that the entertainment for the night was some singer named Micheal Buble'. I had never heard of him, but everyone else around the table seemed very excited. He sang mostly songs from the 40's and 50's, and apparently the majority of his songs were very romantic. A night full of love songs. I took a deep breath and plastered a smile on my face.

Vaughn stood up and put his hand out to me. The look on his face made me want to tell him the truth of how I felt right away, but I knew this was not the place. I stood up slowly and we walked hand in hand to the dance floor. He held me very close. I could feel his heart pounding through his tuxedo, and I thought, was this how it was for Edward? Were my emotions this transparent for him to read? I winced inwardly as I realized my emotions had been 1,000 times easier for Edward to decipher. I had made it so easy for him. I had never been interesting. He never had to fight for my affection. I was just a boring, clumsy human.

Vaughn was holding me close to his cheek when it became very obvious that he wanted to ask me something. I pulled back and looked at him. He was having a war with himself. The kind of war in which you very much want to know the answer to something, but aren't sure if you want to hear the answer, or how the person will react when given the question. Maybe he would make it easy for me. Maybe he would ask me right now how I felt about him and I would be able to give, hopefully, a kind but honest answer. Finally, he took a breath and asked me.

"Bella . . ." He swallowed and then said, "Did you really stay out all night with a guy you met at Northsix?"

No matter how I felt about him personally, I didn't want him to think I would do such a thing. I shook my head and said reassuringly, "Vaughn, it wasn't like that. He was an old friend that came into town unexpectedly. He asked me to go with him. We did stay out all night, but we did things like visit the Empire State Building and hang out at Times Square. It was all very innocent."

I could feel the weight lift off of Vaughn's shoulders. "Thank you for telling me," he said warmly. "I know that until we have five dates I shouldn't ask you anything like that but . . ."

I interrupted him. "It's okay, I am glad you asked me. I would rather you know the truth than think I was that kind of girl, especially when I haven't even invited you up to my apartment."

He pulled me close to him again and I was glad he didn't pursue the whole hot and heavy dancing thing that was also reported in the magazine. Leave it up to those dumb vultures that that was the only thing they told the truth about. That would have been a little hard to explain. I also felt bad at my hypocrisy about sounding so virtuous. I knew that if a certain vampire still loved me and wanted to come up to my apartment, I wouldn't be able to get the door opened fast enough.

The saxophone was playing softly and the man's voice was so smooth. It created a very romantic mood with the beautiful chandelier, the lights turned down low casting a soft pink hue, and the soft snow that was falling outside. I looked around me and saw many couples, including Simmons and Sasha, having a great time. I envied them.

I was brought out of my thoughts when Mr. Buble' began singing that song. It was the same song that I had heard on the yacht that had ended the night for me. The same one that Edward had played on the piano while he sang those beautiful words. _Can't I just have one night free from Edward_? I shouted to myself.

Suddenly, there was a hand on Vaughn's shoulder, and a velvet voice behind him.

"Pardon me, but may I have this dance with the lady?"

My fingers dug into Vaughn's palm as my tell-tale heart stopped, then started again, and then began pounding furiously. Vaughn turned to him, and then back at me wondering what he should do. Edward didn't give him a chance to decide. Without me ever seeing it, Edward was standing in front of me, holding me close. Vaughn looked at him with a barely calm facade and out of the corner of my eye, I saw him look at me. I know he wanted me to refuse this dance. I knew I should look at Vaughn and reassure him, but I couldn't tear my eyes away from the angel face that I hopelessly loved.

Edward moved us away from Vaughn and turned his back on him. He moved so gracefully on the dance floor that I didn't have to think about the steps.

He put his mouth so close to the side of my face that his cold breath tickled my ear, "Your dancing has improved," he whispered.

I kept waiting for his face to come back into my view, but his mouth stayed right next to my ear. I closed my eyes and tried not to move enough to make him stop holding me so tightly.

"Do you remember this song?" His mouth was moving on my ear again.

"No." I lied.

I felt him freeze for a moment and I was so afraid he would pull away, but he recovered quickly.

"Yes you do, Bella," he pressed.

"No, actually I truly don't." My voice was thin and high.

He chuckled. "You are still a very bad liar, but I will try to revive your memory."

Unbelievably, he held me tighter and I felt passion taking over all my other senses. He grabbed a handful of my dress at the small of my back and his other hand laced his fingers through mine and held it tight to his chest. His lips ran along my ear just long enough to send a shiver coursing through my entire body. My heart was awake, wondering where this feeling had been for so long. I could feel him, smell him, taste him . . . I wanted him.

His voice far out shadowed the man at the microphone as he began singing to me.

_I know your image of me is what I hope to be, _

_I've treated you unkindly, but girl can't you see?_

_There's no one more important to me, _

_So darling can't you please just see through me?_

_Cause we're alone now and I'm singing this song for you._

The band played on even though the words were over, and I was so grateful for the moment, whatever he would give me. I didn't care what this did to me later. I would deal with it then. He was my only brand of heroin. My arm, that I had been concentrating so deeply on just laying on his shoulder, tightened around his neck and I wanted to place my lips on his so desperately that I had to bite my lip and bow my head to keep from trying. I could tell the song was ending and I never wanted anything so much as I did for that song to keep playing for the rest of the night, for the rest of forever.

It seemed that he could sense the song ending too, and his face traveled over my cheek and then moved back farther until his mouth was behind my ear. I felt him inhale deeply and brush his lips along my neck so quickly that I could not be sure that it had really happened. He brought his face around to me again and his cheeks seemed flushed somehow. His chest was moving up and down rapidly, and I saw him swallow hard as his nose brushed against mine, and then the song ended.

He brought his eyes to mine and they were smoldering. Dark and almost ferocious in their stare. I felt my breath catch as I held onto his gaze. He brought my wrist up to his face and inhaled so deeply that his eyes glazed over with an inhuman yearning and I tightened my grip on his fingers.

"You look beyond beautiful," he hoarsely whispered.

He brought his face closer to mine and said, "Can I dance with you again tonight?" I wanted to answer yes in a way that didn't involve words when suddenly I heard Vaughn's voice.

"The song is over, Cullen." He was fighting to keep his voice calm as he stepped closer to me.

Edward let go of the handful of dress he held behind my back, but he ran his fingers along my side as he brought his hands down to rest in his pockets. His eyes still had never left mine. I was trying to remember Vaughn's name when all of the sudden, I heard a voice bellow behind me.

"Bella, I was hoping that I would get another chance to dance with you before I was sent home."

I reluctantly turned my head and saw Emmett looking very dashing in his tuxedo. I smiled and Vaughn looked at him with wide eyes.

I knew I should introduce this new brother, but I looked at Vaughn and still couldn't recall his name. I opened my mouth and drew a blank.

"It's Thomas Vaughn," I heard Edward whisper in my ear.

"Right. . . um, that is . . . uh, Vaughn, this is the friend I was with at Northsix. He is Edward's other brother. This is Emmett Hale."

At that moment, a woman carrying a tray of desserts and drinks was bumped by someone on the dance floor and the dishes and glasses all began to topple off the tray in different directions. Emmett took one quick step to the side and caught all four drinks and the two dessert plates without spilling a drop. It all happened so fast that I had to replay it in my mind to catch up. Vaughn was beyond amazed. Edward just stared at his younger, but bigger brother and slowly shook his head with a condemning look.

"Wow!" Vaughn said breathlessly. "Listen, do you play ball? We could really use you. My offensive line is weak and I got hammered out there on our last game. Your reflexes are so quick, I doubt anything could get past you. I could get you a try-out with the coach."

Emmett's eyes brightened until he saw Edward standing behind Vaughn emphatically shaking his head. Emmett looked at Vaughn remorsefully. I actually felt bad for him. I couldn't imagine how much fun he would have on a football field.

"Sorry man, it sounds awesome, but I have an old injury." He moved his arm around and winced like he was in pain. "I am a big fan of yours though. Jasper and I love to watch you play." Emmett gestured behind him and Jasper waved from the background. "Nice to see you again, Thomas," Jasper said politely.

There was an awkward silence as Vaughn turned his attention back to Edward. Vaughn grabbed my hand as he said, "If you don't mind, I am going to dance with _my _date now." His message came across loud and clear. Emmett, however, didn't seem to care.

He stepped up beside me and said, "Actually, Thomas, I am leaving tomorrow, and I was hoping that I could dance with Bella for a little while."

Vaughn looked down with a frustrated sigh, and then turned up to my face to see what I wanted to do. "Your decision," he said softly.

I was still more than slightly dazed from my previous dance. My heartbeat had not yet returned to normal. There was another vampire I wanted to dance with so much more. I kept thinking, would he actually ask me to dance again before the evening was through? I managed a small smile at Emmett and then turned to Vaughn and said, "Do you mind if we dance for a few minutes?"

Vaughn opened his mouth to speak, but Emmett grabbed me around the waist, lifting me off the floor at least a foot, and began twirling me around. He quickly led me away from the group, and into the middle of the dance floor.

A new song was just starting and Emmett's eyes lit up. "Hey Bella, do you know the rumba?"

"The what?" I asked.

He chuckled as he pulled me close and squared our hips exactly in front of each other. Then, he began a series of steps forward and backward precisely in time with the beat of the latin song. He put my arms around his neck and then put his hands back on my hips, leading me flawlessly through the moves. I smiled in spite of myself. This was actually kind of fun.

The bongo drums and trumpets filled the room as we glided around the room. The words floated out and Emmett sang along:

_When the rumba rhythm starts to play,_

_Dance with me,_

_Make me sway._

_ - - - _

_Like a lazy ocean hugs the shore, _

_Hold me close_

_Sway me more._

_ - - -_

_Like a flower bending in the breeze,_

_Bend with me, _

_Sway with me._

_ - - -_

_When you dance you have a way with me,_

_Stay with me,_

_Sway with me._

Did all vampires sing and dance flawlessly? I realized that somewhere Vaughn was watching the whole thing, but I was concentrating so hard on following Emmett that I didn't dare look away. I wondered if Edward was watching, but just thinking of him almost caused me to lose my footing, so I forced my mind to other things.

"I am going to miss you, Emmett."

"Ah, Bella, I'm going to miss you too." He looked like a little boy who just lost his puppy.

"Actually," he began. "I am not going home quite yet. The three of us are leaving to go hunting as soon as we leave here tonight." He shook his head. "Edward and Jasper haven't been hunting since they got here. Edward is doing all right, but it isn't the smartest thing for Jasper to go that long."

I blinked my eyes in astonishment. "They have been here almost a month. Why have they waited so long?" I asked.

Emmett stared at me strangely like I should already know the answer. "He didn't want to leave you, Bella."

For a small moment, my heart quickened and then I realized what he was getting at. "He was probably afraid I was going to try some underhanded trick over the weekend while he was gone, right?"

Emmett gave me a look that meant I had it all wrong. I saw him glance anxiously across the room and I followed his gaze. I couldn't see anything out of the ordinary. He cleared his throat and said, "Like I was saying, I am going to miss you too, Bella. I hate to think I won't be here to see you do something human."

I lifted my chin defensively. "Hey, I'll have you know that I haven't had stitches or a broken bone in years."

"Just a broken heart," he said softly.

I completely lost track of the steps and came to a complete stop as I pulled back and stared at him.

"Don't Emmett," I said quietly, but firmly.

He pulled me back and began dancing slowly as he said, "You have to talk to him, Bella. I saw you two dancing just now, that was some serious heat. You are totally in love with him."

I narrowed my eyes and said, "Tell your family that I love them and miss them. Tell Alice I love her." Then I turned around and began walking away from him. He caught me and pulled me back once more and said, "I'm sorry, I will be good." He swung me around and lowered me effortlessly into a dip as the song ended.

We danced two more songs, and then I saw Vaughn get up and begin walking towards us before the song ever ended. But, before Vaughn was halfway across the dance floor, Jasper came up behind us and took my hand and said, "Would you like to dance?"

This time I didn't even attempt to look in Vaughn's direction. I just nodded and smiled as I turned to face Jasper and waved good-bye to Emmett. I was curious as to what was really going on, but I kept quiet as Jasper shyly put his arm behind my back, and began dancing in a small circle. There was a good 12 inches between us.

"You aren't going to sing to me too, are you?" I said playfully.

For a moment, he looked confused and then he smiled broadly. "Well, I could try, but I doubt you would want to hear it."

I smiled back. "I was starting to think that all of you could dance and sing. I was going to suggest you take your act on the road. Women would have the show sold out pretty darn quick."

He looked away embarrassed and I waited for a few minutes as we danced in complete silence before I asked him a question.

"So, what could Edward possibly have said to you that would convince you to come dance with me?" I raised my eyebrow speculatively.

He looked very innocent as he said, "What are you talking about?"

I pressed on with my line of questioning. "Did he promise you that he would let you leave and return to Alice?"

His mouth twisted slightly and he said, "In case you haven't noticed, it is taking two of us just to keep up with you." He gestured to the corner where Emmett stood. "This week it took three of us and you still managed to have the upper hand." He looked at me seriously and said, "I am not leaving any time soon."

I narrowed my eyes and looked at him suspiciously, "He promised you something. You wouldn't have come over to ask me to dance on your own. I remember how you always acted around me, I remember on my birthday . . ."

I sucked in air, hoping that it would take back the words I had just said. I closed my eyes against the absolute stupidity. "Oh, Jasper, I am so sorry. I never should have said that."

His eyes tightened as he shook his head. "No, it's all right. I am the one who should have apologized long ago. I can't help thinking that this whole mess is my fault. If I had been," he seemed to be searching for the right word, "If I had been stronger, none of this would have happened."

The song was ending and I was confused. "What do you mean, Jasper?" I felt that this was the key to something important that had always been nagging at me in the back of my head.

He looked at me with nervous eyes, and then shrugged his shoulders indifferently. "I don't know, Bella. I guess I am just feeling very guilty for that night. I am sorry."

I saw Jasper glance quickly out of the corner of his eye in Emmett's direction, and I turned to see what he was looking at. Emmett had caught up to Vaughn, as he once again attempted to cross the dance floor to me now that the song had ended. I saw Emmett say something that he personally found very funny and then slap Vaughn on the back. Vaughn stumbled forward and had to take three steps to balance himself. It looked as if he had the wind knocked out of him, but Emmett, seemingly oblivious, began talking a hundred miles an hour about something as he pulled Vaughn out into the lobby.

I turned back around to cross-examine Jasper some more, but he wasn't there. Edward was.

"That was a perfectly executed play," I said softly. I meant for it to come out stronger, but it was the best I could manage.

"What do you mean?" He could play innocent so well.

"Jasper protects the ball, while Emmett goes in for the interception, and then you steal the ball."

His crooked smile appeared and my chest tightened painfully. "Let me get this straight, you are the ball in this scenario, right?"

I suppressed a grin as I tried to look serious.

He smiled again and said, "I assure you, I haven't the faintest idea as to what you are referring, all I know, is that the most ravishingly beautiful woman in the room was standing on the dance floor all alone, and I knew I had to do something to stop such a tragedy from continuing."

I looked at him warily.

He touched my cheek and said warmly, "Monday can be business as usual. You can do your worst in the conference room. But tonight, could you give me just one more dance?"

He put his hand out to me and I knew there was no resisting. I forgot how to breathe as my whole body screamed to be in his arms again. I placed my hand securely in his as he slid his other hand behind my back, and I couldn't stop a sigh as I melted against him. I told myself I would leave my other hand resting innocently on his shoulder, but who was I kidding? I ran my fingers along the ridge of his strong, marble shoulders, and rested my fingers on the back of his neck. My thumb ran along his cold skin, and my head screamed out how dangerous this was for me. Seven years of work would now be washed away when he left, but my heart refused to listen. Right now, my heart was winning every argument.

He moved his face so that our cheeks were touching, and then he pulled me so close to his chest that I had to take shallow breaths. He pulled back slightly and I felt his fingers run slowly down my back.

"Why are you trying to stop me from dancing with Thomas?" I asked quietly.

I could feel the rumble in his chest and he stiffened as he said, "Would you mind if we didn't talk about him for the next three minutes?"

I blinked my eyes in surprise but did not press the subject. He was right. This was a precious three minutes. I closed my eyes and although I knew it would hurt all the more, I turned my forehead into his cheek and closed my fingers more tightly around his. I was playing the fool. I knew it. I didn't care. I would have 70 more years to suffer the consequences, but right now, was enough. Let him use me for this dance. Let him take in my scent, let him try to appease his guilt, let him relive old memories, let him have one more dalliance with a human, I didn't care. I didn't care what the reason was. I was in Edward's arms, and I would stay here as long as he seemed to want me.

I had not been paying any attention at all to the song, when suddenly Edward began singing softly right into my ear:

I can only give you love that lasts forever,

And the promise to be near each time you call.

And the only heart I'll own,

Is for you and you alone,

That's all, that's all.

- - -

I can only give you country walks in springtime.

And a hand to hold when leaves begin to fall.

And a love who's burning light,

Will warm the winter night.

That's all, that's all

- - -

All I have are these arms to enfold you,

And a lifetime can never destroy.

- - -

If you're wondering what I am asking in return, dear,

You'll be glad to know that my demands are small.

Say it's me that you adore,

For now and ever more

That's all, that's all.

- - - - - -

As we danced and he sang to me, I saw our future laid out in front of me. A million tomorrows filling me with supreme happiness. I saw our nights, alone and filled with magic and I gritted my teeth at the absolute yearning overtaking me. I saw me surrounded by the love and belonging of his family, I saw me running _beside_ him, the whole fantasy was laid out in a complete and perfect vision.

I felt his arm tighten around me. The song was ending. _No, please no_. I begged and pleaded to just let time finally stop for me, just this once. My arm tightened around his neck and he answered by letting go of my hand and wrapping both arms around me and holding me so tightly against him that I whispered his name.

"Edward."

"Bella." His whisper was rough and full of emotion.

The song was over. I closed my eyes and leaned my forehead on his chin. I knew Vaughn was coming. I looked up and said, "Was it you?"

Edward's brow furrowed and his eyes searched mine. He didn't know what I was asking. Then Vaughn was there, standing a few feet from Edward with his arms folded. I wanted to ask him if he had come into my apartment that night. If all the things I had dreamed he was saying to me, he had actually whispered into my ear. I wasn't ready to let him go.

Edward pulled back slowly and Vaughn grabbed my hand. I jumped at how warm it felt. "Thank you," Edward mouthed the words to me, and then he turned and left. I saw Jasper and Emmett meet him at the elevators. Edward stared at me one more time, and then turned and left. I looked at Vaughn and said, "Do you mind if we sit down for a few minutes?" He ran his hand over my cheek and he frowned.

"Your cheek is so cold."

I brought my hand up to touch my face and nodded. The cold, I never felt. To me, it was burning. I swallowed hard and let him lead me back to the table.

At the end of the evening, Vaughn wasn't going to let me leave alone. We set our teeth and walked off the elevator, but to our surprise, there was no mob. Not one photographer anywhere. As we walked out into the frigid air, I noticed tiny bits of metal reflecting in the snow. I bent down and my eyes widened in shock as I realized what they were. There were tiny pieces of lenses and shutters and flashes scattered everywhere. The cameras had been destroyed and smashed into oblivion. Memories of Edward saving me long ago came flooding back. He had one more save to his credit.

I said goodnight to Vaughn and left him standing in my lobby. I don't think this evening turned out the way he had planned.

I was in bed for a good two minutes before it hit. It was a big one. It took my breath away and I rolled on my stomach and curled in on myself as I held my middle. I felt like I would split in two. I didn't even attempt to stop the tears. It was worth it, I kept telling myself. And it was. Even though it tore and ripped at my insides, I lay in that bed reliving every second of being in Edward's arms again. I was so thankful for fresh memories. I would take better care of these. I wouldn't try so hard to forget them. Now I understood how time could ravage even the sweetest parts. I would take care of them no matter the cost.

I was still curled in a ball, crying and remembering, as the sun shown in my window.

- - - - -

**Did you feel the heat? You guys are the best. Can you give me feedback? See ya tomorrow!**


	12. AMMUNITION

**Man, thank you for your great reviews They were the best yet! One of the best compliments I got were those of you who said that you could picture yourself there. I loved that. I also love how every time there are new reviewers. That means so much to me. You guys say the funniest things too. I just can't express how much I love to read your reviews. **

**There have been a couple of reviews that say they can't believe that I make these chapters up in a day. HOLY FREAKIN CROW!!! Are you serious? I have been writing this story since July. It is a painstakingly slow process for me. I usually don't submit my story until it is all done.**

**Some of you asked about the songs at the ball. They are all Micheal Buble' songs. 1. "Song For You" 2. "Sway" 3. "That's All". Thanks for caring!**

**This is my longest chapter yet. Clearly, I have issues.**

**See ya at the end! **

- - - - - - - - - - -

It was Sunday and I was at the office. It was late at night and I was working on a proposal for a firm that wanted to hire us to handle it's investments being transferred into an offshore bank account. On Saturday, I had called Mr. Hathaway and convinced him I was the best one for the job because they wanted to invest 3 billion dollars and we didn't want to risk losing their business. But truth be told, I was grasping at anything to get my mind off of Friday, and dancing with Edward.

I was in the middle of writing about our specialty of moving large amounts of money to a tax free country such as Botswana, when my cell phone rang.

"Hey Bells."

It was Jake.

His familiar husky voice sent a wave of wistfulness through me. A thousand memories spun in my head, taking me far away from that high-rise office building and placing me on a rocky beach strewn with driftwood trees. My thoughts raced back to a garage made of plastic sheds, warm sodas in a paper bag, a tiny room with one too-small shabby couch, the feverish heat of his big hand around mine, and the flash of his white teeth against his dark skin. I could tell he was smiling when I answered the phone, and I could picture his smile with his teeth showing white against his dark skin.

"Jake, it's so good to hear your voice," I answered. We had written text messages to each other, but I hadn't talked to him since my birthday.

"Are you at the office on a Sunday night?" He chided.

"Yes, I am thinking about moving my bed in here," I was only half joking.

"You work too much, and I have just the solution," he said authoritatively.

"Oh yeah, what's that?"

"Come home for Thanksgiving," he said sincerely.

When there was silence on my end, he sighed and said, "Ah, come on Bells, they can't lock you up in that office for Thanksgiving, it's against the law or something."

I laughed and said, "I don't know, Jake. It's not that I don't want to, it's just that this is a bit of a bad time for me to be leaving."

"Fly out Wednesday night, and fly back Friday morning. You don't even have to stay the whole weekend. Just give us one day." He made it sound so easy. I could never refuse Jake on anything. Well, almost never. If I hadn't refused him all those years ago, we would probably be together right now. I sighed as I thought about how great it would be to spend an easy and slow weekend in LaPush. The food would be delicious, they would all be so happy to see me, and there would be no reminders of what was happening here. I certainly wouldn't have paparazzi following me around, but most of all, there would be no angel face to look at and remind me of what I had lost.

"Did Charlie put you up to this?" I asked suspiciously.

"I was a willing accomplice," he replied.

"How is Charlie?" I was terrible about writing him. I called now and then. He was worse than I was about keeping in touch.

"He is lonely. He misses you and hopes that you'll say yes."

I laughed. "You're shameful, Jake. I will call you tomorrow and see what I can do, okay?"

"I miss you, Bella."

"I miss you too, Jake."

After hanging up, I stared at my cell phone. This was invitation number three. The other two invites were from Renee and Vaughn.

Renee had never cooked a turkey in her life. Well, there was that one year when I was about eleven years old, but it didn't count because the fire department had to come and save us. I still remember her explanation to the firemen.

"I'm so sorry. I had no idea that you had to take the plastic wrapping _off _the turkey before you cooked it!"

That was the year of the Thanksgiving macaroni and cheese. I had taken over in the kitchen exclusively after that. I spent last Thanksgiving with Renee. I missed my mom, but I did not want to spend the whole weekend deflecting her comments about the circles under my eyes, and I definitely didn't want her trying to feed me and talking about how thin I was.

She had called me yesterday after she saw me on the cover of that stupid magazine. She was hysterical. Hysterically happy. She began babbling on about a wedding in the Spring and grandchildren and after 30 minutes of trying to explain that the article was all a lie, I still don't think I convinced her. I really didn't want to put up with that for Thanksgiving.

I wasn't sure what to do about Vaughn. He was playing that day, and his family would be in town for the game. He was inviting me to the game to sit with his parents and his sister and then all go back to his house where his mother would cook dinner. That sounded very serious. He was getting me in with his family, and I couldn't do it.

The difference between kissing Vaughn, and dancing with Edward had been startling. I winced. I didn't want to hurt him. I had to make him understand that I was just too broken to ever love him, or anybody else. It was just bad luck on his part that he was attracted to me.

I could always spend Thanksgiving at the office treating it like any other day. I would get loads done without anyone here to bother me.

The big problem with going to see Jake and Charlie, was that I hadn't been home in over five years. I never planned on going back there. I had met them in Seattle a few times and spent the weekend, but that was as close as I'd get. This time, more than any other time, would be very difficult.

I wondered what Jake would think if he knew that Edward was here. I then smirked internally as I thought of what Edward would think if he knew I was going to LaPush to spend time with werewolves for Thanksgiving. All of the sudden, I froze.

Edward had been doing a masterful job in the negotiations. His mind reading and brilliance had killed so many of our strategies.

Edward had left me months before Jacob changed. I stood up and began pacing around the room.

I realized I may have just found the ammunition I needed to muddy the waters of that perfect vampire mind of his. I'd had a plan in the works for weeks now, but Edward was always so aware of everything that was going on, that I thought it close to impossible to pull off. Maybe I had finally found a way.

There was however, a problem. The problem was, if I succeeded in my plan, there was a chance Edward would be gone within the week. I was afraid for myself at how much that hurt me. I always knew this day would come. I had just been planning on it being some time after the first of the year. I didn't want him to go.

I sat at my desk holding my middle, trying to decide what I should do. Implement my plan, and possibly have Edward gone in a few days, or prolong this torture of seeing him everyday just to have him leave anyway. And that was the truth of it. No matter what, he was going to leave. He could dance with me, sing songs into my ear, and hold me as close to him as he ever did, but at some point, I would walk into that conference room knowing I would never see him again. And I would watch him walk away.

My middle exploded as if he had already left. I bit my lip and fought a war in my head. My heart could have no say in this battle. I had to look at this like any other business decision I had ever made. I had to look at what would keep me sane. I had to keep my wits about me and think about my own life, as pathetic as it was. I had my future with this company to think about. I had to support myself. Rational, sensible, logical, intelligent, and steady. These were all words used to describe me before I saw Edward again. I had to rescue me.

If I did this now, I would have to make some concessions with the deal. The firm would never have France, Italy, and Alaska. C-CORP had them protected too well. I didn't care. I would take whatever I could get. Just let this be done.

I leaned on my desk and put my head in my hands. Edward would probably hate me if I did this. His family would feel betrayed.

But he'd said it himself on Friday night, "Monday can be business as usual . . . You can do your worst."

I swallowed hard. My mouth tasted stale and sour. This was not the taste of the hunt that I loved so much. This was something much more sinister. I worried that desperation was clouding my judgment and that I was putting my need to get Edward away from me above all else. No. I had to do this. I would do it.

I was taking a chance. Everything I could use against Edward were things that I remembered from when he said he loved me. Probably none of this would matter to him now, but it was worth taking the risk. I called Simmons and told him to meet me in my office at 6:00 a.m., an hour before the meeting, then I began making a plan. I had many more calls to make. I had never lost, and I had no intentions of starting now.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Simmons' dark brown eyes stared at me. "You want me to do _what_?" He asked incredulously.

I put my hands up in defense. "Look, I know it sounds crazy, but nothing else is working, and I want to see if this will."

"Are you really expecting that he is going to read my mind, or something? There's more you're not telling me about Edward Cullen, isn't there?" His face looked very suspicious.

_Simmons, you have no idea_. That was what I thought, what I actually said was, "Don't be ridiculous, what he does is just sort of a clever trick he used to do at parties to delude people into thinking he _could_ read minds. I am afraid he is using it in our meetings. I just want to test him to see if he is using the trick, or not. The subjects I gave you were sort of a private joke between us. It probably won't even work but it's worth a try, are you ready?"

"Go over it with me one more time," he said with a tired look in his eye.

We went over it twice to make sure he was ready, and then we went down to the conference room. A few of our lawyers were there, but none of the C- CORP team had arrived. That was good, I was hoping that Edward had not been in the building or close enough to hear our conversation. After about ten minutes, they all began to file in.

I tensed as he came into the room. I hadn't seen him since Friday and I didn't know how to react. I watched the perfect angel walk in with unconscious grace. He walked up to me and said, "Good Morning." He had never done that before. He smiled at me and I saw that his eyes were much more golden than when I had seen him on Friday. His face was luminous. He sighed deep and looked far into my eyes for a moment and then went to take his seat. I felt the heat permeating through me. Every time I saw him, I was amazed all over again.

The memories of Friday night came charging at me and I had to blink to clear my head as I sat down and swiveled in my chair and turned away from him. I almost lost my courage. I took a deep breath and greeted everyone.

We were two hours into our meeting and trying to hammer out the details of acquiring the financial records of one of C- CORP'S Russian affiliates when I could see Edward whisper to Harry Banks about something I am sure he heard in the mind of one of my lawyers. They began writing down furiously and nodding their heads. It was time to put my plan into action.

I looked at Dale Bennett, he was one of my firm's newer lawyers that Edward would not be familiar with, and gulped. He nodded back slightly, letting me know that all was in place. I would only get one chance at this. Edward would never fall for it again. I made the signal to Simmons by putting one finger on the top of my coffee cup. I saw him sit up slightly and I felt beads of sweat on my forehead as I thought about what Simmons was thinking.

"_I have to remember to ask Bella what time she is leaving for Thanksgiving to visit LaPush and see Jake Black."_

Edward's head had been turned to Harry Banks, when all of the sudden he whipped around and stared first at Simmons, then at me. From the corner of my eye, I saw that his jaw was clenched. I never looked at him, but began my line of questioning again to one of Edward's lawyers. He just kept staring at me and thankfully, for the moment, was preoccupied by his own thoughts, and not what was happening around him.

After about thirty seconds, he came back to the present conversation and I signaled to Simmons again.

"_I hope Bella doesn't ride those motorcycles with Jake while she's there. She told me she ended up in the emergency room almost every time she rode it. Jake never should have taught her to ride that stupid motorcycle."_

All of the sudden, there was a low growl in the room and every head turned to see where it came from. Edward coughed loudly to cover it.

"Excuse me," he said hoarsely.

I saw his hand run quickly across his face. Jasper looked at Edward with a concerned look and Edward just stared back at him with dark angry eyes. His face flashed to mine and I used every bit of my resolve to keep speaking.

"As I was saying, by December 15th, I would like to know the stock equivalents of the holdings in Moscow, Brotska, and Minsk. I need them for our end of year analysis." I droned on for another few minutes, and then saw that Edward had calmed down enough to pay attention to the proceedings. Time to signal Simmons.

"_At least Bella can't go cliff diving. The water will be too cold for that. Last time she tried, she came so close to dying that Jake had to revive her."_

Edward rose out of his seat and gripped the edge of the table. All eyes were on him. Harry Banks put his hand on Edward's arm. He looked concerned as he tried to pull Edward back down into his seat. Jasper looked at me. I shrugged as I stared back innocently.

Jasper turned to Edward. "Do we need to take a break?" He asked, seeming very concerned.

Edward was looking down at the table. His jaw was clenched down hard. I was surprised. This was working much, much better than I had anticipated. Simmons glanced once at me with wide eyes and looked quickly away.

"Is something wrong, Mr. Cullen?" I feigned boredom.

He slowly brought his head up to look at me. He was attempting to show the others in the room that he was fine, but I could see the anger and rage in his face. His mouth was a tight line and he was breathing hard though his nose. His gaze held me and I almost felt afraid. Almost.

"Do you need to leave the room, Mr. Cullen?" I asked impatiently. I should receive an academy award for this, at least a daytime Emmy.

He shook his head slowly. "I'm fine." He said flatly.

He slowly sat back down as he kept his eyes on me. I was shaking as I said, "We have only a few more items to discuss. I glanced at the clock on the wall. We will be done in twenty minutes."

Dale Bennett, recognized the signal and immediately excused himself and left the room. I was amazed I was able to keep my voice detached and bored as I droned on through more legal documents and arguing on trivial business matters. After ten minutes, I knew it was time for the last blow.

I signaled to Simmons.

"_Bella would be very angry if she knew I overheard her conversation with Jake Black. I wonder what she meant when she said she's worried Charlie will find out that Jake is a werewolf."_

There was a loud crack under the table and I heard a murderous growl deep in Edward's chest. He stared up at me and his eyes were so black I stumbled back a step away from the table. At that moment, Jasper's phone rang. He looked to see who it was, and then answered it immediately. I was guessing it was Alice. Hopefully, she would be too late.

A moment later, Dale Bennett came walking back into the room, and looked at me triumphantly. Jasper slumped down into his seat, his head in his hands. Edward was still staring at me when he caught Jasper's reaction. I saw the recognition on his face as he read Jasper's thoughts. Then he slowly turned back and looked at me. His expression was livid.

My eyes stayed on Edward as I said, "Mr. Bennett, do you have an announcement?"

Dale Bennett stood up and proudly said, "As of two minutes ago, we have acquired three more shares of C- CORP. That elevates Berkshire-Hathaway over C- CORP with us holding 51 percent of the company." I never took my eyes off Edward. The plan had worked beautifully, and my heart was breaking.

Edward's lawyers flew out of their seats as if an explosion went off. There was yelling and accusations made from both sides of the table as Edward continued to look at me. His emotion slowly turned from fury to betrayal.

So it was over then. We now owned the company and all negotiations had changed. It was all legal business now. No need for a former owner of the company to be here. I felt a sob rise in my throat. I smashed it down just like so many times before.

I looked back at the group and raised my voice as I said, "Gentlemen, why don't we have lunch and meet back here at 2:00. We will have one more meeting tomorrow." I turned to look at Harry. "Your team will need to come to the meeting tomorrow with a plan of how you will proceed with the transfer, and then we will put this matter behind us."

Harry's face was dark red. He loathed me. "This is not over yet, Ms. Swan." His teeth were clenched tight. He glared at me and said, "You were already on shaky ground with France, Italy, and Alaska. I will use that leverage to rally the other companies behind us. They won't leave without a fight. You are in for the battle of your life, Ms. Swan!"

I didn't give a response. I gathered my things and walked swiftly from the room. The door didn't shut behind me. I didn't turn around to see who it was.

"Bravo, to your great performance." His musical voice was heavily laced with sarcasm.

"Hello, Edward, anything wrong?" I asked virtuously.

"Enough, Bella." He was walking next to me and moved his head closer to mine so no one else could hear as he said, "We need to talk."

"We just sat in the same room for three hours. You could have said anything you wanted to in there." I said sharply.

His voice showed great restraint, with anger tinged around the edges. "If you would rather, I will wait until the conference room is full to discuss how I can't believe that you would deceive me and take away my family's company after they all accepted and loved you."

I stared sideways at him and fumed. He probably would try something like that. News of a scene like that one would spread through the office like wildfire. I stopped and glared at him. He stopped too, keeping his face inches from mine.

"I don't have time to talk to you right now." I growled.

"Clear your schedule." He said quickly.

"No." I said folding my arms.

We were close to my office and he, unbelievably, lifted me up and put me gently on the floor of my office and turned back to the door. He looked at Sally, my receptionist and said in his warm voice. "Please clear Ms. Swan's schedule for the next half hour or longer." She stared at him with a shocked look on her face.

"Call security!" I shouted.

He turned back to me. "Do you really want to see what I'll do to your security, or could we just have a discussion like two adults."

Sally stared at me with the phone in her hand. "Forget it Sally." I grumbled and shut my door.

I waited a few seconds before turning around. I had to ready myself to look at him. Edward was here in my office. _I'm tough_, I reminded myself. _I just gained control of his company. I beat a vampire at his own game. I am going to win. _There were still many details to be ironed out in this fight with C- CORP but I had just sped things up considerably. _I can do this._ _Fight, Bella. Remember he doesn't love you. He doesn't love you._

I turned around and said coldly, "You're on the clock, Cullen. You have thirty minutes or less."

"That was quite a trick you played on me in there," he said through clenched teeth.

"It is no different from all the times you've had the upper hand because of the small fact that you can read every mind in the room," I retorted.

"_Almost_ every mind." He sounded extremely frustrated.

"It was a foregone conclusion. I was just hastening the process." I said heartlessly.

"From the very start you have been manipulative and deceitful in your tactics." His voice had risen slightly.

"Thank you," I smiled.

"The Bella I knew would never have done this to my family." His muscles were tense as he pointed his finger at me.

I strengthened my resolve. "The Bella you knew was a trusting girl who would have followed you anywhere."

His voice was barely a whisper. "Where did she go?"

"Gone forever." I spoke with complete finality. I walked away from him and put my briefcase down on a side table and then went over to my bar to get a glass of water.

He turned towards me and said angrily, "You do realize what that money means for me and my family, don't you?"

I swallowed hard. I had to keep with the "Tough Bella" theme. "You made millions off the deal. Start over, it's all the rage right now."

He walked up to me and said in a low voice. "Times have changed since we started this company. There is too much information that we can't risk divulging to start over."

I tried to sound flippant. "Do what everybody else does. Live off the interest."

He looked at me as if I wasn't getting it. "We didn't live off the money that you see on the ledgers you throw around in those meetings. That is all a front. There are back channels, and loop-holes, and safety nets to make the money we do use untraceable."

He was walking around the room running his hand through his hair. "Bella, do you realize that Carlisle has been building C- CORP since 1731?"

My eyes flew up at him with a look of shock. "I didn't see anything on the records before 1906."

He was shaking his head. He had pursed his lips in a hard line as he said, "Record keeping was not very reliable before 1900. He used that to help build businesses for others like him and make it so that they were all free to live away from the public eye. They are not going to go quietly, Bella. You could be in this fight with Harry for years."

I gulped. _Others like him?_ . . . "You mean to tell me that all of these businesses are run by _vampires?"_ I asked incredulously.

He blew out air angrily as he walked around my office. He shook his head as if I had no idea what I had done today. He walked past my large window and glanced at my desk. Suddenly, he stopped and gazed at the pictures I had put there. I had three, one of Renee, one of Charlie, and one of me and Jake. His face rested on the one of me and Jake. All traces of anger left his face.

"Not all of them, but many of them," he murmured.

I was slightly unnerved. How many vampires did I have business dealings with on a daily basis? Nervously I asked, "Are these vegetarian . . . or non-vegeterian?"

He picked up the picture of me and Jake and examined it more closely. It was taken shortly before I graduated from High School.

"Most of them share our way of life," he said quietly.

_Most_ of them? That wasn't very encouraging.

He continued to look at the picture. Jake and I were out at First Beach with Sam and the others. I had an easy smile on my face. It was early Spring and my cheeks were pink and flushed from the cold. I had a sweatshirt and levi's on and we were sitting on a log by a fire. The sun had just started to go down casting a beautiful sunset behind us. Jake and I were holding hands. I was looking at the camera, and Jake was staring at me. The look on Edward's face was unfathomable. He gripped the picture in both of his hands and swallowed hard. Finally, he gently laid the frame on the desk. He turned and looked out my window.

"You have a beautiful view," he said softly.

I was beginning to get a little confused. I expected to feel the "Wrath of Edward". I was aware of what kind of temper he had. Instead, he asked me a question.

"Bella, you are very successful, with a corner office at the top investment firm in New York City, you are going to have your name on the building soon, and you have the respect of all you have worked with. But, are you happy?"

He turned and his golden eyes bore into me. I had been standing on the other side of my desk and he came around in front of me and sat against the desk. He brought his face inches from mine and asked, "Did you get everything you ever wanted?"

I didn't have any of the things I wanted. True love, a family, happiness, forever . . .

"I am doing fine." I said softly. Even I knew that didn't sound very convincing. "What about you?" I asked, while struggling to keep my breathing even.

He shook his head slowly. "I don't have _any_ of the things I want."

My pulse thudded in my ears. _Say you want me_, I begged inside. I closed my eyes. I had to stop this. I had to drastically change the subject.

I straightened as I said, "By the way, I want you to know that Simmons has no idea what is going on or . . . what you are."

"Are you," He stopped as if he were deliberating his question. He then continued, and said the words quickly. "Are you going back to Forks to spend Thanksgiving with Jacob Black?"

I hadn't made my mind up until that moment. "Yes, I am. Charlie too."

He stiffened a bit. "Is Jacob really a werewolf?" He spoke these words much more slowly, through clenched teeth.

"Yes." I said simply.

"Do you . . . spend a lot of time with him?" He was struggling mightily to keep calm.

"Not now, but for the year and a half before I left for college we were together everyday."

He stiffened again, and he put his head down and closed his eyes. His body twitched slightly as he looked up at me.

"You shouldn't be around werewolves, Bella." His face was twisted and his fists were clenched.

"I am completely safe around Jake and the rest of the pack," I said defensively.

"The _rest_ of the pack?" His eyes widened and turned dark and menacing.

My eyes bored in on him as I folded my arms and said acidly, "It's really none of your business, is it?"

He ran his hands through his hair and then his long perfect fingers ran lightning quick over his face. He closed his eyes and took a long breath.

"Werewolves are dangerous and unpredictable and you need to stay away from them," he hissed.

I blinked at the shock. I was getting angry. "Thanks for the advice," I said flatly.

"You promised," he whispered.

His mouth-watering scent swirled in my face.

"What do you mean?" I huffed.

His expression changed and I had to take a sharp intake of breath. His eyes were the exact color of topaz that always sent me over the edge. I felt my chest cave in as he moved closer to me. His fingers brushed my cheek. It had the same outcome as the first time he did that. My eyes flickered shut for a moment as I savored his touch.

He said gently, "You promised me you wouldn't do anything reckless. You said you would be careful."

I stared at him and thought how if he held me tight right now, how easily I could forget everything. Forget that seven years had passed, forget how I lay on the wet ground shivering and sobbing for hours when he left, how I had cried in my bed begging him in my mind to appear at my window, how I had become someone so closed off to any emotion that I didn't even know who I was anymore. I backed up a step, trying to break the spell he still so obviously had on me.

"Are all those things true?" He said as he stepped forward and closed the space between us again.

"All what things," I stammered.

"Do you really ride motorcycles with Jake Black and jump off cliffs and push things to the point that you are rushed to emergency rooms and being revived from near death?"

"I was never _rushed_ to the emergency room, I _usually_ walked in on my own." I argued.

"Bella." He said it just like he used to.

I watched his impossibly long dark lashes hide his eyes for a moment before he looked up at me and said, "I can't live in a world where you don't exist."

I remembered him saying that to me once before. We had been lying on my couch watching Romeo and Juliet and he was whispering the lines in my ear. He had held me so tight as we laid there. That night, when he said that to me, I couldn't imagine us ever being apart. My fate, future, and destiny were already decided and I wanted nothing but him. I couldn't believe that I deserved such good fortune. This archangel.

Then my world fell out from under me.

I blinked away the hot tears that were forming dangerously close to the surface and said, "The last time you said that to me, three days later you told me you no longer loved me and left me standing there alone and . . ." I backed up as I said, "You have no say over my life or what I do."

I blinked furiously and with force I said, "How dare you. . . You don't want to ever see me again, but you should still be able to tell me what I can and can't do?"

"Bella . . . . "

I walked closer to my door and said in a low voice, "You had seven years to seek me out and you did _nothing_. If I hadn't searched out your company, you still would have no idea where I was." I set my back against my door as I hissed, "You arrogant vampire."

I leaned forward and narrowed my eyes as I growled, "I will ride motorcycles and crash, I will jump off cliffs and nearly drown, and I will also play with werewolves whenever I want and you have nothing to say about it."

I opened my door. I was about to storm out when in a flash he was beside me and said in a perfect velvet voice, "Don't go, I want you to know the truth." He calmly shut the door again.

I clenched my teeth as I said, "I have been painfully aware of the truth for seven years." I took a deep breath and in a broken voice I said, "Look Edward, I will make this as easy as I can." My insides throbbed and I felt the pain rip in a new and much more painful way. I had to say it.

"Edward, this is the last time you and I will talk. You want to know why I pulled this stunt today? I did it because I want you gone. I want you out of here. I can't stand this anymore, do you understand? This has dragged on long enough."

I looked into his face. That was a mistake. His face was beautiful. It was full of passion and longing as his eyes danced and struggled to hold in his emotion. He swallowed hard and began shaking his head slowly as he said, "The way you danced with me on Friday night tells me otherwise."

I opened my mouth to speak but then shut it again. I had to think up a good argument fast. I backed up a step from him and said, "What happened Friday was . . ."

"Wonderful." He whispered.

"No, it was pointless." I was holding on by a very thin thread. I could feel my heart begin its screaming for his touch. It was demanding I pull him close to me and feel myself in his arms again.

I backed up another step. "Dancing with you was also reckless, irrational, foolish, careless, rash, ill considered, and senseless."

Every time I took a step backward, he followed me. I was growing increasingly desperate.

He was suddenly right in front of me. He put his hands on each side of my face and said, "That dance meant as much to you as it did to me, and you'll never love Thomas Vaughn."

I was so confused. I had no idea what he was doing. I pulled away from him and shook my head as I said, "Stop it! You just don't get it! You are not to come near me. This will not happen again. Don't worry about me and what happened in the past. It's over. It's done with. I have moved on and I don't need you to make sure I am all right. I don't need you to check up on me or feel that you need to mend or fix the situation." All the air escaped out of my lungs as I set my shoulders and said, "Edward, I set you free."

His eyes masked over with hurt and anger. He exhaled sharply with frustration as he grabbed me by the shoulders and drew me up to his face.

"No!" He blurted out through clenched teeth. There was fierce determination on his face as he pulled me closer to him. He brought his head down so that our foreheads and noses were touching. I closed my eyes as my hands clasped onto his stone arms.

A loud knock shook the door. "Swan, everything okay in there?" It was Mr. Hathaway.

I blinked my eyes as I struggled to gain control of my senses. My legs were weak and I knew my heart was pounding madly. I released my grip on Edward's arms, and attempted to step back. Edward exhaled slowly and held on to me a moment longer before letting go.

"This isn't over." He said resolutely.

"Yes, Edward. It is."

His jaw was clenched tightly as I shakily opened my door. Mr. Hathaway looked at us with suspicion and bewilderment. "Your secretary thought I should stop by and see if you needed anything."

I was aware that the entire time I looked at Mr. Hathaway, Edward was staring at me.

I took two steps to the side and said roughly, "I am fine Mr. Hathaway. Thank you."

Mr. Hathaway's eyes kept darting from me to Edward. Then he looked at me and his eyes narrowed. "I need to talk to you in my office, Ms. Swan." His gravel voice sounded so harsh after Edward's lilting, musical one.

"Yes, Mr. Hathaway." My breathing alone had to tell him something was up between me and Edward.

I stormed out leaving Edward standing in my office alone and followed Mr. Hathaway to his office.

What was Edward doing to me? It made no sense. I wanted to get this over with so that he could just leave me alone and then go back to Ireland, or wherever. Why did he have to keep trying to talk to me? Why did he keep trying to get close to me? Didn't he know what he was doing to me? Why? Why? Why?

Guilt. That was all I could come up with. He always had that tendency to put all the blame for everything on him. He could probably see that I was not handling things very well.

Guilty conscience or not, I would not give him the opportunity to talk to me again. It was much too painful. I was never going to get over him if he talked to me this way. He never explained anything. He never told me where he'd been for seven years. He never opened up about anything. All he did was sing to me and drive me crazy with passion and then tell me I couldn't see Jake anymore.

We approached Mr. Hathaway's office. He wasn't yet aware that I was giving C-CORP concessions on the deal. I was fairly certain he wouldn't like it.

We walked in his office and he sat down hard in a big overstuffed chair and said, "How goes the acquisition of C- CORP? Is everything on schedule?"

I sat down on the couch across from him and said, "Yes sir, everything is right on track. We acquired the 51 percent today, so we are moving right along." I took a deep breath and tried to make my argument sound compelling. "C- CORP is very . . . clever and they have created a few delays. They may end up keeping their operations in France, Italy, and Alaska, but the majority will be bought and sold."

"Why aren't we able to get their holdings in France, Italy and Alaska?" He asked angrily.

I shifted a little in my seat, "Well sir, these are their strongest companies and their stockholders are holding on tight. They don't want to leave C- CORP. Frankly, it would delay things further to keep strong arming them to sell out. There is enough money to be made by going for what we know. Still well over 26 billion dollars worth."

Mr. Hathaway stared at me as if I was in kindergarten and he was about to teach me an important lesson. "Isabella, you say there is _enough_ money to be made, I want _all_ the money. We could make close to 10 billion dollars more from squeezing them dry." He leaned forward in his chair and frowned. "Why am I telling you this? These are tactics you have been perfecting on clients since I hired you. It's what is getting your name on the building."

Suddenly, getting my name on the building didn't seem as important as my sanity.

I cleared my throat and said, "I believe that after we are through paying legal fees for six more months and paying interns to do all the grunt work, we will get significantly less than 10 billion dollars, and we will have lost many other important opportunities at other worthwhile companies. The cost is too great."

Mr. Hathaway got right in my face. "How about this cost. As soon as the business world sees us letting one company keep something instead of annihilating them, others will think that we have lost our edge, that we have gone soft. We will lose the fear factor, and at that point, we will begin to slip from number one to number two. How is that for cost?" He stared at me without flinching.

"I see your point," I said flatly.

He then spoke in a softer and yet somehow more menacing voice. "You can never let personal feelings get in the way of success."

I knew my bottom lip was trembling. I bit on it to stop it and then said, "I understand."

He stood up and began walking to his desk, without turning to me he said, "Do not let me down, Swan."

"Don't worry, sir," I said with growing nausea, "I will bring C- CORP down."

I walked out his door and began numbly walking to my office. Edward would soon be gone, but it was not over. We owned the company, but there was no way that this was truly over when France, Italy, and Alaska were on the table. It was going to drag on until next year. Because Edward still had financial stake in those countries, he could realistically at some point come back for negotiations. I could feel the hole ripping and tearing.

Sally met me outside my office with a stack of files and began speaking to me. She could have been speaking some ancient form of Arabic for all the sense she was making. I put all my effort into concentrating on her voice, but I was too far gone. I squinted hard at her and finally I shook my head and said, "Sally, I have a splitting headache. Could you make sure no one comes in my office until I tell you I'm feeling better?"

Her face became sympathetic and she took the files from me and guided me into my office. She shut the door behind me after assuring me that no one would disturb me.

My hands went into my hair and I felt the tears dangerously close. I thought I was so tough. I was falling apart. I pushed my large leather chair to the side and crawled into the space it left under my desk. I cried and held myself tight as I shook. After a while, I checked my watch and sighed. The meeting with C - CORP was to resume in thirty minutes. I crawled out from the desk and called Sally and asked her to cancel the meeting. I would just see them tomorrow anyway. There was no chance of me walking in there like this. I couldn't explain away this level of lunacy.

Once I was safely back in the small space, I told myself that this was no time to fall apart. C- CORP was so close to being ours, and years from now this would just be a faint memory. But all my heart cared about was getting Edward back. He had been in here less than an hour ago, and my heart had not forgotten. It just wanted Edward.

I eventually saw the sky begin to darken. That didn't mean much, I scoffed. It was dark by 4:30 in the winter. Still, I knew I needed to get out of this little space and get back to work. Another hour went by.

I heard a faint knock on the door, and I stiffened. It was silent for about two minutes, and I relaxed again, thinking that whomever it was finally left. Suddenly, the door opened slowly and I tucked in my feet, hoping they would find my office empty and go away. I heard footsteps coming closer, and I vowed I would fire Sally tomorrow for not doing her job. She had lasted longer than any secretary I'd had anyway.

There were two feet standing right in front of my desk. They paused there, and then much to my horror, the person knelt down and looked at me. It was Simmons.

His eyes grew wide, and then when he saw the state I was in, his face became softer as he asked, "Bella, what are you doing?"

I sniffed and wiped my nose on the back of my hand. He reached up on my desk and handed me a box of tissue. I smiled through my tears and pulled out a handful and very ungracefully blew my nose.

"Come here often?" He asked with a puzzled look on his face.

I was still wiping my nose and eyes. A small pile of used tissue was building up beside me.

He sat down, leaning his shoulder against the side of the desk, and smiled slightly. "You have been doing so well, you should be very proud of yourself."

"What are you talking about?" I choked out.

"Well, I assume this has everything to do with Edward Cullen, does it not?"

I thought of protesting, but I knew he would never buy it. I started to cry again, and I just nodded my head.

He let out a frustrated sigh and said, "Bella, if you took two seconds to notice, I think you would see Edward feels the same way. He may not be sitting under a desk crying right now, but I am almost certain that he is still in love with you."

"_Almost_ certain?" I said between sniffs. "You are so wrong."

He ran his fingers through his hair and said, "I would be an idiot if I sat in all these meetings with C- CORP and didn't notice the way that Edward looks at you. It's as if no one else in the whole room exists but you."

_He was probably just remembering how good my blood tasted,_ I thought. I just snorted in derision.

"I watched the two of you dance on Friday." He shook his head appreciatively. "I can't believe he let you leave with Thomas. The two of you were in your own private universe." He lowered his voice as he said, "I have never danced with anyone the way you two were dancing."

"You're right though, he did leave. Just like every other time," I whispered hoarsely.

"Perhaps he is getting mixed signals between the dance floor and the conference room," he offered.

"You're not helping," I barked.

"Was Edward a jerk to you? Did he like ever physically hurt you or anything? He asked.

_No, he wouldn't even kiss me for longer than ten seconds because he was so paranoid about hurting me._ "No, never. Why do you ask?" I managed to say.

"Your plan worked a little _too_ well on Edward today. I saw a bit of a temper break that otherwise very composed face. He seems to care about you quite a bit," he said hesitantly.

I just stared at him. Anything I said about that subject would be unwise.

"You have to talk to him, Bella. Your big fortress is up and he is trying to find a way in and you keep shooting him down before he can scale the wall."

"Mike . . ." I began. I had to swallow and wipe at my eyes again before I could continue. "He left _me_ . . . all those years ago, he told me he didn't love me anymore. He never tried to find me, and now that this is all over, he will leave again. I am just trying to hold it together until he's gone."

Simmons was exasperated. "Well, by all means, keep sitting under your desk instead of telling him how you feel. It seems to be working well for you."

I smiled a little. "I'm coming out," I announced.

He backed up and let me out, then he helped me to my feet.

"Tomorrow will be business as usual," I said toughly.

He raised an eyebrow at me.

"Oh come on, every girl needs a good cry now and then," I said lightheartedly.

"I wasn't aware your species was considered female, though I have watched as in the last two months more human characteristics have reared their ugly head in you, than in the last two years combined."

I slugged him hard in the arm and we walked out. I needed to go home. I was surprised to see that Sally and just about everybody else in the building had left for the night.

Suddenly, his face perked up. "Bella, you know. . . tomorrow's meeting is all about the infrastructure of the shares and how to assure their strength once the company's been acquired."

"Yeah, so?" I prompted him to finish.

"Well that, as you know, is my specialty. I wrote my Master's Thesis on the importance of maintaining the strength of the stock." He looked at me proudly.

My eyebrows furrowed at him. "And you're telling me this because. . ."

"Well, I can handle the meeting tomorrow. There is no reason you need to subject yourself to seeing Edward tomorrow. Let me do it, leave for Thanksgiving a day early, and I'll call you as soon as the meeting's over and give you a play by play synopsis."

I thought that idea over. I wasn't sure how I was going do this tomorrow. I might actually be a detriment at this point. I would do anything not to have to watch Edward walk out that door for possibly the last time.

I stopped as we waited for the elevator and said, "Do you promise to call me if there are any problems?"

He smiled. He seemed proud that I would put this trust in him. "Absolutely," he said confidently.

"Thank you," I sighed. "Just this one time and I will be right back in the fight," I said with vigor.

He nodded his head knowingly. "Of course."

I entered the elevator thankful to have an assistant that I could trust.

I, hopefully, had seen Edward for the last time.

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**I know, I know. You all hate my stinking guts. This wasn't my favorite chapter either. Pay-off tomorrow - I promise! Let me know what you think, even if you want to yell at me. We're almost done guys! See ya tomorrow, I hope . . . . .**


	13. THE GIFT

**You guys are much too kind! I think your reviews are getting better, if that's possible. You are disscussing things with me and critiquing the characters and laughing and crying with Bella. I am so sad this story is ending. I don't want to let you all go!**

**See ya at the end!**

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**(Edward's POV)**

I was pacing around the hotel room. Jasper had left hours earlier. He'd had enough of my torment. It was driving him mad. My mind kept switching back and forth between everything that had happened that day. My emotions changed from fury, to disbelief, to sorrow, to frustration and back to fury again. There was just too much to take in.

The words reverberated through me. "I set you free." Free. I would never be free of her. Long after this world continued spinning I would be somewhere . . . existing . . . still tied to Bella.

Apparently I had completely misread everything. I was so sure after I had stayed the night with her by the fireplace and listened to her call my name over and over that it was only a matter of time before we were reunited. To lay by her through the night was more than I ever thought I would have again. It was exhilarating, thrilling, and beautiful. It was my heaven. Being that close to Bella now that she was no longer a child sent such stronger feelings of passion coursing through me than I thought I was capable of. Now, I was losing her.

The way we danced Friday night was the most amazing feeling I had ever experienced. I wanted her in every imaginable way. She had put her arm so tightly around my neck and her fingers had wrapped so firmly around my own. Her heart was absolutely flying. I was so sure that she was feeling the same intensity, the same yearning. Instead she tricked me, stole my company from me, and told me to get lost.

Bella and werewolves. No. It was absolutely inconceivable. I had left to keep Bella safe, and she had become best friends with a pack of werewolves? No. No. NO. Dirty, unpredictable DOGS! My muscles seized every time I thought of it. I was grunting my disgust. In that picture Bella had been holding Jacob's hand. I clenched my teeth uncontrollably.

Now, here I had been so worried about Bella and Thomas Vaughn. Was there a chance Bella was in love with a _werewolf?_ They had spent everyday together for a year and a half. That was longer than I had with her. Maybe she had pulled away from Thomas' kiss not because of me, but because of Jacob. She never would have turned to him if I hadn't . . . I never would have let her out of my sight if I had known. . . They could have killed her . . .

I was a complete, absolute, unadulterated idiot. What had I done?

My hours of pacing had done nothing to alleviate my desperation.

In her office, I had been so angry at her for what she actions in the Conference room. I felt justified in my fury at her betrayal. And then I had seen that picture of her and Jake. I once again saw the Bella I knew. I remembered how she had been so sweet, warm and trusting. The look in her eyes in the picture was a stark reminder of how much Bella had changed. I looked at her now and knew this was all my fault. It was not her, but myself, I should be angry at. It was my choices that had set this all in motion.

Even though I was sure Alice had already told him, I had to make the call to Carlisle. He was disheartened at the turn of events. But, true to his nature he ended up making me feel better about everything. He said we could start over somehow and make the family even closer through our efforts. He was in Belgium and offered to come and take over, but I emphatically declined. I would see this through. None of this would be happening if it weren't for my stupidity.

I thought about what she had said. It was all in the past. I didn't need to check up on her or worry about her, or feel the need to fix the situation. What in the hell did she think I was doing? She truly had no idea how I really felt.

In the middle of the night, after hours of pacing, I finally resolved to go see her. I didn't know if it was the right decision after all she had said to me today, but it certainly couldn't get any worse. It didn't matter now. I had to make her understand. I took the stairs and easily got into her apartment. She wasn't there. It was the middle of the night. I stared out her large window at the cityscape. Where could she be? _Please don't be with_ _Thomas or Jake_, I begged. I felt so heavy. So dejected and alone.

As I sat there in the silence, I was afraid. I had maybe two days left in the conference room before my authority as acting CEO was stripped from me. Yesterday had hurt me in so many ways, and I was beginning to feel my days with Bella were numbered. It was as if I wanted to store up every moment I could with her so that I would have as many memories as possible after she sent me away. I needed all the time with her I could get, these memories were going to have to last a long, long time.

As I looked at Bella's apartment, I could see that she had not brought one part of her past life with her. Everything I saw in this place was new and modern and hard. She seemed to have thoroughly turned her back on her past life. She had tried to forget it all.

I sat down and looked out at the night. Everything about Bella seemed tenuous and uncertain. But there was one thing of which I was absolutely sure. Even after all she had done, after all the manipulations and contemptible things she had subjected me to, I still loved her completely. I loved her fully and totally.

I waited for her all night, she never came home.

The next morning, Jasper and I sat in the conference room as I anxiously waited for Bella. Through all the weeks of meetings, she never came until we were all seated. I had no reason to believe today would be any different. It was almost as if she wanted to make a grand entrance. No matter what, I had to tell her how I felt. If I had to stand on the table and declare my feelings for her in front of everyone in this room, I would do it. She could do whatever she wanted to with that knowledge.

Michael Simmons abruptly came in to the conference room and stood in front of us and announced that he was in charge of the meeting. Anxiety clouded my judgment as I blurted out, "Where is Ms. Swan?"

He looked around nonchalantly as he said, "She is involved in some pressing matters of business. She sends her regrets, but I am sure that we will have a productive meeting today regardless of Ms. Swan's absence."

My eyes narrowed suspiciously. Bella hadn't let herself be out of the loop on one minuscule detail, and all of the sudden she was going to miss a whole meeting? Something was wrong. I pressed through his mind for more, but he had become very good these last weeks at keeping me out.

My lawyers, Harry especially, seemed quite relieved to have her gone. Jasper glanced at me with surprise. My mind went through possible reasons for her not being here. Perhaps she wasn't feeling well or there was an emergency of some kind. Perhaps Hathaway had demanded she be on another assignment. Perhaps she had gone somewhere with Thomas. Maybe she had gone to be with Jake. My insides tightened painfully at that possibility.

The meeting was under way and I sat up and forced myself to pay attention to the proceedings. Simmons proved to be a very astute and intelligent man. I could see why Bella had him lead her team. At the rate it was going, I would have one more day in the conference room.

We had been going at it for hours and we were close to finishing. Harry was in the middle of a lengthy speech. In the middle of his droning on, I suddenly heard my name.

_Mr. Cullen, if you can hear me, touch the side of your face._

It was Simmons. I made no move indication that I had heard him. Was this another trick? I decided to play along for the moment. I was extremely uncomfortable with a human knowing I could read minds. I casually ran my fingers lightly over the side of my face.

_Good, I don't have much time, and if Bella finds out about this, I am worse than fired. I will be dead in a dumpster somewhere._

I grinned at his accurate interpretation of Bella's anger.

_Look, this is none of my business, but could you please tell me if you have feelings for Bella? Just touch your face again if you do, and you want to continue this conversation._

I took a moment to ponder what my next move should be. This very well could just be another trick. But then, there wasn't much more that I could lose at this point. Besides my family, Bella and C- CORP were all that mattered to me, and I had already lost those. There really wasn't much else he could take away from me.

I looked straight at him so as to leave no doubt in his mind. I bored into him with my stare as I leaned forward in my chair and put my hand up to the side of my face. He took a deep breath and swallowed as if he was gaining courage. His next words threw me.

_Bella loves you!_

I almost winced. His words were screaming in my ear.

_She is in love with you and from what I can see she has been in love with you for the last seven years. _

I was sitting up in my seat looking directly at him, not daring to believe what he had to say, but still urging him with my eyes to keep speaking.

_You really hurt her. She is terrified of getting close to you. She believes that after this is all over, that you plan on leaving. She is very certain that you do not love her and that you will leave her, just like before._

My body was tingling. It felt almost as if something was coursing through my veins again. I wanted to stand up and demand Simmons tell me everything. If fear of my leaving her was the only thing making Bella push me away, then this whole mess was over. I just wanted to find her and tell her everything. I was never so grateful for long winded Harry Banks. He was however, beginning his concluding remarks.

"_Bella will be at a party this Sunday night and you have an invitation. You are being given this one opportunity to talk to her, and work this out."_

Could this really be true? I was having a hard time putting my thoughts together. I looked straight at him and nodded a faint yes. He nodded back and continued.

"_I will have the invitation delivered, and Mr. Cullen, she went out with Thomas Vaughn because I tricked and coerced her. I thought it would help her, but nothing has. Before Thomas, the last guy she was with, well . . . was you."_

I could feel elation surge through me and Jasper spun in his chair to stare at me. I was faintly aware that Harry had finished his elongated dissertation. The meeting went on for an excruciating 30 more minutes. His mind gave me nothing else. Simmons adjourned the meeting and I bolted up to him straining to use human speed.

"Where is she? I quietly demanded. "I don't want to wait until Sunday to talk to her."

He stuttered and stammered and I could read perfectly where Bella was.

"She is already in Forks?" I said through barely disguised anger.

Simmons eyes widened. "Man, you're good," he muttered.

"Look," he said. His eyes were darting around the room looking for anyone who would see us talking and inform Bella. "She needs some time to be alone. This has all taken quite a toll on her."

A brief image of her sitting under her desk crying came to me. I winced at the scene.

"I need to see her _now_," I insisted.

He put out a hand to calm me down. "I know Bella pretty well, at least I thought I did until you came along. But she is pretty upset right now. So upset that she didn't care about missing this meeting today. That is definitely a first for her. If you follow her to Washington, she may just turn and run. Give her a few days to calm down. Trust me, she needs a break in the worst way." I started to protest and he put his hand out to stop me.

"She gets back Sunday afternoon. She will not miss this party."

The thought of her alone on that reservation with a pack of werewolves was eating away at my insides. But, what if I really did blow any chance of getting Bella back? Could I risk it? What if something happened to her? I laughed in scorn at myself. She had apparently done well enough keeping herself alive for seven years without my help. But the plane ride alone. . . with her luck, not even the black box would survive. It went against everything for me to leave her there. I would never let her get so far away from me again.

Finally I looked up at him. "Very well. I will be waiting for that invitation. Thank you."

He nodded his head and smiled. "You'll have the invitation before the end of the day."

I turned and walked to Jasper. A faint smile on my face. Bella loved me. She loved me.

"What is going on?" Jasper muttered under his breath.

I slapped him on the back and said brightly, "It looks like I'm going to another party."

He looked at me quizzically as we walked towards the elevators when I heard another message in my head.

"_Don't hurt her again. She'll never love anyone else."_

I turned around and squared my shoulders. Simmons was standing in the doorway to the conference room.

I walked back and said with complete conviction. "Don't worry. I won't make the same mistake twice. I love her more than anything. I always have." He nodded once and turned down another hallway.

Years ago, Bella had given me a gift.

When I became a vampire, I'd had no choice in the matter. I could have taken Carlisle's road, but I didn't. For 10 years I chose to be a monster. The images of what I did still haunt me, they always will. Even though I eventually found my way back to Carlisle and lived his life, I knew deep inside what I really was, the instincts I constantly fought against reminded me of that daily. But then one night in the tiny town of Forks a beautiful, trusting, innocent girl called my name in her sleep, and I was changed forever.

She saw something in me that I couldn't see. I was lost. And Bella found me.

When I said good-bye to Bella, she'd had no choice in the matter. It was all me, taking her destiny into my hands and changing it. Just like me, she had found a way to survive. To go on. I had killed and drank the blood of humans, all she had done was become a cut throat business woman. I saw who she really was. I knew what was inside her heart. I knew it's every beat and flutter. No one knew her heart better than I did.

So now, I would do all I could to save Bella, just as I was saved by her. I would tell Bella everything. I would leave absolutely no doubt in her mind how fiercely I loved and lived for her. And I would somehow convince her that I was not capable of ever leaving her again. I would then spend the rest of my days trying to make it up to her.

Bella and I for eternity. It was all I was fighting for now.

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**Oh Edward, I love you so much . . . . . . Please tell me what you think! 2 chapters and an epilogue left! See ya tomorrow!**


	14. FOOL

**Hey guys! I am sorry this is getting out late for a Friday night. Some of you may not even be able to read it until tomorrow. Thank you so much for what you said about Edward's POV. Your kind words are better than I deserve! Have a great Friday! Last chapter tomorrow! **

**See ya at the end! **

**Bella's POV**

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I was on my way to another party at the home of one of our firm's largest clients, Johnathan Chase. It was a birthday party being hosted by his wife. His estate in Hartford, Connecticut was large and grand. One of the most beautiful I'd ever seen. My driver headed silently away from the city lights. The snow was falling heavily and I could hear the slush under the tires. The drive that would normally be forty five minutes would be pushed closer to an hour with the weather. Unfortunately it was down time. There wasn't a lot of business I could accomplish using my phone on a Sunday night. I would have a lot of time to think. I closed my eyes and lay my head against the car window and let my mind weave back through the holiday.

Tuesday night when I got home from work, I was so unsettled. I had told Edward I was going to Forks. But, the more I thought about it, the more I was convinced it was a bad idea. It was selfish and wrong, but I couldn't do it. Not now, after what had happened. It seemed a little masochistic. I would spend all my time there in pain trying to act happy and not showing how much it hurt to see all the reminders of Edward. I didn't want to be someplace where I had to put on a mask. I was doing that enough already.

I really did miss Charlie. I hadn't seen him in over a year. I had flown him out to see me last summer and even though I tried to show him a good time, Charlie and the big city didn't get along very well. It was wrong of me to shut out the people in my life that loved me. I would have to make it up to him somehow.

I missed Jake terribly. But, there were also problems there. He was still the only member of the pack who hadn't found someone. I knew a part of me would be jealous when he did, but there was always an underlying current of tension when we were together. I knew how he felt about me, and he knew I couldn't accept. I wasn't sure I could handle Jake and everything that came with him. I had enough to deal with.

I was vacillating. It wasn't in my nature to be so indecisive. All I knew, was that I couldn't stay in my apartment all weekend, and I couldn't go to Florida or Forks. Other than that, I had no idea what I should do. Then it hit me. I called Mr. Hathaway. The firm had a cabin on a 50 acre estate in Montana. Mr. Hathaway had mentioned it to me a few times and suggested that I stay a weekend. I couldn't imagine that it wasn't being used on Thanksgiving.

When I called him, he was pleased I wanted to use it. He had his secretary call me and amazingly enough, none of the associates were staying there. She was very efficient. I told her I wanted the next flight out, and she booked me on a plane leaving at 2:10 a.m. Then, she arranged for a car to pick me up in Helena,Montana.She asked if I wanted a staff there to prepare my meals and take care of all my needs. I flinched and said no. I was perfectly capable of heating my own frozen pizza.

Around noon the next day, the car pulled up in front of the cabin. It was beautiful. And huge. I wondered if I would even get the chance to explore it all in the four days I would be there. I carried in my one bag and stood in awe at the massive great room. I also didn't feel alone. There were dead animals mounted on every wall staring at me.

The kitchen was fully stocked. I was told there would be a car, although I didn't foresee me having to leave this place for any reason. I went to the garage and when I saw it, I knew it was a vehicle that Simmons would appreciate. It was black and sleek and I had no idea what it was. I walked around to the back and saw theJaguar emblem with a XJ next to it.

I came back in and plopped down on one of the many couches and let out a sigh. This was a good thing. It was a chance for me to just be Bella. I didn't have to worry about walls, or fortresses. I didn't have to think about looming shareholder meetings, final drafts, or corporate budgets. And I didn't have to think about seeing a stunningly beautiful angel with a guilt complex.

I _didn't_ have to think about him, but I did anyway. I checked my watch and saw that the meeting would have been over at least an hour ago. I called Simmons and I made him go over every last detail with me. I even grilled him on a few points and he had all the right answers. From what I could surmise, the meeting had gone very well. So well, in fact, that Monday was the last time Edward and Jasper would be there. My throat was all of the sudden too small for me to swallow. One more time. Just one more day in that conference room and he would be gone.

I got off the phone and reminded myself that it was a good thing. I was the one that had made this happen. I had hastened the process to get him out of my life sooner and definitely succeeded. I halfway wished I wasn't so good at my job.

I took a deep breath. I still had one more call to make. This one would be no fun. I had to tell Jake that I wouldn't be there for Thanksgiving. I had never actually given him an answer one way or another, but I was sure he thought I was coming.

When I heard his voice again, I felt that painful tug at my heart. How easy would life be if I loved Jacob Black? This human thing would have been a breeze. I steeled myself and broke the bad news.

"Jake, I can't come to Forks."

He sighed hard. "Can't or _won't_?" He said in a frustrated voice.

"Jake, I just can't come home this time, maybe next year."

"What about Christmas?" Christmas. I had forgotten about Christmas.

"Um, I'll have to see about that, Jake. There is so much going on right now."

"Charlie is going to be very disappointed," he said softly.

"Jake, I am so sorry."

"So, are you spending Thanksgiving with Thomas Vaughn?"

I was so stunned for a moment that I couldn't say anything. "What?" I finally got out.

"We get magazines way out here in LaPush too, Bella. You and this football player seem pretty serious." There was more hurt than anger in his voice.

"Jake, that is all a bunch of lies. Thomas and I are not getting marr . . ."

"Bella," he interrupted me. "I always thought that you were still in love with that damn leech and that was the only thing keeping you from being with me. Now I am starting to realize that it had nothing to do with that." I recognized the sound in his voice and knew he was shaking.

"Jake, I am not with Thomas for Thanksgiving. I am not marrying him."

"But you're dating him. I thought you weren't dating in New York. If you are, then eventually you're going to get serious with someone. Please, give me a chance. Bella, I love you. Please come home." The way he said "home" broke my heart.

"I am no good for anyone, Jake."

"Come home and I'll take care of you. Bella, I want to marry you and love you for the rest of our natural lives." He put stronger emphasis on the word natural.

I tried humor. "Oh yeah? Well, what will happen to me when we have three kids and one on the way and you suddenly imprint on some gorgeous young werewolf?"

His voice showed no trace of humor. "That would never happen. I will never see anyone but you. I am in love with _you_, Bella."

I felt the tears in the corners of my eyes as I whispered roughly, "You deserve more than to be anyone's second choice, Jake."

"I'll take it," he said quickly and decisively.

I shook my head sadly. "For me, it would be half a life. I would soon doom you to the same fate."

I could tell he was up and pacing. "You say that, but I know that in time you would love me just as much as I love you."

"I don't love you that way, Jake."

"Yes you do, you just don't know it. You have always let that stupid leech's memory come between us."

It was barely a whisper when I spoke. "He's here, Jake. My firm is trying to buy his company. I have been in meetings with him since the first of October." A few tears fell out the corner of my eyes.

"That damn parasite is there with you in New York!" I could almost see the ripples traveling down his arms. I could hear his breathing coming low and shallow.

"He'll be gone in a couple of days." I managed to say. "Jake, I . . . I am so sorry. Please tell Charlie I'm sorry. I just couldn't come home right now."

"Bella." His voice was a low growl. He sounded so hurt. "Don't you fall for anything he has to say. Do not go back to him."

"Don't worry," I scoffed. "There's no chance of that."

In a softer voice he said, "Bella, you don't sound very good. I'm worried about you. Please come home."

"Bye, Jake. I'll talk to you soon." I hung up the phone. Well, that went well, I thought. I shook my head in disgust at myself. If I could just choose who my heart was to love this would be so much easier.

The weekend was good and quiet. There was a vast library with a limited edition copy of Pride and Prejudice. I spent a lot of time in front of the massive fireplace reading. There was also a huge movie collection. I watched a few of the ones I heard people around the office talking about over the years.

Mostly, I thought about Edward. I decided I wanted us to have a nice good-bye when he left on Monday. If he wasn't too angry with me, I wanted to make sure that we parted on good terms. The last memory of his leaving had haunted me for too long. I wanted this to be something I could look at years from now and remember fondly. I could fall apart later, when he wasn't around. Then, I would get back to business as usual.

I also knew that things with Thomas had to end immediately. I had to let him go find who he was really supposed to be with. It wasn't me.

It was good to get away. On neutral territory I was able to see things from a different perspective. It had been a good break.

As the plane came in for a landing, I could see the skyline. I took a deep breath. I was ready for the future. When news of my promotion at Berkshire-Hathaway became public, I was going to be busier than I had ever been. I would be traveling around the world and living a life I could scarcely even conceive. I would have all the money I would ever need, and then some. I would have the cars, and the private jets. I would have the yachts and the parties. This was what many people dreamed of getting their whole lives.

I lay my head back against the seat and bit my lip. I never wanted it. All the things that were being handed to me I never cared about. If I could have my vampire and live somewhere in a tiny house miles and miles from anywhere, I would trade it all. In a heartbeat.

When I got in the taxi, I checked my messages. Vaughn had called me. No time like the present to get this over with. I called him and flinched at how happy he sounded at my return. He met me at my building and gathered me up in a huge hug and then he put his face in my hair and told me how much he had missed me. I really was a monster. A stupid, can't seem to love the great guys who want you and won't leave you, kind of monster.

"How was Thanksgiving with your dad?" He asked.

Here it comes, I thought. "I didn't go to Forks. I ended going to the Firm's cabin in Montana."

He blinked at the surprise and his face fell. "You would rather go to a cabin alone instead of spending Thanksgiving with me?"

"I needed some time alone. I had a lot of thinking to do." I stared at him and tried one more time to fall in love with him. No luck.

"Thinking." He swallowed hard. "That's usually a bad sign if you're so unsure about something that you have to travel halfway across the country to think about it."

I sighed hard and looked in his eyes. "Vaughn, I don't need five dates to know how I feel." I shook my head sadly and he slowly closed his eyes and dropped his head.

"I'm so sorry," I whispered.

He looked up and put his hands gently on my shoulders. "Bella, is this because of that stupid article? Look, I know we haven't talked about children, but I do not expect you to leave your career and start having kids right away. Your career is one of the things I love about you." He was shaking his head now. "Don't throw this away, Bella. We are great together. I am in love with you and if you need more time to be sure, then you've got it. I don't need a decision after five dates."

I put my hand on his cheek. "You are far better than I deserve. And you deserve somebody who is capable of falling head over heels in love with you." I shook my head sadly. "That girl isn't me, Vaughn. It will never be me."

He backed up a few steps and his hand ran through his hair as he said, "This is about Edward Cullen, isn't it?"

I stuttered and stammered as he came closer to me again. "I was furious at the way he danced with you at the Governor's Ball, but I believed you when you said you were over him." He put his hands on each side of my face. "Are you back with him? Did he tell you he loves you and that he wants a future with you?"

"No," I said painfully.

"That's right, and he won't either. If he cared as much as I do, he would be here right now fighting for you just like I am. I am offering you everything he won't give you, Bella. Please don't tell me it's over."

I moved my face out of his hands and said, "It's over, good-bye Vaughn."

I turned and headed for the elevator. I hit the button and when I looked back, he was gone.

In one week, I had tricked Edward out of his company, backed out of Thanksgiving with Jake and told him I didn't love him, and dumped Thomas Vaughn, the Sexiest Bachelor Alive. The day was still young, I was sure there was a kid I could push off a bike, or puppies I could drown. There had to be a special place for people like me.

The car hit a pothole and slowed. It drew me out of my daze. I realized we were turning down the long drive to the Chase Estate. I checked my watch and realized we had been driving for almost an hour. I had been completely lost in my own world.

My driver dropped me off in the large circular driveway and I gave him instructions to return at 9:30 p.m. I took a breath before ringing the doorbell. I was back to reality.

I was actually slightly looking forward to this party. I was close with Johnathan Chase. He had been one of my first clients when I was hired with the firm, and we had hit it off. He said he could tell I had potential. He had been patient as I made mistakes, and then gave me all the praise as I made his company a lot of money once I gained confidence in myself.

It was a very fancy affair. I was wearing a gown that was dark purple satin with a halter top, bare back, and tight at the waist. It glided down to the floor and shimmered as I walked. I wore my hair up and let a few curls fall down here and there.

I walked in and was greeted and sent into the living room where we would talk before dinner. There was a band playing soft jazz and the lights were turned down low. I saw some business associates in the far corner and made my way there. Apparently, talk had reached their ears about the buy-out of C-CORP. They were intrigued at the money involved and I tried to stay tightlipped and guided the topic in other directions. I had already committed to myself that I would not think of Edward that night.

The party moved into the dining room and to my disappointment, I was placed between two men that had in the past been less than subtle about their intentions with me. I cringed and sat down and tried to pay attention to the conversation going on across the table.

The guy on my left was a stockbroker and was apparently as aggressive off the stock exchange floor as he was on it. Three times during dinner he put his hand on my thigh, and every time I would swat it away.

The man on my right, was a lawyer for an investment client of mine and every time he knew I was in the office he would find some reason to be involved in the meeting. He was awkward in the way he flirted with me and it just made me uncomfortable. He asked me out every time he saw me, and I was running out of reasons why I couldn't go out with him.

I spent the meal swatting away "the hand" on my left, and politely grinning at goofy jokes on my right. I was beyond relieved when the dinner ended and the party was shifted to the inside pool area for presents, cake, and dancing.

The pool was covered in floating candles and there were large balloons and lights hanging from the glass ceiling. Light snowflakes fell onto the cold glass and clung there.

The band from before had moved into the room and was softly playing and I shrank back against the wall. As lovely as it all was, I did not want to dance. It was 9:00 and I went looking for Johnathan Chase. Before I went home, I wanted to wish him a happy birthday, make sure he had received my gift, and thank him for the invitation when "the hand" came over and put his arm around my waist and without asking, started guiding me to the dance floor. I planted my feet and started pulling away from him when another stronger hand yanked the arm away and a velvet voice said, "I don't think she wants to dance with you."

I turned my head and there he was, looking unbearably exquisite in his tuxedo. He touched my elbow gently and began leading me to the dance floor as he turned around to "the hand" and said softly, "And if you ever lay a hand on her again without her permission, I'll break it."

Edward gracefully backed onto the dance floor and pulled me to him.

"Hi," he said.

"Hi," I breathed back.

I could feel the chill of his body through his tux and smell his scent swirling all around me as he breathed inches from my face. He took my right hand and held it in his own. He then placed his other hand on my bare back and I inhaled with surprise at the ice-cold touch. He didn't move his hand. He just let his fingers gradually lower to the small of my back where my dress kept me from feeling the direct chill, and pulled me tighter to him.

He slowly began swaying to the music as he murmured into my ear, "Did you have a nice Thanksgiving?"

I nodded my head.

I was using all my concentration to keep my weak knees under me. I was going crazy inside. Every sense was on alert. I was tingling, I felt electric.

I searched for a topic of conversation, anything to keep me from falling deeper into his spell. "I wasn't aware that you knew Johnathan Chase," I said.

"Who?" he asked.

"The host of the party," I said breathlessly. "We are celebrating his birthday tonight."

"Oh sure," Edward said confidently, "Johnathan and I go way back."

I looked at him skeptically. "I find that interesting."

"Why is that?" he asked innocently.

I was beginning to find my voice again. "Because Johnathan Chase used to be a surgeon, then he moved to research. His company specializes in red and white blood cell exploration. He is the top blood researcher in the country."

Edward's eyes blazed with surprise for a moment and then he grinned, "I can see why you would find that interesting."

He chuckled then and said, "Okay, you got me. I'm crashing this party with the sole intention of talking to you." His face grew serious.

I found it impossible to breathe or swallow. I knew I couldn't do this again. I was painfully aware of my limitations. "Edward, we talked about this."

He took my hand and led me into a far corner of the dance floor. He opened the door to a small room used for pool supplies. It was dark, and we were all alone. I was not going in there with him. I pulled at my hand, but he held it fast. I tried to back up, but he grabbed me around the back and pulled me in. There was just enough light from a vent above the door to see his face and I saw his eyes shine brilliantly in the darkness as he shut the door and said, "No, Bella. You said you set me free. I never agreed to it, and I never will. You're going to listen to me for a change." His hands came softly on each side of my face.

"There are some things you need to know." His velvet voice was warm and resolute. "Bella, you said I never looked for you, but I did come back. Three years after I left, I went back to Forks to see you." I saw his eyes pull tight. "I read the note you left for me."

My head was spinning. He came back? I would have been twenty-one and working like mad on my Masters.

"Charlie never told me . . ." My voice trailed off.

He looked down at me gently. "After I read your note, I asked him not to tell you I was there." He smirked in derision. "He was only too happy to comply."

I was in shock that he had actually come back on his own. I thought of all those nights I had laid awake staring at my window hoping in vain that he would return.

Still, three years? Why had it taken three years? And _why_ did he come back? Guilt again?

As if he could read my mind, he dropped his hands to my waist and pulled me to him and said very quickly, "For the first few months after I left, I tracked Victoria and somehow ended up in the slums of Brazil trying to first, make it day to day, then hour to hour, then minute to minute without you."

His breathing was heavy by my ear and I felt myself grip tight to his arms. He missed me? He was _trying to stay away_? . . Then it hit me, and my heart sunk as I remembered him saying I wasn't good for him. That's why he fought the urge and apparently won for three whole years.

Panic hit me. He would leave again. I hadn't been then, and certainly wasn't now, enough to keep him. Our spheres were still nowhere close to touching. He was with me tonight, but at some point in the future I would wake up alone. What would a seventeen year old exquisite piece of perfection want with a clumsy, twenty five year old human? I had to keep up my protection. I had to put up the wall to keep from dying inside.

I tried to pull away, but his iron grip held me fast. The tears were pooling in my eyes. His lips moved on my ear as he said, "Bella, I love you. I have always loved you."

He loved me? My fingers tightened on his arms as I let those words sink in. His eyes never wavered as they looked intently into mine. I shook my head in disbelief and felt the tears falling down my face as I said, "You never would have left if you loved me _half_ as much as I loved you."

He looked directly into my eyes, and spoke slowly, "It was the biggest mistake I've ever made, I see that now. But, you were in constant danger from my existence. I had to put your needs before my own. I had to leave and give you the chance at a real life."

I was choking on my emotion. I clenched my teeth and growled, "I had a real life, with you." I bit my lip and swallowed down the tears.

His teeth were clenched with a yearning to make me understand. "It wasn't a real life, it was dangerous and selfish on my part to keep you. I wanted you to have the real life you would have had if you never met me."

"How do you like my real life?" I asked angrily. "How dare you make that decision on your own! How could you make such a huge decision about _my_ life without me and leave me thinking that for the last seven years you didn't love me?"

I tried again to pull away. He moved his hands back up to my face and his eyes softened.

"Bella," he whispered gently. "If you want to leave after I'm finished explaining myself I will let you go, but not until I am done. I realize this is my only chance. You have made it impossible for me to speak to you any other way."

His thumbs moved back and forth on my face as he purred, "Bella, I have loved you every moment of everyday. I have been in Ireland trying to figure out how to be part of my family again. Ever since I left you it has been very difficult for me to be around them, to have any sort of purpose or direction."

He gripped me almost desperately and whispered harshly, "I had made peace with myself that you were happy and living life as you would have before I met you. I imagined you happy and that you had forgotten all about me." He grit his teeth and growled. "Then when I saw you at the top of those stairs with that Thomas character. . ."

His fingers twitched and tightened reflexively on my face. "I knew I wanted you to only be with me. To belong to me, and _no one else_. This time without you has been unbearable, desolate even. I need you and the light you bring into my life."

His nose brushed mine and his lips were so close to me as I muttered, "Edward, I can't do this. You say you left to protect me, but none of that has changed. You seemed pretty sure of your decision the first time." I swallowed hard. "At some point you will leave again." My voice caught as I whispered, "I won't survive the next time."

He growled slightly and his forehead rested on mine as he said, "Bella, I will never leave you again. I give you my solemn vow. I can't bear to be away from you. I follow you every morning on your run and I have followed you on every date you've had with Thomas. I watch your light go out at night and I sit and stare at your window." A sob came out as he said, "I even flew to Forks to make sure you were all right and try to talk to you."

"You went to Forks?" I whispered. I was grasping so tightly to him. Could these things he was saying actually be true? Could he really feel this way? If he really loved me all this time, hope was going to start to creep back into my heart. I was so afraid of feeling hope again.

"You weren't there," he said painfully. "I had no idea where you were. I went to the airport and waited all day until I saw that you made it back safely."

His hand went into my hair. "Bella, I can't survive unless I am close to you. I need you beside me, close beside me. I want you more than I'll ever want anything." His hands were back on my face again. "I love you, Bella. I never stopped. I never will.

I heard his voice catch as he said, "You are accomplished, and intelligent and you've far outgrown me in every way. Ever since I saw you at the top of those stairs, I have wanted you . . .so much, but I have tried to stay away from you. I can't imagine what you would possibly see in me now. I'm not worthy of any of the heartache and sacrifice it would take to be with me, but it is too much for me to have you go the rest of your life believing I don't love you, that I didn't love you then. You will always be the most important part of my life."

He finished his speech and I stood there motionless. It was as if he had been describing how I felt about _him_. In my heart, the last seven years didn't matter. All I wanted was to hold on to him and never let him go.

Edward loved me, and I was found.

I felt his cold hand travel to my chin and he pulled my face up to his. "Oh, Bella," he whispered hoarsely. "Is there any chance that you could still care for me, that you could love me?"

So many words were fighting to make their way out, my arms didn't stop until they were encased around his neck. My hands went into his hair as I pulled my face up to his and I felt my lips brush against his as I somehow found the voice to whisper, "Yes Edward, I love you, I'll never stop loving you."

All the air went out of him as his lips pushed hard against mine. His hands tightened on my face as he whispered my name and kissed me harder. My heart exploded. I was completely over taken by desire and longing for the love of my life. My fingers wound tight in his hair as our lips moved hard against each other, pushing and holding as we struggled to get as close to each other as possible. There were no rules. No matter what I did, he never stopped me. He had never kissed me this way. Over and over, his lips pushed hard against mine, and I had to pull away, gasping for air, before I could start kissing him again.

His lips parted and I stood motionless as his ice cold tongue ran across my lips. He then held my head steady as his tongue found its way into my mouth and lingered for an indescribable moment. When I sighed, he moved forward and backed me up against the wall and held himself tight against me. His hands traveled down to my sides. His fingers tightened around me as they traveled down to my hips and then back up to my face again. He grabbed my hands and held them above my head and I let out a cry as his mouth left my lips and traveled down to my neck. He kissed every inch of my neck and collarbone and then moved his lips back and forth along my jaw. His very talented lips then found their way to my ear and he murmured, "Please, let's leave this party. Let's go somewhere we can be alone."

I let go of his hands and my fingers moved to his face as I breathed out, "My place."

"Perfect." His inhumanly delicious breath intoxicated me.

My hands wound still farther into his hair, holding him as close to me as I could. I was breathing so hard and swallowing air. I was never this out of breath even after I had been running.

His fingers moved up and down my spine on my bare back and my breath caught and held in my throat. He then grasped onto my dress as he pressed me tight against him. He kissed my bare shoulder. Then his lips were lightly touching mine as he whispered, "Let's leave _now_."

His lips were still brushing over mine as I whispered, "I need to tell Johnathan good-bye. I need to thank him for the evening."

He kissed me in a way that should be illegal, and then his eyes found mine. as he said softly, "I'll wait for you by the side entrance. I brought my own car."

Somehow, I tore myself away from him. It wasn't until I turned away and walked out the door that I heard the music and the loud conversations. I had been in such a trance that only Edward had existed for me. My legs were shaky as I hurriedly made my way through the crowd looking for Johnathan.

I found him near the bar and thanked him for the gracious invitation to his lovely party and as quickly as I could without seeming obvious, I grabbed my coat and purse and made my way to the side entrance.

The crowds were thick and many stopped to make conversation with me. I smiled and kept walking, apologizing for my having to leave. The music was loud as I passed the dance floor and began weaving through the people coming ever closer to the paradise of that side entrance.

I was halfway across the pool room when Steven Maxwell, the head lawyer for the company I had acquired back in September, approached me. There was a strong smell of liquor on his breath.

"Well, hello there, Ms. Swan," he said with a bit of contempt.

I was impatient. I just wanted to get to Edward. I was trying to push past him as I said flatly, "Hello Steven."

After I had beaten him in the conference room, he had called me and asked me out. My refusal at his advances seemed to make him angrier than taking his client's company.

He raised the side of his mouth maliciously and said, "That was a tactic I had never thought of myself, but I must admit, that given the chance I would gladly give it a try".

"What are you talking about?" My voice was raised to be heard over the music.

"The word is out that that was the guy from C- CORP that you were hot and heavy with in the shadows over there. You are about to take over his company and he is invoking a strategy that appeared to be working." He sneered as he said, "Can't really ruin a guy's life if you're involved with him now, can you?" He got closer in my face and said, "Word on the street is that they were planning to invoke one last ditch strategy to stop the sale. I guess this was it. Looks like he'll be keeping his company after all. He plays as dirty as you, Isabella."

I backed away from him. My insides froze as my eyes widened at the shock. It couldn't be . . . but it had to be.

Of course. My middle was on fire.

I was an utter fool.

Edward was doing all of this in a final effort to save C- CORP. It was just like any other time he used his "gifts" to lure in the prey. And I deserved it. After all the things I had put him through, he had finally found the ultimate trick to play on me. Had this been his plan from the beginning? How could I be so stupid? I felt it all slipping though my fingers.

I backed away from Steven. My jaw was clenched painfully and I could feel the panic, horror, and embarrassment rising and incapacitating me. I looked at my watch and had to blink furiously to see that it was 9:40. My driver would be waiting for me at the front entrance. I pushed through the people and ran towards the dining room. If Edward heard that conversation, he would be right behind me.

Once I hit the carpet, my heel caught in the heavy loops and I fell. I was back in the forest again. Stumbling. The only world I ever wanted was again taken from me as the hole grew and spread, much larger than it had ever been before. I picked myself up and stumbled towards the front door. The snow was swirling around me as I reached the entrance, but my coat hung limply at my side. The car pulled up the circular drive and as my driver came around to open my door, I stumbled in and fell limp on the seat.

The tears threatened. I angrily wiped them away. There was no time for such ridiculous, weak things. I was done with all of this. I had a job to do.

What a complete fool I had been.

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**Bella, wait! NO! You are such a fool! Tomorrow is the last chapter guys! I appreciate you hanging in there. It all comes together tomorrow, JUST WAIT!!! Love you all . . .**


	15. LOST

**Hello everyone. Here we are. I want to thank you for your reviews of the last chapter. Some of you talked about the fact that Bella's habit of storming off was becoming a bit repetitious. I agree. I hope that it didn't turn you off, and that you stuck around to see how it all turns out. I had written the last chapter back in August, and then filled in some things in the middle. I think I kinda lost my perspective about Bella and her leaving. If I had Stephenie's Meyer's editor, she would catch things like that and tell me to fix them, wouldn't she????**

**Okay, It is breaking my heart to let you all go. Your reviews have made it easy for me to get up at 5:00 in the morning so I can read through the next chapters and make small changes and try to make it just a little bit better for you. I haven't gone running since I started posting this story. I haven't been able to pull myself away from the computer until it is time to get ready for school. I probably won't even be able to run 2 miles, but it will have been worth it. Your reviews have been beyond anything I could have expected. **

**Thank you for your confessions of tears, your reviews put into rhyme and song, and your occasional rant. I will read them often. Especially if I have had a bad day. **

**Really quick, This chapter will have the song that started this story for me. It is LOST by Michael Buble'. Some of you have downloaded his songs. This is the best, in my opinion. I heard it at the concert that night, and the whole story just started laying out in front of me.**

**There is reference to a brand of shoes called Manolo Blahniks. They are by a Spanish designer and they range in price from $500 - $1,000 and up. They are beautiful! Google it if you want to see them, and click on Fall Collection to see what kind of shoes Bella has been wearing! **

**See ya at the end!**

**- - - - - - - - - - - - - **

(BELLA'S POV)

"Driver, I want you go as fast as you dare." He began to protest, then he turned back for a moment and saw my face. The next thing I knew, his foot was pushing down on the gas and we were speeding to the road. The hole screamed for attention and I ingored it. I was not giving in this time. I set my jaw and forced myself to stay angry. That was a better place fo rme to be. As we pulled on to the freeway, I realized I couldn't go home. He would find me. The only thing I knew was that If he would go so far as to pretend to love me, he was capable of anything. Slowly, I began to formulate a plan. By the time the city skyline came into view, I knew what had to happen.

I looked at my watch. It was just past 10:00, not much time. I called my personal lawyer, and informed him I needed to speak to him immediately. We would be up all night formulating a strategy to keep me from getting sued by my own company. What I had planned for tomorrow would make Sterling Hathaway furious.

I met my lawyer at his office, and I informed him of what I wanted to do. First, he looked at me like I was crazy. I was standing there in my evening dress at midnight asking him to do something that was unheard of in the business world. After I reassured him that I had not had even one swallow of liquor, he finally gave in. He was not so subtle as he reminded me he got paid double for working in the a.m. hours. It was a good thing that he was the best there was.

We stayed up all night drafting the necessary documents. We worked feverishly trying to accomplish what should easily take a week. Finally, at around 6:30 a.m., he was putting in the finishing touches. I read over everything and signed my name in all the necessary places. I thought about what I held in my hands. For one moment I let myself feel sorrow. Then I stopped. Emotions were what had got me into so much trouble in the first place. If I had just stayed heartless and unfeeling throughout this whole mess with Edward, none of this would have happended. It was a lesson learned. I wouldn't make the same mistake again. I grabbed the entire stack of papers, and headed to the office.

As we inched our way through the morning downtown traffic, I turned my cell phone back on. I had turned it off as I came back into the city last night. I had no idea if Edward had my cell phone number. No sense taking any chances. I called Simmons.

"Hey, Bella . . . . uh, did anything good happen to you this weekend?"

That was a stupid question to ask. I furrowed my brow and barked, "The weekend was fine. Is everyone in the room?"

There was a slight pause and then he said hesitantly, "Everyone but Edward."

"I'll be there in five minutes." I hung up before he had time to say anything else.

My mind was racing as I tried to figure out what Edward would do next. It was not an easy feat to determine the brilliant mind of a vampire, but I was sure there was no way Edward was going to let me get past the lobby. I could try to sneak around to another entrance, but I decided it was best to meet this head on.

The car hadn't even pulled up to the curb when I saw him. He was more beautiful than anything I would ever see again in my whole life. Like some forgotten pagan god of beauty. His hair was slightly blowing in the December wind. Everyone was hunched against the cold, but he was oblivious. His face was dark as he stood against the building staring straight at my window.

"Yeah, I bet you're a little angry right now, aren't ya!" I mumbled out the window. "Your diabolical little plan didn't work out quite the way you expected, did it?"

The taxi driver looked back at me strangely and I threw the fare at him and got out. I hastily climbed to the curb and put my head down, walking quickly to the revolving doors. His velvet voice was beside me.

"Bella, it's not what you think."

I was almost running now. "Last time I checked, you couldn't tell what I was thinking," I barked.

"Bella, what happens between us has nothing to do with the damn company." His velvet voice actually sounded genuine.

I dove into the revolving doors. He was right behind me, but then a woman jumped in with me and looked at him as if she expected him to be a gentlemen and let her in. He walked into the next slot and at that moment, coming from inside the building, an older man with a cane slowly began making his way around. Edward was stuck in between and having to go the same pace as the old man. I jumped out and ran through the lobby and crammed myself into an elevator that was just closing. I ignored the strange looks I got from my choice of business attire.

My heart was pealing madly, and it made me angry how my body would betray my head. _He doesn't love you, Bella_. I reminded myself again_. One more time, I kept thinking. Just one more time._

When the elevator doors slid open on the 42nd floor, he was standing there with his hands on his hips waiting for me.

_The cheater took the stairs_, I steamed. I began walking swiftly, for a human, to the conference room. It was a little hard in the evening gown. The stupid shoes weren't helping matters.

"Bella, how could you believe that I was just trying to get my company back last night? You know me better me than that, don't you?" His voice was still velvet, but his teeth were clenched and he was talking so only I could hear him.

"Bella, every word I said last night was absolutely true, you must believe me."

We had reached the conference room doors. I slowed my pace and stopped. I turned and looked directly into his eyes as I breathed out, "I am not that eighteen year old girl you left in the forest Edward. She loved you without reason, she would have gone to the ends of the earth with you. She offered you her soul and asked for nothing but your love in return. You have no idea what it did to that girl when you left."

"I think I'm beginning to see," he whispered.

I swallowed hard and looked down as I reached for the doorknob. His voice was behind me on my neck as he pleaded, "Bella, don't do this, don't go in that room. You love me, and I love you, completely. Just stay here with me. There is nothing I wouldn't do for you. I don't care about the company, Bella. I don't care."

This was the last time Edward would ever be this close to me. I closed my eyes and breathed in the moment, then I swallowed hard and cleared my throat as I turned the doorknob and walked in. I heard him catch the door behind me with a heavy sigh and walk in and bleakly take his seat.

As I neared the table, Simmons stared at my clothes. "You're a little over dressed aren't you?" He raised an eyebrow at me and I ignored him. I opened my briefcase and looked at the papers my lawyer and I had signed just hours before. This was it. The room quieted, and I began.

"Gentlemen, I want to thank you all for being here today in what is likely to be our last meeting."

The firm's lawyers looked smug. They knew nothing of what transpired last night. Mr. Banks, and the rest of C- CORP'S lawyers looked haggard. I looked at Mr. Banks a little closer, and realized that he looked especially tired and worn. If I didn't know better, I would have sworn that he was up all last night too. Well, I thought with chagrin, he will sleep well tonight.

I looked at the secretary in charge of all the minutes of the meeting as I said, "I want it stated for the record that in what I am about to say, I am acting completely on my own. No other member of this firm is involved in my actions."

Simmons moved to the edge of his seat with a most distressed and perplexed look on his face. I continued.

"As of 10:00 a.m. this morning, December 2nd, I am terminating all designs on C- CORP."

Simmons came bolting out of his chair. The firm's lawyers looked stunned. They began raising their voices and shouting questions at me. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Jasper shoot a look at Edward. I purposely would not look at either of them. I put out my hand to stop the noise.

"I have drafted a series of documents that will need to be signed by both parties. The major points are outlined, but I will state that as of 5:00 this evening the 51 of C- CORP'S shares currently owned by this firm will again be on the market." Jasper turned quickly to a lawyer sitting at the end of the table. The lawyer was already standing and racing out of the room with his cell phone in his hand.

I gestured to the very large stack of papers in front of me and said, "You will all be busy signing and reading documents for the next few hours. You won't need me, I have taken the liberty of signing my name on the appropriate lines already."

"That's it?" Harry Banks breathed out.

"That's it." I said with finality.

I was closing my briefcase and preparing to leave when Harry, who seemed quite stunned, said, "I may need to contact you in the next few days, would you like me to come here, or have you come to my office?"

I took another deep breath, "If you need to contact me after today, you must call Michael Simmons who will then know how to find me." I swallowed hard and said, "You will not be able to reach me here. As of today, I will no longer be working at Berkshire-Hathaway, because I am resigning."

Simmons put his head in his hands as the room filled with whispers and shocked faces. Edward shot out of his chair and through his clenched jaw said, "No, Bella."

I felt the tears coming to my eyes and I defiantly blinked them away. I was determined to make my last exit as grand as my entrances had been.

I held my briefcase in my hand and I backed away from the table as I said, "There is a Cinderella clause on these documents. If they are not filed with a notary by 10:00 a.m., all ownership rights on the company revert back to this firm. I have left you barely enough time to do this. I suggest you get started. Good day, gentlemen."

There was a flurry of activity. The papers were grabbed by Harry's team and they began thumbing through to see if this was really legitimate. My team was stunned and trying to get a look at the papers too. Not one of them looked at me. I knew I was replaceable. There would be a new headhunter doing my job by the end of the week.

I was still facing the group, with my back to the door when I couldn't stop myself from looking at him one more time. I just had to see his angel face to make sure I would never forget. My eyes traveled slowly across the group until they had the courage to look at him. He was staring at me. I felt my legs go weak and I dug my hands into my palms. His angular face was troubled. I couldn't see why, I had given him everything he wanted. I took a deep breath and thought that despite everything, I was so glad he had kissed me last night. I would have taken any amount of pain to have it.

I swallowed down the emotion and whispered, "Bye." Even with all the commotion I knew he would hear me.

He started emphatically shaking his head and rising out of his seat and I clenched my teeth and started backing towards the door as I whispered, "Clean break."

I nodded my head as if to show I was going to be okay. I did not want him following me. And then I turned and began walking quickly out the door.

As I left the room, I heard Mr. Banks say, "Mr. Cullen, get back here, yours will be our most important signature. We don't have much time."

Then I heard Jasper's voice. "Edward, you have to do this for Carlisle."

The door hadn't even swung shut when Simmons was there.

"Bella, what the hell is going on? You can't quit!" He had caught up to me and said quietly, "What could happen to make you do such a crazy thing? Did something happen with Edward?"

I was still walking fast. I wanted to get my personal things from the office before the word got out. I needed Mr. Hathaway to hear the news from me.

My voice broke a little as I said, "Apparently, I am not as cutthroat and devious as I once thought." I laughed with derision. "It appears that Edward holds that title."

"What did he do, Bella?" He sounded angry now.

"It doesn't matter anymore," I was at my office and my secretary Sally was attempting to give me the schedule for the day. She stared down at my clothes. I ignored her. I went into one of my many closets and pulled out a box and began putting in my pictures of Renee, Charlie and Jake, and a few other things that were important to me. I left all the awards that had gathered on my shelves.

"Bella, is that the dress you wore to the Chase party last night? Did you even go home? Just tell me what happened?"

He was standing in my doorway looking desperate and confused. I looked on my desk and took my book of all the contacts that I had made over the years. There was a chance those names might come in handy later.

Without looking back, I began walking out of the office. I tried to push past Simmons, but he stopped me. "Bella, you are the best there is. Please don't do this. It can still be fixed."

I hadn't planned on feeling relief at the thought of leaving this place. I thought that all of this was a representation of what I wanted after he left me, but maybe it was just part of my defense to keep everyone away. To stop feeling.

I turned to look at him and my face was actually calm. "Look, you probably already know this, but you are my best friend. The only friend I have had in a long while." I smiled a little. "Thank you for everything, especially lately." I cleared my throat and said, "Right now. I need one last favor, I need you to go back in that conference room and see that everything goes all right. The last thing I need is to have to see him, again."

I swallowed hard as I looked down. Through a big lump in my throat I said, "Call me later and let me know how it went, okay?"

He gave me a big hug and said, "I'll call you in a couple of hours."

I nodded my head and walked away. Mr. Hathaway wasn't in his office. He was in a meeting. Good. I wasn't sure how I could have done it right now anyway. Chances were the news would get to him before I did, but it didn't really matter now.

I hailed a cab and breathed a sigh of relief. I had done it. I had been tough. I had kept it together this one last time. I dropped the box off in my apartment, showered and changed into more appropriate clothing, and then went back downstairs. I didn't think I had the energy to run right now, so I decided to go for a walk instead. I headed across the street and started down the main path through Central Park. My feet were crunching on the thick layer of snow on the ground. It was very quiet. There was hardly anyone in the park, and I walked slowly, concentrating on my steps, and thinking back on the events of the last twenty four hours.

I had admitted to Edward last night that I loved him. I had once again opened myself up, making myself vulnerable to him and had my heart broken. I made a vow that I would never fall in love with a vampire again.

He was my whole world. Even though he hadn't been a part of it for seven years, he was still my reason for everything. He was the beginning and end of every day. I thought I had found something so real, that it felt like our souls touched every time I was near him. I wasn't sure I was made to get over that.

I would love him for the rest of my life, and somehow I would have to build a life with that fact tucked deep inside of me. Maybe that was all anyone could ask for, to find true love once. Sometimes it stayed, sometimes it didn't. But, I knew there would never be anyone else for me.

It was actually a relief to admit it rather than trying to deny it and bury it.

I was excited to be on my own again. I didn't want to have to answer to the Sterling Hathaways of the world anymore. I would no longer be a player in this cutthroat money business. I thought I was tough enough for it, I was wrong. I would leave and perhaps start my own investment firm. It would be much different than Berkshire-Hathaway. I would do some good. I would help businesses and become a nice person again. I just didn't have the heart to go in for the kill anymore. I was going to throw away every pair of four inch heels I owned. Whether they were **Manolo Blahniks** or not.

I wondered wistfully how my name would have looked on the side of the building.

Maybe I would take a small break and go visit Renee. I definitely had enough money saved up. Sunny, warm Florida sounded pretty good. At some point, very soon, I had to go back to Forks. I was running from pain and I knew I had to face it. Someday Charlie would be gone and I would only be full of regret at not seeing him as often as I could have.

I caught a vision of me as an old woman. Alone and looking back on my life. I knew that my heart would still belong to Edward then. I winced at the pain. I once promised him that I would love him forever. One way or another, I supposed that was still going to happen.

I was so deep in thought that when I finally looked up, I realized I didn't have any idea where I was. I looked up and down the path I was on. The trees looked different covered in snow, and the path was unfamiliar to me.

I was lost.

The temperature was dropping. Before the air had been still, but now a cold wind was beginning to blow. It had started snowing again. I looked at my watch and was surprised to see that I had been walking for almost two hours. I pulled my scarf tighter around my neck and dug my hands deep down into my pockets. My fingers curled around something. I pulled it out and realized it was my i-pod.

I stared at it for a few seconds. I had no idea why it would be in my coat pocket. I was still wearing the same coat I wore to the party last night and at the office this morning. As far as I knew, my I-pod was still sitting on my dresser. I turned it on and scrolled down through the menu and had a great shock. All my music was gone and in their place was one title over and over again. Listed all the way to the bottom was, "Bella's Song".

Losing the music was no great tragedy. I hated every rock and rap song on there. But my heart dropped as I realized there was only one person that could have done it. I almost put the i-pod back in my pocket, but I knew that at some point I would listen to it. The day was already stellar, I might as well do all I could to make it worse.

I wondered how and when he did this. It had to have been this morning before we walked into the conference room. Was it another part of his plot to trick me into surrendering his company? I decided it didn't really matter what I heard. Still I took a large breath and steeled myself for what was to come.

I put on the earphones and started the song. The piano played a simple but pretty melody, then I heard his beautiful velvet voice. The words caught me off guard.

_I can't believe it's over,_

_I watched the whole thing fall,_

_And I never saw the writing that was on the wall._

_ - - -_

_If I only knew,_

_The days were slipping past,_

_That the good things never last,_

_That you were crying._

_ - - -_

_Summer turned to winter, _

_And the snow it turned to rain,_

_Then the rain turned into tears upon your face._

_I hardly recognize the girl you are today,_

_And how I hope it's not too late._

_It's not too late._

_ - - - _

_Cause you are not alone, _

_I'm always there with you._

_And we'll get lost together, _

_Til the light comes pouring through._

_When you feel like you're done, _

_And the darkness has won, _

_Babe you're not lost._

_ - - - _

_When your world's crashing down, _

_Cause you can't bear the thought,_

_I said, Baby you're not lost._

_ - - - _

_Life can show no mercy,_

_It can tear your soul apart._

_It can make you feel like you've gone crazy,_

_But you're not._

_ - - - _

_Though things have seemed to change, _

_There's one thing that's still the same,_

_In my heart you have remained, _

_And we can fly, fly, fly away._

_ - - - _

_Cause you are not alone, and I am there with you,_

_And we'll get lost together, Til the light comes pouring through._

_When you feel like you're done,_

_And the darkness has won, _

_Babe, you're not lost. _

_When your world's crashing down, _

_And you can't bear the cross,_

_I said baby, you're not lost._

_ - - - _

_Baby, you're not lost._

Tears were running down and freezing to my cheeks. I'm not sure how many times I listened to it. It just kept playing over and over. He knew I was lost. Then, why didn't he save me? Had he been trying to trick me last night? Had I just become so cynical after three years in this business that I just immediately assumed the worst? Was I just trying to protect myself from getting hurt again? I felt my phone vibrating in my pants pocket.

I pulled it out and saw it was Simmons. I sniffed before I answered. "Hey Simmons."

He seemed out of breath. "Bella, there is something I've got to tell you."

I prepared for the worst. A few scenarios ran through my head: Hathaway was storming the office with a machine gun, he had placed a S.W.A.T. team outside my apartment, or he had put out a contract for a Mafia hit on my life.

"What's going on?" I stammered.

"I wasn't supposed to find out," he began. "I was waiting for Edward to sign all the papers, because I wanted to talk to him. He was signing his name as fast as he could. He seemed anxious to get out of there. I overheard two of C- CORP'S lawyers talking. They were amazed that you had come in and made that announcement. Bella, last night Edward had kept Harry Banks up all night long drafting the documents that turned C- CORP over to _you_."

It took me a few moments to realize what Simmons had said. "What?" Was all I could manage.

"Yes, Bella. He gave you France, Italy, and Alaska and everything else that Harry threatened he would make us fight for years to get. I didn't believe it, so as soon as Edward was done, I pulled him out of the room and asked him, and he confirmed that it was the truth." He paused a moment. "He is demanding to speak to you. He is adamant I tell him where you are. What should I do?"

I was standing there in the snow, speechless. I tried to form a word but it wouldn't come out.

Simmons started speaking again. "Bella, are you still there? Where are you?"

"I don't know," I answered meekly.

"What do you mean you don't know?" He answered doubtfully.

I was a little embarrassed. "I'm somewhere in Central Park . . I . . . just started walking and . . ." My voice trailed off. I was in shock and starting to cry again. Edward was willing to give me the company that meant so much to him and his family just to prove to me that he loved me. I really was a complete fool.

I heard Simmons talking to someone and then he was back on the phone. "Bella, stay where you are. He's coming."

Simmons kept talking, but after I heard that Edward was coming, I dropped the phone back into my pocket without hanging up and started running back the way I had come, following my footprints in the snow.

I didn't notice the cold. I didn't feel the wind. I just kept running. For the first time in a long time, I knew what I was running to. It was starting to snow harder. It was sticking to my eyelashes and falling on my cheeks. My breath was visible in large puffs as I kept running faster.

I came around the bend and went through a tunnel, and then I realized with relief that I knew exactly where I was. I was no longer lost. I ran past a playground covered in snow and under a covered pavilion. I then crossed a bridge that spanned a frozen stream. In the summer, this stream flowed into the large lake that was now frozen with a thick sheet of ice. I didn't want to take the time to run all the way around the lake, so I stepped out on the ice and began lightly shuffling across it. It worked out fine. While I ran over the areas that were covered in fresh snow, it wasn't at all slippery. But then I hit a large area near the middle of the lake where the wind had been whipping harder and blew all the snow away.

I fell to my knees to catch myself and struggled to get back up again. The snow was cold on my hands and I could feel the sharp, cold ice digging into my palms. Every time I would begin to stand, my feet would slip out from under me. My dream came back to me. I was reliving the desperation I felt in my dream of that frenzied intense desire to get to someone. Now I knew who that someone was.

All of the sudden, I saw two hands as white as the snow come down to me and grab my own.

"Bella, I love you," the velvet voice sounded like a bell in the wilderness.

I lifted my face to meet his as he pulled me up. His face twisted in pain as he said, "I am so sorry I put you through thi . . . ."

I couldn't wait another second to kiss him. I smashed my lips to his and sighed as I again felt those cold lips touch my own. My lips pushed hard against his and he answered me completely.

My arms wrapped around his neck and my hands went into his hair and it was like I had been in a small, dark room for seven years and suddenly stepped out into the brilliant sunlight.

He held me up and I wrapped my legs tightly around him and I heard him breath out a ragged breath and begin kissing me again. He made no effort to pull me away and I'm not sure he could have stopped me. I needed him more than air at that moment. He held me up with one arm and ran his other hand along my cheek and wiped my tears away. These tears were different. They were tears of hope. Tears that proved that I was again alive.

I kissed every inch of his face and his neck and I shivered with joy as my hands again were able to touch and caress his lovely face. Our hair was wet from the snow and we were dripping and standing on a frozen lake in a snowstorm and I was happier than I had ever been.

"I'll never leave you again," he whispered when our lips parted for a moment.

"Damn right you won't." I answered back. I felt him smile against my lips.

"Simmons said you were lost," he whispered.

I put my hands on each side of his precious face and breathed out, "Not anymore."

I looked deep into his golden eyes and marveled that such a priceless, exquisite being could love me. Especially after all I had put him through. He was just as beautiful inside and he was on the outside. I wanted so much to be worthy of his love. I touched his face softly and whispered. "I'm sorry I ran last night."

"It was your turn," he breathed out as his lips ran along my jaw. "Now we're even."

My breath was coming fast and shallow. As I whispered, "I love you."

He put his hand behind my head and kissed me with so much force that I became lightheaded as I felt my heart stop and start again.

He turned and began walking off the ice, I didn't stop kissing him. My hands were tight around his neck and holding him to me as I kept his lips pressed against my own.

I was aware of a distant yelling. I finally realized that it was coming from my pocket. Simmons was still on the phone!

I put my phone to my ear and said, "Simmons?"

"Bella, are you all right?" he asked frantically.

"Yes, I'm perfect," I said smiling. "He found me."

"That's great, yeah, uh, I'm really happy for you, but your soon to be ex-boss, Sterling Hathaway is on the warpath, and is demanding to see you."

I couldn't stop smiling. Edward was kissing my neck and I giggled as I said, "I'll be right there."

"Did you just giggle?" Simmons sounded as surprised as if I stripped off my clothes and started dancing on the table right in the conference room.

I laughed and hung up. "I have to go see Mr. Hathaway," I mumbled against Edward's lips.

"That should be fun," he chuckled. "How long will you be?"

I kissed him again and said, "Depends, on what kind of weapon he greets me with. A spear could take awhile, a gun, however, could get the job done fairly quickly."

He pulled back to look at me. "I'm coming with you," he said seriously.

"Yes, you are," I said. "He should meet the person who started all this trouble." I looked deep into his eyes. "Besides, Mr. "C", I am not letting you out of my sight any time soon."

He swallowed hard and pulled me to him. He kissed me with so much love and emotion that I could scarcely take it all in.

When he finally pulled away he whispered, "I thought I'd lost you forever."

I kissed him on his neck and whispered in his ear, "Give me forever and all is forgiven."

He took my face by the chin and looked deep into my eyes as if searching for something. I was lost in his beauty. Staring into the only eyes that would ever hold my heart. Finally, he brushed his lips across mine and huskily said, "Deal."

I smiled and felt the tears in the corner of my eyes as I kissed him softly all over his face.

"After this meeting with Hathaway, I would like to go somewhere much more pleasant," he said warmly.

"My place?" I tried to sound alluring.

His eyes were bright as he smiled and said, "Tiffany's"

I felt my throat constrict and my heart pause as I realized he was proposing to me. When I didn't answer right away he swallowed hard and said, "Too soon? I should have waited for a while. This is all too much for you isn't it?"

I kissed him softly, then I ran my fingers over his cheek as I said, "Edward, I'll marry you anytime, anywhere."

My legs were still wrapped around him and he was looking up at me. He stared at me and then a huge smile spread across his face. Our foreheads touched as we held on to each other tight.

He slowly lowered me down to the ground and held my face in his hands as he whispered, "I _cannot_ live without my life. I _cannot_ live without my soul."

I ran my finger lightly over his lips and he caught my palm and held it to his cheek as he closed his eyes.

"Edward," he opened his eyes and looked at me. "I just heard the song you wrote for me. It's beautiful," I whispered.

He smiled slightly as he said, "You bring parts out in me that I thought died long ago."

His phone rang and he looked to see who it was. He laughed.

"Alice just left me a text message."

"What does it say?" I asked.

"Rosalie is demanding that you not throw away your shoes. She is pretty sure the two of you are the same size." He chuckled and paused.

"What else did she say?" I urged.

"She says she bought three wedding dresses this morning for you to try on."

I groaned, and then laughed. I had missed Alice.

I put my arms around his neck and gazed longingly into his face. He stared back at me, his beauty more than I could possibly be expected to handle.

"I don't want to wait very long to be your wife," I had to tell him the way I felt. I had kept every emotion and feeling bottled in me for so long, it actually caused pain to not let it out.

His eyes closed for a moment, and when they opened, I saw passion and longing smoldering in a golden fire. His lips were on mine in a serious and desperate way as our fingers tangled in each other's hair and held us tightly together. Suddenly, it was much too hot for a coat. He pulled away just long enough to whisper breathlessly, "Anything you say."

Eventually, I had to pull away for a breath, and I snuggled my face into his marble chest. He took my hand and kissed it as we began walking out of the park. I was going to be lost with him forever, and it was the only place I would ever want to be.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Sigh. Finally! Man. It took long enough!

**I AM POSTING THE EPILOGUE RIGHT NOW! I AM WAITING ABOUT 10 MINUTES, OTHERWISE IT DOESN'T WORK FOR ME. DO NOT FORGET THE EPILOGUE!!!!!!**


	16. EPILOGUE

**EPILOGUE - "BEGINNING"**

**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - **

Three days later I awoke to ice cold lips pressing on my stomach. I was smiling before my eyes even opened. I looked down at him and ran my fingers through his hair.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled into my skin. "But I just couldn't wait any longer for you to wake up."

I smiled as I pulled him up to my lips. "You did keep me up the whole night, but all is forgiven."

He laid his ice cold body completely over my own and I shuddered with complete joy.

"Mrs. Cullen," he purred.

"Yes, Mr. Cullen," I breathed.

"So far this marriage thing is pretty amazing," he smiled as his lips lightly pressed on mine.

My fingers ran up his marble back and he sighed. "Amazing doesn't quite cover it," I breathed out. I bit his bottom lip softly and then ran my tongue over his mouth.

His eyes lit up like fire as he pulled back slightly. His voice was disapproving. "You have to be just a little bit good until you're unbreakable."

I pouted. "The trips we take to Florida and Forks, they don't have to be really, really long, do they?"

He rested his forehead on mine and breathed out hard. He shook his head and said deeply, "If we didn't have something very important to do here in the City today, I would be tempted to race you back to Carlisle right now."

"We don't need Carlisle," I whispered.

"True," he smiled his crooked smile for a moment, and then his eyes clouded over a bit. "Still, I would like to have him close by, just in case."

I looked at the clock. "I don't need to get ready for an hour yet."

He smiled and ran his lips across my collarbone. Then his cold lips began traveling up to my mouth. His kisses made me forget my name.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

A little over an hour later, we walked out into the cold December morning. Edward was holding onto my gloved hand as we walked. We both instinctively looked up to check the sky. Thick clouds hovered just above the Manhattan skyline, and we both looked at each other and smiled.

Edward hailed a cab and we were soon traveling East, towards Staten Island. I could see the Statue of Liberty far out in the harbor long before the taxi reached the shore. We stood in line for the Staten Island Ferry trying to stay inconspicuous. I looked around warily just in case either one of them were early. The crowded ferry docked just a few hundred yards from the Statue of Liberty, and we made our way down the pier, and crunched on fresh snow as we walked towards the large green statue. But instead of making our way into the heated visitor's center like everyone else, we ducked into a grove of trees just to the left of the building.

I was blowing into my hands to keep warm and Edward moved farther away from me, not wanting me to catch the chill off his skin. I wasn't having any of that. I pulled him closer to me and just the thrill of feeling his cold lips on my cheek sent electricity racing through my body that warmed me instantly. I was nestling my face into his chest when his head suddenly darted to the side and he said, "Thomas is coming."

The ferry was still some distance out, but I knew that Edward could already hear his mind.

"He's wondering who is supposed to meet him here," Edward said with his eyes closed, concentrating. "He is still very hurt and saddened over losing you." Edward's arms instinctively wrapped tighter around me. He opened his eyes and placed his hands on each side of my face. His eyes were like jewels. "I don't know what I'd do if you said good-bye to me."

I gazed back and said, "You would probably shut everyone out and work for a high power investment firm in New York City, and strike fear into everyone you cut off at the knees."

He chuckled as his lips grazed across my forehead. "That's sounds pretty bad," he teased.

My thoughts traveled back to Vaughn. I wish I could have explained that I never should have dated him in the first place. It was my fault. I knew I was never going to love anyone but Edward, but I had selfishly tried to make a life for myself anyway.

Now, three days later, I was attempting to make things as right as I could. I remembered our talk in the carriage, and the girl he could not forget. The ferry was docking and it wasn't long before we saw Vaughn come walking down the pier. He looked a little confused, and a little embarrassed. Edward and I backed farther into the trees. Five minutes later, Edward alerted me that the next ferry was approaching.

"She's on the boat," Edward smiled.

I jumped up and down clapping my hands.

Ten minutes later, we were scrutinizing every person who came off the ferry. Suddenly Edward said, "There she is."

I peeked around his arm, and then took a step forward to get a closer look. A woman in her mid twenties walked hesitantly down the sidewalk. She held her coat tightly around her in more of a self conscious gesture than anything else. She had beautiful long dark hair that fell in soft curls around her face, and high cheekbones that were red from the cold. Her eyes were large and almond shaped and as she came closer I saw that they were dark green.

"She's beautiful!" I whispered.

Edward's seemed to look at her appraisingly. "Not as breathtaking as the girl he just lost, but she'll do."

I looked sideways at him as I said, "Good answer."

Vaughn had been examining the crowd that came off the ferry, and when he saw her, I watched his eyes widen in surprise. A large smile spread across his chiseled face.

"Kristen, is that you?" His face showed shock and unbelief. He walked quickly to her and she looked up at him and tilted her head in confusion, and then suddenly her face brightened with recognition.

"Thomas Vaughn . . . from Rockmont High School, right?"

Thomas' easy smile spread across his face. "Yes, that's right." He looked around and said, "What are you doing here?"

She looked at him sheepishly. "Well, I got this invitation, on really nice paper I might add, to come here at 11:00 on December 5th. I have no idea why." She shrugged her shoulders and smiled at him.

He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out an envelope. He pulled out the paper inside of it and said, "Did it look like this?"

She took it from him and looked at it for a moment and blinked in surprise.

"Exactly like this," she replied suspiciously.

She looked up at him and asked, "Did you do this?"

He was shaking his head before she finished. "No!" He said emphatically. "I swear I had nothing to do with this." He swallowed hard and said, "But I hope someday I get the chance to thank the person that did."

They stared at each other for a long moment and then Kristen said, "You know, every once in a while your face just pops into my head, and I have often wondered what happened to you."

His eyes never left her face as he took a deep breath and said, "I know just what you mean."

"Are you still playing football?" She asked.

"Funny you should ask that," he chuckled and then said, "Would you like to talk about it over coffee?"

Her smile showed perfect rows of white teeth as she nodded her head and said, "Yes, I would love that."

Edward and I watched them walk back to the Ferry together.

"Well," Edward sighed. "If this first meeting has any bearing on their future, I predict from the thoughts that were charging through their heads that they are going to be very happy together."

I raised my fist in the air and said, "Yes!"

We waited inside for the next ferry, and then hailed a taxi for my apartment. When we began driving, I looked at Edward and groaned. "Alice is going to have a huge party waiting for us when we get there, isn't she?"

His smile was bright. "There would have been no living with her if I hadn't given in. She is beside herself that she didn't get to throw the wedding of the century." He laughed deeply. "She may never forgive you for the fact that Michael Simmons got to be your maid of honor."

I groaned again.

"The party with your family, then we stop in Florida and Forks to break the news and then a three day meeting with Carlisle, then we're off . . . somewhere . . . just the two of us, right?" I looked at him expectantly.

"Whatever you want, Mrs. Cullen." His velvet voice was so gentle and warm.

"Say it again," I whispered.

"Mrs. Cullen," he purred. His lips were on mine as he spoke.

"I'm glad that we're going to Forks," he said. "There are a few things I need to get from your floorboards."

I pulled back with a very confused look on my face.

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

His gave me his crooked smile, and my heart skipped three beats, and started again. "I'll tell you when we get there," he whispered into my neck.

The taxi was passing through Wall street. I laid my head on his shoulder and said, "Edward, I never thanked you for something."

He tilted his head down to look at my face, "What?" He asked.

"For loving me, all this time . . . for seeing past the monster I was through all those meetings. For knowing that there was something of worth deep inside of me."

He turned so that he was facing me and I looked up into his eyes. I heard a deep ancient sigh escape from his lips and his fingers brushed my cheek. "Oh, Bella." He swallowed hard. "I have wanted to thank you for the same thing ever since the night I first heard you say my name."

His kiss was so soft and gentle, yet it held so much emotion and love. This was too much. Too much happiness. Too much joy. Too much bliss.

When our lips parted, he whispered, "You have no idea how much more beautiful you are now than when you were eighteen. You take my breath away."

We reached the apartment and when we got in the lobby he said, "You know, we don't have to leave for the airport for another two hours."

Before I could blink, Edward's lips were at my jaw running back and forth.

"We could play a game of Scrabble," I offered breathlessly.

He laughed, and it sounded like music. "That's not the game I was thinking of," his lips were behind my ear.

The elevator door opened and I ran into it as I yelled, "Race you!"

He stood watching the doors close with a smug look on his face. I knew this was a race he would win, and this time, I didn't care one bit.

- - - - - - - - - -

**Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. This has been the best thing ever. Thank you for being my Twilight Friend. - edwardsoul**


	17. PHONE CALL

**I HAVE HOOKED THIS ON TO THE ORIGINAL, TO MAKE IT EASIER FOR ANYONE TRYING TO FIND IT.**

Wow. This sequel has been a long time in coming. I want to thank everyone for keeping this story alive. I don't think a day has gone by that I haven't had some sort of message by way of review or PM about this story. You are all truly amazing.

I have had everything from awesome people translating LOST into other languages, to yucky people plagiarizing my story and calling it theirs. No kidding!

I started this just a few months after LOST, but I didn't think anyone would want to read it. It was just for me. But, I kept writing and many asked for a sequel, so . . . . . . . . If you hate it, I will understand.

**3 REASONS YOU SHOULD NOT READ THIS STORY:**

1. SIMMONS IS THE MAIN CHARACTER, EDWARD AND BELLA ARE ALL THE WAY THROUGH IT, BUT IT IS IN SIMMONS POV.

2. IT HAS BEEN LIKE A YEAR AND A HALF SINCE MANY OF YOU HAVE READ LOST. FOR SOME IT WAS JUST YESTERDAY, BUT FOR THE ORIGINAL READERS, YOU MAY NOT EVEN CARE ANYMORE!

3. I CAN'T THINK OF ANOTHER REASON. SO I GUESS THERE ARE JUST TWO.

To help the original readers, I have given you a quick summary:

Bella and Michael Simmons worked for a NYC firm called Berkshire-Hathaway.

Bella was heartless and vowed to take down C-Corp

Edward was C-Corp (yikes!)

Bella had started to date a hot guy named Thomas Vaughn

Bella ended up breaking Vaughn's heart

Bella gave Edward back his company – after she put Edward through a lot

Bella left to be with Edward after she quit the Firm

Bella and Edward got married (yay!)

E & B set Vaughn up with his first love from High School – Kristin Roberts

Alice is very mad that she was not Bella's bridesmaid – it was Simmons

Lola is the boutique owner who helped Bella pick out her dresses

Rosalie wants Bella's awesomely expensive shoes

- - - - - - -

Simmons is a player, but he is also sweet and intelligent

He is a 6'2 surfer boy from California

He is very hotly handsome

*Lucky for you this story is about 20,000 words shorter than LOST

***THIS STORY IS ALREADY DONE. I WILL UPDATE EVERYDAY!**

**CHAPTER 1 - PHONE CALL**

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

12:47 p.m..

I was timing my lunch hour to the exact second that I would have to walk back into the offices of Berkshire Hathaway. I didn't want to step one foot into that building before I had to. When Bella was here, we would usually grab something quick and eat while we worked. These days, I looked for any excuse to get out of that place for the precious full hour. Anything to get away from the stress. When Bella was here . . . when Bella was here.

I found myself saying that a lot.

It was a mistake to compare things at work to the way they were before she left, but I did it all the time. Back then, work had been so exciting. I had loved it. Relished it. Now, it was drudgery. It was almost painful to get up every morning for another day.

12:48. Time to get up and head back.

I sighed heavily as I paid the tip on my sandwich and coffee and walked out of the Deli. I clenched my teeth. It was January and the cold wind was biting as I hunched down further into my coat. I usually let my scarf hang limply, but now it was a necessity. I wrapped it around my neck and ducked my head into the chill. There was a news stand that was located across the street from the office building, and without really thinking about it, I glanced up at the magazines. The cover of STAR magazine caught my eye and made me stop in my tracks.

"Thomas Vaughn Finds New Love"

_Well, well, _I thought. _He certainly got over Bella fast_.

Vaughn had been broken hearted when Bella ended things. He had sounded frantic the last time I talked to him. I could remember how his voice shook on the phone. He had just heard the news of Bella's marriage and he was beside himself.

I understood his shock.

After all, Bella had just broken up with him four days earlier. Actually, Bella's quick marriage to Edward was a shock to all of us. Now, here was Thomas Vaughn, just a month later, getting his picture taken with some beautiful brunette. I couldn't help myself. I knew I had to get back to the office, but I really wanted to see what the article had to say. I looked from side to side like I was doing something wrong, as I picked up the magazine and began reading.

New York City was buzzing today after Thomas Vaughn was spotted on Saturday night with a gorgeous brunette. Her name is Kristin Roberts (27), from Muncie, Indiana. Roberts and Vaughn were standing outside the Ford Theater in Times Square, and appeared to be much more than acquaintances!

Friends say Vaughn is finally getting over the jolt he received from the surprise wedding of his ex-fiancee, Isabella Swan (25), to an unidentified businessman. In a strange turn of events, the court is not releasing the name of the man that Swan married. It is something totally unheard of, and was sure to come as a shock to Vaughn.

"He was devastated," a family member told STAR. "Thomas was quite shaken by the whole thing."

Undoubtedly, with the news of Swan's resignation as Vice President of Berkshire-Hathaway and her marriage three days later, Vaughn must have realized he had no other choice but to move on.

Swan has not been publicly seen since her private wedding at the courthouse took place.

Michael Simmons (24), Swan's former assistant and former boyfriend, was apparently the only guest at the wedding. He has remained silent about the matter and has refused to comment on Swan, her new husband, or Thomas Vaughn.

I put the magazine down. I was wincing from being labeled as Bella's former boyfriend. Eventhough it was completely untrue, at first it had been sorta great to have my name linked to Bella's. Now, it was just another reason for the staff at work to gossip and snicker behind my back.

_Ha!_ I thought. I'd like to see them try that snickering behind my back if Bella was still here. They had all been terrified of her. _If_ Bella was still here. I sighed hard. I wished that Bella were here. Nothing had been the same since she left.

I missed her terribly.

Since she had left there had not been one shouting match in the conference room, no 5 a.m. meeting to go over strategy one last time, and there had been no middle of the night phone calls from Bella at the office asking my opinion about what the value of the dollar in Prague had on our current client's stock options. There had not been one crying session under a desk either. Things at the firm had become absolutely monotonous and dull. It just wasn't the same.

Suddenly, my phone began to ring. I looked at the number and saw that it was my secretary. I threw the magazine back on the shelf and answered the phone as I began weaving through the cars to cross the street. My secretary informed me that Mr. Hathaway wanted to meet with me.

Great.

I grimaced as I crowded into the already full elevator that would take me to the 42nd floor. As I made my way upward, I tensed with the knowledge that Mr. Hathaway wanted to see me.

I knew exactly why he was calling me to his office.

Ever since Bella left, he had brought me in for a weekly interrogation for the sole purpose of finding out what Bella's next move was. I knew he was desperate to know if she was planning to start up her own firm, or join with a competitor, but he had never come right out and asked me anything specific. I knew he didn't trust me, but I was also the only person close enough to Bella that could give him anything to go on. Personally, I thought he was beginning to lose it.

Someone got off on the 27th floor, and I could feel the heat seeping under my collar. I unwrapped my scarf and loosened my tie to let in a little air. The tension rose the higher I climbed.

It had been a little over a month since Bella's stunt had caused a firestorm at Berkshire-Hathaway and I knew that the only reason I still had my job was because of that affidavit Bella had signed swearing to the fact that I had not been involved in any way in her decision to hand C-CORP back to the Cullens. Sterling Hathaway was looking for any reason to kick me to the curb. I was very aware of that fact.

It was bad enough, I thought, that although I had been the obvious choice to take Bella's place as Vice President, that Hathaway had gone in a different direction and hired one of the German affiliates to come in and "Restore the luster and grandeur that was tarnished by Isabella Swan," was how he had put it.

What Hathaway really meant was that this Hans Grunderman character was so mean that even his own family couldn't stand to be around him. He had been divorced five times and all his children had taken their mother's last name. His parents had moved to Finland and hadn't spoken to him in eleven years. But I, Michael Simmons, would be working intensely with him on a daily basis.

Mr. Hathaway's secretary announced me. I stopped just outside the door and straightened my tie. I rubbed my temples. I could feel a pretty good headache coming on. I took a deep breath and walked in.

He was seated behind his massive desk holding a glass filled with some sort of clear liquid. I would bet anyone a million dollars that it wasn't water. My guess was scotch - straight. He had become a world class drinker since Bella's lovely stunt.

"Sit down, Simmons," he growled.

There were two chairs in front of his desk. I walked up and chose the chair that was slightly farther away from him.

He began talking before I had even sat all the way down.

"How is Reynolds doing with the Nom -Tech merger?"

"Just fine, sir."

I knew he was moving slowly at first, and would soon start in on the real reason he sent for me.

He took another swig of the toxic substance in his glass and then said, "Is Reynolds up to the task of dealing with the press? When they catch wind of our firm's involvement they are sure to want an interview."

"Well sir," I replied. "He handled the press with ease when he was head of the Broder case, but I will prep him and make sure he is ready."

Hathaway took a large, labored breath and looked up at the ceiling for a moment before bringing his face down to meet mine.

"Have you heard from Swan?" He asked flatly.

_Here we go_, I thought.

"No sir." I tried to sound disinterested. "I still haven't heard from her since the last time Harry Banks called."

He looked at me through red, glassy eyes as I continued to explain, "That matter has been completed, and I believe she has severed all ties to this firm. I would guess she is still on her honeymoon."

He flinched when I said the word "honeymoon" and put down his empty glass. He rubbed his puffy eyes and looked down at his desk. He looked battered and saggy. He took a haggard breath and then with trepidation asked me another question. It seemed to take great courage for him to ask me.

"Simmons, she took her list of contacts with her when she left. What do you think the chances are of her starting up another firm here in the City and competing against us?"

Finally.

After four weeks of this he finally had the nerve to just come out and ask me what he really wanted to know. I saw sweat above his upper lip. All this time he had been worried that the most heartless and ruthless she-devil in New York was planning on going against him. It didn't hurt that she was young and beautiful. Maybe, if I had all his stress it would drive me to drink too. Especially since he had intended on putting that beautiful she-devil's name on the building right after his.

I sat motionless. I wasn't sure how to handle this situation. Did he think I was secretly plotting something with Bella? Did he think that I was planning on joining Bella if she returned?

I would.

I would be out of here before he could reach for that bottle of scotch.

I decided to go with honesty. At least for now.

"I have had absolutely no contact with her, Mr. Hathaway. I haven't got a clue about her plans, or if she even has any plans to return to New York."

He stared at me, and I stared back unflinchingly. His left eye tightened as he continued watching me. It was like two gunfighters staring each other down before they each reached for their weapon. Finally, he blew out a rush of air and said, "Fine, Simmons. You can go."

I stood up and strode quickly out of the room and exhaled deeply as I made my way to my office. It appeared I was safe, at least for another week. It suddenly occurred to me that he could have someone watching me, following me. I shook my head. Now who was paranoid?

My secretary handed me a stack of messages. I boringly thumbed through them until I found one that caught my eye. Lanita had called. Ah, this was my first good news on this Monday. Her call meant she must be back from that Sports Illustrated swimsuit photo shoot in Peru. She was an exotic beauty from Belize. She had great dark brown eyes and she spoke with an amazingly sexy accent that was a mix of Spanish and Creole. Maybe this day would end much better than it began.

My cell phone rang and I groaned. It was my mother. There was never an easy way to talk to my Mom. She was always probing, digging for details that I didn't want to share. I knew that she was disappointed that I had chosen this line of work. She didn't find it stable. I could hear her now. "Michael, dear. Are you still doing that money thing? Move back here and settle down with a nice girl." My parents still lived in Newport Beach. My all too perfect older brother lived just 15 minutes away. Perfect wife, perfect kids, perfect everything. I pushed the ignore button and got to work.

I got home a little before 7:00 p.m., and planned on picking up Lanita in about an hour. I was about to take a shower when I heard my phone ringing. I didn't recognize the number or the area code, so I let the machine take it. I heard the beep and ducked my head out of the bedroom to hear the message when I heard Bella's voice on the speaker. I dove for the phone.

"Bella!" I cried.

"Simmons. I am glad to see that you would still answer the phone even though you knew it was me," she said.

"Why wouldn't I answer the phone?" I asked in a surprised voice.

"Well," she began. "I have caused you quite a bit of trouble. I read about Hans Grunderman. Tough break."

It was so good to hear her voice. I wanted so much to ask her when or even _if_ she was coming back. "So, how is the honeymoon?" I asked.

There was a long pause on the other end. When she finally spoke, it was all breathless and airy. I could hear the smile in her voice.

"It's wonderful."

I remembered seeing them on the dance floor in the Rainbow Room, and the way they looked at each other at the wedding. I was pretty sure I had a firm grip on how the honeymoon was going. It was a stupid question to ask anyway. I cleared my throat and asked a much more useful question.

"So, what's up? Are you coming back soon?"

"Yes, I am," she said in a matter of fact tone. "Edward and I are going to be in town this weekend. We're going to pack up my apartment. I will be ending my lease at the end of January. I was hoping you would come over and help so we could see you one more time."

_One more time? Why just one more time?_ I wondered_._

"That would be great," I said.

"We will be at the apartment on Saturday. Can you come over then?"

Bella sounded so happy. "You bet. I'll be there." I tried to sound happy too.

"By the way," she said. "Edward's sister, Alice will be there. Try not to take it too personally if she acts a little angry towards you. She'll get over it."

"Angry? Bella, why should Edward's sister be angry at me?" I squeaked. How big was Edward's family anyway?

Bella ignored my question as she continued. "Oh, and Rosalie will be there too. She doesn't fully trust me on the shoe thing. You might notice a slight hostility on the part of Rosalie as well. Don't take it personally. She won't get over it. That's just the way she is."

Who the heck was Rosalie? What was the shoe thing?

"Simmons, you still there?" Bella asked.

"Yeah, Bella, I'm here. What time should I come over?"

"Whenever. We'll be starting early. Just come when you can, and Simmons, thanks so much! It'll be great to see you!" Then she hung up.

I went back to the bathroom lost in my thoughts of Bella giving up her apartment and leaving New York. She made it sound like I would never see her again. I wondered if there was any chance I could talk her into staying. I had a few ideas. Maybe we could talk before she really said good-bye.

All of the sudden the prospect of seeing Lanita didn't thrill me. I knew why. Just talking to Bella on the phone was a thousand times more exciting than a night with Lanita.

I knew that the way I acted towards Bella had led many people to the mistaken notion that I had feelings for her. Heck, even STAR magazine was telling everyone that we had dated. Just for the record, I am not, nor have I ever been, in love with Bella. Okay, when I first met her I was . . . well, to say the least, very interested.

That lasted about three days.

My interest in her lasted just long enough for her fangs to sink into me when I asked her if it was really necessary that a report she demanded from me contain so much detail about the company that it would take 10 people at least a month to gather it all. She ordered me to have it on her desk the following Tuesday. With no help.

Just me.

I am totally serious.

I still remember how her eyes flared when she tore into me. I don't think she took a breath for three minutes straight while she ripped me apart. I remember the exact moment my adjectives describing her changed from captivating, stunning and fascinating, to words I would never say in front of my mother. Luckily, I later had the chance to prove myself to her and gain her respect. I also got to see the more human side of her as time went on, and the rest, as they say, is history.

The attributes I found in Bella were hard to explain. She challenged me. She kept me on my toes. She made me want to be better than I was. It wasn't that I was in love with Bella. What I missed was the excitement and sarcasm. The adrenaline and energy she inspired in me. I was especially intrigued the last few months when I saw the real Bella emerge. I was amazed at her strength and vivacity. She was like the best friend that I never knew I wanted. I didn't want Bella, but I knew that I did want someone like her.

I would miss her.

I sighed as I turned the shower on.

It was Monday night. Saturday couldn't come fast enough for me.

**I really hope that you will give this story a chance even though it is in Simmons' POV. I need to hear what you all are thinking, so please let me know! Next chapter tomorrow! **


	18. INVITATION

**wow. Wow. WOW! Are you guys freakin' kidding me? I am so overwhelmed I don't even know what to say. I was so worried that you would all reject the whole Simmons' POV thing, and yet . . . .you are all giving me a chance. Most are exctied about it and say that you have a little crush on him. (Me too.) I have the best readers by far!!!!!**

**Did you guys see the New Moon trailer? What did you think? I loved it, well, I loved Taylor Lautner's abs. I am sad to see that they changed the New Moon movie from the book just like they did to Twilight. Why are they messing with perfection? I am sure I will love the movie though. It looks great! **

A note to **Jessica Gao**. You are not registered and so I have never been able to thank you for your moving and lovely reviews.

And a note to the gal who inspired the Vaughn's girlfriend **Kristin**, thanks for reading!

**Chapter 2 - INVITATION**

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Saturday turned out to be rainy and windy, but the weather did nothing to dampen my mood. I was on my way to see Bella. I seemed to get more anxious with every stroke of the windshield wiper. When the taxi pulled in front of her building, I paid the driver and practically jumped out of the cab. As I pushed through the revolving doors and into Bella's lobby, I was met with a familiar voice.

"It's about time, Simmons."

I felt myself let out a big sigh. Bella looked absolutely happy. Happy didn't quite cover it. It was still hard to get used to seeing her that way. The vacant, desperate look I saw for two straight years was completely gone. It was obvious she had the life she'd always wanted. There was something else in her face too. There was peace.

I smiled. "It's 7 am on a Saturday morning. I would think a huge thank you and very large cup of coffee would be the correct way to greet me."

Bella laughed. She was taking a step towards me, but then moved back as Edward stepped between us.

"Excuse me," Edward said politely.

I was a little startled. I hadn't even heard him coming. He was carrying three boxes on each arm. They were balancing perfectly. I guessed the boxes were pretty light, probably full of bedding. But still . . . I worked out everyday and my chest was bigger than his, and I was pretty sure that I couldn't carry that many boxes.

"Hello, Michael," he said as he passed.

He wasn't even watching the boxes. I warily stepped back thinking a box was sure to fall. I squared myself and got ready to catch anything that came my way, but the boxes never swayed in the slightest. I brought my face back down to meet his.

"Hey Edward."

I tried very hard to keep my thoughts as harmless as possible, just in case.

After Edward passed by, Bella stepped forward and grabbed me by the arm and pulled me towards the elevators. "It's really great to see you," she said. "How are things at Berkshire-Hathaway?"

"Boring as hell without you," I muttered with a half smile on my face. We had just entered the elevator, when Edward smoothly glided in before the doors slid shut. My eyebrow raised. How did he load those boxes on that truck so quickly?

"How is Mr. Hathaway handling everything?" Bella then asked me.

I laughed a short laugh. "Well, he's paranoid, bitter, desperate and drinking."

"So, nothing's really changed," said Bella.

"Oh, it's definitely kicked up a notch," I said bitterly. "I am actually seriously thinking about other professional options."

Bella's eyes opened a bit wider. "That's great!" She said with enthusiasm. "You would be an asset to any company."

The doors opened on the 67th floor, and we were met by Edward's brother, Emmett. He nodded his head at me in recognition as a large smile spread across his face. He was just heading for the stairway with Bella's couch on his shoulder. His muscles pushed their way out of his shirt, but he didn't appear to be straining under the weight of the large leather couch. I had forgotten just how big he really was. I watched him swiftly descending the stairs until the door swung shut.

"Hey, Simmons, you coming?"

Bella was holding her door open, waiting for me to follow. As I entered her apartment, I looked around appraisingly. I had never been in her place before. My eyes went directly to windows that took up the entire North side of the Penthouse. I walked straight into the great room and went to look out at the cityscape. She had a very impressive view.

I was picking out buildings and streets that I knew, when I heard a voice from the kitchen.

"Hey Rosalie, come here for a second."

I heard a bored sigh from my left, and as I turned my head, I completely forgot about the view. For what I saw in front of me was the most amazing view my eyes had ever seen. Her iridescent blond hair reflected every facet of the light. Her legs were the reason legs were invented. I felt as if my blood had frozen in my veins.

And she hadn't even turned around yet.

A strange sound came out of my mouth.

She turned her head and I was able to see her face.

_Oh . . . . wow_. That was all I could come up with.

I had always been very good at the "Approach". I would slowly walk up to a woman as I casually ran my hands through my hair, letting a slow smile spread across my face. I would say something clever that would inevitably break the ice and turn her attention to me. I had to admit I was quite the master. I had seduced beautiful women from every continent. I had chased, and been chased by the most alluring creatures this world had ever produced. But this woman, this vision, was totally out of my league.

I had never seen skin like hers before. Her eyes were hypnotic. Her lips formed into a pout so perfect that she only had to tilt her head to get any man to do her bidding. I, for one, would crawl on my knees and fulfill her every wish.

She began to walk towards me, and I tried to recall anything remotely clever I had said to a woman in the past. It was taking all my energy to hold my desire in check.

She was a few feet away when her eyes fell on me. She quickly looked me up and down as the corner of her mouth went up in a sneer. She never even slowed down as she glided past me.

I turned around and stammered out in a high voice that was far from masculine, "Hi, I'm Michael."

She looked back at me, and her eyes narrowed, as a noise that sounded like a hiss escaped her perfect lips.

I stared after her trying to figure out what my next move should be, when suddenly Bella stepped into my line of vision. She had a knowing smile on her face. She walked up and took me firmly by the shoulders.

"Snap out of it, Simmons. There's not a chance."

I opened my mouth to protest, but she interrupted me.

"That is Rosalie. I warned you about her." She was shaking her head forcefully.

"Bu . . . bu . . . but Bella, I have never seen anything like that in my li . . ."

"And chances are you never will again," she interjected. She squared herself in front of me and tightened her grip on my shoulders. "Simmons, listen to me. Remember how _I _behaved? She-devil, take no prisoners? Do you remember that one corporate CEO that ran from the conference room in tears?"

Of course I remembered. There was a new saying going around the firm whenever someone got fired or an opponent was beaten in a spectacular way. The interns said that person got "Swanned".

"What does that have to do with anything?" I asked impatiently. I wanted to get in the kitchen and talk to that beautiful girl again. I moved to the side to go around her and once more, Bella stepped in front of me. She looked right into my eyes as she spoke. There was a sad smile on her face.

"She is 1,000 times worse than me on her best day, and she is like that all the time. It's just her normal way of behaving. . . and besides . . . she's married to Emmett."

My head snapped around to look at her, and then I froze. The image of that walking muscle carrying Bella's couch on his shoulder was making me think twice. I could still recall the crushing handshake the first time I met him. I glanced at Bella. She was grinning slightly.

"Come help me pack up my office stuff," she said with a sigh.

I couldn't believe it. I knew I would never see anything like her again. It was unimaginable for me to know that I could never have her. I looked back longingly at the kitchen as Bella took my arm and led me down a hallway and into the first room on the right.

It was a large room with a wall of windows facing West. A massive dark wooden desk sat in front of the windows, and on top of the desk sat a computer with the cords wound around it. The walls were covered with built in shelves that were full of books. There was a stack of empty boxes sitting in one corner.

"Okay," Bella said. "How about you start on that wall and just start filling up boxes with books. I will start on this wall over here."

She turned and began clearing a shelf when Edward walked in. He walked straight to Bella and gently kissed her on the cheek. He then took her right hand and held her wrist up to his face and inhaled deeply. I turned around and concentrated on the books.

Just as I reached around for another box, I saw Edward effortlessly lift the huge desk and sling it under one arm. I quickly moved across the room to help him, but he waved me away as he shook his head.

"It's hollow," he said as he knocked on the desk to prove his point.

It didn't sound hollow.

"At least let me help you get it through the doorway . . . ." by the time I finished, he was already out the door and heading down the hall.

"So," Bella began. "How is the Gazelle supermodel . . . or was it Sasha you are dating now?" She spoke with a tease in her voice.

"Actually," I paused slightly for emphasis. "I have been seeing a model from Belize. Her name is Lanita." I raised my eyebrows and tried to make the relationship sound more important than it was.

Bella wasn't fooled. "Ooooooh, Lanita." She sounded all breathy as she held her hands to her chest.

I laughed as I started in on another box. The truth was, Lanita wouldn't last the month. Versace was showcasing their spring line in three weeks, and there would be scads of runway models in town. They were always a little more temperamental than normal models, but well worth the extra trouble. They would be coming from all over the world. I hadn't dated anyone from Belgium yet. Perhaps I would try a new country. I breathed a large sigh as I winced a little. This all used to be so much more fun. Lately, I had been wondering if this was all life had to offer.

Bella finished a box and I heard her grunt as she pushed it to the side and reached for an empty one. "So," she said matter of factly, "I want to hear all about your plans. Are things really as bad as you said?"

I turned to look at her as I let out a frustrated breath of air. "Hans Grunderman is ridiculous. He is every bit as mean as you without any of the charisma. He is hated by one and all."

Bella looked at me with a knowing expression. "They hated me, too."

I shook my head. "No, Bella, they never hated you, they feared you. There's a difference."

She laughed with a scoff. "The ones I fired hated me."

I was about to protest, but I shrugged my shoulders instead. I couldn't argue with that one.

"So, are you interviewing with anyone?" She had stopped packing and had come over to stand by me. I raised an eyebrow as I shook my head.

"Hathaway is so paranoid right now. He calls me in every week to ask me if I've talked to you. I can't risk anyone finding out that I'm looking while Hathaway is watching me so closely. I would like to have a _new_ job before I quit my old one."

Bella's face fell. "I'm so sorry I've made things this hard for you. I didn't think through that part very well." She shifted her feet uncomfortably as she whispered, "I guess at the time I wasn't thinking about anything except getting Edward as far away as possible."

I gently shoved myself into her side with my shoulder. "You're forgiven," I said softly. I swallowed nervously as I tried to gather my thoughts. I wanted to talk to her about an idea that had been running though my head for the last month. This seemed as good a time as any. I cleared my throat and began.

"Actually, I have an idea of how you can make it up to me."

Bella tilted her head in confusion.

"Well," I stammered, "How about you and I start our own firm?"

Now it was Bella's turn to stammer, but I wasn't finished. I started to talk faster.

"We work so well together, and we would already have a reputation before we even started. With your client list and my social skills, we would be hard to beat. I bet some of the Berkshire-Hathaway employees would even jump ship and come with us."

I took a breath and finished my haphazard proposal. "I was walking past Battery Park the other day and I saw a sign advertising the perfect place for an office." I got more animated as my excitement rose. "It's on the 54th floor and looks out on the Statue of Liberty. It's only about 1500 square feet, but it's just the launching pad. And" . . . . I paused for effect. "You would get your name on the building after all, or in this case, on the office door. But I know that in time it would be on a large building some where."

I framed my hands like I was reading a marquee as I breathed out the words, "Swan & Simmons."

I looked down at her to try and gauge her reaction, and I wasn't encouraged with what I saw.

"I can't, Simmons," she said quietly.

I blinked in surprise. "Can't?" I questioned.

She tried to backpedal. "That was the wrong choice of words. What I mean is, I don't really have a desire to do that anymore."

All the air came out of me as I said, "But Bella, you are so good at what you do. You're the best."

She looked at me with even eyes. "_Was_ the best."

At that moment, Edward came into the room, and his face was full of concern. He looked first at Bella, and then at me. His lips were in a hard line and I wondered if he had been listening to our conversation. I was afraid he was angry that I had asked Bella to join me. I hastily began filling my box with books.

Edward left with the computer, and Bella and I spent the next thirty minutes on safer subjects. It was great to have an intelligent conversation with someone again. Hearing about the horrors of bikini waxes for models and the ever-present fear of gaining an ounce were wearing on me.

We cleared all the shelves and I followed Bella out into the main part of the Penthouse. I looked around in surprise. Less than an hour earlier, this place had been full of furniture, and now it was completely bare. I guess when you had people that could carry down couches and large desks single-handedly things went a lot faster.

A voice came from behind us. "Bella, we left your bedroom and bathroom intact so that you could get ready for tonight."

I turned my head in surprise. The person speaking sounded like a child. The voice was much too high for an adult. I then saw a small girl with a lovely face come bounding gracefully around the corner.

"Thanks, Alice," Bella said. She then gestured towards me. "This is Michael Simmons."

I put out my hand to say hello, but she stood there with her arms folded and her lips in a tight line. Bella looked at me with a smirk as she pointed at the girl and said, "This is Alice."

I studied her a little closer, and saw that her face had that same pale look that the rest of Edward's family had. I was beginning to notice too, that they all had the same strange purplish bruises under their eyes. I blinked in confusion as her eyebrows drew together and she frowned at me.

"Nice to meet you," she said flatly.

She moved gracefully past me, and I could have sworn she muttered something about "maid of honor". I turned to watch her leave, and was about to ask Bella if I had offended Alice in some way, when Alice suddenly turned back around and looked at me.

Her face looked so angelic, she had a smile that told me there was a secret that only she knew, and she wasn't about to clue me in. Her eyes narrowed as her smile turned mischievous. Again, I heard that silver voice.

"Have fun tonight."

She turned back around and gracefully flitted from the room.

I stared after her completely confused. What in the heck was she talking about?

"Excuse me."

I jumped out of my confusion to see Edward and Jasper standing behind me. I was standing right in their path to the front door. I moved over and then saw that Edward and Jasper were carrying all the boxes Bella and I had just spent the better part of an hour packing.

Those boxes were completely filled with books. Big books. Bella apparently didn't like to read short stories. Between the two of them, they were carrying every box we had packed. Edward walked casually past me and stopped to kiss Bella before he and Jasper glided out the door. I let out a frustrated gust of air as my hand ran through my hair. Hanging around with these deceivingly strong guys was starting to hurt my ego.

"Hey, did you hear me, Simmons?" I jumped slightly as Bella touched my arm.

"Wha . . . Oh, sorry, Bella. Did you say something?" I gave her my full attention.

"Would you like to go somewhere with me and Edward tonight?" She looked at me expectantly.

"Sure, what do you have planned?" My answer was yes, no matter what she wanted to do. My chest already felt heavy at the thought of having to say good-bye to her.

Her face twisted a little as she said, "Well, Edward really wanted to take me to a fancy place and dance with me tonight." She grimaced slightly as she said, "He surprised me this morning with tickets to a ball. It's at the Woolworth building. Edward bought six tickets, and Rosalie and Emmett are going, but Alice and Jasper have made other plans. Would you like to bring Lanita and come with us?"

A ball. It wasn't exactly what I had in mind. I was hoping for a quiet dinner, and perhaps late night drinks. I knew I wouldn't get much alone time with her. I really wanted the chance to talk more to Bella about my plans. I felt that it would take just a little more convincing for her to see how perfect our working together would be.

"I thought you were done with the whole dress-up thing," I teased. "You always hated that stuff."

Bella rolled her eyes. "The things you do when you're in love."

I laughed smugly. "Yeah, well, I can honestly say that I'm glad that I don't have to worry about that 'love' business."

Bella smiled and looked me seriously in the eye as she said, "Simmons, someday, you will fall in love, and you will go to the ends of the earth for that lucky girl."

I looked at her doubtfully. I had dated so many women, and none of them had ever made me feel anything close to what Bella and Edward had. Once or twice I thought maybe I had found someone special, but it always died quickly, and within a few weeks I was ready to move on. Maybe some people just aren't made to find a true love, I reasoned. That just made the argument for dating the most beautiful women on the planet all that more appealing. I would just go for the best and get as much out of life as I could. There were worst ways to spend a life.

At that moment, Rosalie came around the corner. "Bella, we need to get to that boutique if we are going to find a dress for tonight."

I suddenly became intensely interested in the design on Bella's ceiling. No reason to tempt myself any further. Emmett seemed like a pretty easy going guy, but I was fairly certain that if he found out I was making a play for his wife, he would become a different person. Frankly, I liked my arms attached to my body.

I heard Bella and Rosalie talking and turned away and left the room. The view of the city was a much safer place for me. As I looked out at the seemingly endless sea of buildings, I laughed at myself. I could never have dated Rosalie anyway. Being with Bella's sister-in-law couldn't be a good thing. I knew that if Rosalie and I had dated, it would have inevitably ended, and then things could have become awkward. She was the just high maintenance type I always seemed to be attracted to. I had already experienced first hand the rage of a super model when the relationship turned sour. Rosalie seemed like a fairly temperamental package. I was pretty sure she had hissed at me earlier.

Bella came into the room chuckling. "You did a nice job resisting temptation there, Simmons."

I looked down at her. "Thanks for talking some sense into me. It would have been a train wreck anyway."

Bella laughed again as she said, "I'm taking Rosalie to the boutique where I always used to buy my dresses. Lola is reserving the whole afternoon for us." Bella didn't look all that enthused. She started walking me to the door as she finished. "Edward and I will come to get you around 8:00 tonight, is that okay?"

"Yeah, sure, that sounds great," I answered.

"Thanks again, for helping me today. This went a little faster than I thought it would. I'm sure you had much more important things to do with your Saturday morning."

I was grateful she didn't know just how boring my life had become since she left.

"Well," I said with a smile, "If I can't help a former ice queen move out of her Penthouse Suite because she got married to a guy who owns a multi-billion dollar company that she let slip through her boss's fingers, then honestly, what kind of person would I be?"

She laughed heartily, and I realized I had never heard her do that before. I waved good-bye and headed to the elevator.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

Bella and Edward were coming to pick me up in twenty minutes. I was in the bathroom using the mirror to get my bow tie just right, when I heard my cell phone ring in the bedroom. It was Lanita. There was a huge amount of static on the phone. I could barely hear her. All I caught from the conversation were small pieces of sentences. The fact that she spoke with that heavy Spanish - Creole accent didn't help matters. "Flying to Rome . . . . .Tommy Hilfiger shoot . . . . . .sorry Baby".

I yelled into the phone for about half a minute before I realized she wasn't there anymore. Great. There was no way I was going to be the third wheel with Bella and Edward. This was ruining all my plans. Lanita didn't matter, but I had really counted on getting some more time to talk to Bella about my business idea.

Fifteen minutes later, Bella and Edward were at my door, and I began explaining my predicament. I was about to apologize for not coming with them, when Edward said, "Would you mind if I invited someone to take Lanita's place tonight?"

I stared at him warily. I was not much of a blind date kind of guy. I saw Bella turn to him in confusion as she asked, "Whom did you have in mind?"

Edward smiled as he shrugged his shoulders and said, "Tanya."

I saw a smile spread across Bella's face as she looked at me and said, "Say yes, Simmons. We'll have a great time."

My eyes narrowed suspiciously as I silently debated. Bella explained that Tanya was a close family friend, and had come with Alice and Jasper to visit the City.

On the one hand, a ball was probably not the ideal event for a first date. On the other hand, all the women that Edward had ties to that I had met, were stunning. I decided it was worth the risk.

"Okay, I'll trust you guys," I said with a sigh.

Edward was already on the phone. He was talking too fast for me to understand what he was saying. A few seconds later, he hung up.

"She will meet us there. Probably in about an hour."

Bella, who looked beautiful in her blue dress, smiled and took Edward and I both by the arm as we headed for the door.

Tanya. She sounded harmless enough. I would go on this blind date, and try to salvage what I could of the night. I wasn't going to let this chance go by. I would find a way to talk to Bella. My goal was to convince her to join me as business partners before the night was over. I hoped I wouldn't appear too rude to Tanya when she didn't receive my full attention. It wouldn't matter. I was sure that after tonight I would never see her again anyway.

I looked down at Bella and smiled. _Sorry Tanya_, I thought. I would put on a half-hearted show of charm and wit for her, but tonight my priorities were on planning for my future. Bella and I could be legendary. We could go down in the record books.

Tonight I would be working on my destiny.

**Hmmm . . . .do we see a story forming? You guys are fantastic. Do you know how much I love your reviews? See ya tomorrow . . . .**


	19. CHANGE OF FATE

**Thanks so much for the great encouragement! I totally forgot to wish you all a Happy Twilight Birthday yesterday!**

**Okay, you know the ball at the end of the movie "Enchantment"? I wrote this chapter with that scene in mind. The Woolworth building is the same as in the movie. I pictured that room as I wrote, but with tables set all around.**

**I am freaking out a little bit about something. Do we know Tanya'a last name? I have never been able to find it anywhere, but then again I am not the best researcher. I have given her a last name in this chapter. If we know her last name, tell me and I will immediately change it!**

**This scene starts out where we left. Bella, Edward, and Simmons are on their way out of Simmons' apartment.**

**Anyway, here goes . . . . . .  
**

**Chapter 3 - CHANGE OF FATE**

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

When we walked outside, the valet was standing next to Edward's car. I let out a long whistle when I saw it. It was sweet.

"This looks a lot like the Audi that Robert Downey Jr. drove in Ironman." I said with admiration.

Edward hit the button that unlocked the doors. "More or less," he said. "I made a few modifications to make it go a little faster."

A little _faster_? I froze with my fingers on the handle. Bella put down her window and said, "Are you getting in?"

I climbed in the back seat, and ran my hands lovingly over the upholstery. I heard the engine purr to life, and then, Edward began to drive. As a general rule, I drive fast. I consider the speed limit merely a suggestion. Still, as I sat in the back seat, I noticed my hands were a little clammy. Edward wove in and out of the lanes effortlessly, and although he spent most of his time looking at Bella, he never came close to hitting any of the cars he was continuously dodging. I let out a sigh of relief when the car finally came to a rest in front of the Woolworth Building.

We entered the ballroom at the top of a large staircase that looked down over the dance floor. The orchestra was playing and the floor was full of couples dancing. We descended the staircase and were led to our table, where we saw Emmett seated there alone. I prepared myself to see Rosalie again. Bella came and stood beside me.

"Thank you for coming, she said to me. "I know that you really wanted to back out when Lanita couldn't come. I remember the last time we were at a dance together, and the great time you had with Sasha. I hope you have a nice time tonight."

I looked at her knowingly. "I remember that you came to that same dance with Thomas Vaughn, but spent the night dancing with Edward and his brothers."

Edward was suddenly behind Bella. He put his arms gently around her waist and brought his mouth to her neck.

"Now, every dance will be _mine. _I'm not sharing you with anybody."

He then took her hand in his and led her out to the dance floor. I self-consciously scratched the side of my head as I stood out like a sore thumb in the middle of all the couples. I felt like a third, fourth, and fifth wheel. I walked over to the table and slouched down in a seat across from Emmett.

"Hey Mike, how ya doin?"

I tried to swallow my fear. Did he know that I had tried to pick up on his wife this morning? I couldn't have been the first.

"Ju . . . just fine, Emmett. And you?"

"Great," he said with a large smile. _Yeah_, I thought. I would be doing great too, if I was with someone that looked like Rosalie.

As if on cue, she came into view as she made her way to our table. That undeniable feeling of passion started to rise and build. Her dark red dress plunged down to almost her navel, and there were cut-outs on the side of her dress that made me wonder just what was holding the dress together.

Emmett stood up when she arrived, and I followed suit. She looked over at me like she had never seen me before, and said flatly, "Who are you?"

Emmett began to answer before I had a chance to begin. "This is Michael Simmons. He and Bella worked together at that firm."

She nodded her head without even looking at me and held her hand out to Emmett. "Let's go dance," she said. He took her hand and they were gone. The back of her dress plunged down so far that my mouth actually fell open. Any of the models I knew would have been green with envy at the sight of her in that dress. I was sure of it.

I sat down and tried to look as inconspicuous as possible. I felt foolish. I counted seven songs as I sat there becoming more and more restless. I slouched down in my seat and dropped my head back on the chair as I decided to pass the time counting ceiling tiles.

Tonight, this place was definitely designed with the purpose of being romantic. The only light in the room came from large candelabras spaced around the floor, and dimly lit chandeliers set high in the ceiling. I sighed in frustration. The only thing that kept me from leaving and not standing up this Tanya person, was my goal of talking to Bella. I checked my watch for like the fiftieth time.

I turned my attention to the dance floor and looked for Bella. What I found wasn't encouraging. They were staring deeply at each other as Edward held her as tightly to him as possible. She was melted against him as he bent to kiss her and they never stopped looking at each other through the kiss. Her hands were running through his hair. He grabbed the back of her dress and somehow brought her even closer to him. I wasn't sure they were even aware of the music. The building could fall down around them and they would probably never know. I was never going to get the chance to talk to her.

The eleventh song had ended. I had just finished counting ceiling tiles, again, and I had begun to make a design out of the wax from the candle burning in the middle of the table, when I glanced up to the top of the stairs.

There was a woman standing there, looking slowly from one end of the room to the other. One hand came up to put her hair behind her ear and I felt my heart stall for just a moment. Almost as clearly as if someone was speaking to me, I heard a voice coming from inside me. It spoke one word. Just one word. I blinked in surprise, but without a doubt I knew I couldn't question it.

I suddenly had that strange feeling like I was falling from a great height. I let out a large gush of air and leaned forward in my seat. _Please, oh please. Let_ _this be Tanya_, I begged. Eventhough somehow, I already knew.

More graceful than any runway model, I watched her come down the staircase. Her hair flowed around her face and I inhaled with growing anxiety as Edward and Bella met her at the bottom of the stairs and began talking to her. As they made their way across the room, I was able to see her more clearly. With every step I seemed in greater disbelief.

She had strawberry blond hair that fell long past her shoulders, yet framed her face perfectly. I had never seen hair quite that color before. She had high cheekbones and eyes that glowed in that golden tint I recognized from Edward's family. That should have registered with me on some strange level, but I was too far gone to let that fact sink in very far. I watched her smile as she approached the table, and I was amazed at the grace with which she walked. I knew I should stand, but I didn't have complete faith in my legs. My heart was pounding so madly. I grabbed the table, and somehow rose up to greet them. The four of us stood there for a moment until Bella broke the silence.

"Michael Simmons, I introduce you to Tanya Ivanov."

She reached her hand out to me and I bowed slightly as I took her hand and kissed it. I was surprised to find her touch as cold as ice, just like Edward and his family. Her skin was as hard as granite as I kissed her, but it only served to intrigue me further. Somehow, I got out the words.

"I am so pleased to meet you."

I still had her hand in mine. I didn't want to let go. I pulled her a little closer to me and said, "Would you dance with me?"

She smiled and something in me almost hurt.

"I would love to, Michael."

My name had never sounded so good. I led her out to the dance floor and intended to keep walking until we were at the far end of the room. It was darker there and more private. I tried to steal looks at her as we walked. Her dress was light pink, and it set off her pale skin in an almost inhuman way. It was strapless and I had to restrain myself from running my hand over the skin on her collarbone and shoulder. Her dress flowed behind her as she walked.

I found the spot I wanted, and I turned to face her as I stepped closer. I slowly put my arm around her tiny waist and pulled her in. My eyes closed for a small moment and I took her other hand and held it close between us. As I began slowly swaying to the music, I silently thanked whomever thought up the idea of dancing.

As I held her hand at my chest, I was aware that she would feel my heart pounding, but for some strange reason, I wanted her to know what she was doing to me. I wondered if there was any possible way that her heart was pounding hard for me. Was it really possible that I could be feeling this way and her not feel anything? I searched for any hint in her eyes that she could be affected by me.

"You're from California," she said with a playful smile.

"Is it that obvious?" I said with a tight throat.

"Yes, it is that obvious." She said it gently, with a smile that shone through her golden eyes.

She tilted her head as she asked another question. "Did you spend much of your time near the ocean?"

Thinking of my childhood and how much I loved the beach calmed me down a little. I smiled as I said, "I practically lived on Newport Beach. I was surfing before I could walk." She knew I was exaggerating, but she smiled anyway.

"I grew up near an ocean too. I lived quite close to the beach. It was a little different than Newport Beach, but I loved it so much. I spent my days in the sun and lived to feel the sand on my feet and the salt water on my skin." She paused slightly. "It seems like another lifetime ago."

Hey eyes were far away as she finished. I felt the urge to take care of her. To take away everything that could or ever would hurt her. I also felt a strong need to pull her closer. I obeyed it.

"Where was this beach, did you grow up in California?" I asked a little too eagerly. I wanted to know everything about her.

"No, it wasn't California. I grew up in a seaside town in Russia called Sochi."

I remembered her last name was Ivanov. Very Russian name. I hadn't expected her to say she was from another country.

I frowned in confusion. "You grew up in Russia? You don't have even a hint of an accent."

She nodded knowingly as she said, "I worked very hard to lose my accent. Unfortunately, I still have a lot of family there that I visit rather frequently, and my accent comes back quickly as soon as I step off the plane."

I looked deeply into her face, as I tried to picture her surrounded by a large Russian family as they all quickly spoke a foreign language to each other. I liked the image I created.

A new song began. Her face was close to my neck and I could feel her cold breath on my skin. I felt a strange chill run through me. Then to my great joy, she moved in even closer. I heard a slight groan as she said in a low whisper, "Exactly my brand of heroin."

I stopped swaying to the music and moved my mouth to her ear. "Heroin?" I questioned.

She bowed her head as if she were embarrassed. "I . . . um . . .what . . . I mean is . . . . that you smell truly amazing. Almost mouthwatering."

Her eyes slowly lifted up to meet mine. We stared at each other for a long heavy moment.

The hair on the back of my neck raised. Far down inside me, fighting to be heard, was a voice telling me to be afraid, to leave. It was like a strange instinct that stops a person from turning a dark corner. I clenched my teeth, surprised at the pain I felt from the thought of leaving her. There was definitely a voice. Whether or not I would be able to submit to it was another matter entirely.

I pulled her back closer to me and began dancing again. As I held her, I marveled that five minutes ago I had not even known she existed, yet, now I felt like I had always known her. I wondered how it was possible that she had been on the earth all this time and somehow, I hadn't been aware of her. How could I not have known?

"So, you are the famous Michael Simmons that Bella has been raving about." Her voice was like a bell that could be heard from far in the distance, as it rang through a large valley.

My throat was thick as I answered her. I very much wanted to know what Tanya already knew about me. "Bella has mentioned me?" I asked.

There was a twinkle in her golden eyes as she said, "Much more than mentioned. Bella speaks very highly of you. She considers you one of her closest friends. She thinks you have great talents and abilities that suit you perfectly for the finance world."

I would have to thank Bella later for the glowing appraisal. I didn't seem to have any comment other than to smile. She went on.

"Edward also feels an affinity towards you."

I looked at her quizzically. "An affinity?" I questioned.

She laughed and it was like a wind chime moving in a gentle breeze. "Edward doesn't feel much of any emotion for anyone other than his family, and of course, Bella. So, the fact that he spoke of you in such a kind way, well . . . . I must say that I was intrigued by you and hoped that I would have the chance to meet you."

I grinned. "What could Edward have said that would have intrigued you?" I hoped it was something really good.

She looked warmly into my eyes and said, "Edward told me he would never have been reunited with Bella, were it not for you."

I thought about that last week of drama. The image of Bella crying under her desk flashed through my mind, and how in the conference room, while Bella was away for Thanksgiving, I somehow "told" Edward through my thoughts that Bella was still in love with him.

I remembered Edward staring into Bella's face when the judge pronounced them as married, and thought I would never feel that way about anyone. I was envious that he and Bella were so clearly in love each other. It seemed more a matter of destiny, or fate than just a matter of love. I was so sure that I would never feel it. So sure that I wasn't the type. Now, in a matter of minutes, it was as if my world had changed completely. Like I had been changed in some irrevocable way. A permanent thing.

I felt a charge slowly surging through my body. It was building and I was trying desperately to keep my emotions in check. What if I was making a fool of myself? What if she was feeling absolutely nothing for me? What if I never saw her again after tonight? My stomach was burning with the pain of all the uncertainty. It was a new emotion, this pain. How could I be terrified of losing someone I barely knew?

I tried to answer her comment about Edward and Bella in a way that would give her some hint of what I was feeling. I looked intently into her eyes.

"I believe that Edward and Bella would have found their way back to each other with or without my help. There is clearly no one else for either of them. They were meant to find each other and be together." I looked deeper into her eyes as I said, "I believe that for a lucky few, there is that miracle of finding your destiny, your soul mate. Don't you think so?"

I squeezed her hand slightly tighter than before. There had to be balance between communicating my emotions, and not scaring her away. She looked at me, searching my face for a long moment before she spoke.

"You speak of destiny only in terms of when something good happens, such as falling in love." Her voice fell to just above a whisper as she finished. "Fate can be cruel as well as kind. I have only seen the worst of what fate can do." Her eyes were far away from me. Far, far away. Her chin was set against some invisible foe, as her breath, cold and sweet, breathed out around my face.

What could have happened to her?

I felt a great need to protect her. To shield her from whatever would have made her feel this way. Her eyes were downcast. I had to see her eyes.

I almost stopped myself, but in the end, I couldn't. I let go of her hand and placed my finger under her chin and very gently raised her face up to mine. When she was looking at me again, I ran my fingers over her cheek. It was hard like granite, and so cold. I placed my palm against the side of her face and I watched her close her eyes against the warmth. I pulled her tighter against me as I looked into her eyes and said, "Fate can change."

She looked away, and I watched her breathe in deeply, then let it out slowly in a quiet sigh. When she looked back at me, she seemed slightly calmer. She wore a thin smile on her face, but it looked forced.

I wanted to change the subject, to take us in a different direction than this serious topic we had landed on. It was so strange to have someone else's happiness be a priority for me. I wanted to see her smiling and at peace.

The band continued to play quiet and slow, and I took a deep breath and pulled her back in close to me. I again took her hand and held it close between us and smiled down at her. I wanted to keep her on the dance floor. I didn't want to share her with anyone else. I wanted the conversation to be only between us.

I wanted to know everything about her. I wanted to know about her favorite book, if she had a favorite play, or movie. I wanted to know about her favorite Christmas as a child, and if she had a keepsake that meant the world to her.

I began with easy questions, that would not alarm her to my growing fascination with her. I asked her about her family. I learned she had two sisters whom she lived with, in of all places, Alaska. They lived in a small town called Denali, and I wondered what would make this magnificent person live so far away from civilization. It seemed to me, that she could be anything she wanted to be. I couldn't imagine anyone not being under her spell.

I asked her about her relationship with Edward and his family. She only stated simply that their families had been friends for many years. It was curious to me that Tanya and the Cullens had similar looks. I had assumed they were related. I wondered if perhaps the Cullens had lived in Northern Washington to be closer to Tanya's family.

We talked for the better part of the evening, as we danced alone, far in the shadows away from the crowds. She was warm and open with me and responded to each question with answers that would lead me to ask even more questions. I simply couldn't get enough of her.

She asked me questions too, thought provoking ones, that made me think and ponder on areas of my life in a new way. She challenged me and kept me on my toes and kept me guessing about what she would ask next.

We were silent for a moment, and I studied her. We just danced while I held her and took her in. I had a strange desire to watch her sleep. Just to hold her and keep her safe while she lay in my arms. I swallowed deeply and tried not to think about how I couldn't possibly imagine this perfection was meant for me, yet, not being able to fathom her not being with me, either.

I wondered what she had been like as a child. If she had ever been afraid in the night. If she had been close to her parents, or if she were close to them now. I wanted to meet her family. I laughed to myself as I thought back on how when any of the women I had dated suggested that I meet her family, that had spelled the end of the relationship. They were good for laughs and companionship, but that was it.

"What is so funny?" She asked with a smile.

I looked down with surprise, not aware that I had been laughing out loud. It would not go over well to tell her just how deeply I was already falling for her, or that I wanted to meet her family. I was so worried I would scare her away. I asked what I thought was a harmless question.

"I know about your sisters, but not your parents. Do they live in Denali, too?"

She immediately tensed and I watched her eyebrows pull together as if she were in pain.

"I'm sorry," I said gently. "Did I ask the wrong thing? Did something happen to your parents?"

"They died a long time ago." She answered quickly. Like it was a rehearsed statement that she had told people over and over again. I gripped her hand a little tighter, trying to communicate that I was sorry for her loss.

"I'm sorry, I won't ask you any more questions about them," I said simply.

I looked away from her for a moment, and I saw that the crowd had thinned somewhat. I had no idea what time it was, or how long we had been dancing. I didn't care. I just wanted to keep holding her. I started to wonder what would happen when this night ended. I had to make plans with her. I needed to get her number, find where she was staying. . . be the one to take her home.

I looked back at Tanya and she was staring off to the side with her mouth set in an angry line. I followed her eyes and saw a man standing about 20 feet away. I first noticed his eyes. They were, glowing, is the only way I could describe it. They seemed as if they were a deep red color, but I knew that couldn't be right. He was looking at Tanya with deep disapproval, and I could almost feel his menacing anger. Tanya looked back at my face, but I was still staring at the man. She took my chin and turned it back to face her.

"Who is that man?" I asked with perhaps a little anger. This jealousy thing was new to me. I was surprised at how badly I wanted to keep her with me, and noone else.

"No one important, Michael." She looked right into my eyes, as if to reassure me.

I turned back, and the man was gone. I turned the other way to see where he went, but Tanya took my face again, and gently pulled me to look at her.

"He's gone," she whispered.

I opened my mouth to protest, but she distracted me by wrapping her arms softly around my shoulders. I could feel her cold hands running up my neck. She was curling her fingers through my hair, and soon her fingers were entwined and pulling me closer.

I was dizzy, and breathless. I felt perspiration trickle between my shoulder blades. My head was reeling with thoughts about this woman that were new and so terrifying, and yet, I was so elated, so relieved to be experiencing them. I wanted these feelings. I wanted her.

I wanted her like crazy.

And I knew I would want her the next day, and the next, and the next.

Before I knew what was happening, she took me by the hand and was pulling me off the dance floor. We weaved through the couples and I didn't care where she was taking me. As long as she was holding my hand, I would follow her anywhere.

I then realized that she was leading me to the balcony. We stepped through the doorway and I felt a rush of January night air blow into my face. It felt good. I was way overheated. The cold air also cleared my head a little, and I breathed it in as I squeezed her hand. I was calming down. I was embarrassed that I had been so aggressive in there. I was sure my hands had been all over her. I felt ashamed thinking that she had probably brought me out here to calm me down after I had acted like less than a gentleman.

I was wrong.

She pulled me far into the shadows behind the decorative trees and bushes and yanked me tight against her. I felt a soft moan escape from me as our lips met. Her mouth was like granite. Her lips like ice. She pushed them hard against me and I answered her every time. Her moves were sensuous, yet tender, almost like she was trying not to hurt me.

Kissing her took me to a different place. She was everything. I didn't know it was possible to feel this way about anyone, or anything. I was powerless. I was fearless. I just had to be with her. Holding her.

I grabbed her and gently pressed her up against the wall as I tried to kiss her deeper. At first, she welcomed it, and then she stiffened as she pushed me away. I stared up at her in surprise and I saw what could only be described as terror on her face.

"I'm so sorry," I breathed. "Did I frighten you?" I placed my hand on her cheek, and she closed her eyes and shook her head.

"No," she breathed. "I can't . . . . you are so . . ." She ran her hands swiftly over her face. It was so fast that it startled me. She groaned and said, "You smell so . . . . but it's more than that. . . . it's so much more. . . . ," she whispered.

She all but nailed herself to the wall as she tried to put distance between us. I would have none of it.

"Hey," I said soothingly. "It's okay."

I looked into her eyes. They seemed darker. Her chest was heaving. "Michael," she whispered.

I moved in slowly and laid her head on my chest. I rocked back and forth as I ran my hand softly over her hair.

"Can you hear that?" I murmured quietly.

"Hear what?" She breathed.

"My heart. It's beating, just for you."

I felt a tremble run through her. She grabbed the lapel of my tuxedo jacket and held on tightly. I kissed the top of her head as I continued rocking her slowly.

I was still bewildered. I had kissed other women. A lot of other women. I had held them tightly. I had experienced many passionate moments with the most beautiful women this world had to offer.

Why was this so different?

Why did just holding her like this stir feelings in me deeper than the throes of passion with them?

I hardly knew her. I didn't care. It didn't matter. I couldn't imagine ever holding anyone but her, for, well . . . for forever.

We stayed that way for a long time. I don't have any idea how long it really was. I don't remember hearing the music or seeing anyone else. I don't remember feeling the cold. It was just the two of us. Just us.

At some point, a light snow began to fall. I rubbed her frigid arm and realized she must be freezing in her thin gown. I took off my jacket and laid it over her shoulders as I said, "I better take you back inside. You'll catch your death out here, and that would be unfortunate since I intend to take you to dinner tomorrow night."

When did I get so bold?

Her shoulders fell as she pulled back to look into my face. She stared into my eyes for a moment and then she slowly began shaking her head.

I panicked.

"You don't want to go to dinner with me?" I said softly.

She opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out. She looked away from me and said, "Michael, I can't go to dinner with you tomorrow night."

I tried not to look overeager. It was understandable that she would have plans. I tried to make my voice sound light.

"Oh sure, of course. Is there a chance that we could have lunch together?" That definitely sounded overeager.

Too late now. I moved in and took her hand. I ran my lips over her fingers as I said softly, "I would love to see you tomorrow."

She squeezed my hand for a moment, and then her fingers stiffened as she pulled free from my grip.

"Michael, I . . . . ." She swallowed hard and took a step away from me. She straightened her back and tried to speak.

"Michael, I can't see you again."

I felt all the air escape out of my lungs. My head was shaking hard back and forth and I began speaking before I even realized what I was saying.

"No, no, no. You can't possibly. I know we just met, but I. . . . . but we. . . . . Tanya, why don't you want to see me again?"

It was then that I realized she was already seeing someone. That man inside had something to do with it. She had probably come tonight as a favor to Edward, thinking this would be just a harmless evening in which she was helping out a friend. But I just couldn't see. I couldn't possibly fathom that she had not felt something tonight.

I was not in this alone.

I just couldn't be.

I stepped closer to her and said in a low and forceful voice. "Whatever obstacle, whatever problem is keeping you from seeing me again, I'll fix it. I won't, I _can't_ lose you. I just found you."

She just stared at me shaking her head. Her teeth were clenched and her hands were balled into fists as she spoke again.

"This is a problem you can't fix, Michael. I won't pull you in to my world." I reached for her and she put up her hand to keep me back.

She kissed her fingers and held them to my lips as she whispered. "Tonight was beautiful. Tonight was . . . . a dream. Good-bye, Michael."

I opened my mouth to protest. I closed my eyes for a small moment as I thought of what I could say to convince her to see me the next day. And when I opened my eyes, she was gone. I heard a thud as my tuxedo jacket hit the floor.

I looked wildly from side to side as I screamed her name. I ran from one side of the balcony to the other. For a crazy moment, I thought she must have jumped. There was no way she could have opened the door and escaped so quickly. I looked over the edge and to my relief I saw nothing. I tore through the doorway and began searching everywhere for her. I ran up the stairway and out the entrance, she wasn't there. I ran back into the ballroom and weaved through the dancing couples until I found Edward and Bella.

"Edward," I said breathlessly. "I have got to find Tanya. Did you see where she went?"

He looked at me for a moment in confusion, and then although he tried to hide it, I saw a momentary look of recognition in his eyes. He glanced at the stairway and I followed his gaze. I saw nothing. For a moment his head was down as though he were deep in thought, and then he looked up slowly. His face was a mask but his eyes showed concern.

"Michael, I'm sorry. Tanya is gone."

I was staring at him almost ferociously. Through clenched teeth I said, "What do you mean, _gone_? She was just here. There is no way she could have gotten away from me that quickly. Please, help me find her. Call her right now, please."

He swallowed and looked at Bella. She was staring at me with a mystified look on her face. She turned to Edward and said, "What happened"?

Edward looked back at me slowly and said, "She doesn't want me to call her. She doesn't want you to find her." He had a sympathetic look on his face as he said, "Michael, I don't believe you will ever see her again."

I reeled back from the shock. I stumbled a little and Bella grabbed my arm and held on tightly.

"Simmons, what's going on?" She asked.

I just kept staring at the stairway.

In the span of a few hours I had met a girl.

Somehow, inexplicably, I had been changed by this girl, forever.

I had touched her, smelled her, tasted her.

I had finally, _finally_, found her.

I, Michael Simmons, had fallen irrevocably in love with a girl.

I had fallen for her so hard that I wanted nothing more than just her, for the rest of my life.

Now, she was gone.

**Please, tell me what you think. If you can, explain in detail what you think is, or is not, working in this story. Be brutal if you have to. I can take it! Love you all! See you tomorrow I hope . . . . . . . .**


	20. UNEXPECTED

**I am really appreciating the tough reviews. Don't hold back. I need you guys to push me!**

**Reviews can mess with your head, some say "I love that Simmons had love at first sight for Tanya." Others say, "He moved too fast." Some say, "When is Bella going to be changed, why hasn't she changed yet?" And others are wanting more Edward. We're not even halfway done, so I hope that you will enjoy watching this story unfold! **

**Thanks for being the most awesome readers ever! **

**Chapter 4 -** **UNEXPECTED**

** - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - **

I was understanding Bella a little bit better these days.

Before Edward came back, I used to stare at her sometimes when some boring speaker was droning on in the conference room and she thought no one was watching. Or when we were having one of our late night meetings and I would catch her staring out the window. I wondered what made her eyes look so vacant. I didn't understand why, at times, her face looked so haunted. I honestly thought she had an ulcer the way she would sometimes wince and grab her middle as her arms tightly wrapped around herself. It was almost as if she was trying to stop from breaking in two.

Now, I understood.

"Bella, how did you endure this for seven years?" I was sitting on my couch, elbows on my knees, with my head in my hands.

I felt her hand touch the back of my neck.

It had been a week since Tanya walked in and out of my life. I was still coming to terms that someone I barely knew could have such an effect on me. I felt restless and agitated knowing she was out in the world somewhere and I had no idea where she was. In the middle of a sleepless night I actually cursed Edward for inviting her to the Ball. My life would be perfect right now. I would be gearing up for the Versace runway show and planning to make my move on a Belgian supermodel. I would be up to my ears in work with nothing to take my mind off of it. I would be blissfully ignorant of the fact that a person named Tanya even existed.

I would be ignorant of her cold skin.

I never would have seen her hair.

I never would have felt my arms around her.

I never would have known what it felt like to be with the one person in the world that could make me feel like the most powerful and yet the weakest of men.

That when you were with that one person, there was truly nowhere else you wanted to be.

That all of the sudden forever with someone didn't seem long enough. Now, each minute felt like a tortuous lifetime.

I got up and stared out the window. I had only known her one night. It was ludicrous that I should feel this way.

Bella came and stood beside me.

"You want to know how I handled being apart from Edward for seven years?" Bella answered. "Simmons, you witnessed firsthand how I handled being away from Edward." She looked out the window with a wry smile on her face.

I rested my forehead against the glass and sighed.

"Honestly, Bella. Now that I see it from this side, I think you handled it pretty damn well."

She laughed. "I don't think Peter Graves would agree."

I had to chuckle a little myself. Peter Graves was the high power attorney for Morgan Chemicals. A _former_ business giant that was Number 113 on the Forbes 500 List. Peter was arrogant, and very sure he would have no problem blocking Bella from the acquisition of his client's massive corporation.

I say _former_, because when Bella was through with him, Peter had to move to some little town in Iowa where no one knew him, to start over. She was brutal. She was barbaric and irrational even. She sucked every drop of blood out of him. It would have been nice to let the man keep his dignity, but she wouldn't allow it.

When she was through with Peter Graves, his name was on the front page of all the major newspapers blasting him for the poor job he'd done in defending his billion dollar client. He was laughed at on the morning talk shows, and scorned on the evening news. That all happened shortly before we began searching for Mr. "C". I am pretty sure that Peter Graves' demise was what convinced good ol' Mr. Hathaway to put Bella's name on the building.

Now, looking back, it seemed as though Bella was about to break. It was as if Edward came in the nick of time.

There would be no one to come and save me from this.

"Edward won't be back until tomorrow," Bella said. "Let's go to a movie tonight or something."

"Nah." I mumbled.

Her eyes lit up. "I know. There has got to be a model shoot happening somewhere in this town. Let's go crash a party, or find a runway show. I hear that Gazelle model is in town."

I laughed in spite of myself. Just the thought of Bella crashing a party or having any idea what celebrities were in town was actually quite hilarious. I turned my head to look at her. "You don't have any idea who is in town, and for the last time . . . . her name is Giselle!"

Bella's mouth twisted and she flopped herself back on the recliner. It was still so strange to see her this way. A month ago, I never would have thought I'd see her so relaxed, so at ease. It was like we had traded places.

Edward and his brothers had gone on some backpacking trip in Upstate New York. They had been gone all weekend, and wouldn't be back until tomorrow. I realized somewhere in the crevices of my memory that I had wanted to talk to Bella about starting a firm with her. It seemed a lot longer than seven days ago that we had started that conversation.

It seemed to take a lot of energy to think it through now.

"You know that Edward and I are leaving tomorrow. Are you going to be okay?" Bella sounded concerned.

"Peachy." I retorted.

She sighed hard and said, "Simmons, I know that Tanya had an effect on you, but . . . . ." She swallowed nervously as if she were holding back on something as she said, "Trust me, this is for the best."

I turned and stared at her incredulously. "That was a really stupid thing to say."

"Someone had to say it," she shot back.

I came and stood right in front of her as she sat in the chair. "What do you mean, 'it's for the best'?"

Her eyes darted away from me as she searched for the right words. "I just don't think that you and Tanya would work out."

I had only seen Bella lie once before. It was the morning after she first saw Edward again. She had tried to convince me that she wasn't in love with him. Now I knew why she didn't lie very often. She was terrible at it.

"Now tell me the real reason, Bella."

"The two of you just shouldn't be together, that's all," she stammered.

I folded my arms angrily. "You think she's too good for me, don't you?"

She looked up shocked. "No! That's not it at all!"

I got down in her face and put my hands on each side of the chair. "There's something about Tanya that you're not telling me."

"No there isn't," she said forcefully.

"Is she in trouble? Is that why she left so quickly?" My hands were digging into the arms of the chair.

She shook her head slowly. "No, Simmons. She isn't in any trouble. Just forget I said anything, okay?" She put her hand on my wrist and said, "Calm down."

"Bella, she talked about fate and how it had been cruel to her. She seemed really upset about something, but she wouldn't talk about it."

I straightened up and ran my hand through my hair as I sighed hard.

"Bella, right before she left, she told me she wouldn't pull me into her world." I put my hands back on each side of her chair and said, "If you tell me, I'll do anything I can to help her."

I would do anything. Anything. I just needed to see her again.

Bella sighed hard and looked me right in the face. "Look, I was just trying to cheer you up. I didn't mean anything by what I said. I think you're a great guy, and anyone would be crazy not to see that. I just think that you need to move on and start dating someone else, okay?"

I straightened up and put my hands on my hips. "I recall a certain ice queen practically biting my head off when I helped her get a date with Thomas Vaughn. What if someone had told you to move on when you were pining over your long lost Edward? Do you even want to help me?"

Bella turned her face toward me. I recognized the look she was giving me. It wasn't good.

"What if I'm doing this for your safety? Have you ever considered that?" She shot back. "Maybe I have been thinking of you all along, and don't want to see anything happen to you."

"What in the _hell _are you talking about?" I asked harshly.

Bella backed down. It was as if she knew she'd said too much. "I can't say or do anything about this, Simmons. This is all in Tanya's hands."

I looked at her accusingly. "You've heard from Tanya, haven't you?"

She shook her head slowly. "No, I swear that I haven't."

I didn't want to get in an argument with Bella. That was the last thing I wanted. I drew in a long breath and let it out slowly.

"Bella," I said softly. "I want you to remember back to the first time that you and Edward really connected. The first time he touched you. The first time he held you. I am assuming that was fairly early in your relationship."

Her brow creased and I heard her whisper, "I remember. I will never forget it." She looked up at me and nodded, not really sure where this was going.

"Bella, If Edward had left you right after that amazing first time of showing how you really felt about each other, instead of later on, would it have made his leaving any easier?"

She swallowed hard. "I would have been devastated," she whispered.

Her eyes closed and she shook her head in irritation. "Still, you were only with her for one evening."

I sighed in frustration as I slunk into the couch behind me. "I know, it's ridiculous."

"Whatever happened to a beautiful new girl every few weeks?" She argued.

I leaned my head back against the couch so I wouldn't have to look at her as I spoke. "I don't know how to explain it. As soon as I saw her, I knew something was different. She changed me." I was embarrassed just to say the words.

"Changed you?" She was asking it as a question, but I could tell she knew exactly what I was talking about.

I looked back over at her. "Yeah, Bella. Changed. It was pretty much love at first sight."

"Love at first sight is a pretty rare thing," she said cautiously.

"Then help me get her back." I blurted.

Her shoulders fell, "I don't think I can. I would if I could. I promise I would."

I leaned forward in my chair. "Then make Edward do it."

This time she just stared at me impatiently. "I'll do everything I can, but like I said, Tanya won't answer his calls, and her family doesn't know where she is."

I fell back in the chair despondently. I ran my hands through my hair and muttered, "I know, I know."

She looked at me more gently as she said, "Look, I know at some point she will check in with her sisters, and she is really close to Edward's family. Just give it time. I am not saying that you will get to see her, but I promise I'll let you know when we contact her."

If she did manage to talk to Tanya, I pretty much already knew what Tanya would say_. "So, Edward, thanks for setting me up on a blind date with some obsessive psychopath. I couldn't get out of there fast enough!"_

I winced.

I wasn't sure I wanted to know the answer as to why she sprinted away from me. But still, I hoped there was a chance I would see her again.

"Promise?" I asked pathetically.

"Absolutely," she stated.

That was something at least. A small glimmer of hope. Give it time.

Time.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Seven months later . . . . . . . . . . . .

Another meeting had ended. I stood up and gathered my things.

"That should just about it wrap it up, people. I am going to turn this meeting over to my staff to handle all the details. It has been a pleasure working with you."

I walked out of the conference room and handed my briefcase to my assistant. I turned the corner and quickened my pace as I made my way to Mr. Hathaway's office. He had demanded I inform him the moment I had closed the deal on the merger.

I anxiously checked my watch. It was 10:00 a.m., and my flight for Rome left at 1:00. I had left barely enough time for making my way through traffic to the JFK airport.

I bypassed Hathaway's four secretaries and lightly knocked on his door.

"That you Simmons?" He growled.

I stepped in and said, "Just wanted to report that all went as expected this morning, and as of noon today, you are the proud owner of Lehman Industries."

"Good work, my man." He stepped out from behind his desk and crossed the room to heartily shake my hand.

Hathaway was looking much better these days. Since the dark days after Bella left, he had recovered nicely. He was a little thinner (probably due to his not drinking 6 or 7 scotches a day). His eyes were a lot clearer (definitely due to his drinking less), and his paranoia had subsided somewhat. He had seemed completely relieved when I had told him that Bella had been in town, only to pack up her things and move out of state.

Hans Grunderman had continued to be as abrasive and repugnant as ever. For the first few months I had been forced to work with him on a daily basis. But then a position had opened up in the international market and I had jumped at the chance. Hathaway had seemed all too eager to have me heading up his foreign team.

I usually traveled three weeks out of the month and averaged a new time zone every three or four days. I had seen more of the world than I ever thought I would. I had also transformed the European branch of our operations into a money-making machine. Overall, the last several months had been great for my professional life.

My personal life?

Well . . . . .

I was realist now.

I had kept in touch with Bella for a few months after that night. At first, she would tell me right away that she hadn't heard anything from Tanya, then as the weeks went by, she would call just to say hello, just to "check up on me."

Three months ago I got my first news of Tanya. Bella called and told me that Tanya's sister, Kate had heard from her. Tanya was living in Russia. Kate was upset because Tanya had no immediate plans to go back to Alaska any time soon. I pressed Bella for information and she finally told me that it wasn't normal for Tanya to spend so much time away from her sisters. All that did was make me more concerned for her. There was so much about Tanya that I didn't know.

Correction. There was so much about her that I would _never_ know.

When Bella called, Edward wanted to speak to me. His message was very brief, and very clear. Tanya didn't want to talk to me. She didn't want to see me.

Time had changed my perspective of what had happened that night at the ball. I had convinced myself of the way things really were. That night was no big deal. I'd had a good time, but I was sure that even if Tanya had not run away that night, it would have lasted just a few weeks. She was no one special.

It was a relief when I finally talked myself into that.

What could I have been thinking, right? It was so stupid. I must have been under some serious stress with the paranoid Hathaway and all. Walking the streets of Paris, taking in the seashores of Greece, breathing in the clear air of Sweden reinforced my thinking even more. I was only 25! I had my whole life ahead of me. So many women, so little time.

I tried not to dwell on the fact that since that night I had not dated once. I hadn't even looked at another woman. I hadn't even thought about another woman. After a few months, my phone stopped ringing with calls from former girlfriends. As each one called to tell me they were in town, or to make plans to see me, I would tell them I was no longer interested, that I didn't want to see them again.

One fear outshone all the others. That she would just fade away. That a few years from now, I would realize at the end of the day that I hadn't thought of her. I didn't want other thoughts to come and push in on her. I wasn't going to remember exactly how she looked when I was 75 or 80 years old. I wanted to remember. I wanted to remember what it felt like to have her in my arms. I knew in remembering her, it guaranteed that I would never find anyone else. I didn't care. It hurt to remember, but I couldn't forget. I just couldn't.

Every once in a while I saw someone with a similar nose, or hair that was close to her strawberry blond color. It was never as breathtaking as hers, but close enough to make my teeth clench. Close enough to take me back for one searing second where I could feel her cold breath on me again.

What added to the injury was that I had not talked to Bella since she had called to tell me that Tanya was in Russia. It had been three months. She had completely cut me off.

But, I was fine.

I was moving on.

Things were good.

- - - - -

I had been in Rome for almost a week. I was beat when I returned to my hotel room that night. It had been a tough two days of negotiations, and I wasn't making much progress. Hathaway had wanted this company for months, and I was doing everythig I could think of. Well, almost everything. I knew that if I used some of the tactics that Bella had used that I could have this company, but I just couldn't make myself do it. There had to be a way to do this business and not be just another corporate rat. I doubted that even Bella would use those tactics now. I had faith in myself that I could still be tough, but not vindictive and heartless.

I had just ordered room service when my phone rang.

"Simmons." The growl would have let me know who it was even if I hadn't recognized the phone number.

"Yes, Mr. Hathaway."

"I am having trouble in my Eastern sector, and I need you to go and iron out a few problems for me."

"Of course. But, Mr. Hathaway, I have not been able to close with Barrino-Tech yet. I am meeting with their lawyers tomorrow."

"This is too important, Simmons. Send one of your assistants to that meeting. You're the only one I trust on this."

It wasn't like him to take me off a deal. I gathered this was rather important to him. "Sure thing, when would you like me to leave?"

There was a slight pause and then he said, "I am looking at a memo right now, and you are leaving for Moscow tomorrow at 12:45 p.m."

I felt my chest tightening up. That characteristic hole in my middle that I had become so good at ignoring, began to burn. "Moscow . . . . . you need me in _Russia_?"

"Is that a problem, Simmons?"

I coughed. "No, no. I just uh, haven't really had any dealings with Russia. That was always Conner's assignment. I'm just a little surprised, that's all."

In truth, I had done all I could to make sure that Russia was nowhere near to becoming my responsibility.

Hathaway's voice lowered. "Conner is no longer with the firm. I fired him today and that's why I need you there. He's messed things up pretty badly, and it is going to take a while to get things back on track."

I felt a twitch behind my left eye. "A while?" I managed.

Hathaway let out a large sigh. "Simmons, I need you there long term. This is going to take months to fix. Frankly, we are in danger of losing all our holdings there, and Russia is just too valuable to lose. You're the right man for the job."

I was pinching the bridge of my nose between my fingers, as I spoke. "Mr. Hathaway, I will call you tomorrow night and let you know what I find when I get there."

At least I _sounded _like I was the right man for the job.

"That's my boy," he barked. "I'll be waiting to hear from you." The loud click was all I could hear as I sat frozen on the edge of the bed.

Russia. Damn.

I called up and canceled room service.

**Oooohhhh. Can you review? If you have never reviewed before, let this be your first time! You are all awesome. See ya tomorrow!**


	21. SCARY STORY

**Okay, sorry this is getting out a little late. I had to go and get my car registration done this morning and it took .er. **

**Tanya's new last name is Ivanova! Everyone was calling her Tanya Denali, which is totally lame, and I found a gal who is helping me out with Russian stuff. Thanks Bjelaja (means "white one" in Russian). Ivanov is male, Ivanova is female.**

**Oh my gosh, have you guys seen Jimmy Kimmel's spoof on the New Moon trailer? He used The Count from Sesame Street. Do you remember The Count? He was like, "5 peanut butter sandwiches, Wa Ha Ha." **

**Okay, being serious now. When we left Simmons, he had just been ordered by Hathaway to go to Russia. . . . . . . .**

**Chapter 5 - SCARY STORY**

I sat on the plane and poured over the documents Hathaway's secretary had faxed to me overnight. There was a slight summary of the problems our Russian office was having, but frankly, there were other details about this report that were puzzling to me.

Hathaway said that Conner was doing a poor job, that he had botched things badly, but until three weeks ago, I could see no indication of anything wrong with Conner's performance. In fact, Conner had closed two deals last month. He had kept impeccable records, and he had been meticulous in his day to day operations. But then it had all come to an abrupt stop three weeks ago. According to reports made from others in his office, his behavior changed completely.

All of the sudden, he started coming to work late, and without a word to anyone he would head straight to his office and shut the door. People would hear him on his phone talking in an agitated voice and he wouldn't leave the office unless he had at least three people walk with him. His records became erratic, and there was no rhyme or reason to many of the entries he had in his books. It didn't make sense.

"We will be landing soon, sir. Is there anything else I can get for you?"

I looked up to see the stewardess bending over at the waist smiling down into my face expectantly.

"Uh, no. I'm just fine. Thank you." I was a little preoccupied and annoyed by the interruption.

The woman next to me patted me on the arm. I looked over and saw that she was suppressing a smile.

"That pretty stewardess has walked by you at least 5 times in the last hour and you haven't noticed her once."

I blinked in confusion. "What?"

The woman beside me looked to be about 70 years old or so. She spoke in a Russian accent and her eyes darted up to the stewardess as she spoke to me. "We may all be sitting in the first class section, but she has been giving _you_ more than first class treatment. She is a beautiful girl and yet you haven't even noticed her. She is trying very hard to get your attention."

I looked away from the woman and up at the stewardess. She was talking to a couple seated a few rows in front of us. The woman was right. She was beautiful. I hadn't even noticed. She was nowhere near as beautiful as . . . . I looked down into my lap. That was how it always went now. I compared every woman I saw to Tanya.

"You are in love with someone else." The woman spoke it as a statement, not a question.

"I'm not sure what I am anymore," I said softly. "It has been a long time since I saw her, and I am pretty sure that I will never see her again."

The woman took my hand in hers and said, "I will tell you what my Aunt Yavinka always told me. Love hardly ever comes at the time of our choosing. But when it comes, we must fight for it as if it were a rare jewel."

I swallowed hard as I stared into her wise blue eyes. She was right. I nodded my head and said, "Thank you for your advice."

There was a loud vibration under the plane as the landing gear came down. Then the captain came on the speaker and told us we would be landing soon. I busied myself with packing up my stuff, and did my best to avoid the stewardess.

I walked off the plane and into the busy Sheremetyevo airport. Yeah, try saying that three times fast. I tried not to stand out as I looked around me. I saw signs that should have helped me know which way to go - if I could read Russian. I squinted my eyes as if that would somehow help me understand the unfamiliar symbols that made up the Russian alphabet. It was no use. I might as well have been on a different planet.

I walked up to the counter outside my gate and smiled. I knew just enough Russian to be dangerous. I greeted the woman and tried to tell her that I needed to find the Oksana Hotel, and hopefully someone who spoke English, or Italian, French, German or Swedish. I would take just about any language over Russian. She smiled at me and I hoped that in my feeble attempt at speaking Russian I hadn't just unknowingly asked her to take my red chicken home and beat him with a stapler. I sighed in great relief as she spoke to me in English. She had a very thick accent, but I could still understand her.

She handed me a map and traced out the route I should take. She then showed me how to get out of the airport and out to where the taxis were waiting. She assured me that the taxi driver would accept American money, but that I should exchange my dollars for Rubles as soon as I was able. She handed me the map with a smile and I turned and headed off into a new country in which I was not even able to ask where to find a bathroom.

The drive was fascinating. I saw The Kremlin and St. Basil's Cathedral. The streets in downtown Moscow were very wide. Much wider than in Manhattan. Soon, we turned into the hotel drive. Most of what I knew of Russia came from movies. I expected the hotel to be sort of run down and old, but it was fairly new and quite ornate and beautiful.

According to the clock in my room, it was three o'clock in the afternoon. My watch had two different faces. One always showed American time. My watch said that in America it was 7:00 am. Eight hours earlier. I had no idea what time it really was to my body. I changed into a suit and headed to the Moscow Firm.

When I arrived, I saw a lot of bodies hustling around. That was no different from what I saw in any of the other offices I visited around the world. The young receptionist greeted me warmly. The nameplate on the desk told me her name was Karli. I was surprised to hear her speak perfect English.

"I am from Ohio," she said with a smile. "My father is the American Ambassador here, and I am working while attending Moscow State University."

I was relieved to learn that several of the employees were either European or American. She called up Conner's second in command and he met me at the front desk. This man was definitely Russian. He introduced himself as Vladimir Sokolov. He led me back to Conner's office and we walked in and shut the door.

"It's great to have you here," he said with a sigh. His accent was thick, but understandable.

"Are there any immediate problems I should know about?" I said warily.

He shook his head. "No, not really. Things have just been a little hectic around here for the last few days. Mr. Conner took care of much that I still needed to learn." His smile was large as he said, "I am glad you are here to help us."

I stared at him for a moment. Zachary Conner and I had worked together a little in New York. Bella had actually hired him. I had always known him to be a conscientious man who prided himself in the details. He never left a job unfinished. It was uncharacteristic of him to let things slide and deteriorate to the point of getting fired.

Vladimir spent the rest of the afternoon bringing me up to speed, and then I began working on some situations that needed my attention. It was well past dark when I left the office.

I checked my voice mail and saw that I had missed two calls from my Mom. She didn't even know that I was in Russia. I knew I would have to let her know that I was going to be living here for a while. That little bit of knowledge was going to set her off and create a whole new list of questions for me.

I knew she would be worried about me. She seemed to think that when I was traveling around the world that I was staying in third world accommodations. She always asked me if I had my shots and if I was drinking the water. She didn't think traveling around the world was glamorous at all. I know inside she was wishing that I would just come home and settle down like my brother. I deleted her messages. I would call her, just not tonight. I was already tired enough.

Once I was in the taxi, I called Mr. Hathaway. That was a call I could not put off.

"You were right, Mr. Hathaway," I began. "I am going to need to be here for at least two or three months. I'm just starting to go through the backlog of paper work. It seems like Conner completely stopped doing his job around the end of August. I really don't get it. Did he ever express his unhappiness at being assigned to the Moscow Firm?"

"He wasn't assigned," Hathaway explained. "He requested the Moscow Firm."

"He _requested_ it?"

"He heard a rumor that we were opening a branch in Russia, and he pestered me for half a year to let him run it." Hathaway paused for a moment. "I thought it strange that he wanted to go there after everything that happened with his daughter."

"Conner had a daughter?" I was surprised. I didn't know that he had a family.

Hathaway continued. "He really wanted to keep things quiet. He never even took any time off work. The Board expressed concern, but at that time his performance was flawless. He really threw himself into the job. We authorized his move to Moscow, and for the last 18 months he has been putting up some really remarkable numbers. That's why none of this makes sense."

"What happened with his daughter?"

"She was twenty, I think. She was a student at Northwestern, but she was in Russia attending Moscow State University for an internship. Anyway, she was murdered about a month before she was supposed to come home."

I was shocked. "Murdered?"

"I never knew many details. He didn't talk about it."

It didn't surprise me that he didn't know any of the details. Mr. Hathaway wasn't exactly the type that I would search out to talk about anything personal.

"Mr. Hathaway, do you know how I can reach Conner?"

There was an uncomfortable pause before he answered. "The thing is, the last time I heard from him was a week ago. He hasn't answered any of the firm's calls. One of my assistants tracked down his ex-wife and she can't even find him."

"Conner is missing?" The driver looked back at me in alarm.

"Apparently." Hathaway seemed more angry than alarmed. "We alerted the police three days ago and they haven't been able to tell us anything," he added.

The driver pulled in front of my hotel. I sat stunned, making no move to get out of the car.

"Simmons, you there?" He growled.

"Yeah, yeah I'm here," I mumbled.

"Call me tomorrow and let me know how things are progressing," he barked.

"Sure thing," I said. I was positive he was talking about the firm and its ability to continue being profitable, not about the fact that one of his employees was missing, and perhaps in danger . . . or worse.

I got in my room and lay down in an exhausted heap on the bed. Questions were swirling around me.

Why would Zachary Conner want to come to Russia, the place where his daughter was murdered? Why would his work performance be so great and then in a matter of weeks, have everything fall apart? Did he come here with an ulterior motive to investigate what happened to his daughter? Did he get too close to the answer? Did the same people who hurt his daughter come after him? I shook my head. I had probably watched one too many crime dramas. Still, none of this made sense.

The next morning, I went straight to Karli the receptionist. She and Conner's daughter had been attending Moscow State University at the same time. I wondered if she could give me more information.

"Karli, did you ever hear about what happened to Zachary Conner's daughter?"

For a moment, she looked surprised at my abrupt question, and then she nodded her head sadly. "You mean, Olivia Conner."

She shivered slightly before she finished. "The whole thing was just so unsettling. I still think about it sometimes. I was a Freshman here and it was in all the papers."

I leaned closer. "What happened to her?"

She winced as she said, "Well, she was found just outside her apartment. It was early in the morning and some joggers were just leaving the building. The papers said that she was probably killed somewhere else, and then brought back after she was dead."

That was strange. Usually a killer tried to hide the body rather than make it easy to find. "Go on, please," I urged.

Karli took a deep breath and continued. "The reason the police figured she was killed somewhere else was because there wasn't a trace of blood found anywhere near her body, but she had completely . . . ." she trailed off.

"Completely what?"

Her eyes closed for a moment. "Well, there wasn't a drop of blood left in her body."

I blinked in amazement. "She had no blood left in her body?"

She shook her head. "None at all. And what made it even more strange was that aside from a small cut near her collarbone, there was not a scratch on her. Not a bruise or a broken bone. The papers said that she had been laid carefully at the bottom of the stairway, like the person was sorry for what he had done."

"That's a pretty amazing story," I breathed.

She pushed out a gush of air. "It scared all of us at the University for quite a while. My parents wouldn't let me go anywhere alone. But, eventually, the police figured they knew who did it."

My eyes widened. "They caught her killer?"

Karli shook her head again. "No, they never caught him, but all the fingers pointed to her boyfriend. They were together for about three months. Things got pretty serious. They were almost inseparable, and then after Olivia was found dead, no one ever saw him again."

I agreed, that was pretty suspicious. "Karli, do you know if Mr. Conner investigated Olivia's death while he was working here?"

She nodded her head. "I know he talked to the police regularly. He knew as much as anyone did about the case. I wouldn't say he was obsessed, but he was probably like any parent would be in the same situation, you know?"

"Is there anything else you can tell me about this story?"

She shook her head. "Sorry, Mr. Simmons. That's pretty much all I know."

I thanked her and walked back to my office. I could certainly see why Conner would request to be here. He wouldn't have been able to find out anything when he was half a world away. What a terrible way to lose his daughter, I thought.

For the next two days, I was mired in work. There was so much to be done that I didn't have time to think much about Conner. But the following Monday, two policemen came to the office asking questions. Zachary Conner had been missing for almost two weeks, and now things were becoming more serious. He still had not checked in with anyone. His family was very worried.

The officers wanted to talk to all the employees individually. I insisted that all the questioning take place in my office, and that I was allowed to be there for the interviews. All of them were fairly routine. Besides describing Conner's strange behavior, they had nothing to say.

Until they got to the last interview of the day. Her name was Svetlana.

Svetlana was a short, plump, older woman that was hired by Zachary Conner to be his personal assistant. She didn't talk much to the others in the office, just did what she was told and left around 5:00 every day. She was very efficient at her job. I say that she didn't socialize much with others, but that didn't keep her from being fairly observant.

From the beginning of Conner's days in the office, she saw that he was very involved in the investigation of his daughter, Olivia. He would talk on the phone at least once a day with the men that were in charge of the case. Svetlana thought he was a very nice boss, and a kind man, and that was why she became so worried about him the last month of his employment.

She said that he started acting very nervous, and that she could see him frequently pacing in his office as he spoke on the phone. She heard him once on the phone when he raised his voice saying, "I need protection! I figured out their secret!"

That would have been unsettling enough, but she wasn't done.

One night, about two weeks ago, she was uncharacteristically staying late. She said that Mr. Conner was acting stranger than usual, and she was trying to help him by taking care of unfinished work. She was faxing documents to New York, when she saw three people walk into the lobby and head straight for Conner's office. The front main door had been locked and she had no idea how they had gotten in.

What made it even more disturbing for her, was that even though it was dark, she got a pretty good view of the visitors, and they frightened her. She had a crucifix dangling on a chain around her neck, and while she talked to the detectives, she took a hold of it before she continued. She spoke in broken English, and I leaned forward and concentrated very hard on her words.

"There were two men and one woman," she said. "They were more beautiful than anyone else I ever see. Their skin was so white. They walked like their feet were barely touching ground. When they get closer, I see that they had dark bruises under their eyes, and the color of their eyes was not real, two had red eyes, and one have color of gold."

She told the officers that the three glanced over at her before walking into Conner's office. She was very nervous as she continued relating her story to the policemen.

"Mr. Conner spoke to them in a loud voice. He was very angry man. I know I should have stayed, but I was too afraid. I finish my fax and then I grab my purse and run out of office. I must get home to my son."

She was fingering the crucifix nervously as she finished. "Mr. Conner not come to office the next morning. I never see him again."

I was frozen as I listened to her. She said they were extremely beautiful. She talked about their white skin and their almost unearthly grace. She had mentioned the purplish bruises under their eyes. I could vividly picture the exact gold she was speaking of. I had been haunted by it every night for months. My fingers began to shake.

The men leaned closer to her. This was the most information they had to go on by far. The head officer eagerly licked his lips and said, "You must give us a better description of the three individuals you saw that night."

She began with the two men, and aside from the description she had already given, she did not have much else to tell. One was tall, a little over six feet, and had long dark hair that fell to his shoulders. She reminded them again about his red eyes. The man at the ball flashed in my mind. The other man was more muscular and stocky, with brown hair.

Svetlana explained that they spoke so quietly that she could not describe their voices. She didn't notice any marks on them or outstanding characteristics that would make them stand out in any way. _Oh except for the whole attractiveness and gracefulness thing, _I thought. _And, oh yes, the red and golden eyes._ Wasn't that enough? Couldn't the police just put out an alert that said if they happened to come across any person with gold eyes they should go ahead and bring him or her in for questioning?

I then realized that I was leaning in and sitting even closer than the officers. My hands were gripping the armrests and my teeth were clenched. The officers looked at me suspciously, and I relaxed and slowly sat back in my chair. I forced myself to remain calm as they asked her to describe the woman.

Svetlana's eyes narrowed as she fought for the memory. "The woman, she had very long hair, very pretty. It was a different color." She seemed frustrated that she couldn't think of the right word in English so that I would also understand. She turned to the second officer and spoke in lightning fast Russian. When she finished, he turned to me and spoke slowly.

"She says that the woman's hair was strawberry blond."

An image of how Tanya's hair felt and smelled as it ran through my fingers flashed across my mind. I could feel the heat building under my shirt collar.

Svetlana continued. "Her body was long, graceful. Her face so beautiful. She look right at me as she pass. I never hear her speak."

She relaxed into her chair and said softly, "I sorry, that is all I know."

Both hands were around her crucifix now. She hated being there and having to talk to them. The officers sat back frustrated that they were not able to get better descriptions. She stood up and said, "Please may I go?"

The head detective nodded his head, but stated that he would probably need to speak to her again. Her brow was furrowed as she walked swiftly to the door, but as her hand touched the doorknob, she stopped. Her head snapped up as she took in a quick breath and spoke quietly in Russian.

"Did you remember something else?" The detective asked anxiously.

She turned back around to the men and began speaking rapidly in Russian and the officers put out their hands and asked her to slow down.

"I just remember more," she said breathlessly in her broken English. "I must have been so afraid that I not remember until just this moment."

"Please go on," urged the first dectective.

"When the three go in the room and I hear Mr. Conner yelling, I hear him say, 'How do I know they won't find me', and then I hear him say the pretty girl's name." We all leaned in closer.

"Mr. Conner called her Tanya."

I was staring right at Svetlana, but my eyes were looking far past her. I was frozen in shock. I fought to keep control of myself until the officers were out of the room. If Svetlana or the men said anything else, I didn't hear it. As soon as they left the room, my head went into my hands as I forced air into my lungs.

Was there a chance that this was all a coincidence?

I didn't think so.

What in the hell was Tanya doing here?

Did she do something to Zach Conner?

Was she the bad guy?

All of the sudden, Tanya's words came to me again; "I won't pull you into my world."

Just what kind of world was it? There was something wrong here.

Very wrong.

My body was quaking as new thoughts came to me.

Svetlana had been afraid as she described the three visitors. Their appearance had been strange and upsetting to her.

Had I really been so blind before?

Had I really been so ignorant that I had not noticed that there was something vastly different about Tanya?

No normal person had her kind of grace.

No normal person had her cold, hard, granite skin.

And what about Edward Cullen and his family?

What was really going on here?

Was I really so unintelligent?

I knew why I had not detected anything that night at the ball. I was so wrapped up in what I was feeling for Tanya that nothing could have swayed me from my raging thoughts.

But Edward?

The only explanation I could come up with was that in every context regarding Edward and his family, things had always been in a boardroom. It wasn't until now, that I saw their appearances associated with darker things, that I finally realized the danger.

I felt nauseous. I needed to hear a voice of reason. A voice that would help me see what an idiot I was to even think such nonsense.

_Please_, I begged_, Let it be nonsense_.

I needed answers, and I knew there was only one person who could help me.

I rushed out of the office. I had to be alone and call Bella.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I sat on the edge of my hotel bed staring at the phone in my hand. As I saw it, there were only two outcomes to this phone call.

One, Bella would think I had gone insane, or two, Bella would find out I discovered a secret that seriously, I should have figured out a long time ago. The problem was that I hadn't talked to Bella for over three months.

After the first few weeks of leaving messages and getting nothing in return, I realized that she was blowing me off. I could take a hint. I had tried twice since then, but there was nothing. I wondered if this call would even make a difference.

If she answered, I was worried if mine and Bella's friendship could survive the call. We had been through a lot, that was true. But, this was taking things to a whole new personal level.

Finally, I began to dial the phone. As much as I hated to admit it, there was one argument that kept winning out over all the others. I could find out more of the mystery surrounding Tanya.

It wasn't until after four or five rings that I realized I had no idea what time it was wherever Bella happened to be. If she intended to answer the phone, she would usually do so on the first few rings. If she let it go longer than that, it meant she had no intention of answering. The phone rang for a while then went to her voicemail. I knew it wouldn't do any good, but for the next hour I called her every five minutes with the same results. I decided my last resort was to send a text. If she could just read what I had to say, perhaps it would make her call.

"I have a question about red eyes and golden eyes. Tanya may be in trouble with the police. - Simmons."

About ten seconds later my phone rang.

"Simmons."

I didn't know who this was on the other end, but it wasn't Bella. I wasn't in the mood for games.

"I need to speak to Bella," I demanded.

There was a lengthy pause, a large sigh, and then, "Simmons, it's me."

"It . . . .it doesn't sound like you, Bella."

"I've been a little sick, just getting over a cold."

I didn't believe her for a second. My heart began to pound. The last time I saw Bella, she was normal. As normal as she had ever been. Now, her voice sounded more like Edward's sister. Was her name Alice? Why in the hell would she lie to me? Who ever heard of a cold making your voice sound like a cross between a child's voice and a wind chime? I tried to make my voice sound calm.

"Bella, what's going on?"

"Nothing is going on, Simmons. Everything is just fine." She said it with conviction. High-pitched conviction. The attitude was still there. That was the only way I knew it was her. I knew she could keep up this crap as long as she wanted to. I had seen her do it in the conference room multiple times.

"Look, Bella. You're not going to level with me, I get it. But, for just a moment, I need you to just listen. I'm in Russia. I've been here for a few weeks. I . . . . ."

"You're in Russia?" Bella interrupted me.

"Yes, Bella. I had to take over here because Hathaway fired Zach Conner. He began messing up, big time. And now it turns out, that Conner went missing two weeks ago."

"Missing?"

"Yes, missing. I always wondered why Conner had been so eager to come to Russia. A few days ago I found out why. Last summer his daughter was killed in a bizarre way by someone she knew at the University. Zach became pretty obsessed with finding her killer."

"A secretary here had a very intriguing story to tell, Bella. It seems that one night after everyone but she and Conner had left the office, three very beautiful people came to see him. She said they had very pale skin, and seemed to glide across the floor. She distinctly remembers strange purplish bruises under their eyes and a gold color around the woman's pupils, and red around the men's."

I paused a moment to see if Bella would respond.

Nothing.

I continued.

"The story gets a little stranger, because the night that the three very graceful visitors came to call, was also the last time anyone ever saw Conner."

Here was the question. I swallowed hard and went on. "So, Bella. Is there anything about this story that sounds even vaguely familiar to you?"

She didn't answer.

"Would you like to know how Zach's daughter died?" I pressed.

Still no answer.

I kept talking.

"The receptionist said that she was found right outside her apartment with all the blood drained out of her. They could find no wounds except for a small cut near her collar bone."

She still wasn't talking.

"Bella?"

The silence continued in a very long and frustrating way.

"What's with the new voice, Bella?"

Silence.

If she hung up, I knew I would never hear from her again. As good as the Cullens were about staying secretive, I knew there was no chance of me ever finding her. I remembered how hard it had been to uncover "Mr. C". I couldn't let her just hang up that phone.

"Bella," I began in a much more pathetic voice, "The night Conner disappeared the secretary heard him yelling at someone, she heard him call the woman Tanya. Bella, please. Say you'll help me. What if Tanya is in trouble? What if she is in danger . . . . Bella, are you there?"

Suddenly, there was a new voice on the other end.

"Michael."

"Hello, Edward," I said with relief.

"We'll be there in 24 hours."

My voice caught with surprise. "Great, where can I meet you . . .?"

There was a click and he was gone.

I hung up the phone with guarded satisfaction. There was a chance for answers now. Answers to a lot of things. Including questions that had been plaguing me for months.

**You go Michael Simmons. You are all beyond fantastic. Let me know what you're thinking! See ya tomorrow . . . . . . . . . **


	22. REVELATION

**Hey, thanks for hanging with me in this story. You guys are making this so much fun!**

**I know that Helen of Troy was not a vampire. It was just a cool idea. It will make sense after you read.**

**I won't be able to post until later tomorrow afternoon.**

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Chapter 6 - **REVELATION**

I tried to busy myself with work. It was amost pointless. I glanced at my watch every few minutes, awaiting the arrival of Edward and Bella. Time wasn't moving very quickly. Part of my anxiety came from the way Bella sounded on the phone. There was no way that she could be "physically" changed, but what else could account for the change in her voice? Was it drugs? Were the Cullens part of a cult, and she had officially joined them? What if there was a cult, and Tanya was part of it too? It would make sense, she not wanting to bring me into her world, and that creepy long-haired guy that was staring at us while we danced. There was still one part that didn't make sense.

There was no way Bella would do anything like that. She was way too strong a person to be part of something like a cult.

But what about the fact that I hadn't heard from her in so long? Was she being indoctrinated by the Cullens? What if she really was addicted to drugs? None of this made any sense when I thought of the Bella that _I _knew.

I began thinking about the unsettling fact that Edward was able to read my mind. I felt a chill run though me. There was something dark at work here.

It was 7:00 pm, when I heard a knock on my hotel door. I took a deep breath before I answered. The next thing I knew, I was standing face to face with Edward, and someone who was almost a stranger to me. I sighed hard as I looked at Bella. The words had a hard time coming out.

"I was wondering if the face would match the voice. I guess it does," I said flatly.

Edward looked anxiously from side to side down the hallway.

"May we come in, please?" He said.

I moved over so that they could enter the room. I closed the door behind them, and then dead bolted the door. I had no idea how that was supposed to help. At the moment, I wasn't sure if I was locking me away from danger, or locking me in the same room with it. My blinders concerning Bella and Edward's strange little family were beginning to disappear.

"It's great to see you." Bella said quietly.

I raised my eyes to really look at her. I let out a large gasp.

She looked absolutely breathtaking.

Her skin had that ethereal glow that I had come to recognize, and all her features, had been . . . . .enhanced. Her cheekbones were higher, her eyebrows more full. Her lips were perfectly shaped and slightly pinker than her skin. Her eyes were, not completely golden. There was a tinge of red mixed in, but only slightly, and they were framed by a set of dark thick lashes. Her hair looked darker and shinier, but maybe that was just in relation to the paler skin on her face. She wasn't wearing any make-up. I knew many women from my past that would have killed to look exactly like her. I didn't even want to get started on her body. I remembered Edward's "gift" far too well. I wasn't about to go there.

I swallowed hard and said, "I would say it was great to see you too, if I were actually seeing_ you_ again. This person in front of me is someone quite new, isn't it?" I stared directly into her eyes.

"I'm still the same person." She said with quiet conviction.

Suddenly, I missed Bella. I missed her so much. I knew I would never see her again. The sadness overwhelmed me and embarrassing tears came into the corners of my eyes. I cleared my throat and blinked hard as I ran my hand through my hair.

How could she have changed like this? What could have done this to her? She looked just like Edward and his family. Pale skin, perfect features, and those golden eyes. How did she get those purplish bruises? I didn't even know where to start on all of this. They were both staring at me. I took a deep breath.

"Bella, what is going on?" I asked hesitantly.

They stared at me. Neither had any intention of answering my questions, it was obvious.

"Michael," Edward began, "We just flew here on a non-stop flight from New York. We came here to talk about what you know concerning the way Olivia Conner died, and what you think you know about Tanya. There are no other subjects up for discussion."

I was angry now. I don't care who he thought he was, I didn't expect to be talked to in that way. Edward's eyes narrowed as he looked at me impatiently. I looked at Bella and her eyes were anxious as she stared at me. She took a step towards me.

"We came to help," she said quietly.

My hand ran through my hair as I breathed deeply. I didn't want to give up on finding out what happened to Bella. Was she in danger? I didn't know. But, I finally decided that I must take these battles one at a time. They had come a long way for me, but they could turn around and leave just as easily. My hand rested on my tired neck as I sighed in resignation.

"Thanks for coming so quickly. I didn't expect that," I said roughly.

Edward seemed grateful for the diversion from the obviously changed Bella and jumped right in.

"Tell us everything."

I nodded in surrender. For the moment, I would let it go.

I then told the story in full. Leaving out none of the details, including the part about the fact that it may have been _the _Tanya we knew, who came into the office that night.

When I finished, Bella looked at Edward and didn't say anything. She just stared at him for a moment. Edward looked up at me and said, "I appreciate you bringing this to our attention. You will not need to worry about this anymore. Me and my family will take care of everything."

"Actually," I began, "I do mind, Edward."

His brow furrowed for a moment, and then he threw back his head in disgust.

"You can't honestly still be interested in her?"

"'Interested' doesn't quite cover it, Edward. But I think you already know that."

"It's been months," he said flatly.

I looked at him evenly. "I don't think time is really going to make a difference here."

He shook his head forcefully and said, "You will have no part in this, do you understand."

"I _am_ going to have a part in this. This is the closest I have come to seeing her again."

"She doesn't want to see you, don't you comprehend that?" He was staring at me incredulously.

I fought not to raise my voice. "I have got to talk to her, if only for answers as to why she left the way she did. Am I so repulsive to her that she can't be in the same room with me for just a few minutes?"

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath to calm myself down before I finished.

"Edward, these last months have been . . . ." I saw Edward wince a little as he turned his face away from me. Just in case, I gave him the full force of what I had been enduring, withstanding, suffering through.

I took a step closer to him and said, "Edward, I know she doesn't want me. I am fully aware of that fact. But I _can't_ go the rest of my life not ever seeing her again. I just need to see her one more time. I need to see with my own eyes that she's all right. I need to tell her how I feel. Before I say good-bye to her, I need her to know. I can't go the rest of my life with her not knowing."

I dropped my head. My chest was so heavy. I had been crushing every thought and feeling about her for so long. I had not talked about her with anyone. Now that I had opened the floodgates, it was like every scent, every touch, every sound of her was crowding in and demanding attention. Every memory tumbled in on the next. I had longed for them. I hungrily drank in every memory that I had been craving. I could almost taste her on my lips. I could almost feel the curve of her back. I clenched my teeth as I stumbled back and sat down hard on the bed. My head went into my hands as my fingers entwined painfully into my hair.

I felt a cold, marble hand lay gently on the back of my neck. I looked up to see Bella. She slowly knelt down in front of me. She looked into my eyes. She smiled softly, and for a moment, I saw her. I saw the Bella I remembered.

She turned to Edward and I heard him softly sigh. She looked back at me and she winked and smiled. She nodded her head as she put her frigid hands on each side of my face.

"Really?" I breathed.

"Yes," she whispered.

I put my hands over hers.

"Thank you." It was all I could say.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I tried to get answers from Bella as to what had happened to her. Edward would have none of it. They left shortly after the conversation concerning Tanya had ended, and I was left sitting in my silent hotel room.

I was weary, but I didn't make any effort to get ready for bed. There were way, way too many questions swirling in my head.

Was it any of my business to ask Bella what was going on? And what would happen when I saw Tanya again and had to say good-bye to her? These last months I had been driven by the chance of seeing her again someday. What would I do with myself when this was all over?

I knew sleep was not coming any time soon. I grabbed my laptop with the intention of getting some work done. I needed some background information about the current political climate in Estonia, and if their government would be open to a visit from me. Hathaway wanted to buy some office space there, and eventually make connections in that country.

I went to Google, but instead of typing in the key words for the information I needed, I stared at the screen for a moment as a new thought came to me.

Tanya and Bella both looked very similar now. The more I found out about Bella, the more I would also find out about Tanya.

I put in a few key words, not quite knowing where to start. I typed: pale, cold, hard skin.

A list of over 30,000 entries appeared on the screen. It was nothing but medical journals. Apparently the words I typed were the symptoms of many illnesses ranging from cancer to anemia. I added the words, golden eyes and graceful.

Then the information changed.

"For centuries, legends have given accounts of the pale, cold visitors that wreaked havoc on towns and villages that dotted the landscapes of Medieval Europe. . . . . ."

I read the next one.

"Their pale skin and grace were designed to lure in their prey. Sightings have been recorded since the days of Charlemagne and Alexander the Great. Their cold skin served as a warning, though few have ever lived to tell the tale of the horror depicted by an attack of . . . . "

An attack of what? I wondered. I clicked on the site and was met by a graphic portrait depicting an ancient scene of blood and gore. I focused on the text and began to read.

"Their cold skin served as a warning, though few have ever lived to tell the tale of the horror depicted by an attack of an angry coven of vampires."

_Vampires_? I scoffed. That was definitely not what I was expecting. _Get serious, _I thought.

I went back to the list and scrolled down until another one caught my eye.

"Her sensual beauty and grace led many to believe that she was a gift from the Greek Gods. Her pale, granite-like skin and unearthly beauty was said to be irresistible . . . ." I clicked to read on, my heart pounding.

'There is a tale relating the story of Zeus giving a beautiful creature as a gift to the mighty warrior Achilles for his bravery and success on the battlefield.

Helen of Troy was said to be the most beautiful woman that ever lived, but there is a question as to whether she was in truth a woman, or a supernatural creature that spurred a war that lasted for centuries.

Achilles instantly fell in love with the woman that was said to have beauty unsurpassed through all the chronicles of time. Her passion and strength were said to be greater than that of the great Achilles.

Helen of Troy was described as having long black hair, pale skin, and eyes of fire. Historians have interpreted this to mean different things. Some legends say that her eyes were like red flames that danced in the night.

An interesting legend claims that Achilles was captivated by her scent. She breathed in his face with her cold, intoxicating aroma and he was so entranced by her that he went to war for her. A war that would take him to his death.

Historians have long debated as to what the true nature of Helen of Troy actually was. Some say she was a Sprite sent to torment Achilles, much as the Sprite in Shakespheare's "The Tempest". Others say it was an evil spirit sent by the God of the Underworld, Hades. But there are some that believe that it was neither. A growing number of historians are beginning to speculate that she was indeed the most mystical of all creatures, the immortal creature known as the vampire.'

The article had described Tanya perfectly. The effect on Achilles was not far different than my own. But a vampire? There had to be a plausible explanation. Not this ridiculous business of legend.

I remembered Edward and Emmett, and how they carried all of Bella's furniture out of her apartment in a matter of minutes. I added "excessive strength" to the search.

A whole new list of explicit, ghastly tales about vampires jumped on the screen.

Everything I read only confirmed my worst fears.

Each site kept coming back to the same conclusion. Picture after picture, article after article. The horror of the realization was slowly seeping in.

Each time I saw the word vampire, it was like a stake through my heart.

The rest of the night was a blur.

When the sun came shining through my curtains, I had a long list of what I had found.

Pale, cold, hard skin was the universal signature of a vampire. Most vampires had red eyes, a result of drinking the blood of their victims. There were, however, a select few that chose to live a higher law. They drank the blood of animals rather than humans, which gave their eyes a distinctive golden hue.

All vampires had the strange purplish bruises under their eyes.

They were extraordinarily beautiful. It was believed that their unearthly beauty was designed to lure in their prey.

They were exceptionally strong. They were strongest when they were young, but any vampire's strength would far surpass that of a human.

Some vampires had gifts that even transcended those of their kind. There were accounts of vampires foreseeing the future, and influencing others to do their bidding. There were even accounts of mind reading capabilities.

They were immortal. They were extremely hard to kill. Many of the same vampires that had been here when the Attila the Hun stormed China were still on the earth today.

Into my mind flashed the image of Olivia Conner. Dead. All the blood drained from her body.

I could feel my body quaking. I told myself it was from lack of sleep and food. I went to the window and looked out at the city. Taxis and cars were just starting to appear on the street as the usual hustle and bustle of the day was beginning. People were hurrying along the sidewalk. Soon, children would be in school. This day, for many, would be just like the day before.

But not for me.

I doubted anything for me would be quite the same again. I closed my eyes and shook my head at the realization that this could really be true.

Edward Cullen was a vampire. He had been a vampire all this time.

Bella.

I swallowed hard. There was an acrid, foul taste in the back of my throat. She was human when I knew her, but she had been hiding a secret. A big secret. She knew that Edward and his family were vampires. Yet somehow, she had fallen in love with Edward. I was sure that his little "abnormality" was the reason he had left her, the reason he had stayed away for seven years. But now . . . .

Bella was a vampire. Unbelievably, Bella had become a vampire.

"What the hell!" I shouted.

I started pacing the room, my thoughts were coming to a conclusion that I so wanted to avoid. I tried to elude it. To shun it. If I didn't actually form the complete thought in my head, then it wouldn't really ever be true. But, I knew it. Even through all my fast pacing, I knew it.

Tanya was a vampire, too.

At exactly what point did my life begin to mirror a supernatural science fiction horror movie?

I sat down in an exhausted heap on my bed. I stared out at nothing. Eventually, I began to see things as they really were.

There had never been anything between Tanya and me.

She lured me in just like she had so many others. Her scent, her beauty, her touch.

Her breathlessness had come not from her attraction to _me_, but to my blood. She had wanted to suck my blood, to kill me right there on the balcony. That's why she ran away so fast. The comment she made when she pulled away from our kiss about how good I smelled, finally made sense.

I laughed darkly as I thought of how I had fantasized about rescuing her from whatever was keeping us apart. About how when she saw me again she would run and fall into my arms. I had played out the scene in my mind of how I would hold her tightly against me and tell her everything would be all right.

"Idiot." I whispered to myself.

I felt weariness begin to seep through me. At first I fought it. I had decisions to make. Bella and Edward would be on their way over soon. But I was so tired. Tired of everything. Tired of missing her. Tired of dreaming of her. Tired of building a future that included her.

I was done.

I had imagined many things that Tanya could be, but not this.

She was in a world where I couldn't follow.

A vampire.

A damn vampire.

I felt my eyelids get heavy. I fought to keep them open, but apparently there was no fight left in me. I was finished.

It was over.

**Oh, Micheal . . . I feel so bad for you. Please tell me what you thought of Simmons' process of figuring this out. I need to know if it worked. Thanks! **


	23. GOODBYE

**This is the shortest chapter I have ever written. It's not quite 3,000 words. It's Sunday, right? So, we're all a little more mellow.**

**Thanks for the great reviews. I laughed at how we all saw the the internet was extremely "helpful". It would be amazing if we were really able to get all that from the internet. Maybe we should all ask where is Edward Cullen, one of us is bound to get an answer, right?**

**A little while after I started this story, this song came out. It fits so well. It was exactly what I was thinking about Simmons. Is it weird that two songs came out called LOST, at just the right time and inspired me? . . . .**

**CHAPTER 7 - GOOD-BYE**

Just because I'm losing, doesn't mean I'm Lost.

Doesn't mean I'll stop,

Doesn't mean I wear a cross.

-

Just because I'm hurting,

Doesn't mean I'm hurt.

Doesn't mean I didn't get what I deserve,

No better and no worse.

-

I just got LOST.

Every river that I tried to cross,

And every door that I tried was locked.

I'm just waiting 'til the shine wears off.

-

You might be a big fish in a little pond.

Doesn't mean you've won,

Cause there'll only come a bigger one.

-

And you'll be LOST.

Every river that you try to cross.

Every gun you ever held went off

And I'm just waiting 'til the firing starts.

-

I'm just waiting 'til the shine wears off.

- LOST, Coldplay

- - - - - - - - - -

I felt a nudging. It was pulling me out of some strange murky world where ghostlike creatures with golden eyes kept whirling around me. In my hands I held a strange heavy object, that I only realized after I awoke was a crucifix.

I blinked the sleep from my eyes and saw Bella standing there.

"Hey," she said simply.

"What time is it?" I questioned.

"A little after 10:00 in the morning."

It shocked me again to hear that high-pitched bell sound coming from her.

I sat up slowly and groaned. "Bella, I'm sorry you had to come all the way over here. I should have called and saved you the trip."

"I called you three times, but there was no answer." She explained.

I looked at my phone on the nightstand. It was only two feet from where my head had been.

"I must have been pretty out of it," I said thickly.

I had fallen asleep on top of the bed and was still in yesterday's clothes. Even my shoes were still on. I took a deep breath and let my head fall into my hands as I sat on the edge of the bed.

"Rough night?"

I laughed darkly. "Yeah, pretty much."

"Is something wrong?" She asked hesitantly.

I yawned hard. "Nothing a night club and a few super models can't fix."

"What are you talking about?" Bella didn't like being left guessing, that much I remembered.

I scratched the back of my neck and stretched my back.

"Well, Bella, I've been thinking and I changed my mind about getting involved with this whole thing. I'm just going to let you and Edward handle it." I slowly raised my eyes to look at her.

She blinked in surprise. "Why the sudden change? Last night you were so adamant that you be a part of this?"

I had to swallow again. My chest and throat felt so tight. "Last night after you left, I uh, did a little investigating of my own."

She looked down at me with a confused look on her face. I stood up slowly and without meeting her gaze walked over to the window. After staring out at the city for a moment, I turned again and spoke softly.

"You know Bella, I knew there had to be some difficulty surrounding Tanya. I knew that there would be some hurdles I would have to cross to get to her again. But, the scenarios I had in my head were quite different from the actual truth. I thought maybe she was a jewel thief, part of witness protection, maybe a spy, or on the run from a jealous boyfriend. These were things I could deal with."

"What do you mean by the truth?" Her voice was flat and the anxiety on her face was easy to read.

I looked straight into her pink-stained golden eyes. "Apparently, Bella, I draw the line at vampires."

I saw her body stiffen. Her lips got tight and she swallowed hard. I watched as at first she planned to dispute my findings. She wanted to tell me I was wrong, but in the end she let out a large sigh. It seemed to me that she seemed relieved that I knew. It was actually a pleasant surprise to see that even now, after she had changed so much that I could still read her so well.

"You know Bella, back when we were together at the firm, you always told me I was the best guy you had for research; no secrets could stay out of my reach for long."

She stared at me with those eyes that I no longer knew. "It looks like you learned my greatest secret," she whispered.

I wanted to say it was a truth I wished I'd never learned. Instead, I smiled at her sadly. "Yeah," I breathed.

She took a small step toward me. "You seem sad. Simmons, don't be sad for me. This is all I've ever wanted."

I raised my eyebrow and looked at her doubtfully. "No one could want this," I said as I gestured to her.

Bella's eyes seemed to turn darker as she looked at me intensely.

"I was sixteen when I met Edward. From the first moment I saw him, there has been no one else. You saw me before, how I was. I was dead _then_, not now. I have my only love by my side forever. I will never want for anything else."

"You _chose_ this?" I asked incredulously. "I thought for sure Edward pushed this on you until the choice wasn't yours to make," I spat.

She slowly shook her head as she smiled at me serenely. "I begged him to change me so many times. That's why he left for so long. He didn't want this for me. He finally realized that it was destiny for me to be by his side. It was probably the hardest thing he's ever done."

I shifted my feet and ran my fingers through my hair. I felt completely baffled at this "person" in front of me. All this talk about "forever" and "destiny" was making me uncomfortable. I had never heard her talk like this before and it reminded me too much of what I hoped I'd found in Tanya. I attempted to lighten the heavy conversation.

"So, I shouldn't challenge Edward to a duel and fight him to the death for taking my best friend and turning her into a vampire?"

It worked. She laughed. It just wasn't the laugh I remembered.

"No," she said. "Please understand, I am happier than I ever thought I could be."

She did look pretty happy. In an undying, indestructible, cold-skinned sort of way. But I didn't understand it. I would never, never understand loving someone so much that you would change your very immortality for them. It didn't make any sense.

"You act like this is the perfect scenario," I argued. "You must have given up a lot to be with him."

"Every choice comes with another road not taken," she replied.

My face twisted. "Ah, don't give me that crap, Bella. This isn't just another road. You walked away from being _human_. From having children. I'm guessing you also walked away from your family and close friends." I looked right into her eyes. "Bella, do you realize what you've done?"

She squared her shoulders and stared me down. "I know what I can't live without. I made this choice with my eyes wide open."

I scoffed at her and said, "What about drinking human blood? Have you ever done that? Have you ever killed anyone to be with your 'true love'?"

She nodded her head slowly and calmly. "I will never do that. Edward and his whole family only drink the blood of animals, never humans."

This was a no win argument. I looked off into nothing and shook my head at the lunacy of this conversation.

"I do have a question for you," I replied.

"Go ahead."

"That one day in the conference room when you wanted to trick Edward into thinking about something else so that you could buy up the majority of the shares to his company."

"Yes," she prompted me to go on.

I sighed hard and said, "One of the things you made me say was 'I hope Edward never finds out that Jacob is a werewolf'. Bella, please tell me that isn't true."

She bit her lip and looked at me nervously. "Actually . . ."

I threw my hands up in amazement. "Oh, come on!"

She just began to laugh.

"How can you laugh about this?" I raged.

"I know how I felt the first time I learned the truth about all this. I was in shock and amazement just like you." She put her frigid, rock hard hand on my arm. "I understand you feeling this way. _Trust me_. You are handling everything like a normal person should. I never did. Edward was always so angry that I accepted everything about him so easily." She laughed and pointed at me. "You're the normal one."

I sneered at her. "Yeah, I am so normal that I have been in love with a vampire for the past year."

She just gripped my arm tighter and whispered, "Sorry."

I despairingly rubbed my bleary eyes.

"You didn't sleep well last night?" She asked.

I chuckled a little as I shook my head.

"Yeah, neither did I." She said with a small smile.

I looked up at her with one eyebrow raised. Somewhere around 3:00 a.m. I remembered reading about the fact that vampires didn't sleep. At any rate, I didn't find her joke very funny.

"Be patient with me, Bella. I'm a little new to vampire humor."

She laughed for a moment, and then she got serious. She swallowed hard as she took a step closer to me. "There's . . . . there's some things that I need to say to you."

I took a deep breath. "Go ahead, I'm ready."

She smiled slightly, and said, "I just wanted to say thank you for always being there for me. Thank you for seeing past my hard exterior when I was your boss, and for being my friend. Thank you for helping me through that horrible time when I had to see Edward in that conference room everyday. You really held me together. And thank you for telling Edward that I really did love him. I owe you so much."

I cocked my head to the side. "Bella, you act like you're saying good-bye."

She looked like she was about to cry, but no tears came out. That was a switch.

"I am . . . . . I am saying good-bye," she finally managed.

I stared at her in shock. "Why would you be saying good-bye to me?" I blurted out.

She started speaking so quickly, it was hard to keep up. "It's not my choice. There are . . ." She paused as if searching for the right word. "There are beings, very powerful beings that would demand your death, or immediate changing if they knew you were aware of our secret. The only reason Edward and I came here was because we were afraid you would go digging and asking questions where you shouldn't. We came to stop you from doing that."

She shook her head forcefully. "I won't put you in any more danger. After all that you've done for me, that is the least I can do for you."

I moved so I was standing right in front of her. "If you think I'm going to go around telling people about all of this, you are gravely mistaken. They'd throw me in the loony bin, for starters."

"Simmons, listen to me. This is absolutely serious. They have a great deal of anxiety about any human knowing their secret. You can imagine, can't you, as to just why this is such a hard and fast rule for them? They are not just concerned about the chance that you will tell anyone. They are just as concerned about the fact that _you_ personally know about us. They do not allow any human to know the truth, and live."

I tried to imagine a vampire-like CIA scouring the world sucking the blood of anyone who learned their secret.

"Even Edward wouldn't be able to stop them," she breathed.

That didn't sound appealing to me at all. But still, this was Bella. Did everything have to be taken away me?

"I swear I will never tell anyone your secret, but can't you . . . . what if . . . . . isn't there any way that you can contact me? Just once in a while so I know you're okay? I had my hands on her shoulders. They were rock solid.

She breathed in deeply and looked at me sadly. "For now, can I just say that I'll try? I won't make any promises. I want you to be safe. That is the most important thing to me."

I stared at her dismally. "I bet you have had to say good-bye to a lot of people that were important to you lately."

"I am happy. This is what I want." She said it forcefully.

I believed her.

"Try as hard as you can to contact me," I begged.

She put her frigid hand on my face. "I promise."

I gathered her in a hug. I will never be able to describe what it was like to hold Bella close to me, and have the memory of holding Tanya crash so vividly into my mind.

Her coldness.

Her scent. Almost the same, but not quite like Tanya's.

Her granite-like skin that almost made me want to whisper Tanya's name.

How much harder now. To know that saying good-bye to Bella also meant saying good-bye to any chance of ever seeing Tanya again. I silently berated myself. Even when I knew I could never have her, apparently I had still been holding out hope that I would somehow, someday see her again.

It was almost as if Bella had been reading my mind.

"Are you sure you don't want any part of helping me and Edward today?"

"I'm sure," I muttered into her hair. It seemed to be the most human part of her.

We slowly let go of each other. She began walking to the door.

"You know," I said. "It's going to bug me like hell if I see you when I'm like 82 years old, and you still look as stunning as you do right now."

She stopped at the door and turned to me.

"Listen to me, Simmons. You are going to have a wonderful life. You are going to find a great girl, you're going to have a family, and be happy. You are gifted in so many ways. You are going to have a great career in anything you choose. You're only 26 years old. Go and live the life you were meant to live."

"I love you, Bella," I stammered.

"I love you, too."

Then she was out the door.

I stood there until I heard the elevator door close.

I slowly let the air flow out of me. My eyes closed as my head fell.

"Good-bye, Tanya," I whispered.

- - -

**I know this is a short chapter, and not a lot of action, but I would love to hear what you thought of Bella and Simmon's conversation. See ya tomorrow!**


	24. BEYOND A SHADOW OF A DOUBT

**Yesterday's reviews were among the most thoughtful, challenging, and entertaining reviews I have received for any story, ever. You guys are amazing. You are inspiring me, do you understand that? After I hear your reviews, it sparks an idea in my head and I go to the upcoming chapters and change a word, or the way a sentence in written all because you guys are so fantastic. I never expected this, especially from yesterday's short chapter. If you have time, read my reviews. They are beyond any expectations.**

**The best people in the world are reading my story!**

**If I haven't said it before, all the locations in L2 are real. I may move them around slightly for convenience in the story, but they are real.**

**This chapter is quite long . . . . .**

**Chapter 8 - BEYOND A SHADOW OF A DOUBT**

**- - - - - - - - - - - - **

This newfound capitalism had been good to Russia. I shifted down in my 1966 black Jaguar XJ13 V12 as I wound my way up the highway that snaked through the Caucasus Mountains. Now that Russia had free trade with foreign automakers, they were also trading in classic cars as well.

I hadn't owned a car since College. After getting the job at Berkshire-Hathaway, I got rid of my 1995 Honda Civic. There was no reason for me to own a car when I lived in Manhattan, and now that I was working internationally and hitting a new country every few days, there was even less of a reason to own a car. But, since being transferred to Moscow, I had grown tired of a driver taking me everywhere I wanted to go. I wanted freedom. Plus, I walked by the dealership the day after Bella had said good-bye, and well, the rest as they say, is history.

It had been a month since Bella left, and I had buried myself in work. It was the only thing that kept me sane. If I allowed myself free time, my mind began to think about things that I simply wanted to put behind me. For now, it was better for me to lock it all away. At some point I knew I would have to deal with it, but I hoped that when that time came, the pain would be lessened enough that I could make it through to the other side of it.

It seemed like I was just starting to relax a little. Like I was able to exhale and still keep it together. Then, a few days ago, I received a text:

"We have not been able to locate Tanya, but we do know that she is safe. Good luck in everything, I wish you happiness. Delete this message after you read it. "B"

I read it over and over several times. As soon as I deleted the message, I immediately called up Mr. Hathaway and told him I would be out of the office for a while.

It was a clear spring day, and I contemplated putting the top down. I decided against it, at least for the time being. The temperature was bound to drop as I reached the summit. The travel agent told me that there would be snow on the mountain peaks for at least another month.

The farther away I got from Moscow, the more I happy I was with my decision to take a week off. I hadn't taken a day off in over a year. I definitely needed it.

The plan was to stay at a seaside hotel in a town called Batumi. It was in the country of Georgia, just under Russia. I needed to get out of Russia for just a little while. It was a full day's drive. At least that was what the travel agent said. I figured at the speed I was driving, it wouldn't take me anywhere near that long.

Luckily, I had satellite radio. Russian radio stations were still a mystery to me. They talked way too fast for me to understand, and the music was not my taste at all. I found a classic rock station broadcasting out of Cleveland, and I sang along as I hugged the corners of the mountain. This was the best day I'd had in a while.

After an hour or so, I began my descent down the other side of the mountain range. Soon, the road began to level out and the landscape changed to rolling hills. I relaxed into my seat as I watched the tall grass along the road fly by. Without anything pressing on my brain, my mind began to wander.

Within a few minutes, I was thinking about Zachary Conner. It had been months and he was still missing. And what about Olivia? A picture of her dead body at the bottom of the stairway flashed through my mind. Friends said that she and her boyfriend had been pretty serious. Was her boyfriend the vampire? Maybe this vampire killed her boyfriend too, but his body just hadn't been discovered yet. Was this something this vampire had done before? Were there more victims around the city that I didn't know about? It would always haunt me what part Tanya played in the whole thing.

I had a new strategy where Tanya was concerned. I knew it was childish, and even though I knew Tanya didn't have them, I would imagine her with fangs. I would picture blood dripping off her fangs, and a fresh kill at her feet. I would then say over and over that Tanya was a vampire. When I was with her at the ball, her eyes were golden, and I hoped for her sake that they still were. I hoped that she had not harmed Zach Conner. But, picturing her with bloody fangs made it easier for me in my weak moments to fight off my feelings for her. It was harder than I ever imagined it would be, even with all I knew.

My phone rang. I sighed hard and checked the I.D. Even though I was officially on vacation, Hathaway insisted that he be able to reach me at all times. I hadn't even been gone a day, and already I was getting calls from him. But after I saw the number, I groaned even louder. It was my mom. If I didn't answer, she would just keep calling until I did. That much I knew.

"Hey, Mom," I answered cheerfully.

"Michael dear, it's so good to hear your voice. How are you doing?"

"I'm just great, Mom."

"You sound like you're in a car, are you going somewhere?"

"Yes, I actually just left for a week's vacation."

"A whole week? Why didn't you come home and visit us?"

My face twisted into a grimace. I knew better than to tell her I was on vacation.

"Mr. Hathaway wouldn't let me get that far away from my assignment in Moscow. I am only heading to a place a few hundred miles away. Otherwise, I would love to see you. It's been a long time."

"It's been three years, dear."

"You're right, I'm sorry. As soon as I finish this assignment, I will be home for a visit. How is Steven?" I was trying to get the conversation off me and on to my brother instead.

"Oh, he's wonderful. His practice is going so well, and you wouldn't even recognize his children. They have grown up so much." I was trying to remember his kid's names. Sally and Bobby? No, that couldn't be right.

"Michael, I have been worried about you, I haven't heard from you for two weeks. How are things with this Tanya woman you told me about?"

Once, back when I thought for sure I was going to see her again, I had mentioned Tanya's name. Even after all that had happened, I had never told my mom that things were over. It was just easier for me to have my mom think I was seeing someone exclusively. She certainly didn't approve of me going to runway shows for my dates. But, now was the time to end it. End what had never really started.

"We broke up, Mom."

"Oh dear. I'm so sorry to hear that. I hoped that you were about to settle down."

The road curved and went behind a large hill. The phone began to cut out. I slowed down so that I could stay behind the hill as long as possible.

"Uh, I think we're losing reception. I'll call you later, Mom."

I couldn't hear anything on my end and I gratefully hung up the phone. I let out a long breath and tossed the phone into the other seat. I loved my mom, but there just didn't seem to be a safe subject for us to talk about right now.

I had turned up the stereo and was on to a much brighter topic, thinking about how much I missed the Deli markets in New York. I had not found anyplace in Moscow that could load up a sandwich with toasted rye bread, mounds of pastrami, and a thick slice of swiss cheese the way that Carnegie Deli could. I was imagining the French Dip sandwich on a hoagie bun when a road sign caught my attention. "Sochi, 85 miles."

My heart pounded at just seeing those words. Sochi was the town that Tanya had grown up in. It was a detail that I had not forgotten. It wasn't hard to remember. It was one of the only things she had told me about herself, in our one and only conversation.

The sign for the turn-off to Sochi was a mile ahead of me. I had about thirty seconds to make up my mind. Before I knew what was really happening, my plans had changed. I was heading for Sochi.

"Idiot." I said to myself.

This was just going to be a slight detour, I reasoned. I was just seeing the country. From what Tanya had said, Sochi was a seaside town. That was something I was definitely interested in. No harm done. This was just a slight detour. I would be back on the right road to my destination in a few hours. And even though this was farther away than I planned, with the time I saved with my lovely new fast car, I would still get to my hotel before nightfall.

I was great at rationalizing.

The closer I got to Sochi, the more beautiful the landscape became. Dark green rolling hills were all around me. Spring flowers in a rainbow of colors dotted the grass. With twenty miles to go, I put the top down on the convertible. It was a little cool, but I didn't care. I breathed in deeply and smiled. The air had that salty taste to it that I loved. I turned my face up to the sunlight and drank in the warmth on my face. I sang out with the radio, "Stairway To Heaven" at the top of my lungs. This was definitely one the best days I'd had in a long time.

Like many of the towns that dotted the Black Sea, Sochi was a port city, but it was bigger than I expected. From what I gathered from the billboards, it was a big resort town. "Russia's Biggest Summer Resort Destination" one sign said. I could see a lot of stores that were closing out their skis and winter stuff, so apparently it was a winter destination too. Not a bad place to live, I thought.

As I got closer to the Sea, I expected to see a lot of people in the water. But, I soon realized this was not quite like Newport Beach.

There was no long stretch of sand, just black rocks that went clear out to meet the small waves. There were a few people walking down through the rocks, and a few had their feet in the water, but it looked cold. I parked my car and grabbed a light jacket as I headed down to the water.

No matter what form it came in, I loved the water. I remember as a kid hurrying as fast as I could to get my chores done so I could tear out the back door with my surfboard in my hand and literally not come out of the water until it was too dark to see.

I took off my shoes and socks and stepped into the wet sand at the water's edge. A wave pushed over the top of my feet, and just as I suspected, the water was pretty cold. I started walking down the beach, letting my feet sink into the wet sand. I had no destination in mind, just to walk. There was a light breeze with seagulls flying overhead, and a lot of other birds that were unfamiliar to me. About 100 yards from where I started, I saw a large rock jutting out from the hillside. I put my shoes back on and began picking my way through the pebbles and debris until I perched myself on top of the rock.

It was beautiful here. Different than _my_ experience with the water, but a picturesque view all the same. I thought about Tanya. I knew I would. Her words about this place played in my mind. I had memorized our conversation. I recalled her exact words:

"I grew up near an ocean too. I lived quite close to the beach. It was a little different than Newport Beach, but I loved it so much. I spent my days in the sun and lived to feel the sand on my feet and the salt water on my skin."

In the weeks just following my one and only night with Tanya, I had kept having a recurring fantasy. I saw a beautiful little girl, with hair the same color as Tanya's. She was running along Newport Beach and we were chasing her, laughing and splashing. She was my daughter, and Tanya was my wife. I imagined catching the beautiful little girl and swinging her around with Tanya right there beside me, smiling. Of all the dreams I had, that one was the hardest to let go of.

But now, I pictured Tanya as a little girl. I imagined her with that same long hair as she ran and laughed down the beach. She had been so sad and almost wistful as she spoke of this place. At the time, I had wondered what had happened to make her so nostalgic and melancholy for the time she spent here. Now that I understood, a new emotion came to me that I hadn't felt before.

My heart ached for_ her_.

My heart ached for her and the dreams and hopes that she had lost. I hadn't thought about the conversation of her time by the ocean since I had learned the truth about her, and I suddenly realized that becoming a vampire was not something she wanted. I suddenly understood her talking of fates being unkind. I thought about how I held her and how she had melted into me. I thought about how she had closed her eyes and gripped onto me so tightly. I had spent so much time the last weeks feeling sorry for myself and nursing my hurt pride that I never thought about what this had all done to her.

I closed my eyes, inhaling deeply, and then let out the breath slowly. This was not a good place for me to be. This was unhealthy. No matter if my newfound thoughts concerning Tanya were a revelation or just my mind running wild. No matter that being here made me feel that much closer to her. She and I would never be. I would never see her again. I was angry that I had to remind myself, yet one more time, of that cold hard fact.

Suddenly, a figure suddenly blocked the setting sun from my view. I turned and saw a beautiful girl with long chestnut hair smiling at me.

"Hi," she smiled. She spoke in Russian.

"Hello," I answered back in English.

Her eyes showed surprise as she said in a heavy accent, "You are American?"

I smiled and nodded.

This seemed to intrigue her. With her head tilted to the side she asked, "Are you here alone?"

I chuckled a little as I answered. "Yes, I'm here alone."

She had a small smile on her face as she stepped closer and asked, "Are you in Sochi for a long visit?"

"No, just the day," I replied.

Her face showed a playful pout. She raised an eyebrow and said, "Could I change your mind?"

I used to be so good at this. I stared at her as I said, "Why do you ask?"

She smiled shyly and said, "I want to invite you to come to a club here in town with me tonight."

This seemed very ironic that this would happen at this moment. Sitting here thinking about Tanya the way I had been. I'd had plenty of opportunities over the last months to date, and I had walked away from all of them. Then, as I was about to decline the invitation, for some strange reason a long forgotten conversation with Bella came back to me.

She was angry that I had set her up on a date with Thomas Vaughn, and I had accused her of not being alive, of not really living. I had accused her of being more like a walking corpse. I remembered how she had been then, and I knew I was in real danger of becoming just like her. It would be so easy. To just let myself retreat, to live for work and the kill.

There had to be another way.

This was a vacation, right? I didn't _have_ to be anywhere. Why not stay one night in Sochi?

"Actually, that sounds great," I tried to sound enthusiastic.

Her smile was large and genuine, and I scooted over so that she could sit next to me. I tried not to be obvious as I took a good look at her eyes to make sure that they weren't red, or gold, or reddish gold. They were just deep pools of dark brown. I looked away as soon as possible.

She told me about herself. She was a college student in Sochi. Her parents were originally from here, but her family had lived in different places in Europe until she was 12. She had just come home after an internship in Berlin. Her name was Smina.

I told her about myself, and we had a nice conversation. She was an interesting, bright, and beautiful girl. The sun was beginning to go down, when I said I should probably go find a hotel. She dug in her bag for a pen and wrote directions as to where I should go for the hotel, and on the paper she also wrote her number. We walked to the top of the hill, and she seemed pleased at my choice of vehicles. She touched my arm as she said good-bye, and gave me what had to be her best smile as she walked over to her car. She waved one more time before she drove away.

I gave one last look at the ocean, and let my mind catch up.

What just happened?

I was on my way to a quiet seaside bed and breakfast, and instead, I was staying the night in Tanya's hometown, and going to a club with a beautiful girl. I shook my head and thought, _it could be worse_, and it was true, things could be a lot worse.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I kept stealing looks at the long, slender legs seated in the car next to me. She was even prettier than she had been at the beach earlier. Her dress was very short and made of a slinky silver material. Her shoes were those really high kind that always made women's legs look amazing. What was even better, was that she could actually walk in them. I tried not to be too obvious as I kept sniffing her great - smelling perfume. It really had been a long time.

She was directing me to the turn that would take us to Solyana Fabrique. Judging from the outside of the building, the high end cars parked outside, and the line of people waiting to get in, this was a hot place.

I was feeling a little nervous, anxious even. _This used to be my life_, I kept telling myself. The fleeting thought ran through my head at how much I wanted it to be Tanya that was on my arm right now, and how different things had been the moment I had seen her. I fought it. That kind of thinking wouldn't be helping anyone tonight.

Apparently, Smina had connections because we walked past the throngs of people and were let in immediately. She smiled and looked at me through the corner of her eye as we walked through the large doors. The club was dark, as all clubs are. The music was playing loudly and she took my hand and led me over to the coat check. I then asked her if she wanted a drink, and she nodded yes. We walked over to the bar and after a few sips she took my hand and pointed her head at the dance floor. I smiled and followed her.

The nightclub was decorated in a modern way. Everything was clear glass or black. There was a massive stairway against the far wall that led up to the upper level where another bar with televisions was located. The dance floor was tightly packed, and we made our way into the middle of the group. She was a very good dancer. She made it very easy to have a good time. When a slow song began I took her hand and pulled her close and she melted into me, her arms wrapped around my neck. Yes, she was making it very easy to have a good time.

We danced for about a half an hour, and then I noticed it was getting very hot on the dance floor. I was feeling a little claustrophobic with everyone pushed in so close. A slow song started and I suggested that after the next song we should go back to the bar. She smiled as she took my hands and placed them low on her hips and brushed her cheek against mine as her arms wound tightly around my neck.

A year ago, this would have been a sure thing. The night would definitely not end here on the dance floor. A year ago, I would have moved things along much faster than I had been tonight. I would have been much more forward with her, and from what I could tell from Smina's actions, I would have been successful with everything I tried. I was at war with myself. She definitely excited a part of me, the stereotypical male part of me, that had always been excited by things female and beautiful. But I had discovered a new part of me. The part of me that finally knew what real love felt like, to want just one certain woman forever. I didn't know how to get past that.

I could use Smina. It probably wouldn't even really be using her, since she already knew I was leaving tomorrow and that there would only be this one date. Smina certainly didn't seem to mind that this was just going to be one night. Before I had a chance to complete my thoughts, I felt Smina brush her lips across mine, and then she moved in. Her kiss was hard and passionate and was demanding in what she wanted from me. I kissed her back. _I can do this_, I reasoned. I had to start living sometime.

Then I opened my eyes.

My eyes traveled past Smina to the stairway. It was as if a part of me knew Tanya would be there and was forcing me to look.

And after all this time, there she was.

Her hair was exactly the same. Her figure was exactly the same. Her skin was exactly the same. But in the past year, my memory had betrayed me in remembering her face. Her cheekbones, her lips, her eyes. I felt my chest cave in and my breath came out in a large gust as I realized she was looking at me too.

I didn't even turn to look at Smina.

"Michael, where are you . . . . ." I didn't hear the rest.

I pushed my way through the crowd, never taking my eyes off her. For a moment, she continued looking at me, and then, she began rapidly climbing the stairs.

"Oh no you don't." I breathed to myself. "You are not running away from me again."

I was bordering on rude as I ascended the staircase. I pushed through people as I kept my eyes on her. I prayed there wasn't an exit from the second floor, but then I realized that wouldn't stop her. I pushed harder. I saw her move to the right, deeper into the crowd, as I reached the top of the stairs. I took a different route, behind the bar. One bartender tried to stop me, but I rushed past him and then vaulted myself over the counter as I landed right behind her. Then I reached out and grabbed her hand.

I felt something in me release as soon as I touched her.

"Tanya," I said softly. I knew she would be able to hear me.

She stopped and kept her back to me for a moment before she turned to look at me. To be looking at her face again, to be holding her hand again, was indescribable to me. There was so much. So many questions. So much I wanted to talk to her about. So much that I had to say to her.

I just smiled and said, "Hi."

It was the right thing to do. She smiled back at me. I was extremely aware that she hadn't tried to release my hand.

"Hello, Michael." She said warmly.

Great, at least she had remembered my name.

"It's so good to see you," she added.

"Yes, it's very good to see you too." Could there be a bigger understatement?

"It's a surprise to see you here in Sochi." She swallowed hard as she plastered a smile on her face.

I gave my full effort at being casual. "I have been on assignment in Moscow for several months. I needed a vacation," I answered.

She either wasn't surprised by my news, or didn't care. It was impossible to tell.

Her eyes flitted down to the dance floor. "You didn't come on vacation alone."

She didn't phrase it as a question, and for a moment I was confused. Then it hit me. Smina. I had forgotten all about her. Damn.

I started in quickly. Probably a little too quickly. "No. I only met her today down at the beach. I'm not with anyone . . . ah, what I mean to say is that I came alone and . . ."

"Hey," she gently interrupted. "It's okay, you don't have to explain anything to me." She squeezed my hand for a moment, and then said softly, "It was so good to see you."

She began to turn and walk away. I still had her hand. I held on as tightly as I could and cried, "No!"

I didn't care about the strange looks I was getting. I was panicking. She couldn't leave, not yet. Not like this.

She turned and looked at me curiously as I blurted out, "Please, _please,_ don't go yet. It has been so long since I've seen you, and Tanya . . ." I didn't care what a fool I was making of myself. "Tanya, I think about you all the time. Not a day has gone by that I haven't thought about that night in New York."

For a split second, she held on tighter to my hand. She stared hard at me and I had absolutely no idea what she was thinking. After almost half a minute her eyes softened and her chest began moving. Had she stopped breathing all that time? I began pulling her closer to me, but she would have none of it. She stopped herself, and it would have been easier to move a 2 ton marble statue than to make her move another inch.

"I have to go, Michael." She said flatly.

"Why?" I challenged.

"Because it will do neither of us any good for me to stay."

She began to let go of my hand and I knew there was only one thing that would keep her there longer.

"I know everything, Tanya," I whispered.

She slowly turned back to me with wide eyes. Her chest was moving up and down rapidly now.

"What do you mean 'you know everything'?" She asked harshly.

"You know exactly what I mean." I said evenly.

Her eyes narrowed as she looked hastily around the room. She looked at me again with real anger on her face as she held tightly to my hand and pulled me to a dark corner of the room. We ended up behind a black partition that was used for stacking chairs.

She turned furiously to me and whispered harshly, "What are you talking about?"

"I know what you are, Tanya."

She clenched her teeth as her head went down. "That's why Edward has been trying to get a hold of me," she said to herself. Her eyes then rose back up to me and her look was scorching. "There are dangerous people here. Do you have any idea how vulnerable you are?"

I grinned as I said, "I imagine I could be killed rather quickly."

She let out a gust of frustrated air as she whispered, "Then you know exactly why I am going to walk away right now and never see you again."

"Because you are a vampire?" I said with raised eyebrows.

"Shh!" She said fiercely. "Don't ever say that word out loud again!"

I moved closer to her and whispered, "Vampire."

"Stop it!" She hissed.

I stepped closer. "Vampire."

"Do you have any idea the danger you could be in?" She frantically demanded.

I stepped within an inch of her face and whispered, "Vampire." And then my lips were on hers. I grabbed her on each side of her face and kissed her. I kissed her the way I had dreamed of kissing her everyday and every night for over a year. I felt every part of me coming alive. This was it. This was all I wanted. I heard her sigh. It was a sigh like she was giving up, giving in. And then she was kissing me back.

I pushed her against the wall and continued kissing her with all the penned up emotion that had been building in me. I never thought I would see her again. I never thought I would touch her, smell her. And yet, here she was in my arms. Her granite lips were all I needed.

"Tanya, I love you," I managed to breathe out.

I could have died from passion when she whispered my name.

I kissed her neck, then her mouth, then her neck again. I was completely lost in her when she said in a thick voice, "This will never work, Michael."

I pulled back just enough to see her eyes and said, "I know what you're saying. I found out your secret just weeks ago, and I was sure I was done. I was sure I was leaving you in my past. I was on vacation to clear my head. To start fresh. That girl down there is my first attempt at going on with my life since you ran away from me. But now . . . ." I ran my fingers over her cheek. "I don't know who I was kidding. You are all I'll ever want. All I'll ever need."

She stared at me defiantly. "There is no way this will ever work. Be serious, be honest with yourself."

I spoke with my lips brushing over hers. "For months I have been trying to convince myself that I didn't love you. I have been telling myself I needed to move on. Right here, right now is the first time I've been honest with myself in a long, long time."

"I could kill you right now."

"I'm sure you could."

"I could drink your blood right now and walk away and no one would ever know what happened to you."

"I don't doubt that for a second."

"I could . . ." I put my finger over her lips and said, "Just answer me one thing." I searched her eyes earnestly. I held her with my gaze and whispered, "That night at the ball, did you feel it?"

She squirmed beneath my gaze and I persisted. "Tanya, this whole conversation comes to this one question. Did you feel the same thing I felt that night?

She began to protest again and I shook my head. "Tanya, when I touched and held you that night I wanted you like I have never wanted anything. But I knew, that it wasn't just that one night that I wanted with you. I wanted a million nights and a million days just be near you."

She finally began to relax into my arms. "Tanya, there has been no one else since you. I have been in _hell_ without you. I have fallen totally in love with you. Absolutely and completely."

I touched her face again and said, "You can't know how good it feels for me to tell you these things. I never thought I would be able to tell you. I never thought I would be able to see you and hold you in my arms and tell you that you have my heart."

We just stared at each other. Her eyes were soft and I was aware that she was breathing deeply, and completely at peace in my arms.

"Tanya," I sighed. I loved saying her name. "Did you feel the same that night? Do you feel the same way about me now?"

Her eyes closed for a moment, and when she opened them again, her eyes were different. They were sad.

"It doesn't matter how I feel," she said flatly.

I put my finger under her chin and lifted her face to mine and said forcefully, "No, you're wrong. It is the _only_ thing that matters."

"It's not that simple, Michael."

"Tell me you love me," I implored. "Tell me I am not alone in feeling this way. Tell me you have been thinking of me too."

"What will that change?" She seemed like she was crying, but there were no tears.

I brushed my lips across her cheek. "For me," I whispered, "It changes everything."

I pressed in closer to her and kissed her as I said, "Tell me you love me."

She sighed and feebly pushed me away.

"You can do this, Tanya."

I kissed her softly on her forehead and let my lips travel slowly down her face. Her eyes were closed, and I kissed both her eyelids. Then I put my lips back on hers and murmured, "I love you Tanya, do you love me?"

She pulled me close and huskily whispered, "Yes. Yes, Michael, I love you."

It was like fire flashed through my veins.

I pressed on. "And you ran away that night not because you were trying to get away from me, but that you were trying to protect me and keep me from learning your secret?"

She just nodded her head. I put her face between my hands and just stared at her. She loved me. Tanya loved me. I laid her head against my chest and held her. I kissed her hair and tried to think of how I could go about marrying a vampire. I wouldn't ask her tonight. But it would be soon, very soon.

I didn't want to spoil the moment, but I wanted to leave the nightclub. I wanted to take her back to my hotel. I suddenly realized that she may have a house here in Sochi. Perhaps this was where she had been all this time. I knew nothing about her, really. Did she live here to be near family? If so, they would have to be vampires too, wouldn't they?

There was so much to learn about her, but I wasn't concerned. There was plenty of time to find out everything. I planned on us being pretty much inseparable. I wanted her as near to me as she wished to be.

"Can we leave this place?" I asked softly.

She didn't answer.

"We can go anywhere you want. I have a hotel nearby," I whispered.

"Can we . . ." She swallowed hard and began again. "Can we just stay here a little longer?"

"Of course?" I replied.

I kept my arms around her. I laid my cheek on her head and ran my fingers slowly down her back and just took her in. Her scent was so captivating. The feel of her so familiar in my mind. There was nowhere on earth that I would rather be.

I still was amazed that just holding her brought me peace. It was like she calmed all the storms in my soul. I had heard of love my whole life and never understood what it meant. I never understood all the songs and stories about love, and why someone would die for it.

Now, I understood.

I don't know how long we stayed that way. Time seemed inconsequential when I was with her. But without any warning, I felt her stiffen and then she let out a long sigh.

"I'm ready," she said softly.

I felt at the time, that she didn't say it for my benefit, but that she was actually talking to someone else.

I kissed her once more as I took her hand and turned to walk out from behind the partition. But when I turned, I was surprised to see a man blocking our exit. It took less than a second for me to realize this was no man. No human man, anyway. His coal black hair was to his shoulders, his eyes were dark red, and his stare was the most menacing thing I had ever seen. My teeth clenched as I recognized him as the man from the ball.

Tanya stepped in front of me and said calmly, but forcefully, "Alexei, you will not hurt him."

She then turned to face me. Her eyes were determined, but her halting voice betrayed her. "I will always remember this. I will forever be thankful you found me again, Michael. You have no idea how much seeing you again means to me."

My head was swirling. I was in complete shock. "Tanya, you can't possibly be telling me you are trying to leave me, again."

She backed a step away from me. "I will not bring you anywhere near this life. I will not put you in danger. And I will not let my demons come any closer to ruining you."

I grabbed her face and put my hands into her hair. "Didn't you hear any of the things I said tonight? I love you, Tanya. There will never be anyone else!" I put my forehead to hers and whispered, "Be happy with me."

For a moment her breath caught and in her sigh I heard her whisper something to me. "Sudba."

Then, she moved quickly. I forgot how fast she could move. I opened my eyes and she was standing behind Alexei, looking at me over his shoulder.

"Make a real life, Michael."

"Don't do this, Tanya," I pleaded.

Then she was gone.

I did stupidly try and push past Alexei The Sinister Vampire, but he placed his fingers gingerly around my neck and squeezed just tightly enough to make the room go black. When he finally let go, I fell to my knees and gasped for air. By the time my lungs stopped burning enough for me to look up, he too, had vanished.

I don't recall much more of what happened that night.

But, there were three things of which I remember being absolutely certain.

One, there was some part of Tanya, I wasn't sure how strong, that loved me, but not enough to see this through.

Two, I was absolutely, unconditionally, and irrevocably in love with a vampire.

And three, if given the chance, I knew beyond any shadow of a doubt, I would become a vampire for her.

- - -

**YES! WAY TO GO MICHAEL! I would love to know what all of you are thnking . . . . . **


	25. THE PLAN

**If it's possible, your reviews just keep getting better and better. I am not good enough for the reviews you are writing. **

I have a review from yesterday by **green eye girl** that I want to share, just to give you a better idea of Simmons: **"I love the mental picture of a tall, sad but gorgeous blond looking at the sea, looking like he was posing for a Calvin Klein Ad. With his pants rolled up and his white shirt loose with his hands in his pockets. *sigh*"** I got her permission to let you all read that.

**See ya at the end . . . . . . .**

**Chapter 10 - VAMPIRE**

**- - - - - - - - - - - - - -**

I woke up the next morning to the sound of a seagull nearby. I tried to focus, but my eyes wouldn't open properly. They were full of sand. So was my mouth. I turned on my side and began spitting out the tiny rocks, but my teeth kept crunching on gritty sand. I reached for the large bottle of vodka and found there was just enough left in it to rinse out my mouth.

The seagull squawked again, and the noise made my head feel like it was splitting in two. I threw the now empty bottle in the direction of the sound, and heard the flapping of wings. Satisfied, I lay back down on the cold wet sand and concentrated on breathing slowly in and out. I don't think even in college I'd had a hangover this bad. Of course, in college I wouldn't have been able to get my hands on 100 percent proof Russian vodka, either.

Images of the night before swam in my mind. Despite how I felt, all I wanted to do was grab another bottle and make myself forget all over again. I winced as a memory of a furious Smina standing at the bottom the stairs came to me. Her arms were folded and her eyes were smoldering. I winced again as I remembered that I walked away and left her there. I had driven aimlessly for a while, then I'd seen a liquor store. Apparently, I'd ended up at the beach.

_Damn stubborn vampire_, I thought angrily to myself. There was now one more thing I had learned about Tanya. She was incredibly stubborn.

Through squinting eyes, I could tell the sun was straight up in the sky. It was the middle of the day then. Good to know. I tried to swallow and cringed. My mouth tasted like seaweed, sand and alcohol. I cautiously rose up on one elbow and used my sleeve to wipe the sand out of my eyes. I wiped a few times, and through the blur I looked out at the ocean. A large wave hit the shore and the rising and swelling motion of the water did me in. My stomach heaved and I rose onto my knees and vomited.

"_Nice vacation_," I thought sarcastically.

I took off my jacket and did my best to clean myself up as I slowly rose to my feet. An older couple walked passed me suspiciously. The woman apparently caught a whiff of me and grimaced as she turned her head. Wisely, they gave me a wide berth.

"Oh, yeah," I wanted to yell. "Let's see _you_ fall in love with a vampire. I'd like to see how well _you_ handle it!" But I thought better of it and kept my mouth shut.

_Good-bye Sochi_. I thought.

_Good-bye and good_ _riddance_.

Then I turned my back to the water and tossed my jacket on the mess I'd made and began half crawling, half climbing my way up to my car.

**- - - - - - - - - - - - - -**

Driving can clear your head. So can a hot shower and four cups of strong, black Russian coffee. Those three things together proved to be a good combination. As I drove, I came to a conclusion.

I had to accept that I was never going to find her.

If I went out searching for her, I realized at some point I might actually go insane. But only after I had wasted my whole life looking.

I knew I would never find her, but that didn't mean I was giving up. Tanya told me that she loved me. Before I left the night club the night before, I repeated the word that Tanya had said to me to the bartender.

"What does "subda" mean?" I demanded.

He looked at me curiously. "It means destiny," he had said.

Somehow I had always known she had felt it. We would find our way to each other. There was no way I was living my life without her.

We were going to see each other again. Hopefully very soon.

I had a plan.

On the drive back to Moscow, I began to work out exactly what it would take to make my plan work. If I was brave enough to do this, or maybe crazy or stupid enough, there was a chance that I would succeed. There was a chance that I would see her again. Just what was my plan?

I was going to flush her out.

If this didn't work, I knew I might see a few more vodka filled nights in my future. If I survived that long.

I had been missing Bella. But now, I was glad that she wasn't around. If she knew I was doing this, she would be furious. Judging from the last time I saw Edward, and how protective he was of Bella and their secret, he would be far beyond enraged if he knew.

Someone looking from the outside in, may see my acts as suicidal, I preferred to call them deliberate.

It took several hours to get back. Even when I drove around 90 -100 miles per hour. With this car I bet I could keep up with Edward. I thought about what Bella had said about the vampire police before she left. What had she called them? It was the Volturi, I think. I wondered if they would get involved in this. She had feared them, and said that even Edward would not be able to stop them. I'm sure I had no idea what I was getting into. All I knew was that I had to try.

I returned to Moscow at 3:00 in the afternoon. I could have just waited until tomorrow morning to begin implementing my plan, but I intended to start right away. I made a phone call to the chief detective of the case involving Olivia Conner's death. When I told him I had new information that could help in finding her killer, he asked me to come into the station immediately.

I walked in with purpose. I knew there was a chance that he was going to think I was a lunatic. That was a chance I would have to take. I was led back to his office where he shut the door behind me. I had to give him credit. He sat there and listened to everything I had to say. The longer I spoke, the more disbelieving his look became, but he allowed me to speak without interruption until I was done. When I finished, he looked at me through narrowed eyes for at least a full minute without saying a word. He began speaking in a heavy accent. His first question was expected.

"You are telling me vampires killed Olivia Conner?"

"No, I believe it was just one vampire," I stated matter of factly.

He ran his hands slowly over his weary face.

"Where do you suggest we look for these vampires?" He asked sarcastically.

"Well, I would start at houses that are far away from large groups of people. There is one family of vampires that I know that are extremely wealthy. That might be one characteristic to throw in the mix."

They were the only vampire family I knew, but I had to look like I knew what I was talking about. The detective just stared at me.

"I would also check out the university for students that are not originally from Moscow. A transfer student, perhaps. A vampire can't live in any one place for very long because they are immortal and do not age."

One eyebrow went up as stared at me again. I think he was trying to determine if I was really trying to be serious, or not. He leaned back in his chair and said, "Wouldn't these vampire college students be easy to spot with their fangs and claws?"

I knew he wasn't buying any of this, and I knew this was just how he would react. My job was to treat this conversation as seriously as I could without getting upset. After all, I knew how unbelievable it all was. I went through everything I could tell him about the characteristics of vampires. I listed everything from pale skin to eye color to their unearthly beauty. But it wasn't until I mentioned how they sparkled in the sunlight, and therefore would probably be signed up for night classes, that his head suddenly jerked up. I saw a light of recognition on his face.

He reached for the file of Olivia that was sitting in front of him on his desk. He quickly began filing through the thick pile of papers looking for something specific. I inched closer in my seat, and asked him what he was looking for.

He searched quietly for a few seconds longer, and then he suddenly stopped and pulled out a single piece of paper. He read it silently, then he looked up at me with an incredulous look on his face.

"What?" I asked expectantly.

"Olivia's roommate," he began, "She remembered an incident during the courtship of Olivia and her boyfriend Nikolai. She stated in a report that she was looking out the window one morning as Olivia ran out the door to meet Nikolai who always picked her up for school.

She said that the sun was just coming up and when Nikolai got out of the car to meet her, his arms and face began to glitter as if he were covered in diamonds. When Olivia saw his skin, she became very anxious, and quickly told Nikolai to get back into the car."

I stared at the detective as he read through the statement again. When he did finally look up at me, his face no longer had that weary, please-get-this-crazy-man-out-of-my-office-look. He pulled his chair up close to his desk and asked me to go over everything again. This time, he took notes.

When I walked out of the police station, I felt exposed. Thoughts of the vampire police ran through my head. I knew it was my imagination, but I felt like I was being watched. There was no backing out of this now, I reminded myself.

It had worked for Zach Conner. He got too close to the truth and Tanya walked right into his office one night. Okay, so Conner was still missing, and presumed dead, but I wasn't about to split hairs at this point. This plan would work, I was sure of it.

**- - - - - - - - - - - - - **

I had been back at the office for two months since my unforgettable "vacation", and putting my plan into effect. I had been working twenty-hour days. It was easier for me that way. I now understood Bella's drive to work the crazy hours that she did. But there was one difference. Bella's pain came because she mistakenly believed that Edward didn't love her and that he wasn't coming back. My pain came because I knew that Tanya loved me, and still, after two months, she'd hadn't returned.

There were posters up all around the city. Nikolai's picture was everywhere. It wasn't a great picture. It was one that Olivia's roommate took one night a club. The police were hitting this investigation hard. My receptionist, Karli, said that there were posters all over campus as well.

Every time I saw a poster it was like it was mocking me. Telling me that she didn't care. That she wouldn't be coming back to me. The pain had a way of eating right through my insides, slowly burning away the lining of my stomach. It never ceased to amaze me how missing one person so much could actually cause physical pain.

Every day seemed to melt right into the next with nothing out of the ordinary. I would get up early, work out in the hotel gym, and then head to work until I dropped into bed again in the wee hours of the morning. In the back of my mind a thought kept fighting its way to the surface. It had started small, but lately it had grown annoyingly large.

What if I never saw Tanya again?

What if I lived to be ninety years old and truly never saw her again? I did the math, and it was sixty-five more years. I couldn't do it. I really didn't think I could. Would I really spend my life alone? Did I have a choice? Just how exactly, was I supposed to spend it with someone else when I knew Tanya loved me? She wasn't only a stubborn vampire, but she was also selfish. You don't tell someone you love them unless you plan to stay and see it through. She had to know she was dooming me.

I tried to imagine myself married to someone else. I tried to imagine children. I tried to imagine myself lying in bed at night watching another woman sleep. I tried to give her any face but Tanya's.

It wasn't working.

If I did end up alone, I would carve out a life, but I decided right then that if I wasn't going to have Tanya, I wouldn't grow old with anyone else. It wouldn't be fair to that person. Second choice was not going to fill my life.

That afternoon, as if the fates hadn't already shown me how much they hated me, I received a call from Sterling Hathaway. He was calling to tell me that I had exceeded his expectations on turning things around and making the branch profitable, and he wanted to "reward me" for being so faithful to him. At first I got a horrible feeling he was going to put my name on the building right after his, but what he offered me was much worse. He was giving me a new assignment. He informed me that I was only needed at the Moscow Firm for another week, and then he was sending me to Greece.

As he continued speaking, I learned that my home office would be in Greece, but I would be overseeing the whole Mediterranean Coastline. He was not sending me there with the same title I had now, he was making me Vice President, of his whole Western International market. I would be second in command to him on everything on the European Continent and the African Continent, which included Egypt and Libya, two of our biggest markets.

He said he had my replacement, and my mind had to work fast to come up with an argument that would keep me in Russia longer. I convinced him it would be better to go with a Russian native. it would go a long way to making this firm more profitable with local businessman who were ready to invest. I told him that they would be much more trustful of someone from their own country. He bought it. I now had three weeks left in Moscow.

After I got off the phone I was numb. I truly did not know what else I could do to find Tanya. My plan didn't work. It didn't work.

Over the next week I sat through exhausting interviews. They were made all the more tedious by the fact that an interpreter had to be there for us to communicate. After interviewing several candidates, I felt that so far there was just one or two that might be able to handle this job.

Now, It was late. Everyone else had left the office hours ago. There was much to be done before I left Moscow. My bleary eyes fought to focus on the computer screen as I tried to endure one more hour at my desk. I had just sent a lengthy email to the office in Cyprus when my cell phone rang. I didn't recognize the number.

"Hello," I said.

"You are in danger, Mike." The voice was breathy and desperate. I felt the hair on the back of my neck stand up.

"Who is this?" I demanded.

His voice lowered an octave as he breathed out, "It's Zach Conner, get the hell out of there, man."

I shot up out of my chair. "Zach!" "Where are you? We all thought you were dead."

"Yeah, and it's gonna stay that way," he replied obstinately.

"Where are you, Zach. Are you still in Russia?"

"Listen, to what I'm saying, Mike. They know everything. Just get out of there, now!" He was talking through clenched teeth.

"What are you talking about? Who knows everything?" I asked impatiently. I heard a click, and the call was disconnected.

It took about three seconds for my head to catch up with the conversation. Zach Conner, vampires, know everything, get the hell out of here.

My cell phone was still in my hand as I tore out of the office and raced down the hall to the elevator. Without stopping, I quickly decided in my head that the stairs would be faster. I wasn't going to stand there waiting for the ding of the elevator as it reached my floor. As I pushed open the door to the stairs, I heard the window shattering in my office. The office was on the seventh floor.

Adrenaline can make a person do amazing things. How long it would take the vampires to realize I wasn't in the office, I didn't know. But, I was going to make it as hard as I could for them to catch me. I was diving down the stairwell taking 7 or 8 stairs at a time. I didn't try to be quiet. They would hear me regardless. When I reached the lobby, I ran for the back entrance that we used for deliveries. I pushed open the door and ran out into a dark alley. My car was on the roof at the parking garage, so my only option was to keep running. I had no idea where I was going, I just knew I had to get somewhere public where it would be harder for them to drink my blood without someone noticing.

I came around the side of the building and quickly turned left. I was on the main road and trying to put as much distance between me and the office as I could. As I ran, I looked wildly up and down the streets and saw no one. I began to panic. If this were New York, I thought, the streets would still be teeming with people at 1:00 in the morning. My throat was beginning to burn. I was in good shape, but I was running full out. This was a lot different than a damned hotel treadmill. I looked back over my shoulder to see if anyone was following me, and all I saw was empty sidewalk. In relief, I slowed down enough just to catch my breath.

I ran two more blocks, never seeing anyone. I looked behind me again, and when I saw that the sidewalk was clear, I stopped and put my hands on my knees and gulped in large gasps of air. When I stood up, I saw a dark figure fall from a tall building in front of me. Then I realized in horror, he didn't fall.

He jumped.

He landed as soft as a cat on the sidewalk and lowered to a crouch staring at me. It was then I understood that he had been following me from the rooftops rather than chasing me from the ground like a normal human would do.

My eyes darted from left to right as I looked for any chance, any help at all that would get me out of this. There was nothing. He began walking towards me in a casual gait as if we were old friends. He smiled at me, and the gleam of his teeth showed in the streetlight. He was 50 feet from me when I could finally see his eyes. They glowed with a dark red that made my bones rigid with fear. It seemed almost impossible to breathe. He was 45 feet away, then 40 feet.

My hands instinctively balled into fists as I took a step backward. I planned to fight my way to death. I wouldn't go quietly.

"Hello, Michael." His voice jolted me even though it was low and velvet.

I swallowed hard and took another step back.

"You are a troublemaker, Michael." He was 30 feet away now. His skin glowed in the darkness and his teeth shone as he smiled at me forebodingly.

I took another step back as I prepared for what was about to happen.

His steps slowed as he momentarily closed his eyes. He clenched his teeth tight and blew air into his mouth. I could hear the whistle as the air passed through his teeth. He exhaled slowly and this time breathed in deeply through his nose. When he opened his eyes again, they were wild. He was salivating, ravenous in anticipation. He snarled deep in his throat and I knew I would try to run. My muscles were coiled and ready to launch, even though I knew I wouldn't even get my feet off the ground before he would have me.

This wasn't how it was supposed to be, I thought frantically. Tanya was supposed to come. I had it all planned out.

He glanced down at my balled fists and then raised an eyebrow at me as he said, "I am glad you intend to fight. It will make it so much more enjoyable for me."

I've heard it said that your whole life passes in front of you before you die. For me, that wasn't the case. Everything seemed to go in slow motion. He crouched low and suddenly crossed the 30 feet between us in a blink. His eyes swam in a sea of red as he grabbed me by the neck and pulled me into the alley. I swung my fists at him, and felt as if I were hitting solid rock. His granite hard fingers tightened as he suddenly spun and hurled me at the building. I slammed into the brick with so much force. I heard my head hit before I felt it. It was a sickening sound. I was at least 10 feet off the ground when I came slamming down to the pavement. I put out my hands to catch myself, and when I landed, I heard a snap in my left arm. I let out a yell of pain, and turned on my back to see him standing above me.

He was clenching his teeth as he angrily said, "You stupid human. How dare you humiliate my family!"

He grabbed me by my broken arm and I screamed. He seemed to enjoy that. I felt his frigid breath as his nose ran up and down my neck. His voice shook with impatience as he whispered menacingly, "I will watch your blood flow before I drink it."

I was in the air much longer this time. I braced for the hit and slammed into the dumspster that was halfway down the alley. My whole body seemed to crumble with the impact. He was there staring down at me. It was hard to focus. I realized it was from the blood running down my face. I could see his white teeth gleaming.

"That's better," he purred.

Then there was a bright light behind him. He turned around and hissed, annoyed at the delay. I tried to wipe the blood out of my eyes, but my arms wouldn't obey. There was a scuffle by my feet, and I heard a horrible cracking sound and high-pitched screams and in my daze I thought it was me. But then, I felt gentle hands lifting me and carrying me. I didn't understand what was happening. I waited to be sent flying into another wall. I prepared for more pain, but instead, I felt myself being laid somewhere soft, and warmth was all around me.

I could hear panicked voices in and out. I realized I must still be alive, but I didn't know how that could be possible. Then, I was sure I was dying. I could hear Tanya. I called out her name. _Let her name be my last words_, I begged. I tried to breathe, but it hurt so much. I felt everything go black.

"Tanya,_"_ I breathed.

**Oh no! There will be answers coming . . . . . See you tomorrow!**


	26. CONSEQUENCES

**Wow, sorry this is out later than usual. It has been one of those days.**

**You reviews have become like food to me. Each one inspires me. Far after this story is done, I will continue to read them. **

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1. Read **Discovery** by **Aspiring Empath**. She just posted another chapter. Great story about Bella's grandaughter! Go to my my fav. authors and she is there.

**2. I saw Star Trek for the third time yesterday. THIS SHOW ROCKS SO COMPLETELY! **

**Chapter 11 - CONSEQUENCES**

**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -**

I woke up to see a man with very pale skin standing over me, but I had no instinct to be frightened of him. He shined a light into my pupils and then stepped back and smiled.

"Hello, I'm Dr. Carlisle Cullen." His voice was gentle, but I was trying to determine what to make of him. He was definitely a vampire. That much was obvious, but I knew that I was safe around him.

I went to lift my hand to greet him, but I couldn't move my arm. I looked down and was surprised to see that my arm was in a cast from my wrist to my shoulder. I saw that my other arm was also wrapped and bandaged. I tried to rise up in the bed only to find that my chest was wrapped tightly and the pain of moving sent deep, jagged spasms of pain traveling through me. My head was pounding. I brought my bandaged arm up to my forehead and felt another thick layer of bandages there as well. In fact, the farther I came out of unconsciousness, the more I realized that just about every part of my body was bandaged and in pain.

The doctor gently pushed me back down on the bed and adjusted something on my I.V. tube.

"You are a lucky man, Mr. Simmons."

I raised an eyebrow and was pleased to find there was not much pain involved in that.

"You call this lucky?" I croaked out the words, and felt another jolt of pain, this one coming from my jaw.

His face became serious. "You will heal from these injuries, it could have been much worse."

I looked around my surroundings and saw that I was not in a hospital, but in a bedroom. I was hooked up in various ways to machines that beeped and lit up, but I was definitely not in a hospital.

"Where am I?" I whispered hoarsely. I was trying to speak without actually moving my mouth.

He took a deep breath and said, "You are at a house on the outskirts of Moscow. Before you came here, you were at a hospital."

He took a hold of the fingers on my less injured hand and asked me to squeeze his hand gently. I squeezed his hand, and that seemed to make him very happy.

He smiled at me and continued. "Once we determined that you were stable from your internal injuries, and that you did not have a skull fracture, we brought you here."

"How long have I been here?" I whispered.

"We brought you here three days ago."

"We?"

"Ah, that reminds me, I was supposed to inform them as soon as you awoke." He moved swiftly to the door and closed it behind him and a moment later it opened again. Bella and Edward walked into the room. Bella looked worried until she saw me make eye contact with her and then her look turned ferocious.

"It's a good thing you're alive, Simmons, because I want to kill you myself."

I wanted to defend my actions, but all I could manage was a very dramatic eye roll.

"Don't you roll your eyes at me! Do you have any idea how stupid you are?"

I think I had a small grasp on how stupid I was. "Bella, I . . . .." I tried to talk, but my jaw was killing me.

"You promised me you would keep our secret, _my_ secret. How could you do this?"

She was right. I had promised her that. I actually never saw my act as a betrayal. I just saw it as a means to an end. To get Tanya back.

"S. . .sorry," I pushed out.

"You truly have no idea how dangerous all of this was, do you?"

I opened my mouth to try and speak, but before I had a chance to say anything, she was at me again.

"You could be dead, right now. Dead in some alley, like a street bum. Did you even stop to think what that would do to the people who care about you?"

She wasn't done.

"I don't understand. Why did you do this? Why would you tell the police about Nikolai? How did _you_ even find out about Nikolai? I told you we would take care of it. Why did you stir this all back up again?"

This was reminding me of the first time I had a confrontation with Bella back when we first started working together. She ripped me pretty hard that day. That time, I didn't deserve it. But this time, I deserved everything she was throwing at me.

Edward, who had been surprisingly silent, turned to Bella and said, "He was trying to make Tanya so angry that she would come to Moscow and see him again, just like when she came to warn Zachary Conner. He was trying to flush her out with all the publicity."

Bella's face flashed on mine. "You were doing this for Tanya? Are you nuts?" She yelled.

_Yes Bella_, I wanted to say_. I think I did go a little nuts_.

Edward turned his back to me and muttered something that only Bella could hear. When he was finished, her shoulders fell and her face changed. Instead of just rage on her face, there was rage mixed with a touch of sympathy. She came and stood by the bed and said begrudgingly, "Are you really in a lot of pain?"

I closed my eyes and nodded my head.

"Good," she said quietly, but forcefully. She shook her head as she looked me up and down.

"You look terrible," She said with a grimace.

I tried to laugh, but it hurt like crazy. I concentrated on taking short shallow breaths. It was so good to see her, even if she was mad enough to kill me. She exhaled with a frustrated sigh.

"This is partly our fault," she said angrily.

"Why?" I managed to whisper.

"We thought we had resolved the situation here, " She surveyed my broken body then looked in my eyes again. "We couldn't have been more wrong."

"Not your fault," I managed to say.

"Well, it's not our fault that you're an idiot, but we do carry some of the responsibility for the family of Nikolai. We thought they were finally at peace about the situation."

There were many questions I had regarding Nikolai and his family, and I wanted all the answers. But, there was another question much more important.

"Where's Tanya," I breathed.

Bella looked at me with confusion, and Edward stepped forward and answered for her. "I'm sorry, we don't know that. We haven't seen or spoken to her in almost a year."

My breath exhaled painfully. That couldn't be right. She had saved me. I had heard her voice. She was there, I knew she was there.

Edward shook his head slowly. "Tanya was never there that night, Michael."

I opened my mouth to protest, but Edward shook his head again.

"Michael, we saved you that night, not Tanya."

I closed my eyes and felt it again. That ripping pain that far surpassed any of the pain of my injuries. I wondered if that vampire doctor had any medication to stop me from feeling this.

Bella came and sat on the edge of the bed and gently took a hold of my hand. The cold felt good on my bruised fingers. Besides being stubborn I now learned something else about Tanya. She was very good at keeping her word. She told me she wouldn't let me any nearer to her life, and apparently, she meant it.

"Thank you," I said hoarsely. "For saving me."

Bella didn't answer, she just smiled weakly.

"Who . . . ." I had to stop and take another shallow breath. "Who tried to kill me?"

Bella sighed hard and turned to look at Edward. He nodded slightly and stepped to the edge of the bed.

"I do feel I that I made one error where you are concerned, Michael." Edward said quietly.

"When Bella told me that you had learned the truth about us, I should have come straight over to your room and pressed upon you with absolute clarity what was really at stake here. I thought giving you as little information as possible would be a safety to you." He sighed heavily. "That was my mistake."

"But, I am a fast learner, Michael. Now that you've been attacked by a vampire, there doesn't seem to be a reason to shield you from the harsh realities of my world."

I felt that he was about to give me answers. I couldn't imagine anything I needed more right now than that. I would take any truths he would give me.

"Tell me everything," I breathed.

His eyes narrowed for a moment. "Shortly, it may not matter one way or another what secrets I ask you to keep, but I am asking for there to be trust between us on this, you cannot say anything to anyone, will you swear that to me, Michael?"

I didn't understand what he meant by that. But I wanted to make sure he told me everything. I let go of Bella's hand and raised my arm. I took another shallow breath and whispered, "I swear."

He took a large breath, and began.

"Russia, has been here in one form or another for many centuries, and until just the last several decades, has mostly been ruled by royalty of some sort. One thing that has been consistent in rulers around the world, is that when a person becomes a member of royalty, especially if they were born into it, they jealously try to hold on to their power. Usually they are not content with the power they were given, but they are constantly searching for more and more supremacy and control over their people. Such was the case with Alexei Grinkov.

A few centuries ago, he was a member of the ruling family. Even as a human, he was power hungry and full of contempt for the peasants he professed to love. His darker traits only worsened when on a hunting trip, he became separated from his party and found out too late that the scent he was tracking was not a bear, but a coven of vampires.

For some strange reason, they did not kill him, they only bit him and moved on. When he was fully changed and was able to understand the strength and power he now possessed, he believed that this was his destiny. That this was a gift to him from the Gods. He also wasn't able to let go of the idea that he was still royalty.

He appointed himself leader of the Russian sector of vampires and battled anyone who challenged him. He had been taught all forms of fighting, from fencing to hand to hand combat since the days of his youth, and he could not be beaten. His following became larger and larger until he truly was undefeatable. He gave himself the title "Tsar Schlyvokk," meaning, "Royal Vampire".

His plan was to branch out. He wanted to have more and more territory under his control, but the Volturi found out about him. They attacked, and within a few days killed almost half of his counsel. It scared him enough that he backed down. The Volturi planned on killing him as well, but soon learned that keeping him in power in Russia was to their advantage. He kept the smaller warring covens in control and brought stability to this very large region. They formed an alliance, with the understanding that he would not try to gain any more land or power than he already had, and he would keep this region under control. It is an arrangement that has worked well, until now."

"Is this," I tried to say, "The same Alexei that . . . . ."

Edward nodded at me. "Yes, this is the same Alexei that you saw in New York.

My eyes got big. I had no idea that he was so powerful. Why was Tanya with him?

Edward continued.

"Things have gone relatively well for centuries. There have been slight disturbances and small wars that have broken out among covens, but for the most part, there has been peace. The reason for that is because Alexei has ruled with an iron fist. He has tolerated no warring among covens and his most hard and fast rule has always been secrecy. He has not allowed any human contact into the vampire world, and if he has ever even suspected that a human was aware of our secret, they were instantly killed, along with the vampire that allowed the breach."

Edward paused and sighed for a moment. "That brings us to Nikolai."

I licked my parched lips as he stopped for a moment to gather his thoughts before continuing. He walked over and stood beside Bella. He put his hand in hers, then he went on.

"From what we were told, Nikolai, was on the Universtiy campus one night and saw Olivia. He told his family that he wanted to meet her. They laughed and told him he was crazy. They said she would be dead within the hour. They took bets on how long she would live."

I noticed that Edward squeezed Bella's hand when he said that.

"His family now sees the error of their ways," he continued. "But at the time, they joked with him and did not see the real danger. The problem was that Nikolai had lived for centuries on nothing but human blood. He had never even tried to reign in his thirst. But now, he had fallen in love with a human. Deeply in love.

They did begin dating. The family was amazed that he was able to keep seeing her. First a week, then two weeks, and after a month they were shocked to see that she was still alive. Nikolai told his family that he was in love with her and that he wanted to stop drinking human blood and exist only on the blood of animals. He was concerned that Olivia was asking questions. She had become suspicious of the qualities that he had that were so unique. Olivia knew there was something different about him, and he wanted to tell her his secret. He wanted to become the best person he could be for her. He did not want to lose her."

Edward stopped for a moment. He swallowed hard and held tightly to Bella's hand. He looked gently at her for a moment, and then his look became hard as he lifted his face back up to me and continued.

"Nikolai had good intentions, but he was foolish, incredibly so. What he was attempting to do, takes decades to accomplish, even for the most dedicated vampire. The lure for human blood takes over all other senses, and there is never a guarantee even after decades of discipline that one will be able to endure the temptation."

He ran his hand so quickly over his face that it startled me. He was still angry as he continued.

"One night, Olivia and Nikolai were together. He was not careful. He let things go too far with Olivia and he was not able to . . . bring himself under control. Before he knew what had really happened, he had bitten her. He told himself he just wanted a taste. Once he began to drink her blood, he couldn't stop."

There was silence in the room. All that could be heard were the beeps and clicks of the machines I was hooked up to. Edward stared out into space lost in his own thoughts. And for the first time, I really understood. I finally grasped what it must have been like for Edward and Bella. I could finally comprehend how Edward could leave her for seven years and with as much as he loved her, believe that she was better off. I was finally able to understand that this was a kind of hell, a prison, to be locked in with this thirst that would always be your master.

And finally, finally, I was able to understand a small part of Tanya.

Edward's eyes looked into mine. I felt he was penetrating deeply into my thoughts as if he were looking for something. Why? Was he testing me, to see if I were really as genuine as I seemed? If I would keep their secret? Or was it something more?

I took a deep breath and pushed out a question. "Was it Nikolai that almost killed me?"

Edward stiffened as Bella shook her head hesitantly.

"No, it wasn't Nikolai." Edward said it quickly, his voice laced with pain. Then he finished the tale.

"Nikolai was overcome with grief over what he had done. His family tried to help him, but he was inconsolable. The day after Olivia died, he went to the Volturi and pleaded with them to kill him. They granted his request."

My eyes went wide with horror. I took shallow breaths and tried to understand this vampire world. This Volturi was twisted enough to kill a fellow vampire just because he asked them to?

And what about Nikolai? He loved Olivia enough to want to end his existence. He was all powerful, immortal, indestructible, yet he ended it over love. He couldn't go on without her. That, I understood.

"Wow," I breathed. That was sort of an understatement for all of this, but it was all I was capable of at the moment.

I turned to Edward. "If not Nikolai then . . . .?"

He didn't let me finish. He put out his hand to stop me and said, "It was his brother, Stefan."

Bella looked at me and said, "Stefan was already mourning Nikolai's death, they were a very tight coven. But we had spoken to the family and they realized that this was all Nikolai's doing, and they were at peace with that."

Her voice rose as she said, "That was until he saw the posters everywhere in the city, labeling his brother as a killer!"

I cringed at Bella. I was so sorry for the all of this. I was causing a lot of grief and trouble for a woman that didn't even want to see me again.

"Where is Stefan, now?" I gasped.

Edward's voice was flat. "He's dead."

This was all beginning to be too much to take.

All of the sudden, I thought of my family. My parents. Did they know something had happened to me? What about Hathaway?

I looked at Edward. "My family?"

"For the moment, your family and Mr. Hathaway believe that you were in a very serious car accident. Alice has taken care of that story. I am sorry to say that your Jaguar is wrapped around a tree somewhere between Moscow and Georgia."

My head lifted off the pillow for a moment and the pain made it drop back down again. I knew I deserved to have my dream car demolished after all the trouble I'd caused.

I looked at Edward with confusion. "For the moment?"

Edward looked at me evenly. "For now, they think that you are alive, but the Volturi, Alexei, and Stefan's remaining coven have already received the news that you are dead."

"Dead!" I tried to yell, but the strain sent spasms through my jaw. My chest was screaming at the air I tried to force into my lungs.

Edward voice became softer, but somehow more menacing, "You don't understand what you've done here, Michael. You have awaken a sleeping monster." He let go of Bella's hand and came and stood right next to me.

"Stefan's family is furious at you. They want vengeance. But that's not all. Alexei, otherwise known as Tsar Schlyvokk, is seeking out his own vengeance on the one that was responsible for almost letting out a secret that has been kept well hidden from the public for thousands of years."

I opened my mouth to speak, but Bella interrupted me.

"There's more. The Volturi is enraged that Alexei allowed this to happen. They are demanding he immediately step down as leader. They know he will not go quietly. That will start a full war between Alexei's vast following and The Volturi."

Edward spoke next. "If Stefan's coven, Alexei, and The Volturi don't believe that you are dead, they will soon begin the hunt to make sure that you are."

I was stunned into silence.

Edward said softly. "You have begun something that you will not be able to finish."

The machine measuring my heart rate began to beep out of control. I had only one worry. If I was in danger, was Tanya somewhere safe?

"Where's Tanya," I demanded.

"We're not talking about that." Edward shook his head adamantly.

"Tell me she's safe," I gasped through the pain.

Edward pushed the button that would bring in the nurse.

"Does she think I'm dead?" I gasped.

He ignored me.

"Please, Edward. Get her somewhere safe."

The nurse came in and Edward said that I was in a lot of pain and needed a sedative. She reached for a needle and began to insert it into my I.V.

I tried to fight it.

"No!" I said hoarsely.

"Tell her I'm sorry for everything."

"Tell her, tell . . . . . her . . . . . I. . . . love . . . . . . . .her."

With that, I lost the battle and slipped into a deep slumber.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

**Crap, Michael. You've really done it now! More answers tomorrow!**


	27. BELLA

**Okay, you were all too generous yesterday. To put it mildly, the last chapter pretty much sucked. What I have found is, that I have a real weakness in writing. I have a hard time when there is a lot of information I need to get out in one chapter. What I should have done is spread it all out in previous chapters. Maybe that would work better. I don't know! Today's chapter isn't my favorite, but I hope that it helps to redeem me. Please don't give up on me. Stay for tomorrow at least. It will be a payoff for you, I promise.**

**I will post early tomorrow.**

**Am I seriously at 1900 reviews? **

**I love you all. **

**- - - - - - - - - **

**Chapter 12 - BELLA**

From the way the sun shone outside the window, I could tell it was about noon. That was as close as I got to knowing the time. I didn't even know what day of the week it was. Coming from someone who used to know the time in several different countries at once, and working through every day of the week, lying in a bed for this long was not sitting too well with me.

I lay there listening to the heart monitor beside me. Its constant beep was just one more thing to annoy me. I had a list.

A nurse brought in something in a cup that was supposed to resemble food and checked the information on all the machines I was hooked up to. I was ecstatic when she informed me that I no longer needed the oxygen tube that was hooked to my nose. That thing was driving me crazy. It was #3 on my list of annoying things. If I had been able to make my hands work well enough, I probably would have pulled it out myself.

As she silently wrote down information on a clipboard I began a conversation.

"So, do I really need that obnoxious machine that beeps incessantly right next to my head?"

"It's your heart monitor," she said shortly.

"I know what it is. Do I really have to have it? It's driving me nuts," I complained.

"It's kind of important," she said as she looked at me through the corner of her eye.

"Can the volume be turned down, at least?" I grumbled. I was noticing that although my jaw still hurt, it was much easier to get the words out.

"No."

She helped me raise my head, while she stuck the cup in front of my face. I looked down into it with distaste.

"So when do I get to eat real food?" I asked impatiently.

"When you are able to feed yourself, for starters."

I looked at the creamy, frothy stuff in the cup that was meant to be my lunch. She sighed impatiently as she held the cup in front of me. I took a deep breath for courage and muttered, "Bottoms up." Then I drained the liquid through the thick straw as fast as I could.

I raised my eyebrows appraisingly. It wasn't half bad. Especially since it was the first solid food I had eaten since becoming conscious**. **The door suddenly opened and Bella walked into the room.

"Hey," she said quietly.

"How long was I out this time?"

"Almost 48 hours," she stated.

I blinked in surprise. I had no idea that it had been that long.

"Actually, I came in a few times to check on you, and I must say, I rather enjoyed it. It's been a long time since I've seen anyone sleep."

I looked into her face to see if she was bothered by that, but I saw no hint of regret. She leaned in on the bed and asked, "How are you feeling?"

I sighed and took inventory of myself and then said, "A lot better than the last time I was awake."

I could feel my heart beating in my head as it throbbed, and each time I inhaled I was stopped short by a crushing pain in my ribs. There was a new pain down the left side of my leg that I didn't remember from before, but I'm guessing it was because so many other pains overpowered it at the time.

"That is good news," she said.

There was a coldness to her that hadn't been there before my massively stupid stunt. She was still very angry. I could also tell she was very worried.

"So, do we know how the world of homicidal vampires has taken the news of my death, yet?"

She looked at me with a straight face. "There has been no report on any front. Everything has been eerily quiet."

"I don't even know where to start on an apology," I said sincerely.

Her teeth clenched as she spoke to me. "If I lose Edward in a battle because of your little love-sick stunt, I will kill you myself." I didn't doubt her for a second. But I did feel the need to defend myself.

"Saying this doesn't atone for my actions, but I was a little out of my mind, Bella. About a month ago, I found Tanya in Sochi and I told her I loved her. I confessed everything to her. She told me she loved me, too. Then she turned Alexei loose on me, while she ran away – again. I ended up drunk on some beach, and on the seven hour drive back to Moscow, this asinine plan was the only way I could think of getting her to come back to me."

"Committing suicide and starting a vampire turf war was the best you could come up with?"

"She told me she loved me, Bella. She held on to me so tightly, and then she was gone. You were gone. Anyone who knew anything about all this was gone. I was left alone to try and live a boring, normal, ordinary life. I woke up in the morning, did my job, and went to sleep for three or four hours before starting over again. I was dying slowly anyway. Do you have any idea what it's like to have everything that you love vanish, leaving you with nothing that you want?"

She swallowed hard as she stared hard at me.

"Actually I do. When Edward left, he took his whole family with him. Aside from my dad, everything I loved left in a matter of days."

"You were stronger than me," I said softly.

She shook her head slowly and I saw a hint of the haunted face I used to know so well.

"No, Simmons. You know the hell I was in. When he first left, there is a period of about three months that I don't remember a thing."

"At least you never did anything stupid or reckless, I argued.

I saw a small smile on her lips. It was there momentarily, and then it left. "I was reckless," she whispered. Her eyes were a million miles away. "I cheated and tried every reckless thing I could think of to keep him with me, just so that I could hear his beautiful voice. But with the passage of time, that left me too."

"We're quite a pair, aren't we?" I replied.

She bowed her head and chuckled. "Yeah, I guess we are."

"I don't remember the fairy tale where the handsome prince meets a beautiful vampire and lives happily ever after," I mused.

"It's because it's not supposed to happen that way," she argued.

"Then why do I want it so much?" I breathed.

She took my hand and I wrapped my warm fingers around her cold ones. She looked into my eyes and I thought of the journey each of us had been on in the past few years. Our lives had taken a turn I had never dreamed of. I never knew I could love another person the way I loved Bella. I never had a sister. Maybe this was how it felt to love a sister. All I knew, was that my life was better with her in it.

I rubbed the back of her hand and said, "I still have some questions."

She pursed her lips and nodded slightly. "I know. That's why I'm here."

I smiled. "Really? Because I have a lot of them."

Bella swallowed hard and pulled her hand back.

"You may not like all of my answers," she warned.

"I don't think I can be hurt any worse than when Tanya walked away from me in Sochi, and you certainly will leave me in better shape than Stefan did, so I think I can handle it."

She scoffed a little, and then she abruptly rose out of her chair and for a moment slowly walked around my room. She ended up pacing back and forth in the area at the foot of my bed.

"Edward told me this wasn't a good idea, and maybe he was right," she said in a worried tone.

My eyes followed her back and forth and it brought a smile to my face as I remembered how many times I had seen her pace just like that in the middle of the night while we came up with our brilliant strategies.

"It's just that I . . . ." She stopped speaking, but continued her pacing while I lay there waiting patiently. Experience had taught me that eventually she would get to it, she just had to deliberate and think it out in her own mind, and then she would get down to business.

"It's just that when I see two people suffering, two people that I care so much about, I think I would regret not doing something. You might find out someday, and then it might be too late, and you would never forgive me."

I listened to her babble on. She was making absolutely no sense. Soon, she was just pacing with her lips in a tight line. That was usually a sign that she was getting close to a resolution.

I swallowed hard. "Just tell me now, Bella. Whatever it is, I can handle it."

She looked down for a moment and then her eyes, which were a lovely shade of gold now, looked deep into mine.

"If you end up getting hurt from this, I am sorry," she said seriously.

I felt the fire in my middle. What if she told me that Tanya was with someone else, or that something had happened to her? I said I could handle whatever Bella had to tell me. I swallowed hard and watched as she walked up to the side of my bed and said, "Simmons, earlier you asked me who saved you from Stefan. You were right, it was Tanya."

For a second, the annoying heart monitor stopped, and then it sped up considerably. It was going faster and faster, keeping time with the pulsing throb in my head.

Bella glanced over at the machine and then back at me.

"I tell you stories of bloodthirsty vampires coming to kill you, and _this_ is what gets you excited?"

"Is she . . . ." I couldn't breathe deeply enough to finish. "Is she okay?"

I gasped for air. I was trying to calm down. I needed a steady head right now. My heart was beating too fast and it was forcing me to take deep breaths, which were excruciating.

"Bella, why did you wait so long to tell me? Is she all right? What about . . ."

"Whoa, whoa, calm down!" I was picturing Tanya fighting that murderous pyschopath. It wasn't helping me calm down.

"Crap." She shook her head at me. "I knew this was how you would react."

She looked anxiously at the heart monitor and said, "Relax. I'll tell you everything."

I concentrated on taking smaller breaths that didn't make me want to clench my teeth every time in inhaled.

She looked at me skeptically. "Are you sure you're up to this?"

I made an effort to slow my breathing. I didn't want her to leave anything out because she thought I wouldn't be able to handle it. I relaxed and said, "Bella, tell me everything."

She looked at me reassuringly as she said, "First of all, I want you to know that Tanya is all right."

I felt myself relax. "Are you sure?"

"Yes," she nodded, "She is fine."

She leaned in closer to me and said, "I think you need to know a little about what Tanya has been going through, so that you are able to understand the situation, okay?"

Was that okay? That was all I had wanted from the beginning. I had been tortured from not knowing anything, for months.

"It's more than okay, Bella," I answered forcefully.

Bella took a breath and began. "I must first go back to Nikolai, you remember him, right?"

How could I not remember? That story would probably haunt my dreams. I nodded so that she would keep going.

"Nikolai and Tanya had known each other for a very long time. They were very close friends. So much so, that Nikolai contacted her after he met Olivia. He wanted Tanya to teach him to withstand the craving of human blood."

"Well, Tanya panicked. She was in Denali, and felt helpless as Nikolai professed his love for Olivia and explained how he was sure he could withstand his thirst. Tanya tried to talk sense into him. She had him on the phone for over an hour explaining that this would take years, decades even, to perfect. Tanya told him that he was not ready to take this step and that he should make sure he was never alone with her."

"Nikolai scoffed at that. He said that his love was enough to make him stop. When Tanya heard the lack of concern in his voice, she demanded that Nikolai stay away from Olivia completely until she could get there and help him. She told him she would be on the next flight to Moscow."

"Nikolai promised that he would be careful, and that he was confident that he would be fine until she got there. He told Tanya that he would see her the next day, and that he couldn't wait for her to meet Olivia. The last thing Nikolai said to Tanya was that he'd had a fresh kill that day, and that he was sure that would be the last human he would ever taste."

"Tanya was in her car within fifteen minutes of hanging up the phone, and on a plane within the hour. But, when she got to Moscow, she could not reach him. She sped to his house, and there, learned that he was already on his way to the Volturi."

Bella took a deep breath before continuing.

"There was so much media coverage about Olivia's bizarre death, that The Russian Counsel intervened. They were a body of prestigious vampires that created a ruling counsel to judge disputes and help keep the peace. That made Alexei furious. He told them to stay out of it, that he could handle everything, but they disagreed. The Counsel saw this as a chance they might not get again. They had wanted Alexei gone for a long time; he was becoming too powerful, too indignant. They needed to stop him while they still could."

"The Counsel announced that there would be a tribunal. At this gathering, Alexei had to prove that he was still fit to rule. If it was proven that Alexei had been negligent and not taken the proper steps to warn Nikolai, he would be asked to step down."

Bella sat back in her chair and said, "And here is where Tanya enters the picture. Alexei ordered Tanya to go to the tribunal and lie for him. Alexei demanded that she swear to the fact that he was the one who asked Tanya to come and help Nikolai. This would prove to the Counsel that he had done his part to stop Nikolai. Alexei wanted her to lie to the Counsel to protect him."

"Did she do it?" I asked.

"Not at first, she refused to do it," Bella replied.

"Good for her." I was waiting for the part of the story that I wasn't supposed to like, so far I was nothing but proud of Tanya.

Bella nodded. "She did try to refuse, but in the end, it did no good. No one refuses Alexei. He just came looking for her, and he caught up with her in New York. He found her at the ball, where you saw him for the first time."

My breath caught. I was starting to put pieces together. "Did Tanya leave the ball with him? Is that why she left so quickly?" I asked.

Bella sighed hard. "She knew Alexei was waiting for her, and he is not the most patient of men."

I was confused. "I can see how Alexei could get her in front of the Counsel, but how could he get her to actually lie for him?"

From what I'd seen, Tanya was far too strong a person to just cave in and do anything she didn't want to do.

Bella's face became angry. "In the end, he used leverage. He blackmailed her into doing what he wanted."

I felt my heart begin to hurt. She had been going through so much. I hadn't been wrong when I felt that she was in danger, that she needed help.

"What would he have to blackmail her with, Bella." I was ready for anything. At least I hoped I was.

"Thirty-eight years ago, nine members of the Counsel were mysteriously killed. Most believed that Alexei was responsible because those nine members were trying to oust him and put in someone else that they could easily control, but no one was ever able to prove anything. To this day, no one has ever found the killer."

"How did he blackmail, Tanya?" I asked impatiently.

"Alexei threatened to tell the Counsel that he had proof that it was Tanya and her sisters, Irina and Kate, that killed the nine men."

"How could he prove something that wasn't true?" I asked desperately.

"Alexei was confident he could persuade the Counsel to believe him because Tanya and her sisters had a motive."

"What was the motive?" I asked thickly.

Bella's look was serious. "Tanya's mother broke a very serious law. Those nine murdered members of the Volturi were part of the group that exposed her and turned her in to the Volturi. The Volturi ended up killing her."

There was so much to take in. I couldn't even wrap my mind around it all.

"Simmons, you have to know a few things," Bella continued. "Alexei didn't stop at demanding Tanya lie before the Counsel. He has used that same leverage to keep her at his side for months."

"Alexei demanded she take care of the Zach Conner situation. She was supposed to take him somewhere far away and kill him, but instead she took him somewhere safe, away from Alexei's watchful eye. She has virtually cut off all communication with her sisters, Edward's family, and anyone else she cares about because she has been trying to protect them from Alexei."

I could feel the desperation growing inside of me. The feeling that I had to get to her. I had to make her realize that she wasn't in this alone. That she never had to be alone again. That for me, ever since I first saw her, my heart had always been with her.

"How did you find out about all of this," I asked hoarsely.

"We got to the hospital and found her waiting outside the room where Carlisle had you in surgery. Luckily, he had been at a conference in Kiev, and came right when Tanya called. She told us everything. She was so worried about you, Simmons. She made Edward and I promise that we would keep you safe. She also made me swear that I would never tell you any of this."

Bella chuckled. "The first promise I'll keep. The second? Well, I guess I blew that one."

"I feel so helpless against all of this," I whispered.

"I want you to know that she has looked over you. This stupid stunt you pulled has caused her a lot of problems. She tried to keep Alexei and Stefan from finding out who informed the police. She wouldn't dare contact you for fear of bringing their wrath down on you. She was trying to appease them both, but in the end, she had to call Zach Conner and tell him to warn you, then she frantically went in search for you."

I lay there trying to calculate exactly what all my selfishness had done. I had let my self-pity take over my senses, and now Tanya was paying for it.

"After she killed Stefan, she was so worried about getting you to Carlisle, that she didn't take the time to take care of Stefan's remains. She went back there, after your surgery, and found two members of his coven waiting."

"Bella . . ."

"She fought them both off, but before she could escape, she was injured . . . ."

"No!" I cried. I rose up in the bed and something pulled in my stomach. I fell back with a groan. It felt like something had ripped my insides. I was twisting in pain as I yelled, "Where is she! Tell me she's all right!"

Bella stood up and held me down with force. I absolutely couldn't move my shoulders at all. She looked deep in my eyes and said forcefully, "Calm down, Simmons. She's okay, she's fine."

"What have I done? Bella, what have I done? She is never going to forgive me for this. If I ever had a chance, it's gone now. I've ruined everything."

Her eyes narrowed slightly. "If I let go of you are you going to freak out again?"

"No," I groaned. She was pushing so hard on my shoulders that it was getting hard to breathe. My stomach was burning with pain.

"It's funny that you should say that she'll never forgive you. That's exactly what she said to me, that you would never forgive _her_," Bella said as she relaxed in her seat again.

"What?" I whispered.

Bella's voice became very quiet. "She never wanted to be there when you found out what she was. She dreaded that moment when your look of love and desire turned to horror and disgust."

I wanted to protest, but that was actually pretty close to what happened.

"She stayed away in part to protect you, but in part to protect herself. She wanted your life to stay pure and full of promise, and if she was selfish and stayed, she was sure that she would slowly drive you away."

"I would never leave," I protested.

"She is sure you will," Bella countered. "She is sure that one day when you are old and gray you will look back and resent her for spending your life with her and having so much taken away."

"I wouldn't be wasting my years," I said quickly. "I would be become a vampire for her and stay with her, I . . . "

"Be serious, Simmons," she said with a shake of her head.

I stared at her for a moment. "You don't think I'm being serious? You of all people should know how I feel."

"You're right, of all the people in the world I should be the one to tell you that this should end now."

"Why is it all right for you, but not for me? Why do you get forever with _your_ destiny, and never-ending happiness, but I am supposed to walk away?"

"Because this is permanent, Simmons. 200 years from now you can't ask to be changed back."

I looked at her with mock horror. "You mean there isn't some magic elixir that will take away the evil spell if I change my mind?" I sneered at her. "What kind of fool do you think I am, Bella?"

"Look, I'm just saying that this is . . ."

I interrupted her. "I know perfectly and absolutely what this means for me. I am telling you . . . " I stopped and swallowed hard. "I can't live without her, Bella. I need her. I don't want anything else but her. Every other choice is so empty, so barren. There is no purpose in any of it. Do you understand?"

She looked at me then. Her golden eyes searched mine until she finally sighed and said, "Yes. I understand."

I relaxed, but then she said, "But Tanya will not understand. She will never relent to your desire to become a vampire."

"She will in time," I argued.

"No, she won't. She is pretty stubborn," she replied.

"Yeah, I know," I said forcefully.

"Simmons," she breathed. "I need you to listen to me carefully. It's over. I know that it's tough to hear that. But it's better that it's coming from someone who loves you. You have a whole life ahead of you, and I know it's hard to see that right now, but you have to start accepting that the two of you are never going to be."

"Bella, tell me where she is," I asked softly. The pain in my stomach was beginning to spread.

"I can't tell you that," she said flatly.

"Can't or won't," I pressed.

She sighed in frustration. "I can't _and_ I won't."

"That didn't make any sense," I argued.

She sighed and looked down.

"You always do this." I said accusingly. "You always withheld information that the lawyers needed until the last possible second just to make them angry and show them you were in charge. You even did it to me."

"No I didn't," she countered.

"Ha! When you saw Edward for the first time at the Waldorf, you were crying when you left. The next morning I asked you like, fifty times if you still loved Edward, and you wouldn't tell me a thing."

"I finally did," she replied.

"Finally, ha!" I laughed. "It was easier for WWII German soldiers to torture secrets out of the enemy."

"It wasn't that bad," she muttered.

"Pffhhh," I huffed.

She reached up and touched my arm. I could feel how cold she was even through my bandages. "It's not my place to tell. But don't you see the obvious? If she wanted to see you, she would be here right now."

"Not if she were trying to protect me." I said dryly.

My head was feeling very heavy, and my eyes felt like there were lead weights on them. I had just slept for two straight days and I couldn't figure out why I was suddenly so tired.

"You don't give up all that easily, do you?" She asked, slightly annoyed.

"Not when it matters to me," I replied.

"Maybe I'm a fortune-teller like Alice after all," she said with a smile.

My forehead knotted in confusion. "Alice can see the future? What are you talking about?"

"Well, when you helped me move my apartment I said that someday you would go to the ends of the Earth for a girl that you loved, and well, my prediction sort of came true."

I stared at her incredulously. "I didn't come to Russia because of Tanya. I came here because Hathaway demanded that I come."

"I didn't say it was exactly the same," she said defensively.

I sighed and said, " I have one more question for you."

"Okay."

"How in the hell does a vampire become a doctor?"

She burst out laughing and it sounded like tinkling bells.

"I mean, was he a doctor first, and then a vampire? What about the whole blood thing?" I persisted.

The nurse came in then. She checked my machines and then took my blood pressure, and her face looked concerned. A few minutes later, Carlisle came in.

"I'm sorry to cut this short, but there are some tests I need to do on our patient here, and they really can't wait."

Bella immediately stood up, she seemed relieved to be leaving, and not to have to answer any more of my questions.

"Where are you going?" I demanded.

"You heard Carlisle, I have to go." She said innocently.

My eyes widened as I argued. "Carlisle, there's no reason she can't stay, right? I just have a few more questions for her."

Carlisle looked at me apologetically. "She can't stay Michael. I will be doing blood tests, and I wouldn't want to put you in any danger."

It was hard to imagine me being in any danger from Bella. I was sure she could withstand being near my blood, couldn't she? I looked over at Bella and she was staring at Carlisle, avoiding my gaze.

"Bella?" I asked.

She turned her eyes to me and I wasn't sure what I saw there. "I need to leave," she said.

"Are you leaving because my blood is too much of a temptation, or because you don't want to answer my questions?"

Her hand went on her hip and she said defensively, "Drinking your blood would be like kissing my brother, but I still wouldn't take any sort of chance with you, okay?"

I guess I looked anxious, because she rolled her eyes and said, "You can finish interrogating me later."

She began her walk to the door, and I said, "Bella, don't count me and Tanya out yet. Destiny is a hard thing to avoid."

She looked at me with a slight smile and waved as she walked out the door.

Carlisle looked down at me with a reassuring smile. "There are a few things I see here that are concerning me. I am going to run a few tests, but first, I am going to take your blood, and you don't need to worry, you will be perfectly safe."

I held my arm up in his direction. He gripped my wrist and I was shocked at how chilled his fingers were. I had to remember that vampires came in many different varieties in Bella's world. I turned my head when the needle went in, and when I looked back, he was already done. He quickly put a cotton ball on my wound and a band-aid. Then with a smile, he left.

I had a few more tests done by nurses, and he returned about 20 minutes later with a troubled look on his face. He sat down in the chair by my bed and said, "Your blood count has gone way down, and your blood pressure has dropped alarmingly. My guess is that you are bleeding internally, either from the injuries to your liver, or your kidney. We won't know until we get in there and look around."

"But I feel fine," I lied. My stomach had grown increasingly more painful since he left. "Are you saying I need surgery?"

"Right now," he nodded.

With that, a nurse entered the room and they wheeled me down the hall. Suddenly Bella came tearing around the corner. She was looking anxiously at Carlisle.

"Edward just told me, is it serious?"

Carlisle didn't stop walking while he spoke. "I believe he's bleeding internally. It could be serious. I just don't know yet."

Bella looked down at me quickly and then back up to Carlisle, "Well, how long do you think the surgery will last?"

They had slowed down and were turning a corner that led into another room. It was white and sterile. Exactly like a hospital.

"I won't know until I get in there," he said with concern. He then turned to me. "The nurse will get you prepped for surgery, and I will return shortly."

Bella was standing out in the hall, barred from entering because of the concern of spreading any bacteria. Before the door swung shut Bella called out, "He's the best doctor there is, Simmons. Don't worry, you'll be fine."

I could see her through the little rectangle window in the door and I raised my hand and gave her a thumbs up, and then I turned away. This wasn't going to get mushy. The nurse began hooking me up to various machines and then scrubbed down my abdomen with a foul smelling cold liquid. Shortly after, a man came in and informed me he was the anesthesiologist. Another I.V. went in, and I quickly became very tired.

Carlisle returned to my bedside. His mouth was covered with a mask, and he was holding his hands up to keep them sterile. He looked down at me and said, "Everything will be all right."

I wondered how my death would change anything. If I didn't make it through this surgery, Bella and Edward would still be in their own little world, she would be fine. I talked to my parents sporadically at best, they had a perfect son and grandchildren to keep them happy. Hathaway would find a replacement for me within a day.

Would Tanya truly be affected if I ceased to exist?

My eyes drifted shut and I forced them open one more time. "I trust you, Doc."

I was going to make it through this surgery. After everything, it couldn't really end like this. I would find Tanya. I would show her that I loved her for the person she was, for the beauty that was _inside_ of her.

I tried one more time to fight the heavy blanket that was overtaking me, and then I was out.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

**Sorry that two chapters ended with Simmons passing out from drugs. What did you think? I like the chapter tomorrow, it's probably my favorite . . . . . . . . . . . . .**


	28. ANGEL

**This has been an amazing experience. I can't even describe what it feels like to click on that button that will put up a new chapter. I cringe every time. And then, from all around the world, you read what I have written, and you are encouraging and helpful ( and sometimes tough), and it is the most amazing thing. I will be so sad when this is over. There are no friends, like twilight friends. There are three chapters left, and an epilogue. You all rock! **

**Chapter 13 - ANGEL**

** - - - - - - - - - - - - - -**

I awoke to a strange feeling.

It was completely dark and quiet except for the steady beat of that dang heart monitor that let out a strange green glow. I had no idea how long I had been out this time. I lay there slowing coming out of my daze and once again had great appreciation for the sleep and pain medication Carlisle was giving me. Whatever it was, it was pretty good stuff.

I expected the peculiar feeling I had when I awakened to leave as the grogginess went away, but it stayed. Now that I was more alert, I realized what the feeling was. It felt like someone was in the room with me. I didn't feel alone. I had the urge to call out, but I felt foolish, so I just lay there waiting for my eyes to adjust to the penetrating darkness.

My body fidgeted as I tried unsuccessfully to find a comfortable position. I was restless from being in the bed for so long. After making an effort to shift my body three or four times and feeling sharp stabs of pain flash across my chest, and now also my abdomen, I finally gave up. I sighed hard, and that hurt my chest too.

So, there was nothing to do but just lay there. I never got the chance to process all the information Bella gave me about Tanya. Now, it was all coming back to me. It was hard. Extremely hard, to think that Tanya was going through so much alone. I just wanted so badly to talk to her. To try once more to convince her that I would never love anyone the way I loved her.

I couldn't believe that she had been watching me since I came to Moscow. I silently wondered if Tanya had followed me into that night club in Sochi. I never could shake the feeling that it was more than mere coincidence that we were there at the same time.

I shook my head as I tried to reconcile the gentle Tanya I knew, with the one that would be indestructible enough to kill Stefan. I also chided myself again for all the fantasies I'd had of protecting her and keeping her safe. It seemed that she was quite capable of taking care of herself.

What if Bella was right? What if I had to accept it was over and move on? How was any girl ever going to measure up to this? How did Tanya think I was ever going to fall in love with anyone else when she kept finding ways to come into my life? Could I ever be confident that she wasn't following me? If it was really over between us, then that was something I had to resolve before I left this place. It would be just too much for my mind to constantly have to fight. Wondering if she was out there, somewhere, close by.

Perhaps, that matter was already resolved. Now that the vampire world thought I was dead. The danger was gone, and so was she.

I had a new emotion now, and it was a little surprising. It was anger. I was angry that she always managed to have the upper hand in what happened between us. Angry that she could feel justified in predicting I would one day leave and stop loving her because she was a vampire. I was angry that we had never had more than a fleeting moment together, but she had somehow managed to assume that my feelings were short-lived and shallow, and that I had not stopped to look into her heart.

Then suddenly, from the darkest corner of the room, someone hesitantly stepped out of the shadows. For a moment, I panicked at who would be waiting in the middle of the night for me. I could only guess it was another homicidal vampire, but then, I heard her voice.

"Hello, Michael."

It was Tanya.

Like clockwork, the heart monitor began speeding up erratically. As if it wasn't already painfully obvious that I was hopelessly in love with her.

"Hello, Tanya."

"I hope I didn't wake you," her voice was like a breeze that came at the end of a long hot day.

"No," I struggled to keep my voice even. "If you hadn't stepped out just now, I never would have known you were there." I smiled a little and said, "You just can't seem to stay away from me, can you?"

She started at that comment. She looked away with an embarrassed look on her face, and I breathed in and said softly, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that. What I should have said was, thank you for saving my life."

She looked down and smiled then. I wanted so much for her to come closer. Having her near me was a gift in any form. Very softly I said, "Please, would you come and sit down?"

She smiled again. With the pale green light, her skin was illuminated in a beautifully supernatural way as she came closer. As I had every time I saw her, I was amazed at her perfection and again berated myself for even thinking that she could ever belong to me. I couldn't even run after her now, and I painfully accepted that as I lay helpless in this bed, I would have no hold on keeping her here for long.

My mind flashed through all Edward and Bella had told me. How she was being forced through blackmail, to do Alexei's bidding, and how she had fought to keep me safe.

"You've been busy," I replied.

She raised an eyebrow, "So have you."

Fair enough, I thought.

"Bella warned me that she spoke with you," she said with a sigh.

I smiled. "We had a nice talk, until my liver or kidney or whatever it was, interrupted."

She smiled for just a moment and I thought how I wanted to make her smile everyday for the rest of my life.

"Tanya, I am so sorry for all the trouble I've caused you. There doesn't seem to be enough words to describe how truly horrible I feel for what I've put you through."

She looked at me with sadness, but there was no anger on her face. "The difficulties I have had were set in motion long before you were born. There is no reason for you to feel regret for anything."

"I exposed Nikolai to the entire city of Moscow, and forced you to kill someone you were close to," I said remorsefully.

"I was never close to Stefan," she said harshly. "He was a mean and cruel fool who never understood anything but his thirst."

I watched her for a moment. She was looking away from me. She was sitting back in the chair, so that she was as far away from me as possible.

She was upset, and I didn't know how long I would have her close to me. I wanted to make this meeting a sweeter one for both of us.

"It's a surprise to see you here," I said quietly.

She sighed heavily and said, "Bella told me about your emergency surgery. I have been here waiting for you to wake up. I wanted to know for myself that you were all right."

I was sure it was just my wishful imagination, but she seemed different somehow. Less guarded, less ready to run away from me as soon as my head was turned. It thrilled me to an alarming degree that she had been worried about me and was here waiting for me to wake up. The heart monitor picked up on my delight, and again spiked and quickened.

"How long have you had to wait?"

She looked down, a little timid about answering. "I haven't really been keeping track of the time. I think the surgery was yesterday, but you were just taken off the medication that was making you sleep a few hours ago."

"How are you?" I asked softly.

She raised her eyebrows at me, "You just came out of a life threatening surgery and you want to know how _I _am? How about I tell you what Carlisle found when he operated on you."

Actually, all I really cared about was that I was alive, and that Tanya was close to me. Everything else was annoying details. I swallowed hard against the dryness of my throat and said, "You can if you want, but I would really like to know how you are doing, and what happened with Stefan."

She shook her head angrily. "I am fine, Michael. Not a scratch on me. You on the other hand, nearly died in my arms." She choked back a sob as she looked at me. She sighed hard and continued.

"Do you even know the extent of the damage to your body? Bella told me that you've never even asked about your injuries. You have a broken femur on your left leg, and a broken ankle, and fibula on your right. Your left arm is broken in three places, and may never be the same. You have five broken ribs, and a broken collarbone. You had a serious concussion, and your jaw is all but wired back together. And that doesn't even include the internal injuries."

"Wow, I think I've heard enough," I interrupted. "I was feeling pretty good until you started telling me all the things that were wrong with me."

"Don't make a joke out of this, Michael," She said sternly.

I just loved hearing her say my name. Besides if I got too serious, there was a chance she would leave.

"Fine, I won't make a joke out of it. Did Carlisle say that I'm going to live?"

"Yes," she said petulantly.

"Well, then everything turned out all right then," I said reassuringly.

She gave me a scoff as she folded her arms and looked away. I watched her and wondered what I would do when I no longer had the original to gaze upon. Both of the other times I had been with her, I had not tried to commit all of her to memory. Foolishly, I thought I had all the time in the world with her. I would take much better care of these memories. I thought of all the things I would later chastise myself for not saying to her. I closed my eyes and tried to picture myself an old man. What would I have wished I'd said to her? What question would plague me to have answered? I knew there was one question that would haunt me above all the others.

"Tanya."

"Yes." She still kept her head turned.

"Why didn't you just change me into a vampire?"

Her head shot around and the look on her face was pure shock and anger.

"How dare you say that to me," she almost hissed.

"If I were a vampire, would you stay with me?" I had to know this. She could leave at any moment, and I had to know if there was a chance for me in any form.

She shot out of her chair and I thought she was heading for the door, but she stopped at the foot of my bed and paced for a moment and then swung to face me. Her eyes were like dark cauldrons of heat.

"You have no idea what you are saying, Michael."

What I had no idea about, was that she was capable of such a temper. With all the pacing and the anger, she was beginning to remind me of another female vampire I knew.

"On the contrary, Tanya, I know exactly what I'm saying. You told me I almost died in your arms. If you had changed me right then, I would be a vampire by now. It would mean I was as unbreakable as you are. I am just wondering if the only reason you keep sprinting away from me is because I'm human. Now, if it's because you aren't attracted to me, or you're in love with someone else, those things I can't do anything about. But this little problem of my immortality, well, that's something I can fix."

"_Little problem of your immortality_?" She repeated through clenched teeth. Her eyes were blazing. She looked so beautiful.

"Tanya, please answer my question. I could start a library full of the volumes of questions you leave behind for me every time you disappear."

Her face softened. "I'm sorry about that."

"Why did you come here tonight, Tanya?" I asked flatly.

"Because I was worried about you, I already said that," she answered impatiently.

"Did you think I might die?"

She turned her head angrily and said, "We're not having this conversation."

"Why?"

"Because what I want, or what I am personally going through will have no bearing on your life."

Why did she stubbornly stick to the notion that she had to be alone?

"Tanya," I said softly. "I need to explain to you what _I_ have been going through."

I was going to try to describe what my life was like without her. I was going to be skirting a thin line between looking like I was madly in love and just plain pathetic. I wanted to wait until she turned to look at me before I would tell her. When I knew her eyes were on mine, I began.

"At night, you are the last image I see before I fall asleep. When I awake, I awake to your face. All day long I am plagued by images and memories and fantasies of you. I see myself kissing you over and over during the day. I imagine touching your face and running my fingers down the small of your back."

She sighed hard and had folded her arms tightly across her chest. She was forcefully shaking her head, silently asking me to stop.

I didn't stop. "Your scent never leaves me. Your eyes never leave me. I don't see anyone. Just you. There is never going to be anyone else, Tanya. For the rest of my life there will only be you. So, this little thing about immortality . . ." I laughed darkly. "Sentencing me to a life without you is no different than you just leaving me to die in that alley. They are one and the same."

I had pretty much laid it all out on the table. When she left now, there would be no doubt for her what she was leaving me with. Her eyes were burning with gold and her face was somehow flushed as she came and sat in the chair by my bed again. She swallowed hard as she took her cold hand and laid it on mine. As soon as she touched me the heart machine began its little dance.

"Any woman would wait a lifetime to hear those words said to them," she breathed. "But, I am not a woman, I am a vampire. I don't have the luxury of being able to just fall in love with anyone and grow old with them. Don't you understand?"

I weakly held her fingers and spoke fervently. "Don't you understand? Why can't you see what is so obvious to me?"

I had lifted my head, and had to stop talking from the exertion. Tanya looked at me anxiously. I laid my head back down as I took a deep breath and pushed on.

"The first moment I saw you from clear across the room I knew you were the one. A voice spoke to me so clearly. It was as if someone was standing near me and whispered in my ear. It said just one word, and I can neither forget it nor deny it."

"What did it say?" She whispered.

"Destiny."

Her head went down and she laid her granite cheek on my hand. Her eyes were closed and her chest heaved.

"Destiny comes in many forms, Michael." She said sadly.

"I remember that night how you spoke about fate, and how it could be cruel. Tanya, I realize that you feel that you are doomed by your circumstances, but I don't feel that way. It led us to each other. It led me to you."

She raised her head. Her chin was turned up in defiance as she said, "I may not be in control of my destiny, but I am putting myself in control of yours. This will not happen to you, no matter what voice I heard."

She immediately realized that she had said too much. I squeezed her hand. She sighed with her head down and her eyes closed.

"Yes, Michael. I heard it too." She spoke so softly I wasn't sure if I just imagined it.

"What did you say?" I gasped.

She turned to me and opened her eyes, and they were burning into mine.

"I heard it too."

I had always wondered. If one person is your destiny, don't you have to be theirs as well?

"Sudba," I said softly. "That's why you said that to me at the club."

She laid her head back down so that her forehead was resting on my hand. She took a deep breath and said haltingly, "What if . . . what if you stayed with me and lived your life out as a human?"

"No." I said adamantly.

Although the fact that she was thinking in these terms at all, was thrilling, all-encompassing. It was the first glimpse I had that all these months I had not been living on just some mad hope.

"Please, Michael. I need you to think this through." I could feel her cold breath on my skin. I was almost willing to say yes just to appease her. Almost.

"No Tanya, I want all of you."

She kept a tight hold on my hand and brought her face up to mine. "You would have all of me. I would give you every part of me."

I had to blink my eyes to stop the yearning inside me for all she just said. But I shook my head and brought my hand up to touch her face. My thumb ran along her cheek and her eyes closed momentarily. "No, Tanya. You know as well as I do that I can't have all of you unless I'm a vampire too."

"I have had decades to come to terms with what I am, and I am still not sure. Michael, you are so full of life. That night at the ball, you filled up the room with your smile. You deserve all the good things that life can bring you."

"You like my smile?" I interrupted.

The side of her mouth went up as she tried to be serious. "You know I do."

"Actually, I had no idea. What else do you like about me?"

"Michael . . ." She was rolling her eyes with embarrassment.

"I love your hair," I offered. "I've never seen anyone with hair the exact color of yours." I reached out and ran a piece of it between my thumb and forefinger. "Now it's your turn."

She laughed under her breath and said, "Very well, I love your nose."

"My nose!" I laughed incredulously. Well, I tried to laugh. I had to stop because it hurt way too much.

"I'm being serious," she defended. "I especially like it from the side. It is a good strong nose."

"You're only saying that because it is the only bone on me that isn't broken, but okay, now it's my turn." I sighed and said softly. "I love your lips. I crave them actually."

She looked at me. Through her eyes, I could see the war within her. Her chest moved up and down rapidly, then before I knew what was happening, she was there. Her lips were on mine so gently it was like a moth's wing.

"Am I hurting you?" She breathed.

I groaned and pushed her lips hard onto mine. I wanted so much to hold her with both of my arms, to pin her against me. But all I could do was put my one weak hand on her face and neck. Luckily for me, it seemed she wanted to be there.

After a few moment, she pulled back and said, "We better stop. Someone is going to hear that machine and come charging in here thinking you're having a heart attack."

I waited until I caught my breath and then said, "I think you are a better doctor than Carlisle. I feel so much better now."

She laughed and it was like music. She sat in her chair and sighed. "Why can't it always be this way between us?"

"I've been trying my best, but you keep running away," I countered. Then I grabbed her hand and said, "Tanya, we are guaranteed a thousand lifetimes of this if you just make me a vampire."

She sighed hard and closed her eyes. She shook her head sadly and breathed, "I won't give in on this, Michael. I won't make you a monster."

"You're not a monster," I argued. "If you make me a vampire, I promise to be a good one, like you."

She abruptly stood up again. It was hard to keep up with her mood swings.

"_Not a monster_?" She emphasized each word as she all but hissed at me.

"Tell me honestly, Michael. When you first learned that I was a vampire, what was your reaction?"

"It doesn't matter, I . . ."

"Yes, it does matter. That night at the ball, the way you looked at me," she stopped and closed her eyes for a moment.

"The way you held me, you were so gentle, you were so beautiful about everything. And all I kept thinking was, how your look would change to horror and revulsion if you knew what I really was. If you knew what monster of a vampire was waiting for me by the entrance."

She moved a step back from me and continued. "You have no idea what I really am, you only see a woman with a pretty face, and figure and you have no idea what I am inside."

I opened my mouth to protest, but she apparently wanted to keep convincing me of what a horrible creature she was.

She clenched her teeth together and said, "You have no idea how close you really came to death that night with Stefan. No idea at all."

She was pacing again when she turned and said, "You were lying there in that alley . . . .Stefan was bending over you. I could smell your . . . I could smell your blood clear out on the street. When I reached you, I almost joined with Stefan in the feeding frenzy rather than save you." She slowly turned to me. She looked so ashamed as she watched my face. "Yes, Michael. You heard me. I almost _helped_ him."

"But you didn't." I was using all my strength to keep my voice even. But the heart machine was giving me away.

"And after I killed Stefan, there you were. It would have been so easy. Your blood, it . . . it calls to me. You don't even know what it was like that night at the ball when in one ear I heard 'Destiny' and in the other ear the monster was screaming 'Take it! You will never have anyone else's blood sing to you like this.' Her face was tortured as she finished. "It was like you were a gift in two very different, but two very powerful ways."

She turned to face me then, full of self-loathing. It was like she was standing in front of her accuser and ready to take any punishment I would give. Through the shame and horror on her face, she raised an eyebrow and said softly, "How pretty am I now? When you know that my looks are for nothing else than just to draw you in. That's all I am. I am nothing but a vampire."

I wanted to go to her, to wrap her in my arms. It was beyond frustrating being imprisoned by this bed. I understood so much more now. She had run away from me that night because of her horror at wanting me, _and_ wanting my blood. Wouldn't that be enough to keep a sane man away? And yet, I couldn't stay away.

It was true, I had been flippant about all of this. In reality, I knew that asking her to make me a vampire, well, it was huge. This was no small thing I was considering. Up until now, I had only considered what the cost would be of not having her, and not the cost of getting everything I wanted. If she agreed to change me, would I be like this? Constantly fighting down the urge to kill? Still, the thought of leaving her was almost too painful to consider. I shrank away from it, I couldn't bear it.

"But I am alive," I argued. "I am here because of you. Because of your caring and your unselfishness. You are the most amazing, fantastic, warm, and loving woman I have ever, or will ever know." I grinned. "You are also the most maddening, frustrating, and challenging woman I will ever know. And I know Bella, so that's saying a lot."

She stared at me, with both astonishment and confusion. "I just told you that I have an extreme desire to drink your blood and instead of ordering me out of this room and out of your life, you _compliment_ me? Have you always been so reckless and stupid?"

I grinned, "No. Actually I haven't. I guess you bring out those qualities in me."

She looked at the ceiling and let out a frustrated gust of air. "Michael, I would never forgive myself if something happened to you. To see you laying there pale and lifeless, it would be just . . . ." She was getting that desperate look in her eyes again.

"Hey," I interjected. "I'm alive, look at me?" You have been here with me all this time, and except for that brief, but fantastic moment when you were kissing me, you have stayed on the other side of room. Would you please come over here? I want to ask you something."

She walked over and gracefully lowered herself in the chair beside me. I reached out for her hand, and she placed hers in mine.

"Look, I am not asking you to change me right now, but I am asking you this. . . . . . .. please, can you just stay with me? Let's try for a day, and then if that goes well, then let's give it a week. All I want is a chance. If I end up having to go the rest of my life without you, I need to know that we tried to make it work and that I had you in my life for more than one night at ball, and one hour in Sochi."

There was a look of panic in her eyes. "Michael, I don't . . . ."

"You love me," I stated.

She opened her mouth to protest, and I stopped her.

"No, you can't back out of that now. At the nightclub in Sochi you told me you love me, and I am holding you to it. Now, what I want to know, is this." I took a deep breath, well, as deep as I could without wincing in pain. "Tanya, what do you love more, my blood, or me?"

She closed her eyes and sighed. "I guess I deserve that," she whispered. She still held tightly to my hand, then she brought the other hand up to gently touch my face. She looked right into my eyes and said, "I love _you_. The fact that you're alive right now should more than attest to that, but I understand why you had to ask. I'm just sorry you felt the need to ask it at all."

I felt like all the hurt and worry and desperation I felt the last long months just dissolved away with her words. I began trying to move. She sat up straight, startled at what I was doing. I groaned as I struggled to slide over. It seemed like such a simple thing, but the pain was taking my breath away.

"What are you doing?" She asked anxiously.

I finally laid my head back down on the pillow, weak and tired from the exertion. I patted the bedside next to me and said, "Come and lay by me."

She opened her mouth to argue with me and I looked at her sternly. "Did you see what I just went through? I just endured extreme physical pain just so that you would have room to lay beside me, are you really going to say no?"

One side of her mouth turned up and she moved up to the bed and began to climb on. She worked to move all my tubes so that she wouldn't pull anything out of me, and relaxed by my side. I lay flat and she turned on her side so that we could look at eachother. I wanted so badly to take advantage of this situation, but all I could do was look at her and hold her hand.

I kissed her fingers and said, "You are going to be amazed at how quickly I heal from all this. No one has ever been as motivated as I am to get better."

She smiled and ducked her head down into my shoulder. I rested my chin on her head. She smelled like nothing I could ever describe. I felt intoxicated, dazed by her nearness.

"I am actually really pleased that you told me how you are attracted to me in two ways," I said softly. "I want you to tell me everything. You can talk to me about anything, okay?" She nodded her head into my shoulder.

She swallowed hard and said, "What about children, Michael. I would never be able to give you children."

I took a moment to answer. "Actually, I have thought very seriously about that," I said slowly. "I will admit, that in the beginning I had our lives planned out. I saw a little girl with just your color of hair."

Tanya made a small cry of pain.

I turned and kissed her forehead as I whispered. "I would never want anyone to be the mother of my child but you. If it can't be you, then I will never want children. I just want you, Tanya. Just you."

She sighed hard and she gripped harder to my hand as she breathed in and out.

"I know this sounds really strange," I said a little self-consciously, "Given the current circumstances. But I want to take care of you, Tanya. I want to protect you and defend you. I want to be your safe harbor in this world."

I paused to see if she would find what I said, silly or insincere. But she lifted up on one elbow and stared at me with a look that I could only hope was mirrored in my eyes back to her.

She put her hand under my chin and kissed me. I knew my body was broken, but I had never felt so whole, so complete.

The heart monitor, of course, began speeding up erratically, and she grinned against my mouth.

"You don't happen to have a hammer with you, by chance?" I murmured. "I really hate that machine. Just when I think I'm being so cool with you, that beeping keeps giving me away."

She laid her hand very gently on my chest. "Actually," she whispered, "I can tell you the exact moment I first heard your heart."

I looked at her quizzically.

"When I walked up to the table at the ball that night, I held out my hand to you. You took my hand and kissed it. Your heart was pounding, and I have been hearing it play over and over in my mind ever since."

She looked from my chest up to my face. She kissed my forehead, my eyelids, and my nose. Her lips slid back down to my mouth and I tried so hard to answer every question she seemed to be asking.

She lay her head back down by my shoulder and whispered, "Go to sleep now, okay?"

I stiffened and panicked. If she left now, what would I ever do?

She took my hand and pulled it with hers down into her neck and said gently. "I promise I'll be here when you wake up."

I kissed the top of her head, taking in her potent perfume. I then closed my eyes and finally after so many nights without her, I fell asleep with my angel in my arms.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

**Big exhale. . . . . . tell me what you think! See ya tomorrow!**


	29. RULES

**Wow! We are almost done. This has been so much fun! **

**There is one thing Michael doesn't know yet, he doesn't know that Tanya used to have a thing for Edward. Hmmmmm. **

**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -**

**Chapter 14 - RULES**

Amazingly enough, Tanya and I made it through that first day.

Now, four weeks later, I was healing quickly. Carlisle was very pleased by my progress. I had a walking cast on my left leg, and even though Carlisle said that I would need to have at least one more surgery on my right knee, I didn't have a lot of pain. My left arm was another story. I had found out that there were two pins in my arm, one in my elbow and another holding my wrist together. My ribs and collarbone were almost healed, and that meant it was so much easier to move my shoulders. I was finally able to put my arms around Tanya.

We had been staying in a house that belonged to Carlisle, but two days after my surgery, we moved to a safer location. It was a house that belonged to Tanya's sister, Kate. It was well hidden and had been deliberately kept a secret from Alexei. It was far from any main roads and protected from prying eyes by a large mass of trees.

We had wanted to leave Russia entirely, but we felt that at this time it was best to lay low. Tanya was sure that Alexei had his followers searching for us everywhere. They would most assuredly be watching the roads and the airports. So for now, the five of us, Edward, Bella, Tanya, Carlisle, and myself, were going stir crazy in Kate's house, waiting to see what our next move should be.

I was sure that Sterling Hathaway was furious with me. Edward had been gracious enough to call him for me. Using an untraced cell phone, he posed as a hospital employee and let Hathaway know that I had been in a serious car accident. At that time, Hathaway had only been slightly understanding. Now, it had been four weeks, and he hadn't heard from me at all. By now, I was sure he had someone else doing my job, and taking my promotion. I would have called and talked to him myself, but it was too risky. There was a chance that Alexei had people watching Hathaway to see if I was really dead, and if they were listening, there was a chance they would track any correspondence back to me. I had no one to blame but myself for all of this mess.

The ones I was really worried about, were my parents. I couldn't contact them at all. The last they had heard was that I was in a car accident, and now I had just been missing for a month. I wondered if they had been checking the hospitals in Moscow, trying to find me. I had not let them in my life for a long time, but now that I was in so much danger, I was surprised that I really wanted to talk to my parents. It was ironic to find out that I needed them as soon as I couldn't talk to them anymore. It was also keeping me up at nights to think that there might be a murderous vampire watching them to see if I was really dead.

Despite it all, the last weeks with Tanya had been . . .well, fantastic. We had talked more, argued more, and made up more than I thought two people were capable of doing in such a short time. She and I had been together constantly, and I knew that if I were to be separated from her now, I would never survive it. In her eyes, I hoped I was seeing the same thing. She was not giving in on the whole mortality issue. I had been reminding her that my 27th birthday was coming up, and that if she needed an idea for the perfect gift, I knew just what she could get me. She failed to see the humor in that.

There was however, this ever-present danger swirling around us. It was like the elephant in the room. The subject was always looming at the front of our minds. It was weighing on us.

Part of Edward and Carlisle's worry came from the fact that there were only four vampires in the house, and they had no idea how many they might eventually have to fight. Apparently, the worry was shared by the rest of Edward's family. Since Alexei had never met any of Edward's family, they decided it was safe to travel to Moscow, as long as they didn't travel together. Five vampires might attract attention, but one or two would not. There was some concern that at the ball Alexei had seen Rosalie and Emmett and would connect them with Tanya, but she highly doubted that was possible. Tanya was sure that Alexei was much too focused on her to have paid attention to such a detail. Tanya missed her sisters terribly, but she knew it was much too risky for them to attempt it. Alexei or any of his followers would recognize them immediately.

The first to arrive were Alice and Jasper, they had been with us for almost a week, before Emmett and Rosalie arrived. When Rosalie walked in, she was carrying three large suitcases and two smaller bags. I smiled to myself as I saw her personality in many of the supermodels I had dated. It made me love Tanya all the more.

The last to arrive was Esme. I had been anxious to meet her, but after seeing how energized Carlisle became as her time approached, I was even more intrigued.

He had gone out on the grounds and gathered flowers and had filled their room with them, and all that day he had been playing Esme's favorite opera arias. The music flowed through the house and had been like an extension of Carlisle's longing to see the woman with whom he would spend forever. As I watched him, I wanted nothing more than to have his life. To love just one woman for eternity. To have what was most important to me by my side.

He had been at the window, anxiously watching for her, and when he saw her car emerge through the trees, he went out to meet her. When they walked back in, he was holding her suitcases, and after greeting everyone, they quietly slipped away. I knew we wouldn't see them until morning. I watched them go, all the others seemed oblivious to their leaving, but I stared after them with deep envy and yearning. This was what I wanted. I wanted Tanya as my wife with her belonging only to me. I wanted to have all of her, and for her to have all of me. I wanted us existing for eachother.

It was strange being in a house full of vampires. If I didn't know any better, aside from the extreme beauty and pale skin, I would think they were completely ordinary. Only the occasional quick movement, or comment by Edward before the person had a chance to speak would have given the hint that there was anything peculiar. There was a tight bond between them. They were a true family. It was interesting to me that they were more a family than I was with my parents and brother. Though now, I could see that our lack of closeness had mostly been because of my choosing.

A few nights after the whole family had arrived, Edward, Rosalie and Tanya had made their way into the next room, and I decided to follow. Because I was so slow, the group was already in the middle of a conversation.

I heard Rosalie talking, and I could tell she was annoyed. "Please tell me that we are not going to have to endure another 'vampire loving a human' ordeal. Honestly Tanya, aren't there enough male vampires in the world to keep you happy?"

"Enough, Rosalie," Edward growled.

Rosalie laughed before she spoke. "My mistake, maybe there aren't enough males. Edward, Tanya even made a play for you. She practically threw herself at you, and you completely rejected her."

I felt my stomach begin to burn. A deep pang of jealousy boiled inside of me. I heard Tanya yell something, but then Edward must have told them to be quiet. I heard him speak in a hushed voice, probably telling them that I had heard the whole thing. I didn't wait around to hear more. I was already halfway across the room and heading down the hall. My leg ached to move this fast, but I wasn't really concerned about that.

The first room on the right was a library. As I closed the door, I heard a loud crashing sound in the room with Tanya and Rosalie. I made my way in and without turning on the light, I found a couch by the window and sat down wearily.

I should have known. Of course Tanya would have fallen in love with Edward. That seemed natural, normal, expected.

Had she really pursued him?

Ah, why did that hurt so much? I had almost forgotten what that burning hole of acid in my stomach felt like.

If only she would make me a vampire, and then perhaps I would look similar to Edward. I would be attractive to her, I reasoned. But then I realized the foolishness of my reasoning. If she couldn't love me enough as a human, turning into a vampire for her seemed like a pretty twisted way to win someone's affection. And it wouldn't be real, it wouldn't be lasting.

I sat with my head laying heavily on the back of the couch. I couldn't be enough for her. Was I trying too hard to hold on to her? Should I let her go so that she could find someone like Edward? Of course that was what would make her happy. Of course it would. I was no competition for him. Not. Even. Close.

I suddenly heard the door creak open. Tanya quietly slipped in.

"Hi," she smiled. I watched her perfection flow into the room. She certainly didn't look like she had just been in a fight with Rosalie.

"Hi," I replied.

She came over and kneeling down in front of me, put her hands on each side of my face. "I'm so sorry that you had to find out that way about Edward."

I put my hands over hers. I gripped on to her cold hard fingers. "I don't think that_ how_ I found out that you were in love with Edward, is really what's concerning me."

She bit her lower lip as her brow furrowed. "It wasn't love. I thought it was at the time, but you do realize that I no longer feel that way about him, right?"

"Do I know that?" I asked bleakly.

The air escaped out of her lungs as she shook her head decisively. "That was 60 years ago, Michael."

Sometimes it was hard for me to fathom the life she had before she met me. She threw around the date of 60 years ago like it was last week. I ran my fingers over her hands as I said, "If I fell in love with you 60 years ago, all the time that's passed wouldn't have changed anything."

She touched her forehead to mine and breathed out, "That is exactly what I'm saying. With Edward, it was different. It wasn't like what I feel for you. It was nothing like this. Rosalie was just being her cruel, vindictive little self." Her cold lips ran over mine and I shivered with yearning for her.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

I moved my hands to her face. I brought her mouth to mine and kissed her hard. I curled my hands in her hair and breathlessly tried to make her forget him. I wanted to kiss her like no one ever did, like no one but me ever would again. I wanted my kisses to claim her. She answered my longings with kisses of her own, and I whispered her name and told her I loved her. I didn't know how to keep her. I desperately wanted to keep her.

She pulled away and stared at me. Her eyes looked alive and a bit crazed. Her usual warm butterscotch color was replaced by a darker, almost ocher shade that made the hair stand up on the back of my neck. She was trying to pull away, but my weak hold kept her in place.

"I . . . ." her teeth were clenched. "I shouldn't kiss you like this, Michael." Her whole body was rigid. Her hands seemed locked in my hair.

My breath was coming hard and quick. "I'm sorry," I breathed. You warn me, and I understand the reason, but I. . . "

I slowly pushed her down to the floor and positioned myself on top of her. She didn't fight me. I closed my eyes and held her face in my hands, my forehead was touching hers.

"Thinking about you wanting Edward . . . it just . . . drives me crazy." I let my lips lightly brush hers. "I want you to want only me."

"I want you," she said breathlessly. "That has never been the problem."

Her eyes opened and she looked at me through black eyes. "What _I_ am is the problem."

I knew that she had been with other human men. She had been honest with me about that. To say that it didn't kill me to hear that, would be lying, but for some reason, hearing that she had been attracted to Edward, did something to me.

Tanya and I had not been intimate. With me having casts on both of my arms and legs, it was not anywhere close to how I wanted our first time to be. And Tanya had noticed something too, whenever we became physical, she found it hard to control herself. She said it was sure to have something to do with how I smelled to her, but she said it had more to do with how she felt about me. She hadn't loved any of those men. Her feelings for me made it very hard for her to control her thirst. I knew all this, I had been very careful. But finding out about Edward, changed it all.

I put my hands into her hair, I kissed her and whispered, "We're not back to this. You keep feeling the need to remind me of what you are . . . . ."

My voice was strained and I found it hard to swallow.

"I know what you are, Tanya."

I kissed her so hard that my head was swimming.

"Michael," she whispered.

"Yes," I managed to say.

"I . . ." I began kissing her again. I had never kissed anyone the way I was kissing her now.

I heard her sigh and lock her arms around me. I was lost in her. I was drowning and I never wanted to come up for air. I pressed myself as close to her as I could. I was reaching for her buttons and cursing my casts for slowing me down. Then, she was holding my face and staring at me.

"Michael," she gasped. "I need your help. Please, please stop."

Her eyes were so dark, her face so terrified. Part of me whispered that if I pressed her on this, that maybe in three days I would be a vampire. But the fear in her eyes made me stop. There was something more here. It could mean my death.

I relaxed and rolled on my back next to her. I was still gripping tightly to her hand as I fought to control my breathing. I rolled on my side to look at her.

She was staring at the ceiling her eyes wide, her chest moving up and down rapidly. After several minutes she closed her eyes and her grip on my hand relaxed. I ran my fingers slowly across her cheek, and she turned to look at me. Her eyes were still black.

She didn't say anything, she stood up and held her hand out to me and helped me off the floor. My legs still felt weak, and I thought if I felt this way just from my human attraction to her, she must be going through something incredibly intense.

She walked me to our bedroom and once we were inside, she looked at me and said, "Get ready for bed. I need to talk to you."

When I lay down in the bed, she climbed in and moved into my arms. She still seemed to be trembling. I held her as tightly and firmly as my injured arms would allow.

"I need to go hunting tomorrow," she stated.

We had been together a month and she had never talked about going hunting.

"It has been careless of me to go this long," she said flatly.

"Okay," I said simply.

"Does it bother you to know that I will be drinking blood tomorrow?"

If it did bother me, I certainly wasn't going to let her know it.

I ran my fingers down her arm. "No, it doesn't."

"It doesn't repulse you?" She pursued.

I kissed the top pf her head. "Nothing repulses me where you are concerned." That was completely true.

"Michael, I will always have to do this, no matter how many centuries I exist, no matter how good I get at this, I will always be a slave to my thirst."

I swallowed hard and turned her chin up to me. "I get it, Tanya. Really, I get it." The look in her eyes made so afraid she was getting ready to say good-bye to me again.

She continued looking at me. "There is so much more about my world that you don't know**.** You're beginning to see our vicious side, but in truth, you're not even close to seeing how despairing and sinister this life can be."

"Carlisle's family doesn't look like they're in despair," I argued.

"At times, each of them has been. Besides, their family and mine are the great exceptions to the rule."

"You do know that the human world is far from perfect and wrought with hopelessness and despair, too, right?" I argued.

"That's different," she replied.

"The only difference is that if you send me back there, I will be breakable, subject to all matter of disease and old age. And I will be enduring all the wars, drugs, and general debauchery of society without you. I would be completely alone, mourning you until I died."

"Don't be so dramatic," she rolled her eyes.

"Actually, I thought I was pretty much spot on with what I said," I insisted.

We lay there silent, and once again, I felt the need to cut the tension between us.

"So did you win?" I asked.

She pulled back and looked at me in confusion.

"Did you win against Rosalie?" I clarified.

One eyebrow went up as she muttered, "I held my own."

"That, I believe," I chuckled.

My smile left me. I moved a piece of hair away from her face and ran the back of my hand across her cheek.

"Tanya," I swallowed hard. "Please don't leave me. Go hunting as long as you want tomorrow, but please come back."

Her eyes softened. "I can't stay away from you Michael. For right or wrong, I'll be back."

I would miss her like crazy. It would cause me actual physical pain to be separated from her.

She kissed me then. I held her tightly until sleep eventually overtook me.

I awoke to find her gone. There was a note on her pillow.

**"_You will be my constant thought until I am in your arms again, T."_**

**- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -**

When I came out of my room, I couldn't find anyone. I assumed they had all gone hunting, and had left me there alone. I sat down at one of the many computers in the house to find a way to occupy my mind. I had some things to work out.

It was clear that Tanya did not want me to become a vampire. Last night in the library proved to me, that one way or another this issue was getting pushed to the forefront.

Although it was very difficult for me, I was trying not to think about the physical side of the things. Of all the reasons for becoming a vampire, wanting to make love to Tanya could not be the deciding factor. It was a good enough reason for me, but ultimately, it had to be based on more. Tanya would never agree to that , I was wanted to show her I was thinking of our future in mature, and methodical terms.

The Mediterranean coastline was probably one of the sunniest places in the world, therefore, not a good place for Tanya. I was looking for places we could live after this whole mess was behind us. Perhaps she would want to live in Alaska with her sisters again. I spent the better part of an hour trying to find any sort of job in Alaska that would still make me a player in the financial world. It didn't look promising.

What if I became a vampire? I would definitely not be able to be in the financial world then. Would I miss this life of fast-moving money and deals? Maybe a little, but not enough. Besides, this job had never lived up to the excitement created when Bella and I worked together. It had all become extremely tiresome.

I had started to look at Washington and Oregon when Edward came up soundlessly behind me. I turned around and saw him and about jumped out of my skin.

"Geez, man! Could you at least make some noise on purpose?" I huffed.

He laughed. "Sorry. I'm not used to being able to sneak up on anyone." He came and sat in the lounge chair to the left of the desk I was using.

"Where's Bella?" I asked.

"Bella and everyone else went hunting with Tanya. They are sticking as close as possible to the house, but they felt there was strength in numbers if they went together."

"Do you think they are in danger?" I asked alarmingly.

Edward was shaking his head before I finished. "No, we don't think so. But, we discussed it during the night, and felt it was better to be as safe as possible."

It seemed like there were a lot of discussions that took place while I was sleeping. "So, you are my babysitter." I stated.

He chuckled. "That's one way of seeing it, I suppose."

It went silent, and I had a moment to study him. He looked restless and uneasy. I realized that he felt the same way I did.

"You missing, Bella?" I guessed.

His head went down as she grinned. "Yes. Is it that obvious?"

I smiled. "Maybe only to someone who is going crazy just like you. I keep checking my watch and it's like time is standing still."

He ran his hands through his hair and before I had a chance to try and block it, an image of Tanya in love with him flashed through my mind. He immediately shot me a sideways look, and I cleared my throat and looked away. I heard him let out a long sigh.

"Look, this thing with Tanya was half of a century ago. I am telling you the truth when I say that she isn't thinking about me at all, her thoughts are all centered around you."

Anyone else, and I would doubt what they said was true, but when Edward said it, well, I was very relieved.

I smiled at him. "She's thinking about me?"

He put up his hands as he said, "Oh no. Don't even ask me to divulge what's in Tanya's mind, I don't even do that for my brothers and sisters."

I'm sure he was aware of my disappointment. Besides, he was right, it wasn't fair. I leaned back in my chair and said, "Can I ask you a question?"

"Of course," he replied.

"You were in contact with Tanya after the whole ballroom thing in New York, weren't you?"

Without hesitation, he nodded his head. "Yes, I was."

"Why didn't you . . ."

He started talking before I finished. If I tried, I bet I wouldn't even have to open my mouth for this whole conversation.

"Because Tanya asked me not to. She was very upset about how she felt about you. Being extremely attracted to you, and your blood, was something of which I can keenly identify, and I completely understood her desire to get as far away from you as possible."

Fair enough. But I was still mad at Bella for lying to me about not knowing where Tanya was. Edward started talking before I even formed the question.

"In her defense, Bella wanted to tell you the truth. She could tell that you were in love with Tanya. She knew you had never felt like that about anyone before. She did her best to persuade Tanya to contact you. I could also tell by your thoughts that your feelings were genuine, but I insisted that she let Tanya take the lead on this. If Tanya felt she could control herself, then I knew she would find you. She had no faith in herself that she could do that, and as long as she felt that way, none of us wanted you in any danger."

He spoke so fast I had to concentrate to keep up. It was a few seconds after he finished that I finally got all he said.

"But you knew what it was like for Bella and yourself when you were apart," I argued.

He shook his head. "It still doesn't change the fact that Tanya didn't want you to find her. She is pretty stubborn. You may have found that out for yourself." I laughed and nodded my head as he finished.

"I was too weak when I first saw Bella. I tried to stay away, but I saw her everyday, and finally I gave in. I knew it was wrong, as Tanya does, but eventually, I just wanted her."

"But then you left again," I said sternly.

"I will spend the rest of my days trying to make up for that," he said softly.

"I would like to ask you a favor," I replied.

The corner of his mouth went up as he looked at me knowingly. "I don't have to do that, she has been watching Bella and I, and there has been extreme turmoil going on inside her. She sees Bella being happy with this life. She has also watched Carlisle and Esme. Carlisle turned Esme into a vampire for himself, and she sees Esme being happy. I am not going to try and persuade Tanya or anyone else for that matter to turn a human into a vampire. As a rule, it is wrong. But, once you fall in love, things become a bit more complicated."

"I understand," I said begrudgingly. "But if you could at least put in a good word, that would be helpful."

He just grinned and shook his head.

I glanced down at my watch again. When I looked up, Edward just laughed. "You want to go for a drive?" He asked.

I nodded gratefully. "Yes, thank you."

We made our way out to the spacious garage. Edward had his beautiful Audi parked three cars down. He jingled the keys out in front of me and I stared at them with extreme desire. "Oh man, I would love to. After I get out of these casts, I will definitely take you up on that."

I could almost feel the power underneath my feet as I drove, and I thought wistfully about my beautiful Jaguar that was now becoming rusting metal somewhere.

"Another time then," he said.

We both stepped down into the car. It purred to life, and then we were off. I had not left the house, since my unconscious arrival, and it was interesting to see my surroundings. The forest was dense and lush with trees towering above us. The curving mountain road was no match for Edward. I buckled my seat belt and did my best not to imagine myself back in a hospital bed if he sent the Audi off a cliff.

He put me in charge of the stereo and I picked out a CD I loved and had not heard in a long time. The sound system in the car was incredible. It blasted into my ringing ears, as we sped down the mountain pass. The road eventually straightened, and he accelerated. I dared not look at the speedometer.

We had been gone about an hour, and had just started making our way back. All of the sudden, Edward turned off the stereo and reached for his cell phone. He picked it up and said, "What is it, Alice."

I heard the air come out of him as he swore and then snarled into the phone, "How long ago."

Thirty seconds passed as he listened and took the corners even faster than before. He hung up and stared out at the night fiercely. I wondered how I had never seen how dangerous Edward was. He was like a different creature than he was just one minute before. His teeth were clenched, and his now dark eyes glared and flickered as he gripped the steering wheel and pushed the pedal down into the floor.

"What's wrong?" I was almost afraid to know what could make him like this.

"The Volturi has taken Tanya and Bella."

"What?" I cried.

"Alice has been watching Stefan's coven, to see what they have planned for retaliation. A few days ago Alice saw that a member of Stefan's coven had gone to the Volturi to inform them that Tanya killed a fellow vampire to save a human. Alice saw members of the Guard coming to Moscow. At the time, she felt their intention was to visit those close to Stefan and Nikolai. She thought it was only to pay their respects for they did to Nikolai." Edward sighed heavily. "But apparently, she was deceived**."**

"Why did they take Tanya and Bella?"

They were waiting for the opportune moment to take Tanya. Apparently the Guard has been watching. Alice sees them taking Tanya before a tribunal to be judged for breaking two very serious rules."

"Two rules?" I breathed.

"The first is, for killing Stefan, to save you. The second," he sighed, "They must have determined that you are still alive, and still human. They will not stand for that. It seems that they have been waiting patiently for the opportune moment to make their move."

"What will they do to her, Edward?" My chest felt tight and nausea was creeping in.

"Right now, Alice doesn't know."

"She doesn't know?" I gasped.

"So it would appear," he muttered.

"What will Alexei do when he finds out about Tanya?" I asked in alarm.

Edward swore and said something about killing Alexei if he got close to Bella.

"But weren't these the same people that killed Nikolai?" I argued. "Why would Nikolai's coven be helping The Volturi?"

"It was Nikolai's choice . . . besides," his eyes darted sideways at me. "They will always side with their own when a human is involved."

"The Volturi." I breathed. "Are they still the same group of men that killed Tanya's mother?"

He looked at me through narrowed, demonic eyes, "The very ones." he growled.

"So, they are justified in killing a vampire for breaking the rules?"

He swallowed hard. "Extremely justified."

My throat was tight with fear.

His face changed from anger to desperation and he almost hissed as he spoke. "If they harm Bella in any way . . . . "

He didn't need to finish. There was no way I was going to lose Tanya now. I knew I would end dying for it, but I would somehow take them down with me. I would expose them. I would hurt them somehow. I stared out at the now dark night.

"Edward," I begged.

"Yes," he said flatly.

"Go faster."

The road before me was nothing but a blur.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

**So, tomorrow is a doozy! You just wait . . . . . . . . . . . . Much more of the whole Cullen clan tomorrow. Love you all! What do you think? **


	30. ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD

**Hey! Is anyone still out there? I can't even tell you how sorry I am. I am sure that all of you have been just fine without the last two installments of my story, but I have been going totally crazy!**

**I need to say sorry for the weird message I left Sunday night too. The lightning hit our whole apartment building, and so nobody had internet that worked. They kept saying that it would be fixed that night, so I wasn't stressing too badly, but then, they told us it wouldn't be fixed until Tuesday, and I was like, *!# *#!&*#! You get the message, right? Then, the power went out. So I called up a friend that lives about ten minutes away, and found out she still had power.**

**I sit down in front of her computer, and I am freaking out again. This computer would make Bella's computer look like the top of the line. I swear it almost had a wooden keyboard. So, I fire it up and the keys are skipping and I am thinking how humorous this has all become. I was wishing that someone was trying to punk me, because that was how it seemed.**

**I got my computer working yesterday, but I still did not have internet access. I could have copied my story and posted it from somewhere else, but I wouldn't have been able to track your reviews and read what everyone had to say, and for me, that is the whole reason I am doing this. So again, sorry. Here is the second to last chapter. This will be my longest chapter in L2. Tomorrow, is the final chapter and epilogue.**

**I JUST READ ALL OF YOUR REVEIWS AND MESSAGES ABOUT THE LAST CHAPTER AND LIGHTNING STRIKING AS SOON AS TANYA WAS TAKEN, AND YOU ARE ALL BEYOND AMAZING AND UNDERSTANDING!**

I wanted to refresh your memory . . . . . .

*The Volturi and Alexei think that Simmons is dead.

*Alexei is in hiding because the Volturi want him gone for everything having to do with Simmons creating publicity about Nikolai

*Simmons and Tanya are quite in love

*Tanya needs to go hunt because she almost lost control

*Edward and Simmons are out for a drive

*Alice calls and says that the Volturi have taken Bella and Tanya . . . . . .

- - - - -

**CHAPTER 30 - ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD**

- - - - - -

Edward burst into the house. "Alice, how could you not see this coming!"

Alice was standing in the entryway with Jasper beside her, looking at Edward with apologetic eyes.

"I wasn't watching for anything like this," she explained. "The Volturi appeared to be coming here with the purest of intentions."

"How could you not see the Volturi planning to take Bella and Tanya!" Edward roared.

Alice was small, but she did not back down from Edward's tirade one little inch. I had never seen Edward act like anything but the perfect gentleman. Not even in the conference room when Bella was taking his company from him did I see a hint of this behavior. It was shocking.

"I saw the Volturi coming to Russia," Alice explained. "But all I saw was a vision of them showing their sympathy because of what they did to Nikolai. It seemed that Marcus and Nikolai's father were close at some point in the past, and Marcus wanted to explain himself."

"The next thing I knew, Felix and Demetri were ambushing Bella and Tanya in the forest. There was no other warning."

Edward stormed past Alice and she turned and followed him.

"Edward, while you were gone, I've been concentrating very hard on the Volutri's intentions. I think we may be looking at this wrong. I believe the Volturi have been waiting patiently for a chance such as this for a very long time."

Edward whirled around with his eyes wide. "What do you mean?" He demanded.

"Think of it Edward, I have never seen the Volturi step in and interfere like this before. I think they had an ulterior motive for taking Tanya. How many thousands of times have vampires killed each other? Unless it turns into turf wars like with Jasper, they don't care to get involved in such trivial matters. Did the Volturi care when you killed James to protect Bella?"

Edward's eyes narrowed. I was wondering what in the hell they were talking about. Edward killed a vampire for Bella? So, Tanya killing Stefan to save me was like, a normal thing for these people?

Alice stepped closer. "Tanya told us all about the feud between the Volturi and Alexei. We know that the Volturi have wanted Alexei gone for a very long time. The problem is that Alexei has many young strong followers, and they would stand and fight if the Volturi were to strike at Alexei without justification."

Edward's whole family had moved into the room, and were listening intently.

"Now, the Volturi finally have their motive to demand that Alexei step down."

"What is the motive?" I demanded.

Alice looked at me and then at Edward. He nodded his head and Alice began to speak.

"When Nikolai killed Olivia, there was a small amount of publicity. Then, when Zachary Conner went missing, public awareness increased even more. Of course, when the posters of Nikolai went up all over Moscow, we all know the reaction the public and the vampire world had over that. Now, that Michael's face is all over the news we have . . . . "

"What?" I interrupted. "What do you mean my face is all over the news?"

Edward turned to me. "Last night, a story about your disappearance appeared on a Moscow news channel. The reporter explained how mysterious it was that there was one confirmed death and two people missing that were all connected to Nikolai."

Alice continued. "The police have intensified their investigation to find Nikolai, and the reporter said there were rumors that you once gave a report to the police that vampires were involved in Olivia's death."

"Oh no," I murmured. It made more sense that Edward had been so eager to take me on a drive this morning. He didn't want me to turn on the television.

Alice sighed. "The Volturi are outraged. They are demanding that Alexei step down immediately. He has been in hiding ever since your stunt," Alice pointed at me, "but now, he will most definitely come out of hiding."

"Oh, I see," said Edward.

"What, what do we see?" I demanded.

Edward looked at me. "Alexei will come to Tanya's rescue. As soon as he finds out that the Volturi have taken Tanya, he will be furious, and he will make a stand against them."

This didn't make any sense to me. "Edward," I asked, "Alexei seems so selfish, why would he care so much about Tanya that he would risk his life to rescue her?" I asked.

All in the room exchanged knowing looks with each other.

"What?" I demanded.

Edward turned and looked at me. "In his own twisted way, Alexei has been in love with Tanya for centuries. He has wanted her to rule with him and be his wife."

I was frozen.

Alice turned to me. "I am sure the Volturi knew about this, and they have found the perfect opportunity to use the information. The Volturi are using Tanya as a pawn to draw Alexei out. Alexei will most assuredly come to save Tanya."

I stood looking at them all. I was dumbfounded.

"Were any of you _ever_ planning on telling me about this?" I shouted.

"What do we do?" Jasper asked quietly.

"My concern," said Esme, "Is how far the Volturi will go to incite Alexei. Would they cause harm to Tanya to push Alexei to his limits?"

"What will Bella and Tanya do if they are backed into a corner?" Edward breathed.

Jasper turned to Edward. "At least we know the Volturi are not planning to hurt Bella. I am guessing that Bella was the first to come to Tanya's rescue, and they were both taken."

Carlisle stepped forward. "I should go alone. I will talk to Aro, Marcus, and Caius myself."

"No!" Esme took his arm, gripping tightly. "You will not go there alone."

Emmett spoke up next. "I say we kill everyone we meet until we get to the ones holding Bella and Tanya."

Rosalie looked at him and rolled her eyes. It wasn't a bad plan, in theory.

All of the sudden, Alice began staring off into space. Her eyes seemed to be focused on something far away. She grabbed Jasper for support, and then whispered, "I need pen and paper."

In a blink, Esme was by her side holding what she needed. She quickly began sketching something that she was apparently seeing in her mind. It was fascinating to watch. At times, she didn't even look down, but just let her hand flit around the paper adding whatever her mind saw.

We were all gathered tightly around her, struggling to find anything recognizable about what we were seeing. Then, all of the sudden, the picture began taking shape. I knew exactly what she was drawing. I was so surprised that I jumped back a step. All eyes, but Alice's were on me.

I moved in and pointed down at the paper, "I've been in that room!" I exclaimed. "I was there a few months ago for a party. I was bored, looking for a way to leave without anyone seeing me, and I took a wrong turn, sending me into this room." I pointed up to the side of the paper. "There were engravings on the wall, over here. . ."

As if on cue, Alice began filling in the details I remembered. I pointed to an exit at the right end of the room, and Alice added it as well. Everyone stared at me again.

"They're still in Russia," Edward gasped.

"They haven't had time to get out of the country yet," Carlisle breathed.

Alice suddenly came back to us. She looked up into our eager faces. "Bella and Tanya are doing everything they can to help me. Up until now, they were blindfolded, and left alone. As soon as they see or hear anything, they are sending it to me. . ." She began trailing off again, and then she breathed in sharply. "A plane has left Italy, and will be landing in Moscow in two hours." She let out a gust of air. "They will send a helicopter to the rooftop, and Jane will be on it. They will take them to the airport, then fly straight back to Volterra."

Everyone began moving then. In about ten seconds, they were back in the room with cell phones and car keys. Edward was right in my face. "Can you tell us the address of the building?"

I blew out air in frustration, "I was taken there by a driver and was on the phone for most of the way. The name of the building was an unfamiliar Russian name. I can guide you there, but I can't tell you the exact location right now."

Rosalie huffed, "We have to bring him _with_ us?"

Edward gave a short nod, "Apparently."

"Hey! I was going no matter what!" I said forcefully.

No one listened to me.

"We are going to need some sort of initial distraction," Carlisle said quickly. "I can only assume the building will be heavily guarded."

I had an idea. "How about having Rosalie walk up to the building in that dress she wore to the ball in New York last year . . . ."

Everyone stopped what they were doing and were staring at me silently.

I swallowed embarrassingly. "Or . . . uh, you know . . .whatever . . . ."

Emmett looked at me menacingly. Rosalie raised an eyebrow at me.

Jasper nodded his head, "Not a bad idea," he said appreciatively.

"Aro and the others have never met Rosalie, they would not recognize her." Carlisle added.

"It will work," Alice said in a sure voice.

Rosalie turned her back in a huff as she headed up the stairs. "I'll find something to wear, and I'll get ready on the way," she said harshly.

At that comment, everyone began running out the door. Emmett stopped at my side and said, "Dude, when this is over, you and I are having a little talk."

I opened my mouth to speak, but only air came out. Luckily, at that moment, Edward scooped me up and said, "You'll be riding with me." The next thing I knew, I was sitting in the front seat of his Audi, pealing out of the driveway.

He was on the phone with Carlisle most of the way out of the canyon, while they devised a strategy that would get us to Bella and Tanya with the least amount of risk. As we came close enough to see the city lights, I had my first twinge of fear at what we were actually attempting to do.

The fear was not for me. It was all for Tanya. Vampires, at least from my experience, were a volatile lot that thrived on protecting their own. Each side would fight to the death. Of that I was sure.

Edward hung up the phone with a loud, frustrated sigh, and I asked him if he had any news.

He let out what seemed a large stream of profanity too fast to be intelligible, and said, "Alice keeps seeing Bella, and if she stays on her current course, she could very well end up in a battle with just herself fighting Felix and Demetri."

"Should I be worried about Bella, or worried about Felix and Demetri?" I asked anxiously.

Edward looked at me from the corner of his eye. "Fair question," he growled. "I fear for anyone who gets in Bella's sites when she is really angry, but Felix and Demetri are the principal guards of the Volturi. They have been guarding them for thousands of years, and they have yet to be defeated. She has to know we're coming for her, but she can be the most impatient . . . Bella's anger could get her . . . ."

He trailed off, and I felt the tension rise. I personally didn't think anyone could get the best of Bella. She seemed unbeatable in everything she attempted. She did have one weakness though, one thing that could cloud her judgment. Her anger. In the boardroom she had always managed to channel her rage into victory, but when it was added to her impatient nature, I was able to understand Edward's fears. I couldn't imagine what Edward would do if anything were to happen to her.

Edward and I were in the lead as we came into the city. I gave him instructions for the exit that would take us to the Pushkin Centre, where the building was located. I then told him in as much detail as I could the fastest route to the room Alice saw in her vision.

He didn't slow down as we raced through the city, and I was so scared for Tanya, I found it hard to sit still in my seat. Edward called Carlisle one more time to make sure everything was set, and then he began to tell me in meticulous detail everything I needed to know about the plan.

We would be parked three blocks down and come by way of the rooftops. Using her "gifts", Rosalie would distract as many guards as possible, creating a distraction that would get the others into the building undetected. Edward would be busy gleaning information from every mind he could, anything that would tell him the layout of the building, and where Bella and Tanya were.

Edward and Carlisle had surmised, that their presence in the building wouldn't go unnoticed for long. This could pose a potential problem for Rosalie. There was a chance that the guards may begin to attack her if they believed that she had something to do with what was happening inside. Emmett would be keeping a close eye on her.

My job was simple. Stay on the roof and be as silent and motionless as possible while they rescued Bella and Tanya. I would have no part in the rescue. I was trying not to be offended by that.

We passed Novy Arbat Street and things began to look familiar. I knew we were very close.

"We're almost there," I said nervously. "Two blocks to the right, and then up a half a block on the left."

Edward called Emmett. They immediately pulled over, and Emmett got out, leaving Rosalie to drive the rest of the way alone. Emmett jumped in our back seat and we circled around to the left and drove into a deserted parking garage. Carlisle followed about a mile behind us, so that we wouldn't attract too much attention.

Within seconds, we were out of the car. Edward had me on his back and we were waiting on the roof of the garage for the others.

As soon as Edward had Carlisle in his sights, he looked back at me and said sternly. "Complete silence." He then launched himself onto the next rooftop. Every instinct made me want to yell out. I was in absolute terror as we cleared rooftop after rooftop at dizzying speed. Every time we were airborne, I would see blackness underneath us and small streetlights streaking by. He would land with feather light accuracy after each leap, and then we would be off again. There was never a hint of exertion from Edward. Not a grunt or even heavy breathing. If I hadn't been so frightened, it would have been the most exhilarating experience of my life.

We landed on the roof of the Vneshtorbank, the building across the street from where Bella and Tanya were, and Edward came to a graceful stop as he let me off his back. I fell to my knees, and shook my head to bring back my equilibrium. My body was trembling as I fought off the nausea, and I forced myself to recover. There was no way I was going to get sick on this rooftop.

The others arrived shortly after we did, and then I watched with envy as they silently took their positions. Their eyes were completely focused. In them, I saw none of the kindness or the refinement I had come to know. They were hunters. They were killers. Each of them was crouched, ready to spring, and I backed away in admiration and awe.

It was true, I had no place here. They exceeded me in every way. They would save Tanya and Bella tonight, not me. I picked a spot, near the roof's edge, where I wouldn't be in their way, and sat down. I was noisy and clumsy in comparison to their stealth.

I watched Edward closely. I was looking for any sign that something was wrong. But for the moment, all I saw was supreme concentration. His eyes flickered and danced as he perused the minds of all in the building. At times, his eyes would narrow and his lip would twitch, and I knew that his mind was calculating things at an amazing rate.

It was so silent on the building that I heard Rosalie's car pull up and her door shut. I watched the muscles in Emmett's legs tighten. His fingers flexed with anxiety and it was clear he was ready to launch himself down the 15 floors to the ground if he felt Rosalie was in danger.

I ever so slowly raised my head to look over the edge. It was too high for me to pick out anything specific. It looked like there were four individuals standing closely together, but I couldn't hear anything, or determine what was happening. It was frustrating. I watched as Emmett smiled wryly, and Jasper jolted in response to something happening on the ground, and then I saw two more individuals come walking around from the left side of the building. They were all gathered around Rosalie, and I felt a sense of satisfaction that my plan seemed to be working.

"The plane will be here in 40 minutes," Alice said in a tense voice.

I heard Rosalie's laugh ascend up to us, and I knew from experience that the guards were captivated by her.

This seemed like the best time to attack. I whispered to Alice, "Why aren't you going in, Rosalie has five guards with her."

There was silence for about 30 seconds, and then Edward raised one hand up by his head. Everyone tensed. At that moment, I saw two objects drop from the roof and land softly about ten feet from the group. As they began walking, I realized they were more guards. Before I had time to process what I was seeing, Edward gave a quick nod and threw his arm down. Without a sound, all six vampires were no longer beside me. I watched with complete wonder as they landed on the rooftop of the building and immediately disappeared.

Now came the hardest part. Waiting. I hunched down in my position as I tried to work out the stiffness in my leg. I realized with humor that if a stray vampire decided to attack me, the only weapon I would have in defense was my leg brace.

For five minutes, I watched Rosalie continue to entertain the guards, and then there was a change. One guard launched himself up the side of the building to the third or fourth floor, and then began to climb rapidly, vaulting himself up each windowsill. Three more guards ran around to the back of the building, leaving the last three guards standing in front of Rosalie. For a moment, the three just stood there facing her, and then I saw one spring out of position and come at Rosalie. In a blindingly fast movement, I saw her slam the man down onto the cement and turn and kick the next one coming at her. The first guard was getting back up again as she sent both of her legs crashing into the third guard and then throwing the first guard on top of him. I could hear the impact of each blow, sounding like two large boulders being smashed into each other.

All three guards were up now and coming for her. I was almost hanging out over the roof, powerless to do anything to stop them. At the moment all three landed on her, I breathed out in relief as Emmett came crashing out of a third story window. He landed on two of the men and with a mixture of revulsion and gratification, I watched Emmett and Rosalie rip the three guards apart. I backed away when I heard the high-pitched screams and prayed that nothing like this was happening to Tanya or Bella. It seemed like it would be a miracle if everyone made it out of this alive. When I turned back, Emmett and Rosalie were gone, and I was alone.

I kept my head down as I searched every window looking for a sign that would let me know what was going on. I could see nothing. The rooftop was freezing. The wind was cutting right through me and in our rush to get here, I hadn't thought of trivial things like a jacket.

My teeth were clenched as I fought the chattering, and as I sat there in the early morning hour, the only thing that kept me sane was the mantra I kept repeating over and over to myself.

_Please let her be all right._

_Please bring her back to me._

_Please let me hold her again. _

_I will do anything, anything to have her. _

_Please don't take her away from me._

Then, as if in answer to my silent begging, I got a call on my cell phone. I jumped as it vibrated and my fingers fumbled anxiously to pull it out of my pocket. I recognized Jasper's number.

"Yeah," I whispered anxiously.

"I'm okay." It was Tanya. Her voice was intense, and she was in a rush.

My air escaped out of my chest as I heard her voice. I needed to feel her, to touch her. "Come to me, now." I commanded.

"Not yet, I am going to save Bella," she said quickly.

What was I supposed to say to that? I wanted her in my arms so badly that I ached, but how could I stop her from helping to save Bella?

"Oh, please, _please,_ Tanya come safely back to me," I begged.

"I love you," she said rapidly. And then she was gone.

Something felt different when she hung up. I felt a strange foreboding; as if something was about to happen that would change everything. My body became tense and the hair on the back of my neck stood up. I tried to tell myself that Tanya would be fine. I had just heard her voice. I just needed to calm down and wait this out. I hated the waiting. How I hated the waiting.

Then, I saw something move in the shadows. I looked around me anxiously. My throat tightened as I backed up against the edge of the roof. I had no escape.

Suddenly, he was there. He looked about twenty years old. His hair was very short and it was so light that it looked almost white. It made his red eyes stand out all the more.

In his soft smooth voice he spoke to me. "What is it about these Cullens and their fascination for humans?"

I was glued to my spot. I was frozen, unable to think of what my next move should be.

"There is one good thing about those freak vampires, they always seem to be carrying a snack." He found his comments very humorous and his eyebrow raised as he laughed softly.

I couldn't believe I was in this situation again. This time, there was no hope for me. I was even more helpless than when Stefan tried to kill me. My right leg was in a cast, my left leg was in a walking cast, and both of my arms were still in slings or bandages. Even if I could run, there was nowhere for me to go. I was trapped on this roof with no way to fight back.

When I made no attempt to speak, he showed mock concern and then his mouth turned into a sneer. His eyes narrowed and he lowered into a crouch. His fingers twitched as he anticipated the kill.

I jumped as the cell phone began vibrating in my hand. I had forgotten I was still holding it. It was Jasper's number again, which meant it was probably Tanya. There was no way that I was going to get her involved in this. She had saved me once, and Stefan's coven had almost killed her for it. I refused to put her in any more danger because of me.

The vampire's eyes flashed down to my phone, and then back up to my face. The phone stopped vibrating and immediately began again. If I didn't answer, she would know something was wrong. I was hoping that this vampire wasn't as sadistic as Stefan, and would just make it quick. One pounce and a snap of the neck was all it would take. But something told me that these blood drinking vampires had a flair for the dramatic. That centuries of boredom made them crave more than just blood. They also needed excitement.

Vampires also seemed to have a short fuse. I gambled on that and tried to speed things up by making him angry.

"Not tough enough to be in the real fight, so they sent you out here to battle with the crippled human?"

I figured that would make him mad. I was right.

He snarled as he straightened to full height and began walking towards me. He came within a few inches of my face and began circling me. Never taking his eyes off me. I felt his icy breath on my neck as he whispered, "I just like to be first to the dinner table."

I clenched my teeth and my hands balled into fists. Every instinct told me to run, to yell, but I was determined to make my last act a brave one. To look at him in defiance as he took my life from me.

In the distance, I heard a thumping. The helicopter was coming and all I could think about was that Tanya was still in that building. I turned as its bright lights shone down on the roof. It was hovering as I watched two figures, one hulking, and one as small as a child jump out of the helicopter and land gracefully on the rooftop. Like a blur, they were suddenly gone and in the building.

My eyes grew wide as I took a step towards the edge of the roof and gasped, "Tanya!"

Without a sound, the vampire was suddenly in front of me. His playfulness was gone. He grabbed me and slung me over the side of the building. We were fifteen stories high, and I quickly became disoriented. I was trying to tell which way was up as he quickly jumped from one windowsill to the next, slamming me into the hard brick wall every time he landed. My left arm smashed into the building at a bad angle and I screamed. He stopped on a large balcony and I fell to the floor as he dropped me and kicked me back into the shadows.

I was in excruciating pain. I righted myself as quickly as I could. I was backing up, using my right hand to push myself away from him. He was looking up, scanning the sky when suddenly he crouched and hissed as another vampire landed on the balcony facing him.

The first vampire bared his teeth and growled, "He's mine. I saw him first!"

The second vampire threw his head back and let out a growl that backed me up against the wall. "I have been waiting to taste this one for a long time**, **Joaquin**,"** he snarled.

I recognized the second vampire. It was Alexei. The terror level in me rose even higher. I couldn't believe that two vampires were fighting over me. I reached up and frantically tried the doors that led from the balcony and into the building, but they were locked. I fumbled in the dark looking for anything that could be used as a weapon, anything that I could use to escape.

I heard another growl on the balcony. I turned and gasped in fear. This time the fear wasn't for me. It was Tanya.

She was furious. She jumped on Alexei and spun him. He went crashing into the side of the railing, sending cement and metal splintering in all directions. Without pausing for a second, she kicked Joaquin and sent him flying over the edge of the balcony. She began to run to me, but before she could get close, Joaquin slung himself back over the railing and threw her to the ground.

"No!" I screamed.

Alexei was now up, angling himself so that he could see both Tanya and Joaquin and thwart off an attack from either side. Tanya's eyes flitted from one to the other as she yelled, "Edward!"

The seconds ticked frustratingly by while I waited for him to come down and save her. The three of them faced each other in a circle, maneuvering and flexing to the other's movements.

"Let's leave right now, Tanya," Alexei breathed. "I'll take you anywhere you want to go."

Tanya had positioned herself in front of me, and I sat there motionless, trying to attract as little attention as possible from the murderous vampires.

"It's over, Alexei. You no longer have a hold on me," Tanya snarled.

To my great relief, Edward finally landed on the balcony. His teeth were bared and his eyes were blazing and without waiting another second, he launched himself at Joaquin. Edward was a blur to me, but amazingly enough, Joaquin spun around and deflected Edward's attack. He came at Edward from behind and Edward turned himself around, grabbing Joaquin and sending him crashing through the locked door. Before I could flinch, Joaquin was coming at him again, gnashing his teeth and arching his back as he growled.

With the door smashed in, I now had my chance to escape. Tanya was so distracted with protecting me that she was putting herself in real danger of being overpowered by Alexei. I didn't want to leave her, I wanted to kill him myself, but I saw no other way.

Without turning my back on the battle, I painfully got to my feet and moved through the doorway. I realized quickly that my left arm was now completely useless. All the work Carlisle had put in to rebuilding it with pins and screws was wasted. As soon as I was in the darkness, I turned and began to run. My right leg was screaming with pain, as I ran through the room. I was about to open the door to the hall when I heard a scream outside. It was Tanya.

I panicked as I saw a third vampire attacking her, but her screams were not for herself, they were for me. Now that Alexei was free, he was coming for me. I looked past Alexei to Tanya. The hulking vampire had her in a death grip. Tanya's eyes met mine for a moment, and I thought how close we had come to having everything. I thought we had all the time in the world.

Alexei sprang at me, and then, as if she came out of thin air, Bella was suddenly standing in front of me. She crouched and snarled so loudly I had to cover my ears. Alexei never had time to slow down as he crashed into her. She grabbed him by the torso and slammed him into the ground. Before he could right himself, she took hold of him, and threw him out onto the balcony, where he fell over the edge and out of my sight. She turned to me and said, "Jasper will meet you on the roof. The others will be there soon." Then she ran to help Edward.

I quickly moved down the hallway. I was desperately looking for stairs or an elevator, anything that would take me to the roof. If I got to Jasper, I could tell him to come and help Tanya. Once the others came, I would send them too. I ran up and down the main hallway and found nothing.

I anxiously turned back around. There was another hallway that connected to this one, there had to be stairs there, I frantically reasoned.

I turned down the other hallway, and there I saw it. At the very end on the right, there was the door leading to the stairs. Ignoring the pain, I ran. My hand was reaching for the handle, when the all of the sudden, from behind me, a door came crashing into the hallway. Wood and sheetrock were flying everywhere. I put my hand up to my face to keep the dust away as I tried see through the debris. And then, I yelled in panic. Alexei was charging at me.

When he saw that I was alone, he smiled jubilantly. Before I could take a step, he grabbed me as he turned and ran back down the main hallway.

"Michael!" I heard Tanya scream.

I desperately tried to free myself from his iron grip. It was as if a statue held me prisoner, and there was no give or weakness in its hold. Suddenly he stopped, and I looked in front of us to see Tanya there, blocking his escape.

Alexei became murderously angry. Behind Tanya, was a large window that reached up to the ceiling. Alexei launched himself over Tanya and crashed through the window, while I did my best to shield myself from the glass that was making jagged little cuts all over my exposed skin.

Tanya turned and jumped out of the window behind us, where for a moment, Alexei and I seemed weightless, then to my horror, we began falling.

Tanya jumped onto Alexei's back, and he turned and snarled at her as he fought to get her off. She had a tight hold on his neck with one hand, while the other hand was reaching for the arm that had the iron grip on me.

Alexei growled once more as I heard him say, "Tanya, you will belong to me, and no one else!"

He snarled again, as he took hold of me with his free arm and hurled me out into the air.

Tanya turned to look at me. Her eyes were large and disbelieving. She used her feet to push off of Alexei, but he grabbed her and pulled her back. I didn't want to see the ground. I only wanted my eyes to see Tanya one more time.

"No!" She screamed.

And then I hit.

I felt everything crack and crumble inside me. I couldn't take in air. My eyes saw nothing but blackness and I knew I was almost gone.

Down a long tunnel I heard Tanya screaming my name. I tried to reach out, I tried to find her, but there was only pain and the struggle to breathe.

Then from somewhere, I felt cold hands on my face, and I could hear her voice. I used the last of my air.

"Do it," I gasped. "Now."

And that was all there was. I couldn't understand why I didn't see the bright light I'd heard about. There were no clouds, no tunnel, no music. All I had was a cold, lonely, quiet blackness.

And then, from far away came a warmth.

The warmth slowly spread through me, and I realized heaven must be near. I was at peace. I had done all I could to be with her. I would watch over her from above. I would take care of her.

Then everything changed. It began small, but quickly it spread to every corner of my body. There was nothing else. There was nowhere to run. I tried to escape, but my broken body would allow nothing. Every part of my mind was warped and throbbing.

Then I understood. I knew what this meant. I welcomed it. I savored it. I screamed, and I knew I must do my best to smother all signs of my pain. I did not want her to regret one second of this. I clenched my teeth and prepared to endure what was coming.

For all I knew was an inescapable, all-consuming fire.

- - - - - - - -

**YES!!!!!!!! LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK!!!! SEE YOU TOMORROW!!!!**


	31. MAGNIFICENT

**Well, here we are. I have to say how fantastic you have been. Very forgiving and sweet about my attempt to write about Michael Simmons. It has exceeded every one of my expectations. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Thanks to all who reviewed every chapter, and thank you to the ones who I have never heard from before, that just started to review. I would love to hear from each and every one of you that hung on the end on this story. **

**I was stuck and I couldn't come up with an ending. Then, I heard U2's Magnificent, and I was like, YEAH! It was totally what I was thinking. This song is sexy. It is perfect. See ya at the end, and don't forget there is an epilogue.**

**Chapter 31 - MAGNIFICENT**

**_-My first cry, it was a joyful noise.-_**

_- -_

I was born,

I was born to be with you,

In this space and time.

After that, and ever after,

I haven't had a clue.

Only to regret, this foolishness,

Can leave a heart black and blue.

-

Only love, only love can leave such a mark.

Only love, only love can leave such a scar.

-

I was born, I was born to sing for you.

I didn't have a choice.

But to lift you up,

To sing whatever song you wanted me to.

I give you back my voice.

-

Justified till we die.

You and I will magnify,

The magnificent.

Magnificent.

-

Only love, only love can leave such a mark.

Only love, only love unites our hearts.

-

Justified till we die.

You and I will magnify,

The magnificent.

Magnificent.

_-U2, Magnificent_

_- - -_

It was early morning. The sun had not yet risen over the Denali Mountain Range that could be seen from our bedroom window. She was obviously not asleep, but she had this odd habit every morning of lying in our bed with her eyes closed. She said it was like meditation.

I watched her.

There was nothing else. Nothing else would ever hold me like this. Only her. She had changed me, in every way that was possible. I lived for her now.

I was born to be with her.

She stirred, and I reached out and ran my hand over her cheek. She turned to me with her eyes open and reached out for me. I greedily pulled her to me.

"Hello husband," she smiled.

"Good morning, Mrs. Simmons." I kissed her forehead.

She snuggled far down close to me. "Is there anything I can do for you?" I murmured into her hair.

"There is something you can give me," she smiled down into my neck.

"What's that?"

Her mouth was at my ear. "How about forever."

I sighed in a pout and said, "That's not long enough. Isn't there anything longer you can ask me for?"

She brought her face up to look into my eyes. "If there was anything longer, I would ask you for it."

"And I would give it to you."

I kissed her then.

We had just built our own house not far from the main house where Tanya's sisters lived. We had been on our honeymoon for several months before we came to see her family. I could see how happy she was here, and we decided to stay. We had been back for a few months now, but her sisters were used to not seeing us for a day or two at a time. They were great about not intruding. It looked like today was to be another one of those days.

Around nightfall, we made our way outside. We saw two familiar cars parked in the main garage, Edward's car and Emmett's jeep. We smiled and ran over.

Bella was at the door before we had a chance to open it. "It's about time, Simmons. We've only been here since last night."

"Why didn't you let us know?" I asked.

Bella raised an eyebrow at me. "Edward warned us. You might as well have put a huge "Do Not Disturb" sign on your front door."

I looked over at Edward. He gave me the man salute. I gave him a big mental thank you and he nodded and smiled.

"We didn't think you were coming until Saturday," Tanya commented.

"We're here early," Emmett said, stating the obvious.

"Carlisle and Esme come with you?" I asked.

"They're in Europe, Carlisle has lectures in Oslo and Brussels," Jasper answered from the couch.

I didn't see Rosalie anywhere. I was sure she was here, but I wouldn't be searching her out. I squeezed Tanya's hand. She was probably thinking the same thing.

Tanya gave me a quick kiss and went to find Irina and Kate. I followed Bella over to where Edward sat on the couch. I hadn't seen her since she had been the best man at my wedding. After that, we had left rather quickly for our honeymoon.

She looked straight at me and asked, "How is everything?" I knew she didn't mean with Tanya. She was talking about my adjustment to this new life.

I took a deep breath. I had actually been amazed at how well I had taken to all of it. There was definitely a craving for the blood of humans, but Tanya had prepared me well. She had been the best and most patient of teachers.

"Everything is going much better than I expected," I said with a smile. "I haven't really been around people very often. Most of our honeymoon was spent on an island. I saw people twice, and I dealt with it."

"What about the airports," Bella asked tentatively.

I gave a slight laugh. "Tanya never let go of me the entire time. I was worried when we first walked into the crowded, hot airport in Chile, but I handled it quite well. Tanya just talked me through it. I think she was more nervous than I was."

I shook my head in wonder. "You know, it's strange. The craving is there, I can always feel it in the back of my mind, but it's not the strongest part of me." I stopped for a moment to find the right words.

"The strongest emotion I feel is for Tanya. My love for her far surpasses the craving for human blood. If I was changed into a vampire and I didn't have Tanya there with me, I am sure this would all be very different. But, loving Tanya like I do, it calms me; it keeps everything else in perspective. It keeps me in check."

Bella smiled. She took Edward's hand as she said, "You described it very well. I know just what you mean."

"What about your family?" Edward asked me.

That was a hard one. After Tanya changed me, I insisted that my family not think I was dead. At least not right then. I wanted to be able to talk to them one more time, give them a happier ending than me just disappearing in Russia. My parents were elated to hear from me after I had been missing for so long.

I had to admit, I had not been the best son. When I moved to New York, I didn't make any efforts to keep in touch. I had kept all of our conversations light and on the surface. I never talked about anything personal or important to me. I had been close to my parents once, and I let that slip away. I wanted to try and fix that before I "died". Now, it had been almost a year, and I still hadn't made any hard decisions where my family was concerned. Tanya said there was no rush, but at some point it would be unavoidable.

"Well," I paused. "I have talked to them more in the last six months than in the last five years combined." I sighed heavily. "It has been great, but I sometimes wonder if I have just made it harder, especially on my mother, for when I end up having to end it."

"Do they know you're married?" Bella asked.

I shook my head. "They know that I'm seeing someone. That's as close as I would let them get to the truth. They're pressing me to come and visit and they want to meet Tanya too." I laughed slightly. "I don't think there is any chance of us going to sunny Southern California."

Bella just looked at me sadly but Edward, I could tell, was deep in thought.

He took a deep breath and began. "Here is my advice for you, Michael. You didn't ask for it, and you certainly don't have to take it." He smiled at me before continuing. "Your parents would be happy to see you no matter what the circumstances. Make the visit on your terms, where you have more control over the surroundings. You could fly them to the Oregon Coastline for a weekend, for example. Your parents will notice a difference in you, but it has been five years since they have seen you. It would be a blessing to your parents, but it would also be a good thing for you and Tanya."

He leaned forward in his seat. "Your human memories are fading, they will continue to fade. Countless years are going to pass without you being able to see your parents. I wish I had your choice to make, to see my parents one more time. Make a memory of them in your new mind, and you will able to keep it."

I stared at Edward silently. I knew the story of how he made his way into this life, but I never took the time to think through how he felt about his first parents. He was right. I was only thinking about my fears. Tanya and I would talk about this and make plans to see my parents soon. Edward smiled at me.

He understood.

- - - -

Don't ask me how it happened, but somewhere during the night I ended up watching, "The Fast and The Furious" with Emmett in the theater room. He was hilarious. He knew the make of every car in the movie, and would yell it out every time a new car came on the screen. We were high-fiving each other and screaming at the cops to leave them alone. Rosalie came in once. She stayed for about five minutes and then rolled her eyes and left again.

When the movie ended, Emmett stood up and held his fist out to me. I bumped him as he said, "I better go find Rosalie, but hey bro, it's good to have you around. Especially with Tanya. Man, she is way happier now than she used to be. I count you as a brother." Then he left. I was very touched by what he said. I was beginning to see why Bella thought so much of him.

I looked at my watch. It was just about time for the morning stock reports to start. I couldn't break old habits. If I was around a Television at this time of the day, I just had to check and see how Wall Street was doing.

The biggest story this morning was talk of a merger between TeleMark and Goff Systems. That was nothing new. I had been involved in a lengthy conference call with Hathaway about that very subject before my "car accident". I knew these two companies weren't serious. They were just trying to drive down the price of their stock so that they could buy them back at a cheaper price. Oldest trick in the book.

I paid particular attention to the stocks I owned. For the time being, I was in limbo, but at some point I would be liquidating all my holdings. I would talk to Tanya about seeing my parents, and there was a chance I could put off the inevitable for a few years, but I needed to plan for the future. I had to start moving my mutual funds out of their long-term programs and into shorter, higher yielding portfolios.

I was happy with my new life. Beyond happy. But I also couldn't help being saddened over the idea that I would never be involved in this world of high finance again. Actually that wasn't entirely true. I was only sad that Bella and I together wouldn't be able to be in this life. She had been what made it truly enjoyable and exciting.

It certainly hadn't been the case with Mr. Hathaway.

He had been furious when I quit. When I had finally become coherent again after I was changed, I called him and told him that I was leaving. He was already in a state when I called, because I had been missing for a month. He ranted about how he had molded me, and taught me everything I knew, and if I thought I was going to just pack up and go to another company, he would see to it that I never worked in the financial world again. He would ruin me. He accused me of conspiring against him all along, and that he wouldn't be surprised if I was working with Bella behind his back.

My parents? I wanted to stay close to them as long as possible. As for Sterling Hathaway? I wouldn't have minded if he thought I was dead.

After catching up on the stocks, I turned to another financial report. This one dealt mostly with international business. Before my change, I had been working on a deal between the Moscow based Nyatabank and the Swedish company Bjorgstog and I was curious to see if any news of the merger had hit the airwaves yet. I was deep in thought when Bella came in and sat beside me.

"You still have a passion for all this, don't you?" She stated.

"Mm-hmm." I didn't turn my head from the screen as I answered her. The information was just too interesting for me to break away.

"Yuri Nostov has done a good job with the Moscow Branch I see," she said.

Once again, I just nodded my head and kept my attention at the screen.

She began to watch with me. For about five minutes she sat silently and then I heard her mutter under her breath.

"What a crock."

I glanced at her and she began speaking rapidly. "If LeMeterien thinks that Chancellor Gregorian is going to let them get away with breaking their company apart without any repercussions from the French stock exchange they are bigger idiots than I thought."

I turned towards her and began nodding my head emphatically.

"I agree completely!" I began gesturing with my hands. "I mean how stupid does Cardonay think we are that we would just believe that he plans to restructure. It is completely obvious that he plans to sell out and take the money and run."

Bella was shaking her head. "Idiots," she lamented.

"Idiots." I agreed.

We turned back to the TV and continued watching. We stayed there for over an hour discussing what we saw, disagreeing at times, but mostly we were consistent in our views**. **I was surprised with the way she defended her opinions with such passion and ferocity. I had no idea that she was even paying attention to the world of high finance anymore. She knew as much as I did about the major players, and was completely current on buyouts and mergers.

After the show ended, we were still sitting on the couch debating over whether Serbia should let their companies stay private or made public and what that would do to their overall strength as a country, when Edward came walking in.

He looked at us thoughtfully. It was always fairly easy to tell when Edward was deliberating something. He was an extremely methodical man. He was brilliant, in my summation, and I looked up to him in many ways. But now, he seemed troubled.

"Is anything wrong, Edward?" I asked. Bella looked up at his face to see for herself.

He shook his head slowly. "No, everything is fine. I just came to take my wife out hunting, would you and Tanya like to join us?"

I stood up enthusiastically. Tanya and I had been holed up in our house for three days straight. I could use a good hunt, I needed to gain back my strength and see if maybe we could try for four straight days the next time. Edward raised an eyebrow at me. Embarrassed, I turned around and walked out of the room. I would have to remember Edward's gift and keep my thoughts for Tanya in check. That was not going to be easy.

When we walked out of the house, the sun was just cresting over the giant mountain range. After a short discussion we decided to head North. Edward had a favorite hunting spot that he wanted to check, and we all agreed to follow him.

Aside from the night I saw Bella fighting right before I was changed, I had not really seen her behave like a vampire. I watched her running ahead of us with Edward, and I was amazed at how natural it seemed for her. It was like she was meant for this. When I first learned that Bella was a vampire, I wasn't really in the mood to hear her defend this life. But now, I could see what she meant when she said that this was her destiny. That is was before, when we worked at the firm that she hadn't really been living. She shined now. Bella and Edward were at their best when they were together. She and Edward were definitely "one". I hoped that Tanya and I were becoming as close as Bella and Edward were.

I looked to my right. Something in my senses stirred. I slowed down a little and when I turned back, I saw that Edward was staring in the same direction that I was, with his jaw clenched, and his face taut.

Far off in the distance, at least three miles away, I saw the herd. It was a large one. I smiled at Edward and he gave me a knowing look. Caribou was my favorite. By now, Bella and Tanya were turned as well. Without another word, we all began running.

I was never the type to show off, but I couldn't help myself. Before, I had let Edward take the lead, but now I was in for the hunt. I accelerated and was soon running by myself.

It was great to be a young vampire.

We closed in quickly. Almost too quickly. The herd truly never had a chance.

The leader turned and ran down a steep embankment and the rest of the caribou followed. I smiled and adjusted my course. I was now running parallel to the herd and I looked through them quickly, singling out the one I wanted. Gaining even more speed, I angled sharply and attacked. I bit, paralyzing my victim, as Tanya, Bella, Edward and the rest of the herd thundered past me. For the moment, I let my thirst take over. I drank greedily, and then raced on, demanding more.

It was mid-morning when we had finished burying the remains. We had followed the caribou for over an hour, satisfying our thirst. I turned to Tanya and saw that she had been watching me. I smiled at her, and she began walking towards me. Without saying a word, she kissed me. I clung to her as tightly as I could and heard her sigh as I knocked the breath out of her.

"Ow." she smiled.

I chuckled against her lips. "Sorry."

She kissed me again and I forgot we weren't alone.

"So, we thought we'd head back . . . . Simmons, did you hear me?"

I broke from the kiss just long enough to answer, "I heard you, Bella."

"Were we that annoying?" I heard Edward ask.

Bella laughed. "Worse, much worse."

Edward took Bella's hand and began walking. "I need to talk to Bella," Edward said. "We'll see you back at the house, okay?"

Tanya and I waved at them and turned back through the canyon. We walked part of the way, not feeling the need to hurry. My thoughts turned to the night I was changed. Everything had been so uncertain then. I wasn't sure what would happen between me and Tanya. I wasn't even sure that she would stay with me. Alexei wanted to kill me, and the Volturi were holding Tanya. It seemed that my world was dissolving. Like sand sifting through my fingers.

It was strange that I was secretly grateful to Alexei for forcing Tanya to change me. After he had hurled me ten floors down onto the asphalt, Tanya fought him off and came to me. Carlisle, Esme, and the others had seen everything from the roof, and before Alexei could get to Tanya, they attacked him and killed him. He did have some of his followers with him, but they all seemed relieved that this maniacal leader no longer had a hold on them. They fell back into the shadows and ran away into the night.

Aro and Marcus had come out to witness the burning of Alexei. When they were sure that Alexei was dead, they left peacefully. Alice had been right. All they ever wanted, was to have Alexei dead.

I held Tanya's hand tightly and kissed her fingers as the trees broke and our house came into view. There had been many dreams I had planned out for Tanya and me before I knew the truth. Every time I saw our house, it was like a symbol. It represented that I had just about everything a man could ever want. A future with the woman I loved.

We went back to our house to change. I was always quick with the shower. Tanya, as most women are, took a little longer. I was reading the New York Times online, when there was a knock on the door. It was Bella.

"Hey, what's up?" I asked cheerfully. I moved aside so that she could come in. It seemed that she was a little on edge.

She was fidgeting with her hands as she turned to face me. "I just wanted to come over and see your new place."

I looked at her suspiciously. "Okay," I said slowly. I waved my hand out and said, "Here it is."

She walked around, commenting and admiring. It was built a lot like a lodge with high timber frame beams and several large windows. She laughed at the large caribou that hung above the fireplace.

"Well," I defended, "If any humans come to visit, I can tell them that I love to go hunting and that caribou are my favorite, I will have that to back me up."

She turned and stared out one of the large windows. "Do you really think that any humans will ever visit you here?"

I laughed. I had to admit, we were pretty secluded. The only humans I had ever seen were flying over us.

"It could happen," I joked.

Bella didn't laugh. She continued to look out the window as she spoke softly. "It's a far cry from where we used to work on Wall Street, isn't it?"

I nodded my head as I ran my hand through my hair. "Yes, it is."

She was quiet for at least a full minute. I didn't feel like I should interrupt her train of thought with small talk. When she finally spoke, there was a little more volume to her voice.

"I really enjoyed watching the stock reports with you this morning. It was great discussing Kleinhoffen's merger. It had been on my mind and it was great to use you as a sounding board and hear your views."

I smiled.

"Anytime," I said.

"We sure made a good team," she commented.

"The best," I agreed.

She turned to face me now. She had a sly smile on her face. "I have been very encouraged with how well you have handled this change. I think the only person that's handled it better than you, is me."

"Is that so?" I challenged.

"Well, you've done great, but you haven't really been around enough people to test your strength," she observed.

"Why would I want to test my resolve?" I teased. "Why don't I just stay out here forever and not worry about ever seeing humans again?"

She tilted her head while she twisted her mouth, "That sounds like a lot of fun. Great life you have planned for yourself there, Simmons."

I was starting to wonder where she was going with all this. I looked at her suspiciously. "Is there a point to all this, Bella?"

She took a deep breath and furrowed her brow. "Well, if you must know, I have been thinking really hard about something, and I wanted to get your opinion on the matter."

I stepped forward. "What is it? What's been on your mind?" I didn't dare to hope.

Her mouth twitched a little. Her hands went to her hips and then she just blurted it out. "Over a year ago, you talked to me in my apartment about us going into business together. I never forgot about it, and I have seriously been thinking about your idea. Obviously a lot has happened since then, and we would both have to work extremely hard to prepare ourselves, but I believe we would be great . . . . what do you think?"

I tried to keep it together. If I acted too excited she might think that I wasn't capable of restraining myself, that I couldn't control my impulses. But, I couldn't help the big smile that spread across my face.

"Bella . . . .I . . . . yes. Are you kidding me? This is by far the . . . . . this is going to be great . . .WE are going to be great! Can you just imagine? Oh man . . . .we are going to take New York by storm! They aren't going to know what hit them! Yes!"

I think I got my message across.

Bella started to laugh. She came away from the window, and stood right in front of me. We both started talking at the same time about what we thought should happen, and where we should start. We were talking lightning fast when Tanya came into the room. I stared at her and realized I needed to discuss this with her. This wasn't just about me anymore.

I sat her down and started explaining everything to her. Bella would interject every once in a while, and soon the concerned look on Tanya's face turned into surprise. At the end of my speech, she stood up slowly and took my hands.

"You seem genuinely excited about this, Michael. Is this what you really want?"

I nodded sincerely. "Yes, but only if you want this, too. The way I see it," I turned to look at Bella, we hadn't discussed this part yet, but it seemed logical. "The way I see it, we have a good ten years of this, and then we will have to stop. Too many questions will be raised about why we haven't aged."

I kissed Tanya's hands as I finished. "Do you think you have it in you to live in New York City for that long? I don't want to do it if you can't be in this with me 100 percent."

She looked deeply into my eyes. One of her hands came up to my face. "I could never deny you anything. It sounds like a great adventure. I am with you 110 percent."

I picked her up and swung her around. She laughed, but when I brought her back down, she looked concerned. "Are you sure you're ready for this?" She asked.

"Will you help me get ready?" I asked her gently.

She kissed me then. "I love you," she whispered.

"I love you back," I said.

I turned and looked at Bella. "Is Edward really okay with this?" I asked.

She gave a smile and said, "I thought I was hiding my thoughts pretty well, but Edward can read me better than I think. This morning, when you and I were discussing the financials, Edward was listening. On the way back from hunting, he told me how much he loved hearing that excitement in my voice. So, he asked me again if I wanted to give this one more push. Do this for a few years, just like you said. I had to be honest with him and tell him that I wanted it very much. He is so wonderful to be so understanding."

Bella took a deep breath and punched me in the arm as she said, "So, I say, let's take it slow. There's no rush. Let's be methodical about this and when we're ready, we'll give them all a run for their money."

"After all," She added. "The competition has got to sleep sometime."

She raised her eyebrows and smiled a venomous smile that made my arms tingle. If Manhattan thought she was dangerous before, they were in for a serious surprise. We were going to be a fantastic team.

Bella turned for the door. "I'm sure Edward has been listening, but I'm going to go find him so that he can be part of the celebration too."

As we walked outside, I said, "So, do you have any ideas how we are going to pull this off? We will have to be the only ones in on our little "secret". We're going to need assistants and secretaries. Not to mention a legal team and such."

"I've been thinking about that too," Bella said. "I propose that we get Zach Conner to be our Vice President, he already knows all about us. What do you think?"

It was a great idea. "How are we going to find him?" I asked.

Bella looked at Tanya. Tanya looked up at me and smiled. "I know where he is, you can call him and see what he says. He may be a little reluctant at first, but he owes me big."

That was a story I couldn't wait to hear.

"Simmons," Bella said. "There is one more thing I would like to discuss."

"Sure," I said.

"I know this is the world of cut-throat deals and high-stakes finance, but I am no longer in this to bring men to their knees. I just want to be in this exciting business one more time, and find a way to beat the Hathaways of the world with cleverness and cunning, not cruelty and spitefulness. What do you think about that?"

"Bella," I replied. "I couldn't have said it better myself."

We walked into the main house and were met by Alice and Jasper.

"A thunderstorm is heading this way. It will be here around 6:00 this evening." Alice smiled angelically as she pleaded with her large eyes.

I looked at Tanya quizzically. I couldn't understand why Alice was so excited about a storm.

Edward came and took Bella's hand, and from the second floor I heard Emmett yell, "Hey Mike, if you can hit, you're on my team. You are screamin' fast right now."

"No way, Emmett. Totally not fair," Jasper was yelling up the stairs, arguing his case.

I looked back at Tanya, and she was rolling her eyes. "Baseball." She explained. "A thunderstorm is coming and we are going to play baseball."

"Sweet," I grinned.

- - - -

Later that night, after Emmett, Bella, Alice, Tanya, and I won the baseball game, I was sitting up in bed writing down as fast as I could all the thoughts that were in my head. There were financial reports scattered all around me, and I was compiling information that I felt Bella and I could start studying.

I could write much faster now. Facts and figures swam in my head without becoming muddled or lost, and I could compute at a much faster rate than before.

Bella and I were going to be lethal.

Tanya was lying down beside me. I looked over and saw that she was staring at me. Her look was concerned.

"Is something wrong?" I asked.

"There are a lot of beautiful women in New York," she said thoughtfully.

She said it as a statement, not a question. I just looked at her, not quite understanding. She continued.

"There are a lot of models and movie stars there, gorgeous women from all over the world."

I stared at her. I simply couldn't believe what I was hearing. Was it possible that she was worried about me finding someone else? Did she really think I could want anyone other than her?

My eyes grew wide. "Are you thinking that maybe I will be interested in the beautiful women in New York?" I asked incredulously.

She still had that same look on her face. "Emmett told me about the woman you brought to the Rainbow Room that night, and Jasper told me that you dated Giselle Bundchen." She rolled over on her back and one hand went to her forehead. "Giselle Bundchen, Michael. She is every man's dream."

I was a little speechless.

I pushed my papers to the side. I lay beside her and looked straight down into her eyes. She was magnificent.

"You are the only woman I have ever loved. You are the only woman I will ever love."

Her hand brushed over my cheek. She smiled a tiny smile, but didn't say anything.

"You know that, right?" I pressed. "I hope I show you everyday that you are my world."

"You do, Michael. You do. It's just that . . ."

I wouldn't let her finish. I took her hand and placed it over the silver scar on my neck.

After my change, my skin had been flawless. Except for a curious silver mark where Tanya had bit me. Where she had tasted my blood, and made me like her. It was the only thing that had remained.

"You feel this?" I asked.

She nodded her head.

"It means you own me. You have claimed me, and I am yours. I only sing for you. I was born to be with you." I kissed her then.

When my lips parted from hers, I spoke again. "Tanya, only love can leave a mark like this. Only true love."

She pulled me down to her again, and the papers fell to the floor, to be forgotten for a long, long time.

No matter what this existence would bring, I would face it with her. There weren't enough days in eternity to love her. I would selfishly take whatever was given to me, and still want more.

What does a man do when he gets everything his heart desires?

He grabs on with both hands and he never lets go. He fights to keep it, to make the most of it, and not waste a second. That was exactly what I intended to do.

For the rest of my days.

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**What did you think? Don't forget the epilogue!**


	32. EPILOGUEHEADLINE

**EPILOGUE - HEADLINE**

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I sat in my car, oblivious to the morning traffic. I didn't worry myself with such trivial things, that was my driver's job.

The car pulled up in front of the office and I huffed my way out of the back seat. I needed to start working out, I chided myself. Maybe if I cut back on the scotch I would lose a few pounds. If I could just pay someone to work out for me, that would be the perfect scenario.

I made my grand entrance onto the 42nd floor. It was 6 am, and my four secretaries were standing at attention waiting for me, just like they were paid to do.

"Good morning Mr. Hathaway," they all chimed in.

Secretary #1 handed me my schedule for the day, Secretary #2 handed me my messages. Secretary #3 followed me into my office and set my coffee on my desk with the New York Times and the Wall Street Journal lying beside it, and Secretary #4 sat down in her usual chair, poised and ready to take notes for the first of many memos that would be going out today.

Secretary #3 was still standing in front of my desk.

"What do you want," I growled.

"The Board is assembled and waiting in the main conference room for you, Mr. Hathaway."

I waved my hand dismissively. "Make them wait," I grumbled.

I always made a grand entrance. But not before I made them wait at least twenty minutes for me. It made me look even more important.

Secretary #3 turned and left the office as I perused my messages. I smiled in satisfaction at one message. Hans Grunderman had called to say that he was about to put the final nail in the coffin of a company that I couldn't wait to own. I was going to break it into a hundred different pieces with each going to the highest bidder. His meeting was scheduled for 8 am and he would be in to report the goings on around 9:00.

"Good man," I murmured.

Now there was a man after my own heart. He was ruthless, and heartless, and didn't let anything personal get in the way of the kill. Not like Bella Swan. I felt my blood pressure spike just thinking of her. No, Hans Grunderman never let anything get in his way. He would take down his own mother if she had anything he valued. Just like it should be.

Secretary #2 buzzed in to say that I was due for a lunch meeting with Lawrence Dawson of the law firm, Dawson, Grines & Nelson at 12:30. I sneered. Yeah, I 'd let him take me to lunch. I'd make it the most expensive restaurant in town. Why not? I was already taking him for all he was worth. Let him whimper and cry about why his client needed to keep his company, it wouldn't do him any good. It never did.

I was the great Sterling Hathaway.

I always won.

I never lost.

I stood up and turned to face the city. The large expanse of Lower Manhattan hustled and bustled below me. I looked down on my subjects and muttered arrogantly, "I own this town."

I breathed in deeply and looked out past the buildings and out over the horizon, to the Atlantic Ocean. Now, I was making deep strides internationally as well. A few more years and I would own the world.

I closed my eyes and breathed in deeper.

I looked back at my desk and saw a message from Viktor Nogorov, the new manager of the Moscow Branch. He was going to be in the city next week and he wanted to meet with me. I had just fired the man that had taken Michael Simmons' place. He had been there for the last two years, and he had done a fine job, but he wasn't gong in for the kill as hard as I'd hoped. It was so hard to find good help these days.

Michael Simmons. It had been two years since he had left, and the thought of him still made my blood boil. Michael Simmons was a wimp. He got in one little car accident and apparently fell apart. Couldn't handle it. I still couldn't believe that he had quit his job. No one quits a job like this! It's the best place in the world to work! I knew I was the best boss. He was just like Bella. I molded and shaped them, using all my knowledge to help them, and how do they thank me?

Ungrateful, that's what they were.

I sipped my coffee as I sat back down. Secretary #4 was still poised and waiting. Let her wait. She would sit here all day if I made her.

I picked up the New York Times and perused the front cover. Just the same old thing, I thought. Nothing new. What I really wanted to see was the financial section. That was where the real news was. "If it's worth reading, it's in the financials" that's what I always said.

At first, I thought I read it wrong.

Secretary #4 ran to my side. "Mr. Hathaway, are you all right?"

There was a strange wheezing sound. I realized it was coming from me. She yelled for help and secretaries and assistants came running in. I clutched the paper in both hands as I shook them off of me. I let out a large growl and stormed past them.

This couldn't happen.

I would stop them. Somehow I would stop them.

That lying Simmons. Just as I suspected.

He had been planning to join Swan all along.

My cell phone began ringing in my pocket. I knew what it was about.

I scanned the article as I walked, and read their new office was a few blocks away, by Upper New York Bay. It was reported that they were excited to be back.

This was mutinous.

TRAITORS!

I was almost to the boardroom. I pushed through the door and stood there, breathing heavily.

I silently began going through the list of my clients that I knew would jump ship and join them the second they got the news.

_We're ruined_! I wanted to yell. _We're finished_.

No matter how true it might be, I could never say it. I would never say it.

I would never let the board see my fear.

I stood in front of the Board as I shakily raised the newspaper up to eye level.

"We're in for a war, gentlemen." That's all I could say.

For the headline read,

**"SWAN AND SIMMONS PARTNERS, AND BACK IN BUSINESS."**

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**Thank you from the bottom of my Edward lovin' heart. You are the best twlight friends ever. Special thanks to Aspiring Empath, and TexasTripletMom, Marijee, Charley, and JenLouise0201, persephonesfolly, and tnuccio for pushing me and making me better. I hope to hear from everyone again, sometime. You all rock amazingly!!!!!!! **


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